TAKING THE BLOODY PENG THREAD DOWNUNDER

[Mace]

By replying to this ..this.. outtie, aren't we acknowledging his existance?

Mace

[Stuka]

Rip off his head and s**t down his throat!

Rip off his arms and beat him with the soggy end!

That said........now bugger off!

[Chupacabra]

Right. Looks like I was having problems sending emails containing attachments (don't ask me, it's the university's ISP, I just use it) a few days ago. It SEEMS to have cleared up now.

If you sent me a file a few days ago and never received a reply, drag your face off mommy's withered tit for a sec and drop me a line.

Ta.

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Grand Poobah of the fresh fire of Heh.

[jdmorse]

The Oedipal battle to kill me and shag his mum is over. CrawdadwholosesasmuchasHiram has agreed to a cease fire resulting in a victory for truth, justice and multiple billing practices. Frankly, a surrender could have been forced eventually, but I'd have to waste ten more turns moping up the battlefield. After losing his tanks within 4 turns (a skill I have noticed that he has mastered quite capably) he met my friend, Mr VT. Somehow the boy was never quite the same thereafter.

But to give the little bugger credit, he is like eczema that just won't go away, dog**** that works its way into the soles of your shoes, like a stupid little mongrel that keeps chewing up your clothes and peeing on them. He doesn't give up. It's really like when you land a sand shark, gaffe it, smash it over the head and it still keeps thrashing, long dead but with out the brains to realize it.

So Lorak another win if you please and a loss for Croda.

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If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 12-16-2000).]

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by THumpre:

each, what did I just step in? Oh, I see, it is the Cesspool. That explains nearly everything, the the nasty references to people supposed heritages, the rampant abuse of the Scots and the French (not that they don't deserve it, at least the French do) and the general snarky rudeness. Well, well, place after my own heart if ever there was one. Although I know hardly any of you, (except for Moriarty but he never finished our game) I feel it appropriate to hurl my gauntlet down and say thus: Pfffffftttt! (Finger-wiggle-in-ear) <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Beg pardon, sir, but it was your turn to send a file. Must be that you knew the inevitability of my defeat and the thought plumb scared you off. Care to go again?

Be forewarned, however, that should you return to the 'pool to challenge, you must observe proper etiquette and TAUNT LIKE YOU GOTTA PAIR!*

(* the aforementioned exhortation of course does not apply to the women who occasionally frequent this den of iniquity.)

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"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 12-16-2000).]

[Seanachai]

SHUT THE BLEEDING HELL UP, ALL YOU RANK SMELLING, SELF-LOVING, NASTY BITS OF MORTALITY!

It seems that Peng, for those who actually still visit the main Board, is hospitalized with pneumonia. His recovery and return to us is, of course, assured. However, as this whole sodding Thread was started by yours truly to challenge Peng, and, as this Thread also belongs completely to Peng, I thought we might all take a moment to post a thought for Peng's rapid recovery. Each in our own way, of course. The main purpose of this, of course, is to cause Peng to bow his head in loathing and horror when he returns here and sees that people showed concern for him. Now, appropriately, I shall go first, as I tower over most of you grub worms both in human feeling and ability, not to mention that I am foremost amongst mankind in having Lost to Peng™.

Peng fella, I pray daily for your speedy recovery, and, being a Pagan, my prayers take the very proper form of offering up bits of my opponents to the gods in you name and for your health. My imminent rending of Andreas, also known amongst men and gods as Germanboy, I offer up for the recovery of Peng. My almost assured victories over Moriarity and Chrisl, I put forward for the gods' amusement and ask for the speedy recovery of Peng. My deserved victory against Mace, that Aussie pretender to the Peng Challenge Thread sponsorship and soon to be downunder whipping boy to yours truly, I stand on my head and make to the gods, and dedicate to the delivery of Peng from all danger. My imminent defeat to Bauhaus, I ask the gods to take particular note of and check record keeping, accounts, and the proper functioning of the rest of the universe, because there is simply no way this should have happened. And should the gods, upon taking an accounting, realize that this should never have occurred, and do their best to rectify the situation by at least granting me a draw against Bauhaus, I will dedicate that draw to the continuing glory of the gods, and to the glory and recovery of Peng.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[jdmorse]

For Peng: Wishing you a well and speedy recovery. After all you are high on my soon to dismember list.

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If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 12-16-2000).]

[jdmorse]

Lorak Sorry to disturb you again but there's another win to chalk up.

JD-Win

Chupcheeks- Loss

Thank you ever so much

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If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[Chupacabra]

Wrack it up, Lorak the Liquored-

Morse-win

Chup-loss

The lawyer managed to pry a tactical from me. Oh well. At least I got in a few swift kicks to his tacticals before I went down. Final score was 60-something to 30-something.

Shag a nurse for me, Peng.

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Soy super bien soy super super bien soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>

Posted by Sasquatch amid a volume of blather about Peng:

My almost assured victories over Moriarity

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Boy-o, you've got a long, long, long way to go to get to "almost assured victory."

But you'll never shorten the trip unless you send a turn.

Oh, by the by the latest medical update on MrPeng is that it ain't pneumonia ... the execrable pod is only reproducing.

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"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[Moriarty]

Move along. Nothing to see here. Move along, now.

[This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 12-16-2000).]

[Mark IV]

Peng:

Pore carefully through those viscous greenish hunks for the thoughts of your friends in the Cesspool, which are with you until you hawk them up. Wherever you expectorate, there we are. Look, there's a little Goanna now, poking it's head up.

This, of course, is what comes of sitting for days and weeks on people's turns. I should pound you again when you recover, as it's been awhile.

I am currently in the midst of a very painful transition from NT to W2K on the old laptop, and will shortly emerge a triumphant mobile wargamer (with sh*t for graphics) or stark raving mad. If it weren't for hardware and software this would be easy... damn Microsoft, Dell, and our IS department to successive levels of hell.

Get out of that hospital and back here where it's healthy...

[THumpre]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Moriarty:

Beg pardon, sir, but it was your turn to send a file. Must be that you knew the inevitability of my defeat and the thought plumb scared you off. Care to go again?

Be forewarned, however, that should you return to the 'pool to challenge, you must observe proper etiquette and TAUNT LIKE YOU GOTTA PAIR!*

(* the aforementioned exhortation of course does not apply to the women who occasionally frequent this den of iniquity.)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

My semi-humble pardons sir, I can only claim the only known example of a real Y2K problem or a meteor strike on my computer as the reason for this oversite. Certainly, I would gain much satisfaction from smacking your sniveling nacy-boys around again, send me a file and away we'll go. Be sure to stock up on your favorite lubricants cuz you know you will be walkin funny when we're done...As for those few semi-sentient bottom dwellers who strove to drive me away, I may be an "outie", but hey, I'm actually allowed outside by myself, unlike some who still require supervision.

(looks through bars and make obscene gestures at denizens inside)

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When one goes tear-assing around, one often ends up with a torn ass.

[David Aitken]

Moriarty wrote:

> [...] TAUNT LIKE YOU GOTTA PAIR!*

> (* the aforementioned exhortation of course does not apply to the women who occasionally frequent this den of iniquity.)

– What would happen if one had "got to pair" and was unable to satisfy this urge?

– How can you "occasionally frequent" a given place? You visit often but not very? Or you're there all the time but not usually?

– That depends what kind of a "pair" you're talking about.

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken:

Moriarty wrote:

– What would happen if one had "got to pair" and was unable to satisfy this urge?

– How can you "occasionally frequent" a given place? You visit often but not very? Or you're there all the time but not usually?

– That depends what kind of a "pair" you're talking about.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

David, you are learned in the language, which is a good thing. My responses to your valid and perceptive points are thus:

1. That if one's "got to pair" an' I got a full house, I win.

2. Purely a case of mentally but not physically or was that physically but not mentally?

3. Quite right.

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"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[PawBroon]

And lest I forgot.

I would also like to fail to mention that Peng fella whose health is of no concern for me.

After all, we French hold a running passion for pneumonia.

You are a pitiful excuse for a Lady of the Camellias, now go Die a Lot of consumption and let the pros in the limelights.

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After many weeks of exposure to Croda on the Thread, we had all developed Inner Crodas, the Peng Challenge Thread equivalent of crablice...

Senility

[Treeburst155]

Attention Cesspoolians! I've annihilated the AI, and humans cannot stand up to my tactical prowess. The time has come for me to use my gift for the benefit of mankind. The utter humiliation of a Cesspoolian would be a good first step. It is unfortunate that my duty to mankind and all that is decent requires me to deal with the likes of you cesspoolians, but it is my calling and I will see it through. If any of you scum dwellers has the guts, just email me and we can negotiate the parameters of the game. I'm not too picky but I like to hash things out a bit before embarking on a PBEM game, especially with this group. TCP/IP is out of the question because I don't want any Cesspoolians that intimately connected to my beloved machine. (I can't come up with the solid block of time actually).

If you wallow in an east coast cesspool we probably won't do more than two exchanges per day which is fine with me. West coast scum dwellers fit better into my time schedule so 3 to 4 exchanges each day are very possible. If your cesspool is Down Under then we can probably get in two exchanges per day. I've never played anyone from Europe so I don't know how our schedules would mesh but I'm willing to give it a go.

I can only take the first two as I am presently very busy advising the Mexican government on small unit tactics.

May you all drown in your own pool of cess.

Love always, Treeburst155

[David Aitken]

Treeburst155 wrote:

> Squeak urk mumfle rarg umph

What was that? There's a weird echo in here.

[Guest Germanboy]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Treeburst155:

BLABLABLA The time has come for me to use my gift for the benefit of mankind. more BLABLABLA<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Err, the gift of two legs enabling you to jump off a bridge?

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Andreas

<a href="http://www.geocities.com/greg_mudry/sturm.html">Der Kessel</a >

Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[This message has been edited by Germanboy (edited 12-17-2000).]

[Mace]

Is that front door off it's hinges again?

We seem to be getting all sorts of riff-raff (no, not you Mensch) and reprobates (Mensch, I said sit down!) in here of late!

Mace

[Speedy]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

Peng fella, I pray daily for your speedy recovery

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

What's this you bloody scots wannabe, I'm buggered if I'm going to recover him!

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Work is the curse of the drinking class.

I have nothing else to say. Ya, quote that you rat bastards.

-Meeks

[mensch]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

We seem to be getting all sorts of riff-raff (no, not you Mensch)

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I my dear fraggelrock mace... I am not riff-raff, riff-raff are all you reject pommies down under. I am just plain insane.. please don't confuse that with those pecks that come in here to see if they have a pair.

[This message has been edited by mensch (edited 12-17-2000).]

[mensch]

<center><h3>LORAK!</h3></center>

I will now speak loud!

I HAVE WON AGAINST THE FRENCHIE POOPOOBROOM! YES YES.. THANK YOU. IT WAS WONDERFULL..NO YK2 TO SAVE HIM AS SHE HAS DONE FOR ME (THANKS SWEET) MUHAHAHA!

HERE IS THE TALLY OF DEATH WHICH I HAVE DELT TO THY BROONIES MUGWATT FESTERING BUTTOKS

HE WAS NATURALY FRENCH AND I DEUTSCH

Allies (french toast tussies)

19 casulties (4 KIA)

31 Captured

8 vehicles knocked out

0 men OK

score (drum roll please...) 12%

AXIS (german schnitzel machine)

10 casulties (3 KIA)

1 vehicle knocked out

44 men OK

score 88%

now boohooBroomie is eating bratwurst and sauerkraut in my POW camp.

PS don't bug Sgt. Schultz

[PawBroon]

Now the fact that we were all random, including quality and purchasing might have escaped your mind already.

You my fellow Gloater (and NO Bauhaus I didn't say GOATER so you can let Peter go) are quite prone to forget that it was your ONLY victory so far and that the main factor was sheer blind luck in the randomization...

Move out now, I got to randomize Emma to see if it was a bug.

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After many weeks of exposure to Croda on the Thread, we had all developed Inner Crodas, the Peng Challenge Thread equivalent of crablice...

Senility

[mensch]

aaw broomie you know blaming other or something on your failure is no excuse!.. take the blame like a Gaulier! be proud.. that you have done the right thing and surrendered like the french did in 1940. I'm proud of you boy.

for the others.. I Challange this le pardon moi monseur once again.. so far no responce..