THE BLOODY PENG CHALLENGE THREAD: ESCAPE FROM DOWNUNDER

[Stuka]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

I'll take both you bludgers on....this will be just like a typical night at any country pub!

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yes, you boys go fight out the front while your old uncle stukey goes out the back and knocks off the stereos from your cars.

I'll see you back in the main bar just after I get back from Cash converters.

Oh and Macey gray, I'm gonna leave your car alone, 8-tracks have not been 'in' since the seventies.

[GI Tom]

Well, I see everyone is settling in nicely. Let me just update my one and only game that I have going on with a fellow Cesspooler. This game happens to be with Morsel, that sniveling, caniving, litigating baaastad.

It appears that I will lose. As a matter of fact, it appears that an auto surrender is close to happening, which will be the first time since I've played CM. A sad day indeed.

Anyhoo, the reasons for my upcoming loss are both compelling and informative. I would urge all of you not fall into a similar trap with morse.

Let me begin by saying that, had my guns been of the 76 mm variety instead of the 75 mm variety, a whole different story would have emerged out of this game. It's quite obvious that the 75mm lacks punch. Clearly, the accuracy issues involved are atrocious. Furthermore, my on map mortors (not mortars) couldn't fire indirectly which caused me a huge problem. Everyone knows they should be able to fire indirectly, don't make me quote real life occurrences.

Then there was the Sharpshooter/Flamethrower bug. But instead of just my sharpshooters and flamethrowers with no ammo, all of my forces had zero ammo loadouts, so I had to fight morse hand to hand while his troops had ammunition. A very nasty job.

Roight, then there were the issues of the Mac vs PC that came into play. I was playing on a Mac, then on a PC and everyone knows what happens when that occurs. Sheer pandemonium.

After that, I got distracted with the blasts from the CHURCHILL AVRE which were so small I couldn't believe it. That wasted 3 of my precious turns alone.

Then, what followed was a guessing game that morse created. He sent me a picture of my tank blowing up and asked me to identify what it was, as a sort of new CM game, that took another 3 turns and distracted me.

Lastly, it was clear that JDMorse is a cheater. I should have known from the start. Regardless of the fact that I asked for Heavy Fog, Nighttime and Wet conditions, I ended up with Clear, Day and Dry conditions. Even though I could have discussed all of this prior to the game, I thought he was reading my mind on what I wanted for a setup. This is an obvious breach of honor on his part and totally unacceptable.

Now, with that being said, I'll lose, and Morse is still an ass. That will make me 1-1 vs morse, but in the next match, I'll beat him like a red headed step-Bauhaus.

For all of you other bottom dwellers out there, as much as this pains me, have a Happy Holiday Season.

Also, I'd like to throw my contribution into the hat for the next name on the Peng Thread, aka, Mutha Beautiful Thread.

Peng's Heroe's

Jimmy cracked a Peng and I don't care.

That should about cover it, I've chosen one from a movie and one from a song.

All of you may carry on now.

GI Tom

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To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of wierd sandwich.

[GI Tom]

Move along, my first ever dbl post.

GI Tom

[This message has been edited by GI Tom (edited 12-22-2000).]

[Hiram Sedai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by GI Tom:

Move along, my first ever dbl post.

GI Tom

[This message has been edited by GI Tom (edited 12-22-2000).]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Ha ha! You suck.

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

[jshandorf]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

Ha ha! You suck.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Hey, Harem boy quit stealing my thunder. I don't see a little TM thingy next to that. Grrrrr... Don't make me spank you worse then I am going to spank you in our game.

Oh and Marlow... I knew the STuG was gonna die eventually just not that fast.

You Suck!

Jeff

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I once killed a six pack just to watch it die.

[Croda]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Hey, Harem boy...I don't see a little thingy...Don't make me spank you...I am going to spank you...just not that fast

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> (Edited for content)

Hmmm....somebody cue Bauhaus

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WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! -

THIS SIG FILE BELONGS TO A COMPLETE FOO.

MR T WOULDN'T BE SO KIND AS TO WRINKLE AN EYEBROW AT THIS UNFORTUNATE BEING. PLEASE OFFER HIS PARENTS AND COHABITANTS ALL SYMPATHY POSSIBLE. MAY BE CONTAGIOUS. CONTAINS ARTIFICIAL SWEETNER, INTELLIGENCE AND WIT. STAND WELL CLEAR AND LIGHT WICK. BY ORDER PETERNZ

Damn Croda. That is one funny sig!!!

must suck to be you - Hiram Sedai

[jshandorf]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda:

Originally posted by jshandorf:

Hey, Harem boy...I don't see a little thingy...Don't make me spank you...I am going to spank you...just not that fast

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> (Edited for content)

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>

Hmmm....somebody cue Bauhaus

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You a real funny guy, Croda. I'll kill you last.

Jeff

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I once killed a six pack just to watch it die.

[This message has been edited by jshandorf (edited 12-22-2000).]

[Croda]

On a side note, I'm going to tear PeterNZer limb-from-limb and reattach them in all the wrong spots and then sell him to a circus noted for mistreating its acts solely for the reason that he is making me tote this god-awful signature around everywhere I go! I swear that after I beat him, I will give him the signature from HADES!

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WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! -

THIS SIG FILE BELONGS TO A COMPLETE FOO.

MR T WOULDN'T BE SO KIND AS TO WRINKLE AN EYEBROW AT THIS UNFORTUNATE BEING. PLEASE OFFER HIS PARENTS AND COHABITANTS ALL SYMPATHY POSSIBLE. MAY BE CONTAGIOUS. CONTAINS ARTIFICIAL SWEETNER, INTELLIGENCE AND WIT. STAND WELL CLEAR AND LIGHT WICK. BY ORDER PETERNZ

Damn Croda. That is one funny sig!!!

must suck to be you - Hiram Sedai

[GI Tom]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai:

Ha ha! You suck.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Bah, I know you didn't mean that Hiram, that's just your inner croda showing off. Some people can hold their inner croda's, some can't. Tis a shame really.

GI Tom

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To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of wierd sandwich.

[dalem]

Hey-

Are Inner Crodas like Black Helicopters? So that if I don't know that I have one then obviously I do have one because it's erased all knowledge of itself from myself?

Or is that just the kind of question that a person who damned well knows what an Inner Croda is like would ask?

And what about "Go PENG Yourself"?

[Hamstersss]

Ahem.

[jshandorf]

Damn! It looks likes he isn't Polar Bear excrement after all. Oh well...

So, Meeks, rub tummies with any King Penguins?

Jeff

P.S. Send me a setup you wanna-be adventurer.

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I once killed a six pack just to watch it die.

[Moriarty]

Hey, is that Nanook Meeks, conqueror of North, South and Barber poles?

Welcome back. Mensch is currently wearing your crown.

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"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[Mark IV]

If that's really Polar-boy, be sure to follow the bouncing padlock to http://www.battlefront.com/discuss/Forum1/HTML/013701.html and read along. There's a condensed version around somewhere.

[Hamstersss]

I'll have you know that I'm eminently digestible and I'm afraid that I'm not back, Jefe, though I will be in about a month and a half. I wanted to wish everyone a spanking bright Christmas.

Notice the word wanted.

You see, while I've been gone you loony chumchucks have thrown Peng in a ditch, ran Frenchie out of town and reduced Seanachai to a four-sentence-max-posting wretch. To compound this, you have managed to create an entire fantasy world for me to occupy that consists almost but not entirely of a Polar Bear's rectum. And, AND, you moved the Cesspool to Australia. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

Short litany of questions:

1) Whatever happened to Frenchie?

2. How's this TCP/IP thing working out?

2b: Where the hell is Berli?

C What kind of silly, sing-song sonsabitches actually participate in thread-stories?

D - Does Frenchie's absence mean his woman is up for grabs?

H: Can somebody mail me a ham or a turkey or something, I'm eating peanuts, literally peanuts, over here.

You get the picture) Well that last one wasn't really a question and this one is starting to sound less and less like a question and more and more like a rambling diatribe so, is it 10 dimensions or 11?

... What crown?

.-..- ... -.- --) I never got to wear a crown.

Merry Christmas to the Cesspool, make sure you put up some lights and a wreath or something.

Gee, I wonder what my sig says...

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Meeks is correct.

-Steve, of Big Time Software, creator of Combat Mission, Vicar of Peng on Earth.

[jshandorf]

To answer your questions:

1) Whatever happened to Frenchie?

Joined a ultra nationalist movement that is plotting the destruction of all McDonalds around the world and the assassination of Ronald McDonald himself no less.

2. How's this TCP/IP thing working out?

It works. A few hiccups here and there but all in all it works just fine.

2b: Where the hell is Berli?

I have seen him.. I think. Hmmm..[scratching head] Anyone seen Beril?

C What kind of silly, sing-song sonsabitches actually participate in thread-stories?

I didn't. 'nuff said.

D - Does Frenchie's absence mean his woman is up for grabs?

In Croda's dreams. Actually she seems to be just as much AWOL as Frenchy.

H: Can somebody mail me a ham or a turkey or something, I'm eating peanuts, literally peanuts, over here.

No.

I hope it's REALLY cold.

Jeff

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I once killed a six pack just to watch it die.

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

... What crown?

.-..- ... -.- --) I never got to wear a crown.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh, you were wearing it ... the crown of magnificent looniness. It protected your noggin from the brick until Seniletea figgered out how to get around it.

Mensch found it and slipped off the deep end a while back. They've been using your brick on him but with only moderate effects. Might have to get him his own brick.

Anyway, he's got it. Dunno what you're gonna have to do to get it back. You best take that up with him.

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"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[Hiram Sedai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Ahem.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

****fire and Damnation

Meeks is back. again

I am plum tuckered suprised. Slap me around and violate my sense of decency. I am ready to call my Ex-wife and berate her for not paying more attention to the whereabouts of Elijah.

Eli, how about you and me have a little pow-wow. We both know that you will spout some nonsense about how this thread doesn't measure up to the thread you left in our hands. a little closer, Eli Here's a little secret for ya, Spankey.

We don't fricken care if your fricken boat sank on the way to frickety frick Antarctica and you had to fricken swim your way back to fricken sunny california land of the fricken lawyers.

What you need to do is send me an Alt-U and get on with your life. Get your pet chihuahua back from your gay neighbor, water your plants, and throw away the Fag City Times that collected on your doorstep while you were away.

PS Welcome back and Die Alot

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

[jdmorse]

Ahhhhh meekhamster, truly good to hear you are not yet polar bear scat. A merry Christmas to you as well. BTW Sean snatched the 'pool back from the folks down under, seems they were violationg some covenants, conditions and restrictions. One step ahead of the evictors I am afraid. A sad and pitiful chapter.

I am keeping your topplement warm and fuzzy so that upon your return I can drive the stake deeper into your sallow black french heart.

As for mensch, well bricks are bricks. Yours is reserved but we may need to increase the heft for his. Stay well so I can kill you.

JD, Esq.

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If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[This message has been edited by jdmorse (edited 12-22-2000).]

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

D - Does Frenchie's absence mean his woman is up for grabs?

In Croda's dreams. Actually she seems to be just as much AWOL as Frenchy.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Then again is ANYTHING ever what it seems

RE elusions of persecution.

The act or process of deluding.

The state of being deluded.

A false belief or opinion: labored under the delusion that success was at hand. A false belief strongly held in spite of invalidating evidence, especially as a symptom of mental illness: delusions of persecution. Sick and Sad.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Hiram Sedai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2:

Then again is ANYTHING ever what it seems

RE elusions of persecution.

The act or process of deluding.

The state of being deluded.

A false belief or opinion: labored under the delusion that success was at hand. A false belief strongly held in spite of invalidating evidence, especially as a symptom of mental illness: delusions of persecution. Sick and Sad.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Huh?

Could you just do us a favor and shake that thang??

thanks

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

[Marlow]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jdmorse:

Ahhhhh meekhamster, truly good to hear you are not yet polar bear scat. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

There is still time, and Hiram doesn't want me to change my sig. any more.

Meeks, smear some penguin guts on your head.

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This message brought to you by

Marlow's Salvage and Wrecking Service,

Proud Sponsor of The Cesspool

aka The 'Meeks currently exists as Polar Bear excrement' Memorial Thread

[Berlichtingen]

This thread almost slipped off page one... for that, you may all DIE A LOT NOW!!!

[Goanna]

I think the jack-booted bald-headed thread-locking fiend Maddmatt (and I mean that in the best of possible ways) has inadvertantly in the FAQ thread given us a winner in the name the next Peng thread challenge:

Beach Head of Cess

. . . and I kinda liked how that story was going too.

. . . so Enrique starts pulling on his head. He twists and contorts and his face then comes off. It seems it was really a well made disquise, and Enrique is really Berli in depp cover in the "real world". Berli clears his throat (evident by the puff of smoke and says, ...

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Client: "so are you a contractor or a cunsultant?"

Goanna:"Well now, that really depends on how much money you have got, doesn't it?"

[Hiram Sedai]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Goanna:

[b. . . so Enrique starts pulling on his head. He twists and contorts and his face then comes off. It seems it was really a well made disquise, and Enrique is really Berli in depp cover in the "real world". Berli clears his throat (evident by the puff of smoke and says, ...

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

...What we've got here is failure to fumigate. What the Cesspool wants, thats what it gets. I could teach you how to be a Raunchmeister, but you have to purchase the..."

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal