dalem Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Seanachai: Ahem. Much as I would desire to remain above this sort of 'Pop Culure' cheapening of our sacred Peng Challenge Thread values, it behooves me to say that James T. Kirk was the lowest and most feeble Garden Gnome of Starfleet Captains. Everything about Kirk was hateful in the eyes of the gods. From his horrendous 'over-the-top' pretenses at acting, to his willingness (shared by 'Next Generation's' Riker) to have it off with everything in space, he defamed and belittled everything that would have made Mankind's leaving this planet worthwhile. As our 'First Ambassador', the only 'logical' response of every race encountered would have been the genocide of humanity. You are obviously drunk. Kirk was a kickass mammajamma with a wraparound girdle and a double handed space karate chop that laid many a bad guy low. Picard was an ugrade in many ways, and formidable on almost all fronts, but, it must be admitted, a bit of a prancer. Sisko was a professor in space, definitely someone you'd want on your side. Janeway was a walking, croaking, bad hair day. A three-pack-a-day indecisive loser who should've been blown out an airlock at the first opportunity. She obviously slept with someone in Starfleet Central to get a command in the first place, and was equally as obviously atrocious in the sack in the second place to get stuck with a midget ship with stupid warp drive nacelles that rotated back and forth. Hello? Why? Why do they rotate? What possible advantage would you derive by mechanical movement when you can easily manipulate the warp field with stationary nacelles? Why did the show need to be "saved" by a mediocre blond with top heavy accoutrements? Why did they copy Babylon 5 for effects? How can you have a holographic doctor? What? Hello? But, as I said, you are no doubt merely drunk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Joe. Snip....It's the taunting, the challenging, it's ... the STYLE!Well there you go. How silly of me not to have seen that in all your posts. What fine examples of nothingness they are. Look. It's easy. Everyone else has put the boots in on the last couple of pages, so I'll go and check my e-mail for a 1500point QB from you. That way neither of us have to waste time trading insults in public until after you have lost. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Why did the show need to be "saved" by a mediocre blond with top heavy accoutrements? Elementary my dear Dalem...to hide the problem of weak story lines. WELL hidden behind STRONG character thingies. It gave the stories some added "focus". (Admittedly double vision though) And Janeway got better. Kirk never did. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Dear dalem, You left one out. What of Jonathan Archer? In spite of that fact that I am a massive Star Trek geek I must hold back my comments on the issues you bring up or this conversation will just continue and nobody wants that. I will however ask for clarification on what you mean about Sisko. The guy who played him was perhaps the worst actor to get a starring role on television and literally unwatchable. By the time the second season ended I wouldn't even turn the show on anymore and if it was on I would change the channel but made a point to never miss a Voyager (so what does that tell ya). Die young and poor, Elvis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Seanachai: so great a nation Ahhh, Seanachai's talking about Australia again. Thanks mate, your'e the Gnomieist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 All of you wrote: [QB]TRIPE[QB]I hate you forever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 and there's no way I'm going to edit that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Elvis: Dear dalem, You left one out. What of Jonathan Archer? In spite of that fact that I am a massive Star Trek geek I must hold back my comments on the issues you bring up or this conversation will just continue and nobody wants that. I will however ask for clarification on what you mean about Sisko. The guy who played him was perhaps the worst actor to get a starring role on television and literally unwatchable. By the time the second season ended I wouldn't even turn the show on anymore and if it was on I would change the channel but made a point to never miss a Voyager (so what does that tell ya). Die young and poor, ElvisWhy in GODS NAME are none of you raising the issue of which of the Doctor Who's was the best?? Clearly, this <U>pre-eminent</U> SciFi proggy which was the basis for all SciFi to come after ..... including Start Wreck, deserves more than it's fair share of air time here? And by god it SHALL (even tho' I s'pect yo manky 'Merkins to be as of this minute enquiring Doctor ... WHO???"! Indeed, even the lowly I could see a Peng Challenge Thread title inspired by this classic show. How about "Doctor Who And The Pod People - A Challenge to Peng"? Hmmmm... Anyways, my vote goes to John of the Pertwee. His foppish nonchalance in the face of hordes of Davros's clanking cardboard and plastic Daleks {oh, the horror ..... the HORROR} hooting "EX-TERM-INATE....." while firing deadly capgun rounds was truly ... inspiring! What say you learned folk of the Cess?? Show your broad knowledge of such things <U>important</U>. AJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 More importantly, who would win a Super-Pershing-vs-Dalek grudge match? How about King Tiger-vs-Dalek? Just what angle is that armor sloped at? Do the little bobbly bits constitute weak spots? And could you just outflank the little buggers by exploiting the fact that they would be confined to nice flat smooth roads at all times? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 John Wayne can kick Kirk's ass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted April 23, 2002 Author Share Posted April 23, 2002 My favorite doctor was the one with the long scarf and the curly hair. I forgot the actor's name though. He was much more entertaining than the doctor who drove the stupid little car, or the doctor with the shaggy coat, or even the doctor with that goofy little suit with blonde hair. My favorite line from the show was when someone asked him his name and he said "The Doctor" They said "Doctor who?" and he said "Exactly" I'm amazed that they never figured out that a flight of stairs would stop the daleks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 I liked the scarfy one too, as for the one with the funny suit? I assume you are talking about the one that followed the scarfy one, if so he is actually attired in cricket whites if memory serves me correctly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 I can still remember, as a wee laddy, sneaking out of bed to spy around the corner of the hallway into the living room to watch the original Doctor Who when it was still black and white TV. (The actor was a dark haired gent as I recall) The episode I remember had these huge spiders in it and as such I now hold the BBC responsible for my arachnophobia. Mind you, I also hold the 'Dukes of Hazzard' responsible for my love of orange V8 musclecars and 'ABBA' responsible for my love of blonde chicky-babes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by dalem: Janeway was a walking, croaking, bad hair day. A three-pack-a-day indecisive loser who should've been blown out an airlock at the first opportunity. She obviously slept with someone in Starfleet Central to get a command in the first place, and was equally as obviously atrocious in the sack in the second place to get stuck with a midget ship with stupid warp drive nacelles that rotated back and forth. Hello? Why? Why do they rotate? What possible advantage would you derive by mechanical movement when you can easily manipulate the warp field with stationary nacelles? Why did the show need to be "saved" by a mediocre blond with top heavy accoutrements? Why did they copy Babylon 5 for effects? How can you have a holographic doctor? What? Hello? He tasks me this one. Yes, he tasks me. My drear dalem. You have the mind of a four year old child and I'll wager he was glad to get rid of it. That you are still prattling your puerile nonsense about the formidable and coquettish Janeway proves to me that you know nothing about the fairer sex. Other than that they frighten you. You fuzzy-cheeked lemur. I would feel pity for you if I wasn't so full of loathing for your very existence. Who didn't feel some visceral thrill the first time we saw Janeway on the bridge facing a crisis with her almost more than adequate presence? As she would stand there, feet braced wide apart, fists on hips, head thrown back, chestal region aimed straight forward, who of us didn't almost expect her to sing out, "I'm Hans Christian Anderson! Anderson, that's me!" Kirk could have studied at her feet and possibly, possibly learned enough to be able to turn in a performance that didn't leave the bridge knee-deep in turkey feathers. Though I doubt it. Oh, and yes, yes, yes, Dr. Who was wonderful and all that but to my mind nothing will ever beat MST3K. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 What IS this Dr. Whatever nonsense anyway? As if any English production could hope to match the masterpieces of American production! Yes, yes, Picard was British BUT ON AN AMERICAN SHOW and that, as they say, makes all the difference. Hiram I'm going out on a limb here and making a presumption that your latest diatribe was intended to convey MORE than just another spittle flecked, age discriminating tirade on your part but for the life of me I don't see the point ... well, other than the one atop your head but your hair hides that pretty well. Noba, after my masterful and persuasive argument in favor of the Code Duello and Stylish challenges the BEST you could do was "Uh ... dude ... like send me a 1500 point QB man ... okay?" It wasn't like this on the OLDE Board. And I'll hear no more talk of that abomination Janeway either, puts me right off my food it does. Seven of Nine, OTOH, seems a GOOD topic for discussion ... and photos come to think of it. So ... is this the hottest Star Trek babe ever? I reserve my judgement on this one in order to foster an open and wide ranging debate. I've found in the past that MY vote can influence the weaker minds amongst us "Oh My, the Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread has found crunchy peanut butter best, I suppose I'd best run down and buy some." So I want to open the discussion and allow ALL to have free rein to speak what little exists of their minds. Joe [ April 23, 2002, 10:30 AM: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Another game of "Jabos!" for the ledger sheet. Lars – Playing as Rooster Cogburn with a Gatling Gun. Simon – Playing as the Red Shirt Security Guy. BTW the only good Dr. Who episode was the one with the spaceship on a piece of clearly visible fishing line. Oh, wait a minute, that was all of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 It looks like at long last I have reached the end of the River Peng. In what a sad, pathetic state of affairs do I find the long sought after outpost? Debates over whether Kirk can kick Picard’s ass, vaguely homoerotic longings for Dr. Who, the Justicar starting a “Am I a Hot Cyborg or Not” contest, pictures of garden gnomes … A truly wretched and pathetic sight. Even the Devil seems bored. Where is the taunting? The challenging? The primal hatred? I miss even the incomprehendible uttering and mutterings of Mench and The French. Where is the later day Meeks? Who will remember the glory of a sound Penging? None I fear. Instead the once glorious MBT is reduced to Star Trek and Dr. Who (which aside from the original Star Trek series are so utterly awful that the creators should be tried for crimes against humanity). The horror, the horror. My advice for the natives of the Schloss Peng is the same as Kurtz’s: Exterminate all the Brutes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Croda: John Wayne can kick Kirk's ass.One of the things I have always found hardest to understand about Croda is his habit of continually stating and repeating the obvious, as in "It's a nice day", or "You're very tall", or "Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you all right?" At first I formed a theory to account for this strange behavior. If Croda doesn't keep exercising his lips, I thought, his mouth would probably seize up. After a few months' consideration and observation I abandoned this theory in favor of a new one. If Croda doesn't keep on exercising his lips, his brains start working. After a while I abandoned this one as well as being overly optomistic, for it assumes Croda has any brains at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Elvis: Dear dalem, You left one out. What of Jonathan Archer? He seems to be shaping up - I actually don't hate the show, but want to give it a full season before I pass judgement. In spite of that fact that I am a massive Star Trek geek I must hold back my comments on the issues you bring up or this conversation will just continue and nobody wants that. I will however ask for clarification on what you mean about Sisko. The guy who played him was perhaps the worst actor to get a starring role on television and literally unwatchable. By the time the second season ended I wouldn't even turn the show on anymore and if it was on I would change the channel but made a point to never miss a Voyager (so what does that tell ya). I was never a fan of Deep Sleep Nine and didn't watch it much at all, but people I know and respect (i.e. none of you lot) did like it and thought the Sisko character was all right. -- At least he wasn't terrible like that horrible Janeway. Anyone who doesn't hate Janeway is obviously so twisted and divorced from reality that I can't even be bothered to make up insults about you. It's one thing to admit to being a Dr. Who fan - that's more of a sickness and I pity the victims of that particular malady. But to honestly refuse to loathe the terrifying badness that was Kate Mulgrew's character, to accept the travesty that was her role.... I am speechless. [ April 23, 2002, 11:17 AM: Message edited by: dalem ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by dalem: I am speechless.If only. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by AussieJeff: <font size="-1">which of the Doctor Who's was the best?? Anyways, my vote goes to John of the Pertwee.</font>While I grant you that Pertwee was amusing, Tom Baker was clearly the superior Doctor Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Well well. After a long stretch of merciless sodomy at the hands of my Mistress Fate, I have finally found a spot of brightness. No, it's not the onset of a blackout, it's more like the approach of a distant train at the end of the tunnel of BS that I've been forced to endure in my many games of late. I've suffered through my Panthers bouncing rounds off Shermans at 60m. I've endured AI force picks that would make any anti-balance supporters cheer. I've watched my cherry Veteren reserves break and run within thirty seconds of commitment to desultory fire. I've been shot through houses. I've been KOd by advancing things I couldn't see. I've been brewed up by the targets of my ineffectual ambushes. Usually all of these things happen within the same scenario. But O, dear Pondscum, my mantle seems to have passed to you this last turn. The things you meet on Mulberry Street! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hakko Ichiu Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: While I grant you that Pertwee was amusing, Tom Baker was clearly the superior DoctorYou would say that, wouldn't you? Sorry, but Venusian Karate beats a sonic screwdriver and a bag of jellybabies any day of the week. As to Star Trek babes, Ensign Penthouse, aka Tasha Yar, takes first place, while the Vulcan chick w/the bodacious tatas comes in second. Note that this is not a value judgement on a "spread" in Penthouse vs. a spread in Maxim/FHM/Stuff/Loaded, merely an observation of the obvious. As to those who find this particular incarnation of the MBT slightly below par and generally lacking in taunting goodness, I would remind them that this entire conversation started with a taunt from yours truly, so there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 Dr. Who? *YAWN* Roddenberry crap? *BIG YAWN* This is getting a bit tedious now. If you wish to discuss this tripe, please take it to Mouse's "I Am So Excited About Getting New Star Wars Toys That I ****e Myself This Morning" thread in the General Forum. In this, the Muthah Beautiful Thread, we should return to the vile taunting of our forefathers. Or at least to the annoyances and hatreds of yore. For instance, yeknod the backwards and I are currently waiting on our seconds to get a map and pick forces for our soiree. Unfortunately, we chose Joe and WTF-IS-OGSF? as our seconds. Between the one's senility, and the others ability to mangle ANY language, I suspect we won't get started until sometime in 2008. It's a pity, because yeknod is little more than a pretentious prancing gadfly with delusions of self-worth. I had hoped to impart to him some insight as to his TRUE nature by ruthlessly exposing his weaknesses and ineptitude on the field of honor. In short, I had hoped to force The Mask of Shame upon him. Alas, it does not appear the lessons will begin any time soon. Cheese sandwich, anyone? Steve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted April 23, 2002 Share Posted April 23, 2002 For instance, yeknod the backwards and I are currently waiting on our seconds to get a map and pick forces for our soiree. Unfortunately, we chose Joe and WTF-IS-OGSF? as our seconds. Between the one's senility, and the others ability to mangle ANY language, I suspect we won't get started until sometime in 2008.Look, we don't expect much from lawyers, especially wannabe lawyers, especially wannabe lawyers who STILL have a sig line that refers to something that IS NO LONGER RELEVANT, but we DO expect that if you are to use seconds that you make them aware of some of the ... I don't know ... PARAMETERS you expect perhaps? If you wanted a map, you could have said so, if you wanted us to place units, you could have said so, but NOOOOOooooooo! Just the bare mention of "Oh, I'll have Joe as my second." Well that's NOT the way it's done in the Code Duello mate. As to OGSF ... {snicker} well, best of luck to Yeknodathon, that's all I can say. Sooooo, how's about giving us a clue there lad and I'll whip up a map that will do honor to Ker Dessel*! Joe *Ker Dessel, when you want to play CM in the Worst Way! [ April 23, 2002, 01:36 PM: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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