Peng Challenge Thread - From Barbarous to Boring

[bauhaus]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Juardis:

EGADS!!!!

As for this other thing, this serf thing. I'd like to thank boohouse for giving me the motivation to continue. Without his support (private emails and such), my dream one day becoming a big and fearsome KNIGHT might have ended on the 3rd page of the last thread. My half-cocunut bag is full brave sir Robi...er...boohouse.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm glad I provided some motivation. As for your email responses to mine. You know, the photos of yourself in various positions with sheep. While Mace would approve, I'd like to ask you to stop. It is not the Cesspool way. And you should be ashamed of yourself, a threesome with two ewes. Have you no morals?

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: bauhaus ]

[CMplayer]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

A very weak effort I'm afraid, lad. You'll have to do better to acheive Serf.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

But you see, Joe, it's like this:

"I gotta be Me, I gotta be Me, I gotta

be Me, oh woah, yeah got ta be MEEEEEEEEE."

That means:

"I can't be another Joe, No not another Joe,

No I can't be no Joe, no, no no, woah woah

uh-oh."

(Sorry for disappointing your newly-awakened

paternal feelings)

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: CMplayer ]

[**YK2**]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon:

If ZeBroom is gone then behold the joyful if somewhat unadulterated lust of mine that I’m to unleash on Fair Emma.

It will be of Biblical proportion!

Well, err, not Biblical as in Sodom and Gomorrah for I am not that French mind you…

Neither would it be Biblical as with that locust plague the Outer Boarders had to toy with.

I’m not sure about the locusts though, it could well have been #176 or Barbara Streisand for all I care…

So Emma, have you forced Marcel to give you Sweet Lovin’ an absurd amount of time speeding his urge to quit?

{Editor’s Note: Absurd amount of Sweet Lovin’ being around 27 for the average Frog, peer reviewed by the INSEE, penetration value and iconography by Rexford}.

If so, could you be so nice and let go of his by now dehydrated contraption and have him click on some other buttons to crank up those turns he owes most of us?

Unless it is the soon to be displayed Asterisk of Shame that Peng is about to inflict on Marcel with the same stunning power as personal hygiene.

Of course, I’m told he was using simple grunts and M20s against warring SS and assorted Stugs and Hetzers but that’s beside the point and as CoolDeadMan would say: “You Poolers are gamey Sons of a Code Cheat! Now tell me if mortars are the same as fighter bombers?!

But I’m digressing…

Or maybe not, Am I being just me?

So, have I asked where Marcel was already?

Oh boy! Do I miss the little twit…

Marcel, man to man, as a French, do you pluck your eyebrows?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Did I miss something? I have searched HIGH and LOW for the above post which I assume was made by Sean then pasted by *sigh* Marcel But I can't find the damn thing anywhere..... did a search, came up with ZILCH.. strange thing is I had this weird feeling of De'ja vous (whatever)while reading said post, that's twice in a week now,is it a post from the distant past or am I going mad from lack of intercourse? (verbally speaking of course).

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>(Sorry for disappointing your newly-awakened paternal feelings)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Look you lad, did we not tell you to SOD OFF? Several times IIRC. You apparently didn't feel like we really MEANT it and chose to stick around. First I'd like to make it clear that we DID mean it and you really should SOD OFF. Second, however, since you DID choose to stick around it's our DUTY, do you see, to guide you toward your presumed goal of Serf ... either that or to get you to SOD OFF which is STILL our preferred course of action for you. There is no "paternal instinct" involved, it's OUR DUTY TO THE CESSPOOL. Either you shape UP or Ship OUT ... shipping out in this case to be considered the equivilant of SODDING OFF. Hope this helps you to make up your mind and you STILL have a goofy handle, haven't you fixed that YET?

Joe

[Marlow]

I told you this was a bad idea:

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

{Stick Around Damn It, we're tired of people who wander in and waste our time and then never show up again ...

Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Now it has come back to haunt you:

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer:

But you see, Joe, it's like this:

"I gotta be Me, I gotta be Me, I gotta

be Me, oh woah, yeah got ta be MEEEEEEEEE."

That means:

"I can't be another Joe, No not another Joe,

No I can't be no Joe, no, no no, woah woah

uh-oh."

(Sorry for disappointing your newly-awakened

paternal feelings)

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sort of like a (particularly ugly) puppy that followed you home, and soiled the carpet.

He's yours now, we expect you to feed him, take him for walks, and generally take care of him. That or you could take him out an shoot him.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>He's yours now, we expect you to feed him, take him for walks, and generally take care of him. That or you could take him out an shoot him.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh ...

BANG!

Takes care of that problem ... do you think the one bullet will do it? Oh well, if he crawls back we'll take it from there.

As for you Marlow I done 'splaned this oncet before and I ain't a gonna 'splain it again.

Joe

[Stixx]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Herr Oberst:

All we can await, in our infinite displeasure, is the evolution of this Stixx SSN into something more advanced and worthy of something larger than these few scant moments of attention.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Hey i got a few scant moments of attention?

COOL

Herr OberstIt is obvious by your post that you "Displeasure" my company to some extent. This alarms me in a way only known by a "youngling who knows nothing but his mothers petticoats to hide behind".

I hope only to be disliked by others but not by you. I wish to be despised by you, that you would detest me being able to draw oxygen from the air with my lungs. That you would Loathe me for who i am not what i am.

A SSN

[PawBroon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2:

Am I going mad from lack of intercourse?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Dial 911!

For you it would be 999.

Unless you happen to be in Paris and that's 17 but should you be in France you wouldn't call GhostBusters for lack of intercourse.

So, who you gonna call?!

[Edited because I said F**K in here somewhere and quite frankly we can't have that.]

[ 08-21-2001: Message edited by: PawBroon ]

[stevetherat]

I have been wronged. A great and rightuous victory has been snatched from my rightful and honourable bosom by the very lowest of thieves.

Iskander! I uncloak thee for the world to cast stones upon.

All was as it should be - my great and stout Arian champions bodly standing their ground against the hoards of capitalist pigs, chewing gum and playing jazz. Then, just before this battle was declared, he rushes my flags like rabid pidgeons around an old haggard woman bringing out her mouldy bread.

I cannot believe this scoundrel managed to squeeze out a DRAW! (are you paying attention Lorak?)

Barsteward!

StR

[Stixx]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

Tell me, Stixx, how do you pronounce that "double X"? Are there any other words in the English Language with a double X, or ANY language for that matter? Are you named after a fagot, or bundle of sticks? Are you named after the "Arena-rock" band Styx? Why not go ahead and use the 'Y', you've already got two 'x's...

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Do you want the truth? Nah you don't want the truth thats while i give it to ya.

It's pronounced Sticks. I was given the nickname at work for being skinny. Someone somewhere once spelt it as Stix. I was registered with the name Stix but the last time the board broke down i was unable to retrieve that name so i added a X.

Happy?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

Man I tell ya, it seems like each SSN has a name worse, less imaginative, and closer to L33T DUUDZ than the last.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Well Sir Panzer Leader is your name all that imaginative? Can you actually LEAD Panzers?.

I bet you couldn't lead a Company on Panzers thru a valley of AT guns & Infantry.

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Mace, with the conniving assistance of a horrid scenario created by Goanna, is taking absolutely forever to make a move. I suspect that his glacial pace is influenced by the amount of snow in the scenario.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

A very correct summation there Joe Shaw. Every time my uberhamstertruppen take 2 steps, they fall down in a heap exhausted and decide it's much more fun making snow men or writing their signatures in the snow the way men normally do in that situation.

Btw, did I see an 'F' word somewhere above?

In that case: This Peng Challenge thread has been rated R. SSN of any age are unable to attend (ie SOD OFF!)

Mace

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

[Mace]

Aaargh!

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

[Stalin's Organ]

Only an Orrzy could edit a one word posting!

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Well Sir Panzer Leader is your name all that imaginative? Can you actually LEAD Panzers?. I bet you couldn't lead a Company on Panzers thru a valley of AT guns & Infantry.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Now look, this simply won't DO! The above ... twaddell ... is NOT up to CessPool standards ... in fact it's not up to 6th grade standards. I suggest that young Sickxx either improve or SOD OFF!

And yes Mace I also noticed the offense, but let's remember ... he's French! However, perhaps Pawbroon could edit his post so that we stay within BTS guidelines?

Joe

[dalem]

Okay, I'm going to remain calm. No clutching my face and screaming about my eyes, no wit, no japes, no barbs, no taunts.

On the Outerboards someone is talking about an 8000 point game. 8000 points. 8000 points.

Why?

[Panzer Leader]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stixx:

I bet you couldn't lead a Company on Panzers thru a valley of AT guns & Infantry.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm quite sure I could lead them INTO said valley, but out the other side is another matter...

[BFCElvis]

Hmmm....just wanted to try one of these....it wasn't as much fun as I thought it would be.

[Stixx]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Now look, this simply won't DO! The above ... twaddell ... is NOT up to CessPool standards ... in fact it's not up to 6th grade standards. I suggest that young Sickxx either improve or SOD OFF!

Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

and what.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> I done 'splaned this oncet before and I ain't a gonna 'splain it again.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Is up to standards?

To i have to downgrade my posts from a "Grade 6" level to a grade 3 standard such as your own?

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: Stixx ]

[BFCElvis]

Now that jdmorse has been put in his place I think it may be time to stir the pot by bringing everyone up to date on my PBEM games.

Wildman was so shocked by my 14" gun (sit down bauhaus) that he i still reeling from the shock. I did just notice that I never played the last turn he sent. I am conducting a perfect assault across virtually open ground.

Joanna,in our Blood Hamster, has finally gotten some troops across the bridge. However they are in such poor shape and my troops are still in great shape so I expect a surrender fromhim shortly. If he doesn't do it the AI probably will.

LEON, whom I hate, is taken a bit of a beating in what is now a battle of attrition. His armor keeps getting knocked out leaving his infantry exposed to the relentless pounding of my Shemies.

Lawyer was getting smacked around so bad that he had to leave the country.

Lorak and I have been engaged in one of the silliest games in CM history. I haven't seen a file from him in a long time. Prhaps he has decided it is to silly to play this meeks nightmare. My only hope for this game is that it ends in a draw..neither of us deserves to lose this thing.....or win it.

A final word to mensh and Berli and Germangirl. I have now played all three of your mini games and found them to be a great deal of fun. Keep up the good work.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>and what.

{QUOTE} I done 'splaned this oncet before and I ain't a gonna 'splain it again.{QUOTE}

Is up to standards?

To i have to downgrade my posts from a "Grade 6" level to a grade 3 standard such as your own?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Okay lad, you started this and now you'll reap the whirlwind:

(vii) I am a Seniour Knight of the CessPool and it is NOT up to you to judge my posts.

(7.890) Learn UBB before you try to use it.

(ref a) Let's examine your first "statement" shall we? <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>and what.

... my quote inserted incorrectly ...

Is up to standards?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> So ... if we read this properly it reads "and what ... is up to standards?" Now I'm sorry but that just doesn't make sense.

{2*5.5) Let's look at your second statement: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>To i have to downgrade my posts from a "Grade 6" level to a grade 3 standard such as your own?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I normally don't point out spelling and gramatical errors but in this case I must: It's not "To" it's "Do" and the "i" should be capitalized donchaknow.

() The use of colloquial language is a well accepted literary technique and is especially effective when used in juxtaposition (sit DOWN Bauhaus) with proper construction.

In short, you once again have failed the test. I'm beginning to despair, my lad, next time you post ... make it worthwhile.

You know I really should CHARGE for this, my squires didn't get this kind of knowledge for free. Of course the THOUGHT of Sickxx as a squire for ANYONE ...

Joe

[Juardis]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bauhaus:

I'm glad I provided some motivation. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yes, you were most encouraging during my darkest hours here (although it really wasn't that dark, quite contrary, it was kinda light, but dark still compared to light I suppose). Anyway, yes, thank you for the kind words. I do understand that you had to act all mean and stuff to keep up the appearance of being a big and fearsome knight and all, so I won't go into details.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>

As for your email responses to mine. You know, the photos of yourself in various positions with sheep. While Mace would approve, I'd like to ask you to stop. It is not the Cesspool way. And you should be ashamed of yourself, a threesome with two ewes. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Lies, lies, and damned LIES. The fact that you editted your post proves you're liar. First off, that wasn't me, and second off, those were inflatable ewes {that is, of course, presuming I believe the viscious, malicious, delicious, CAPRICIOUS lies you are spewing, which I don't}. ....Where was I? Oh YES! QUite right! damned LIES. See, I burned those pictures long ago, so there is NO way those pictures could have surfaced after so many years. There was this one guy though who always insisted on being first (they would deflate after use and constant inflation was required, assuming I know what you're lying about), and...hey, wait a minute, you're not he are you? Smedley Brewhouse? Is that you? Well slap my head and call me Polish, but that does explain your outward reactions towards me. And here I thought it was because you were a big and fearsome knight. I'm so sorry about all that. I didn't tell anyone about it after the men in white suits came, and I thought I burned those pictures as I said, but apparently you still have yours? Oh geez man, shred them ASAP! You don't want to be interned again do you?!?!

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Have you no morals?

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: bauhaus ]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No, but what does THAT have to do with anything?

[Stixx]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I normally don't point out spelling and gramatical errors but in this case I must: It's not "To" it's "Do" and the "i" should be capitalized donchaknow.

() The use of colloquial language is a well accepted literary technique and is especially effective when used in juxtaposition (sit DOWN Bauhaus) with proper construction.

In short, you once again have failed the test. I'm beginning to despair, my lad, next time you post ... make it worthwhile.

You know I really should CHARGE for this, my squires didn't get this kind of knowledge for free. Of course the THOUGHT of Sickxx as a squire for ANYONE ...

Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Jeez who forgot to take their heart medication this morning? Take a chill pill before you have a coronary dude.

BTW.

Is this really you?

What are you holdin in ya hand there M8?

Snot Rag? Tampon? Dunny paper? Birth Certificate? nah your too old it would of decomposed by now.

[Lars]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>

Originally posted by Jar-O-P*ss:

Well slap my head and call me Polish<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No problem!

WHACK!

You're Polish.

no offense to any real Poles of course, I mean, having this guy in your gene pool, really, Sheesh...

[Stixx]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

I'm quite sure I could lead them INTO said valley, but out the other side is another matter...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Could you take this flag?

[ 08-20-2001: Message edited by: Stixx ]

[Juardis]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lars:

No problem!

WHACK!

You're Polish.

no offense to any real Poles of course, I mean, having this guy in your gene pool, really, Sheesh...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Thank you squire.

Yes, quite right, just a euphemism. My bad. I meant to say slap my head and call me french since I think a mere pissboy would upgrade the overall perception of the frogs.