Slapdragon Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon: Poor Kitty, senility at your age. BTW- I am making more tank images for you, but I am waiting to see what you post.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hamster images of course Kitty. When are yours going up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by mensch: Mace thinks I'm his mom and I made him clean my room and wash the dishes twice!.. whadda sap... plus no balk talk from the lad. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Mom, where's me friggin pocket money?! And mom, when are you going to shave that beard and the legs, all me mates are talking about you saying "you ugly"!!! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Ah! Meeks is back! Welcome back, now sod off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon: Hamster images of course Kitty. When are yours going up.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I'm working on it right now!! =D Kitty ------------------ Hamsters at War! Chicks With Tanks Lorak's FTX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks: ----(___8:> <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hehe, go **** yourself. Keeping it short so as to not waste your time. Kitty ------------------ Hamsters at War! Chicks With Tanks Lorak's FTX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks: Oh it's worse than you think. There's a new sheriff in town and you'd better lock up your...kids.." What's the patch I should have? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> It figures that you would go out searching for some patch so late in life. I'm sure that the male pattern baldness makes it more difficult. Your memory sucks, your disposition sucks, and your username sucks. If I hated you before, I hate you with an exponent tacked on to it now. Do you remember the PBEM we had going on? Didn't think so. I should win by default because I deserve a fricken win by now. (damnit) Your presence is like having crotch crickets and hemoroids combined. Neither is pleasant but we haven't found an ointment to make sure you go away and stay away...yet. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 I woke the next morning, mindful of my vengeful task. I dressed quicklky, and for convenience opted for the chamelion skin dungarees, which I just happened to be sleeping in. After packing my trolley, I headed off. I prepared the first stage: I unloaded the elephant and positioned its rearward facing element toward the door of the house, and unpacked my necromantic components. All unheard or seen by the occupants (they are SO self absorbed!). The second stage was going to require exceptional timing. To this end, I had already purchased the best 4.99 digital watch I could find. Timex never fails to deliver. I pursed my lips and blew on my 'creamhorn of announcement' and waited for the response. Sure enough, out they came like a pack of hungry leprechauns, squeeling and shreeking. I quickly released the hamster which is usually caged round the back. In turn the elephant dropped its load of jelly-like deficant (I had been feeding it eels and oysters for most of the night). Just as planned all unsuspecting occupants slid into the trap, literally. While they fought to regain their footing I began to cast my spell. Using my components I majicked a thunderous quake from the depths of Valhalla. The ground opened and in they fell. As I had only completed half the spell, the hole wasn't deep. But deep enough! I thought this an opportune moment to release my bladder contents over the occupants of the hole. To my surprise some, particularly Croda, stood opened mouthed and drunk on the nectar. Well, well! I looked and laughed heartily, knowing my challenge was laid bare and obvious. Now they HAD to respond... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Is there a draft in here? Croda did you leave the front door open again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks: ...There's a new sheriff in town ...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well let's hope it's not the drunken Robert Mitchum sheriff from El Dorado. We've got plenty of worthlessness in this Pool without the added abomination of a mock authority figure with a backbone of cheesecloth. As for your triumphant return from battling legions of Wampa on the icy wastes of Hoth, let me be the first to say: "yippee." The 'Pool was doubtless lacking a certain bitterness that the Australians just couldn't manage to scrounge in their fetid outback. But if you want to be sherriff, then let me suggest that your first order of business be to throw the vagrants out of town. There are a whole load of rascals around who need to be introduced to the business end of an old-school Meeks tirade. Are you still up to it? Or does sodomizing a frozen bottle of frozen piss take the fight out of a man? So let's see you get to it! Stop dealing with the trollops and clean this place up! And you want version 1.1. And the Frenchie don't live here much no more. ------------------ WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! - THIS SIG FILE BELONGS TO A COMPLETE FOO. MR T WOULDN'T BE SO KIND AS TO WRINKLE AN EYEBROW AT THIS UNFORTUNATE BEING. PLEASE OFFER HIS PARENTS AND COHABITANTS ALL SYMPATHY POSSIBLE. MAY BE CONTAGIOUS. CONTAINS ARTIFICIAL SWEETNER, INTELLIGENCE AND WIT. STAND WELL CLEAR AND LIGHT WICK. BY ORDER PETERNZ Damn Croda. That is one funny sig!!! must suck to be you - Hiram Sedai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kitty: Hehe, go --Expletive Snipped-- Kitty <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Kitty was referring to Elijah's Hermaphroditic physical atributes. He alone can do what Kitty was suggesting. He used to do it on the streets for pocket change but he was too much of a flop in San Fransisco. Elijah has since taken up juggling balls of Great Dane droppings and piercing his sack to amuse the kids. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lorak: Hiram... Down here hospitality is hospitality. (that or the fact that they are amazed that people have actualy learned the art of reading.) Lorak the loathed <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Lorak, you feeble minded George Strait sycophant: I was the victim of that hospitality when I lived in Georgia for 5 years. I think Columbus, GA had one rock station and the rest was country. Win Dixies and Waffle Houses dotted the landscape. I'm sure they have a profound respect for a wargamer down there. Give Betty Lou Anderson a friendly pinch the next time you see her. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GI Tom Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Ahhh..it feels good to be back..back to where my cup overfloweth with cess. A few points of interest for you fellow, pitiful excuses of human beings. Firstly, of great importance, Berli the Evil Flameboy is suffereing dramatically in our game and I do actually believe I'm going to beat the peckerhead, finally. I think the realization should just about be sinking in for him right about now as I sploded' his Hetzer with my jolly green sherman giant. Ahh, it does feel good to be on top. (Sit down Bauhaus)I expect his surrender shortly after I waste his last HT. So Lorak, fire up the ol' abacus and get ready to slide a ball (sit down again Bauhaus) over to my side. Also, speaking of Lorak, I'd like to actually take a moment and break cesspool tradition to thank you for that wonderful site you posted with the radio station. Even in your grotesque ugliness and questionable existance, you managed to prove that even ugly, unworthy people as yourself have useful purposes. Now that you've been properly thanked, go back down into your hole and resume counting up our scores. Also, I'd like to point out an obvious fact that the greatness called the Oakland Raiders are going to win the Big One. I've kept amazingly quiet during all this garbagy (I just made that word up) Eagle/Giant talk. It never really mattered who won as the Glorious Raiders shall be going to Disneyworld shortly. 24 years I've been a Raiders Fan. 24 long years. 1983 was the last Superbowl. It is time for them to rise above the rest finally. So, similar to the colors of this cesspool, silver and black is back! Lastly, I will be finding myself shorthanded of games again, therefore I need a little CM PBEM stepchild to pound on. I shall have to taunt one of thee here shortly. Standby for that, as I'm at work and actually have to take a call. You may now all resume with your regularly scheduled programs. GI Tom ------------------ To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Oberst Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by stevetherat: buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... buzz... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Meeks, goddammit!! You brought one of those pesky gigantic Artic flies back with you!! We will have to appropriate the MASK OF BEES, rile them up a bit, and get them to dispose of this stevetherat via repeated stingings on his dangly bits until they swell large enough that we can fill them with helium, let him float up a few thousand feet, then take target practice with our Flak 88 until he falls speeding to the ground, impacting at terminal velocity and mercifully burying himself at the same time. Perhaps then we can have some peace and quiet around here and get back to the matters at hand. SIT DOWN BAUHAUS! AND ZIP UP FER PETE'S SAKE! KITTY DOESN'T WANT TO SEE YOUR VIENNA SAUSAGE!!! ------------------ To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee... [This message has been edited by Herr Oberst (edited 01-10-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wildman Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 and the Meeks shall inherit the....CESS?? Those posts have to be the most sorry excuse for rants I have seen, well since mine. You may have been a large piece of turd in the infancy of the cesspool, but now you are but one more disgusting piece of phlegm to be flicked off a best and ignored at worst. I mean really why not just say "Your mother wears combat boots!" Your something else as mild as your first posts. I can understand what happened, you too have spent time in the great White north, where the deer and the antelope play. The inability to function when the temperature never rises above zero can shake a man, boy, sissy whatever category you fit in, if your not ready for it. Now that your "twig and berries" have frozen and fallen off, maybe you can borrow stevetherats until you get your *thingy* enhancement surgery scheduled. I can't believe the CessPool will even sink low enough to accept a...a...raider fan. Oh the whore of it all, the agony, the sheer myopia of it all. So GI TOM we now know you play CM in your Darth Raider gear, with the spiked shoulder pads and the vacant look in your eyes. I would rather be a 1-15 Chargers fan than even watch a Raider game. So maybe when you show up a Jack Murphy again you too can be involved in one of the seven to eight fights in the stands. Only this time try and be a man about it and leave the knives and guns home in your barrio. On the game front. Croda and I have finished the setup and I fully expect to win, (giving Croda his first zoomie), unless my opponent show any tactical ability whatsoever, in which case I will get my "rod and tackle" severed and handed to me. I will then complain about how lucky Croda is and how under clear skies and dry ground with multiple fighter-bombers I would have won. --- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hakko Ichiu Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 I see Meeks has returned. Never send a polar bear to do a fecking flamethrower's job. Prof. Doktor Hamster X Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nijis Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Some grim news from the front. Having somehow switched my tanks' ammo loads for shipments of rubber-coated Play-Shells, the lawyer formerly known as Morse has did indeed mop up the last surviving remnants of my forces, and is now cheerfully violating the Geneva Convention. Marpits meanwhile continues to roll up my line after having unhinged it by means of that notoriously cheap and gamey tactic, the flanking maneuver. But all is not lost. PeterNZ is now one Panther short of a Pair O' Panthers. And Cruddy the Ruddy Duck-Chucker has at last given up his fruitless assault on my hilltop position and is waddling off to obloquy. Mr. Lorak, if you please, take note! ------------------ "I can't listen to music too often... It makes me want to say kind, stupid things, and pat the heads of people... But now you have to beat them on the head, beat them without mercy." V. I. Lenin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I/O Error Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 *UPGRADING TO VERSION 1.1* The dangers: (Ah c'mon, somebody laugh. Just a chuckle. Anything. Please...?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 I/O Error wrote: > Ah c'mon, somebody laugh. Top marks for effort. Now get lost, I'm pissed off because I spent an hour writing a masterful retort to Jeff Heidman in the Mac thread last night only to find that Steve had locked it. > Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 What a waste of my precious time this has become. Where are the threats? The mindless violence? The evil that lurks in the hearts of hamsters? The ones keeping up the bad work are few and far between indeed. And don't tell me I should "do somefink aboot it" either. I have never been any good at writing stuff, I am only here to beat you all in CM. Check my record if you don't believe me. This is silly so stop whatever it is you're planning to write as I don't give a flying psychotic feck either way anymore . Mace, is it your only purpose in this thread to suck up to Kitty? We don't suck up here, remember? There are other places for that. American football, who cares? I stopped caring about that sport years ago, so can you. (Anyway, the Eagles had their chance way back when they had Randall Cunningham and Reggie White in the team and what did they do? Hire Buddy Ryan as coach. Good job. The sport is so obviously down the drains, I mean the Saints went to the playoffs? The only reason I dug them was because they would never win anything, nor would the Bengals.) And now Meeks is back, hooray. After anchoring just off Newfoundland he watched porno vids for a few months and now he's back. How wonderful. In ongoing graves: Prof Dr Hamster X (whose captives name DOES sound like a sneeze, who woulda thunk Joe Squaw would be right about anyfink?): I really admire this guy, I really do. Playing him is a bit like playing Berli, he's not necessarily out to win, in his case he just likes to blow things up. Whether it's his own things or not does not matter as long as he gets lots of pwetty splosions. Our sick, twisted version of Fertile Ground reminds me of The Hacky Sack of Krakow, one of the Old Firms finer moments. Germanboy: I probably don't have a chance. I dunno if we can talk about this one yet, but he will beat me. Just kidding. He's deader than a doornail. Moriarty: Just started. See above (the deader than a doornail part). Piotr of NZ: I gotta upgrade first. He's dead too. Sod off, every single one of you (except the ones who slunk in, I want nothing to do with them and they are not even worthy of my scorn) ------------------ Johan "The succesful execution of a well devised plan often looks like luck to saps." Dashiell Hammett Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamstersss Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Look Kitty, I like you, I really do. Eventually you'll be responsible for CM3's modeling of realistic lemming mating calls. It's not that your posts are short, if that were the case I'd yell at Berli and he'd subsequently tear my living heart out and feed it the the thousand flesh-eating rapier beetles that follow him just for such a purpose. I wouldn't want that, no not at all. It's because you post so damn many of those little things, that's why. Regardless, I'm sure you've been doing it due to Pool atrophy and I'm just trying to gently curb your bad habits. The same cannot be said for the two morons, wildman and stevetherat. Wildman first, as he's attacked Raider fans and therefor proven himself to be a sissy in real life. The Raiders rock, they're going to the Superbowl and I've got season tickets so I get to see them. In fact, I'm going to the AFC Championship game this weekend you sad little soccer fan. Just because we beat down and piss on opposing fans doesn't make us bad, it just makes us interesting. As to your comments about my genitalia, do a search. You will find this subject has been covered by people much sexier and much more Scottish than yourself. I'm sure you made other comments, as you seem to be the annoying and long-winded type, but I didn't read them for fear that mine own eyes would rebel against my brain for forcing upon them such tripe and hogwash. The most harmless second, that being the neo-beatnick stevetherat. I've tried to read some of his mind-numbingly boring posts and can only assume the poor bastard thinks himself to be a writer or, at least, an avid reader of porn. What little I've managed to read before finding something more interesting (Such as the, laugh-riot by comparison, Study of the Mating Habits of the Oak Tree in its original Esperanto) seems to be about a homosexual man and his dog, as they try to buy or maybe eat(?) Croda and some house in the woods. Stevetherat has a promising career ahead of him as an Iggles fan or a Republican pundit. ------------------ The Thin Red Line doesn't deserve to lick the sweat from my balls let alone demand the cash I would lay down for the DVD version. Seesh. The movie was lame-o! With a capital Hiram. -Shandorf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wildman Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Apparently Meeks is also a myopic, (that's a fancy word for obsessed, Meeks), Raider fan. Who after many years have finally seen what the AFC Championship looks like. The only reason you got this far is the lack of competion in your Division. I mean GAWD, my Chargers were 1-15, no wonder you happened to stumble onto a winning record. Now you'll actually face a team with a decent defense, and I can't wait to hear the moans (down baushous) of the Raider faithful come Monday. As for genitalia I cannot believe anyone, even the Scottish would find them, interesting. Disgusting, non-existent, but never sexy or interesting. --- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lorak: In other news... I am really ashamed at the whole lot of you. It seems that none of you have been man enough or foolish enough to taunt Fionn into a game yet. Speedy's attempt feel way short. Hell that attempt wouldn't even get a game from me. But he at least he had the gonads to try. Keeping the thread alive Lorak the loathed <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Lorak, It was not fear that kept me from responding, instead I just thought that the "Fionn" challenge was more than likely a manifestation of your schizoPengia rather than a real offer for a martial contest. However, even assuming that it wasn't just your mad ramblings, so friggin what if Fionn wants a game; even if it was Patton himself, there are still forms to be observed. If he wants a game from the 'Pool, he has to come a-tauntin (obviously through his you, his Medium) like anyone else, and none of this "oooh … ooooh … I challenge you all!!!!" crap either, but a suitable personal affront. Why in Berli's name would I try to taunt him, or even acknowledge his existence without receiving a suitable invitation to battle that either makes my eyes bulge in righteous fury, or makes me fall out of my chair laughing. In fact I am deeply disappointed in Speedy for replying to Fionn's feeble attempt. And I don't want to be hearing any "Oh, but its Fionn, he is soooooo good that the normal rules don’t apply" bull****. We all know that actual CM ability has nothing to do with the 'Pool, as is evidenced by a number of the current inmates of the Schloss Peng. However, if I were to receive a appropriate invitation to battle, I might just be able to open a spot on the ol' schedule and squeeze him in. ------------------ This message brought to you by Marlow's Salvage and Wrecking Service, Proud Sponsor of The Cesspool formerly The 'Meeks currently exists as Polar Bear excrement' Memorial Thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Actually Meeks was at his most useful when posting outside the pool, startling and annoying the Very Serious posters in grogland. This was the only thing he was ever better at than me, aside from providing roughage for polar recta. Is WildMAN still appropriate, really, under the (ahem) abbreviated circumstances? WildTHING is much too grandiose for such a minor annoyance; perhaps just Eunuch? And... Croda's just another word, for nothin' left to lose... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamstersss Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Wildman: Sniffle.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yes, much like myself, the Raiders have been gone for a while and they're back. Also much like myself, they will now commence to kick ass for years to come. Granted some of you imbeciles find football boring and to you I say, "You're a moron." but I will not belabor this point. Tell me something Wildman, when do you plan on posting something witty or barbed? When are you going to tell me that you will destroy me so utterly that my children will be taunted at school. When will you manage to move past the cock jokes, the mama jokes and the old-line, "Your football team sucks!" jokes and move into the realm of true, biblical taunting? I ask you sir, what is your ETA on posting something even remotely interesting to read? I would like to know because every time I am forced to scan your posts for material, my entire existence sighs and wishes that my trilobite ancestors never developed optical nerves. Every time I think about what you say, my synapses shrivel with disgust. You are not annoying nor are you stupid, rather you are the worst thing a person could be in the Pool, you are boring. Every fiber of my being wishes that you would be hit by a car full of Catholic schoolgirls with Louisville sluggers, who would proceeed to beat you to death after running you over so that, when asked by other members of the Pool, "What happened to Wildman?" I can answer, "He was run over by a car full of Catholic schoolgirls and then beaten to death." and you will have brought me an iota of enjoyment in exchange for all the pain your terrible dumbness has caused me. ------------------ The Thin Red Line doesn't deserve to lick the sweat from my balls let alone demand the cash I would lay down for the DVD version. Seesh. The movie was lame-o! With a capital Hiram. -Shandorf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted January 10, 2001 Share Posted January 10, 2001 Elijah Meeks wrote: > Granted some of you imbeciles find football boring Not boring – are you suggesting that the average football fan has a quantifiable attention span? It's just exciting, and... not much else. Canned excitement. For people without memories or even a thought in their little heads. > and to you I say, "You're a moron." May I return the compliment. Now sod off back to whatever pole you came from, and this time don't forget to break through the ice and take a nice long bath in the lovely warm water. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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