TAKING THE BLOODY PENG THREAD DOWNUNDER

[Hiram Sedai]

just for that, you're not getting your turn back until Sunday night, Shandorf.

sniffle

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

[Croda]

And I think he meant a different Jeff, Shandy Ducan. Lord knows that I wouldn't venture out there to be mean to you, when I can do it right here.

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WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! -

THIS SIG FILE BELONGS TO A COMPLETE FOO.

MR T WOULDN'T BE SO KIND AS TO WRINKLE AN EYEBROW AT THIS UNFORTUNATE BEING. PLEASE OFFER HIS PARENTS AND COHABITANTS ALL SYMPATHY POSSIBLE. MAY BE CONTAGIOUS. CONTAINS ARTIFICIAL SWEETNER, INTELLIGENCE AND WIT. STAND WELL CLEAR AND LIGHT WICK. BY ORDER PETERNZ

Damn Croda. That is one funny sig!!!

must suck to be you - Hiram Sedai

[jshandorf]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

No, Shandy Duncan. You've missed last weeks episode of "How the Pool Turns" Our hero played OGSF and lost. --- and lost

verstehen sie nichts?? I don't have a clue why I'm a Knight either. But, I'll be using my new status to get some free food in the cafeteria.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Actually, NO! I don't understand! How the hell does some whelp like Hiram get to be a knight by freakin' losing?! I am a hundred times a better CM player than Hiram and HE somehow beats someone in CM to be a knight?! For cripes sake! A freakin' corpse would provide more of a challenge then Hiram!

Someone please explain this! Seanachai?! You cannot stand by and let your precious squire unjustly win, can you? This reflects also upon you,... you sod!

Oh and Chup.. Did you send me the right file this time? All that paper writing fry your brains, huh?

Jeff

[Hiram Sedai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

My labia hurts and it just ain't fair I tell ya. Someone please explain this! Seanachai?! Could you please be nice to me and let me be your squire too? You cannot stand by and let your precious squire unjustly win, can you?

Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Croda was right. I hardly every call you Jeff. I should have said the other Jeff or something. I'm bad and should be spanked.

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

[bauhaus]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

Originally posted by bauhaus:

Hiram, shut the hell up. You are nothing more than the crud beneath my shoes when I walk through cow patties. If I truly wanted your opinion I would watch the children's shows you love so much. We all know that's how you get your stupid little jokes. And furthermore, you are not funny. Either taunt or get the hell out of this thread. Perhaps you should start your own Thread that says "Stupid Pet Tricks"

So, when you get the urge to post, do us all a favor and don't.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Call me stupid and slow (pauses for everyone to do just that), but when did I say this? Cause I didn't I tell you, I didn't. So Hiram, please, keep posting all the boring, useless, humorless crap that you do.

Nothing to see here you looky loo's. Move on.

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Just call me Bruce.

[jshandorf]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

just for that, you're not getting your turn back until Sunday night, Shandorf.

sniffle

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh but Hiram! I ever do so hang in baited breath for your next turn! Please send me a turn! Oh do! I want to watch your arty fall 200 meters behind my soldiers where they use to be! Oh please!

Ha! Your half-baked and inept. I laugh at your Knighthood and generally flop my thingies in your general direction. Until you actually beat me I will continue to mock your very existence if only to remind you of your insignificant presence in this world.

Jeff

[Marlow]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Actually, NO! I don't understand! How the hell does some whelp like Hiram get to be a knight by freakin' losing?! I am a hundred times a better CM player than Hiram and HE somehow beats someone in CM to be a knight?! For cripes sake! A freakin' corpse would provide more of a challenge then Hiram!

Someone please explain this! Seanachai?! You cannot stand by and let your precious squire unjustly win, can you? This reflects also upon you,... you sod!

Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

"Shandorf, a soldier, firm and sound of heart, And of buxom valour, hath by cruel fate And giddy Fortune's furious fickle wheel, That goddess blind, That stands upon the rolling restless stone-"

[Hiram Sedai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Marlow:

"Shandorf, a soldier, firm and sound of heart, And of buxom valour, hath by cruel fate And giddy Fortune's furious fickle wheel, That goddess blind, That stands upon the rolling restless stone-"

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

We knew that Shandy Duncan had a big butt. But, we did not know that he was buxom also. Perhaps Shandy cuts a matronly figure after all.

Shandorfus Gleutius Maximus

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

[jshandorf]

Don't you be dissing my buxom valor!

Anyway, to tell the truth I always wondered who this "Shandy Duncan" character was and now to my chagrin I realize it's me. Heh heh..

I was going to do game updates, but the last message I was typing got wiped and I am much too lazy to retype it all. So piss on ya.

Jeff

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I once killed a six pack just to watch it die.

[Berlichtingen]

PENG!

You miserable sod, I don't think you are recieving my e-mails. Did you get the file I sent? If not, we need to work something out.

[Seanachai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

PENG!

You miserable sod, I don't think you are recieving my e-mails. Did you get the file I sent? If not, we need to work something out.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Moi aussi, Peng fella. Haven't seen hide nor hair of you in days. Do I owe you a file or do you owe me? Good Lord, I hope Peng's inner Croda hasn't...done something to him.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 12-14-2000).]

[Seanachai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Actually, NO! I don't understand! How the hell does some whelp like Hiram get to be a knight by freakin' losing?! I am a hundred times a better CM player than Hiram and HE somehow beats someone in CM to be a knight?! For cripes sake! A freakin' corpse would provide more of a challenge then Hiram!

Someone please explain this! Seanachai?! You cannot stand by and let your precious squire unjustly win, can you? This reflects also upon you,... you sod!

Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

He wasn't made a Knight for losing, he was made a Knight for losing well. Plus we all like him. Don't ask me why, but for some reason he's genuinely likeable. Struggle against it as you will, you can't help but like him. Hell, I like him, and I don't even want to.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Marlow]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

Don't ask me why, but for some reason he's genuinely likeable. Struggle against it as you will, you can't help but like him. Hell, I like him, and I don't even want to.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

He's from Jersey and an Eagles fan, that's reason enough to hate him.

[jshandorf]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

He wasn't made a Knight for losing, he was made a Knight for losing well. Plus we all like him. Don't ask me why, but for some reason he's genuinely likeable. Struggle against it as you will, you can't help but like him. Hell, I like him, and I don't even want to.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Then pray tell what is the point of the Challenge? If it is not to win then what? What is the point since winning means nothing then why play? (Yes, I was one of those kids that didn't buy into the crap about "Winning isn't everything.")

Hiram likeable? Arrrrrgh! Noooooooo!

(Straightening composure) Well, then okay. I understand. I understand that knighthood has no bases in merit but is only distributed out on a whim like some watery tart handing out swords from ponds. Very well.

I see that I am going to have to take out my anger on the lot of you in our PBEMs.

Jeff

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I once killed a six pack just to watch it die.

[Lorak]

Actualy people,

OGSF was granted knighthood for winning.

But... truth be known I decided to award both of them knighthood for actualy being the first two squires to finsh the game. It has been several months and these are the only two guys who have played this match to completion. Hence the kindness on my part.

What so few of you seem to realize is this obvious fact. I am Lorak ! Period.

With temptation must always lie the realization of irredeemable evil. Irredeemable.Without hope. That concept, redemption, must be the crucial determinant in any dealings. Temper your blade when redemption is at hand, and strike hard and without remorse when your foe is beyond any hope of redemption.

I am Lorak ! Hear me and learn from my greatness.

Truly the Pool is always in a state of flux, delemma, and in a crisis of conscience and balance. What good thing does the pool hold? What is it that brings you here? Promotes your creativity?

Is it a love? compassion? understanding of our fellow outcast?

Nay. Not in this present incarnation, at least, But there is hope that the pool will find a light beneath its murderous form of an assassin.

Yes indeed I am Lorak the loathed. I would indeed be glad to hear that the pool has embraced the light of my wisdom. In truth though, I doubt that anyone or anything here will be able to pull that lost flame of compassion through the thick and impenetrable armor of disspassion the pool now wears.

Yes friends, I am Lorak the loathed, keeper of the pool tomb and guide to those that will listen.

Yes.. to some I am teacher, guide,and profit.

To others an idiot and a fool. But it matters not. For many great men have been idiots, and to many, the paths of greatness appear foolish...

I am Lorak.

[This message has been edited by Lorak (edited 12-14-2000).]

[Stuka]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lorak:

I decided to award both of them knighthood for actualy being the first two squires to finsh the game

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Gulp! Does that mean, Mr Lorak..Sir,.. that neither Croda nor myself will be knighted after our match is over? Even though I grind his nose into the earth while jumping up and down on the back of his head? And letting you all know about it?

Say it isn't so......

[Stuka]

Oh and by the way, my new Athlon system arrives tomorrow, so Herr Bauhaus and Herr Oberst, the wait for your impending topplement is nigh.

Beware your in-box gentlemen, for something wicked this way comes.......

Muahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

[OGSF]

Well, well well! Didnae we all wanna be Kanniggets all o' a sudden!? Ta mah way o' understandin', winnin' the Joust is important, but sae is tha tauntin' and stayin' power in tha' 'Pool. Ah had assumed that these last two were the basis fer Hiram's kanniggethood. An' Ah heartily approve.

StukaPukaPantas and Croda hae got the idea. CaptFoobar and Roborat ha' dropped off the face o' tha 'Pool.

Yoo that are whingin' lak some immigrant Pommy bastarrd cos ye coulda beat Hiram ha' missed the point. Ye widnae playin' him in a joust, were ye? Go an suffer through yer ain joust - our's were a bleedin' nightmare o' fog, night and conscripts that lasted almost three months.

There's more tae bein' a kannigget than bein' able tae win PBEMs' - ye just got tae look at Mori-(I'm a complete and useless twat)-arty's score ain the Cesspool page tae see that. If ever there were a soddin' piece o' bovine butt weep, there's ye mon. Yet he's still a kannigget.

Af'n ye not in a kannigget Joust, badger ye Sponsor tae get one gwin fer ye.

Meanwhile, Seanachai are ye gwintae put up, or wot?

SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastard

[Stuka]

Yeeeees, Robotwat and Captain Furball... did they fall in love and elope together?

[von shrad]

WoW. Leave the board for a few days and the thread explodes with postesess. Such efficient little fellows you are.

Stuka....It is your job, nay duty, to collect all of my errant E-mails, dust off the cover, and send to me so they get to the rightful place. You should be filled with the warmth of an Inner Croda to get a glimpse into the everyday life of someone of my caliber. Do not despair Stuka #2, you are the only true J-O 87.

Which leads me to my next observation....

Herr Eggbert you drunken old man. I am afraid you are befallen with Some-timers and it is adversely affecting your pitiful thought process. Now why don't you start remembering;

a) to send me the files and not that wannabe Pommie, Stuka and...

That you are not worthy of all the OBA your Senior Officers have so kindly given you. 350 rounds plus. Man you would think you were playing the Allies in another 'Let the Arty do our dirty work' campaign. You are a sad excuse for a German commander and if you were not kicking my ass like there is no tomorrow I would brag right here ...........................................................................................

Speaking of sad excuse for a German commander, Croda you come to mind. The only reason my troops thought it was a Tiger tank that was taken out is that only a dern fool would have attempted to mosey up the road with any other tank as you did into the face of my Jumbo. Also it was kind of hard to make one burning hull out from another as the road is littered with lost opportunities. Your MLR looks more like an inner-city salvage yard than a spearhead.

Mr.T says,"I pity the fool that squanders armor"

Ps. I hope you are enjoying all those candy-apples Mum has baked for you. Looks like there is indeed more than enough for each of your troops.

VS

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OGSF:

There's more tae bein' a kannigget than bein' able tae win PBEMs' - ye just got tae look at Mori-(I'm a complete and useless twat)-arty's score ain the Cesspool page tae see that. If ever there were a soddin' piece o' bovine butt weep, there's ye mon. Yet he's still a kannigget.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yep, totally useless but at least I had the sense to get in on the ground floor. Jealousy will get you nowhere, Sir OberNewbieBigMacGulper

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"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[Stuka]

Haha, nice one, my Knight, like it, like it.

*Grovel, grovel, Fawn, fawn*

[Seanachai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OGSF:

Meanwhile, Seanachai are ye gwintae put up, or wot?

Sir MacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastard <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Well, first I was tempted to ignore and dismiss you, then, in righteous indignation at your trouncing my Squire I had decided to club you to the ground, but then a wave of apathy rolled over me, but then again you quite rightly pointed out that Hiram (what a nice young man) certainly deserved being Knighted, so I shook off my apathy and decided you should be played. So I will send you a setup this weekend. Sorry it's not sooner, but there are a few roadblocks between me and the enjoyment of life right now, so Saturday is the first opportunity I will have to do much with the game. Post any requirements you have on the game, and perhaps just a quick note as to what suit you wished to be buried in, there's a good fellow.

Von Shrad old chum, same goes for you. Look for a setup from me this weekend, and, as stated above, post any requirements you might have about the form you wish your death to take.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[This message has been edited by Seanachai (edited 12-15-2000).]

[Herr Oberst]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by von shrad:

* buzzing insect noises *

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

As you can see, I need none of you pitiful lot to attempt my topplement. Why, on the average night, just a few more Jaegermeister's and I shall manage my own topplement out of the chair and onto the floor, thank-you-very-much.

As for my liberal application of artillery on your poor Pillsbury doughboys... well what did you expect when the force mix was chosen as Green?

Yes, green, green, green. As green as the tender branches of a willow tree, stripped of its leaves and flailed against the pimply bottoms of your bunch of warmaking tyros as I roust them off the map while they mutter things about "cultivating their Inner Croda's" or some such nonsense, and how "having attained Crodian elightenment, how could this be happening?" I will then claim the poor remnants of that village as my own.

Then to turn those branches lightly against the soft, rounded, oh-so-delectable derrieres of your former girlfriends in that village as we claim them as our own, teach them that your ineptitude on the battlefield is surpassed only by your ineptitude in the boudoir, making them curse your name, deny your existence, and revile any further contact with the likes of Ami vermin such as yourself...

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To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

[dalem]

How can so many "people" be so grog-like?

Cromag uses a whole company to defeat a picket platoon and begins wondering when Hollywood is going to call him with script ideas. "Mister Croda, you have successfully grasped the anvil. Now it is time to meet the hammer."

Jshandjob has been lulled into a coma by my stealthy and skillfull reconnoiter.

Marlowbrow frags one of my scoutie guys then plays peek-a-boo with my main force. A map bigger than the Spinward Marches from Traveller and he still can't find a comfy spot.

Peterpommie is somewhere on another godsawful large map, probably scouting likely latrine areas.