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TAKING THE BLOODY PENG THREAD DOWNUNDER


Mace

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Ack! You fruitcake! That gives me just 25 minutes to leave work, get home, download the patch, create a second instance of CM on my 'puter, install the patch, and then meet you in the chat room. You flippin' loony? I am not superman though my GF tells me so. Heh heh.

Make is 18:00 hrs EST.

If you bore me I will have my dog Hogan take over the controls, whilst I drink a beer and watch some History Channel.

Jeff

[This message has been edited by jshandorf (edited 11-29-2000).]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

18:00 is 6:00 PM, ya bonehead. Way to be wimpy. How about 2000 hours?

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

Did I see that the Greeks had finally arrived?

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

To the sum of one for the moment, but I'm working on it.

I am fuming, the freaking Win2k laptop of mine is completely and utterly moronic and refuses to TCPIP. So today is crap, poo, ****e... But I got a PBEM surrender!

Now I know you don't care, you don't give a toss, you hate my guts etc etc, but I need to get that cuddly feeling of being abused.

A PBEM setup would nicely do. Verbal abuse is OK too.

frown.gif Freaking smilies, lame emoticons.

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I feel like I'm standing in front of the monkey cage at the zoo. - HiramS

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by M. Bates:

There are probably many people who read this thread and who once in a while want to contribute. This thread is subject to the same forum rules as any other.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

This is a fine example of what's wrong with America, Britain, the Internet, and the Newtonian view of the Universe.

You sniveling little parvenu, do you want to parade your little placard here for your rights? You think you have made a contribution to anything, anywhere?

This forum is exempt, do you hear me, by special dispensation of Pope Steve himself, from your stupid bourgeois "rules". And your schoolboy washroom humor. And the close female relative you rode in on.

You don't have a right to be here, and if you did we would revoke or ignore it anyway. Your silly whining about every imagined crime and bug in CM is truly topped by this exercise in self-righteousness. This is a PRIVATE club in a public place and there's nothing you can do about it. You don't have what it takes- you're not our sort- or in the perceptive words of a previous commentator, you SUCK. You are the king of SUCK.

So purse your prim little lips around this, nancy-boy: you were an object of scorn and derision even before showing up here. The most pitiful whiners, thrill-seekers, and soap-box preachers to stop by the Cesspool for their 15 seconds of shame have shown more gumption than you have.

"Wah-wah, I'm gonna tell, I have rights, I have something to say..." You disgust me. I won't rip your guts out because they'd soil the Cesspool, and even the rats would wrinkle their little noses in disgust at your spineless offal. Just post a few more snippy and witless observations, get bored, and leave. Yecchh.

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M.Bates, may your name never be spoken in this thread again. For each time it is, your right hand increases tempo and you are going to do yourself an injury. Sod off and soil someone elses thread you snivelling Tory.

Thats the business taken care of, now down to the juicy stuff.

Mensch Hahahaaa, I laff in your general direction you misbegotten lover of other people's pets. Your mighty Tiger sqaudron has been wittled down to one....hohoho..how pleased you were to see my AT gun, how you crowed that christmas had come early with so many presents for you to destroy....'till that AT gun blew your freak'in head off that is! Now your last Tiger simpers forwards, its crew strangely quiet, with their saucer shaped eyes pressed to the vision slits while their testicles withdraw into their abdomens.

OGSF My topplement is now complete to the tune of 19-81. Not so bad really considering our last game left me on a 9. Therefore a 214% increase in productivity has me quite cheerful. The champagne is flowing in Berlin tonight!

Peng Yes you'll get your surrender sometime soon, right after the court martial and public execution of every last mother sucking one of my troops. Nuff said.

Mace Your fascination with the large hills and their resemblence to the female anatomy leads me to believe I will find all your men suckling greedily at the pinnacles of said hills.

Blousemouse Yes I did forget we were fighting as infantry only. Possibly something to do with the two ice ages that passed between the set up and return of your first file?

Crowduck Surrender now girly-boy and save my heroic frenchies the bother of sniffling around in this fog. Thank you so much.

Kitty Come to papa, little one. Uncle Stucky has a nasty surprise for your troops.

Anyone else I've forgotten? Yes? Well 'Blow me!'

No Bauhaus, I was speaking figuratively! No bauhaus! Stop it! No! Stop! Arrrghhhh!

------------------

Torture you? That...That's a good idea.

[This message has been edited by Stuka (edited 11-29-2000).]

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Ahhhhh.. The feeling of victory....

"Why does he say that?" You ask yourself, no?

Because I just STOMPED Hiram into the ground. Even though my stupid Sherman and bazooka teams were worthless my infantry shined the way to his innards and I gutted Hiram with a spoon. His men were like baby harp seals. Oh, how I clubbed the helpless little creatures as Hiram the mother sat by powerless to stop me. Sigh...

And oh yes... TCP/IP rocks!

Now I must go and bask in my glory....

Did I mentioned he surrendered? Muahahahaha!

Jeff

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

Not as surprised as you'll be, mate!

He is really a she (albut with very sharp claws)!

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Really? I was aways worried about that. Hope she is duly insulted though.

[This message has been edited by Bastables (edited 11-29-2000).]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bastables:

Burp![This message has been edited by Bastables (edited 11-29-2000).]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Blusterboils! Is that really you? About our game....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!

Speedy Now *that* was funny!!! Your Combined Arms attack on my poor infantry is smashed to bits, but then to top it off and for my eternal amusement, you drop 105mm VT on your own men instead of smoke! I bet the boys are just dying to be in *your* army!

M.Bates Sod off, you are a whining little twat who needs a good seeing to by a randy Rottwheiler.

Hey Speedy, Hahahahahahaha!

OberGrupenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastard

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bastables:

Really? I was aways worried about that. Hope she is duly insulted though.

[This message has been edited by Bastables (edited 11-29-2000).]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I think playing you would be insult enough! wink.gif

Mace

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai:

Did I see that the Greek had finally arrived?

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Bouillé,

All these tigers which, without pity, Déchirent the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yes! Yes!! YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!

Now everybody gather up and witness that simple but oh so touching endorsement.

After gazillions of postings with his Celtophilic sig, the Seanachai of Minnesotan Fame comes back with a BabelFished Marseillaise.

The Marlow Dance Remix of our French National Anthem...

What does it teach us?

Being French is the spearheading of Fashion Victim.

Not only do we have a GO KILL THEM ALL thingy we can yell before every rugby match but it's quite buggering other countries for they are required to play it when our President is on a World Tour.

And boy the guy sure does the Touring...

Now listen up you sycophants, morons, non-french and whatever else.

I'll make it simple because I know some of you are basically americans and the rest are ozzers.

What Senility just told you in so many words is the way things are supposed to be.

A few days ago when Lost2Peng was still sulking from that vile attack launched against him without prior TCP/IP warning, some mails were exchanged and the Ways of the Pool were much discussed.

I'll do a simple cut & paste of one such mail for all of you who weren't on the mailing list.

The only thing that will be proven here is that I'm too lazy to come up with new ideas and that I'm far too infatuated with my own postings for my own good.

In any case, as the Bald One would say, BITE ME!!!

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>

Blah Blah Blah Young & Restless style plot Blah Blah Thank you.

Well.

Thank you yourself. You started the Pool in any case, it's your baby while it is

merely our toy.

As any form of intellectual property and as a bond to an ever growing and petulent community, the Thread and you are prone to attacks, bashing, public lynching, turkeys sacrificial pagan ceremonies and eventually french posting.

That’s the ONLY thing those Newbies can't seem to understand.

It's not a ****ing free forum.

It's not a Taunt'O'Drome.

It's a place where we have grown to know each others and where the level of sheer brilliance and intellectual panache is very demanding (from now on I'll shorten "sheer brilliance and intellectual panache" into "Frenchness" for typing user friendliness).

That was the goal of my puny little Groucho Marx quoting.

If we are not better, if they are not better, then we don't belong.

CM is the greatest game of all times.

Last time I had that much pleasure playing alone was related to that Biblical guy, Onan...

But CM is a mere media, it's what caused it...

Here is a lazy Cut & Paste {BOY I DO THEM QUITE OFTEN ACTUALLY} of what I answered to Aitken's invective in the Famed sexually tilted PawBroon thread started by Emma.

_____________________________________________

Originally posted by David Aitken:

Oops, I thought this was a forum about a wargame.

Nope.

All wrong.

If you are just in it for that then you're missing much of the fun...

The game was discussed.

Then the demo was released.

The game was cursed.

Then the CD was sent (well, OK not to you Canadians).

Then the game was cursed again.

Tweaked, cursed, tweaked, cursed and then quite perfect.

In that long and winding road some friendships were made.

Some people are plain assholes.

Some are cool.

Some I'd be willing to count as friends.

But by and large, we are ALL talking about CM.

Because what makes this place is not the game, it's the people.

If you can't get past that simple notion then I must agree with a late post of yours.

Scotland's educative system IS in shamble...

_____________________________________________

So I guess even if it was so very schmaltzy, it pretty much sums up what the Pool is to me and to some others.

It has carried you through months of unemployement.

It may even have helped you go through you're failed sex life (the dates you mention here and there...).

biggrin.gif

Damn you Sean if you EVER touched while thinking of one of my posts...

That's pretty much it.

Most of us Elders are back to post in the Pool.

A full round of tauntings had been done that hadn't happened before (I've never played Chup, MkIV and Geier before) and with the playing will come our natural tendency to taunt and to be harsh.

We will have to be ever watchfull though.

The next Cesspoolnarok will be here before Xmas and with the Next Gen, a new batch of wannabes will pour down.

Those will not all be like Marlow or Croda, so we will have to careful.

Being a Taunt Thread, my best bet is to play along the rude act and plainly ignore those if they are just bringing in their Genitalia.

With us French, there is enough of that for the whole lot of you...

We are gifted bastards.

biggrin.gif

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

That's it.

With almost 6000 posts credited to the Peng Thread in any shape or form, what it is NOW is far more than you can just merely glimpse by posting here and there and most generally waste your time and hassle our patience.

And YES Seanachai, the Greek is here.

Being famed for circumnavigating people and posting behind theirs backs, ColeSlaw has backyarded us all...

------------------

IP# 193.253.181.227

[This message has been edited by PawBroon (edited 11-30-2000).]

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*OberGrupenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastard takes another swig from the bottle of Famous Grouse and lurches towards Pawbroom*

*sniff* "I love you, man!"

*The embrace of comrades*

"Ah feck! The French bastard tried to kiss me!!"

*Obie pulls back and swings at the leering French mongrel with his empty bottle of Famous Grouse - misses by three feet - and continues to spin under the momentum. He collapses into the dishevelled pile of tattered rags from whence he had risen up*

"Buuuuurp!"

*OGSF dozes off. Pawbroom wanders away looking for another matey to kiss on the cheeks*

[Lights fade, curtain closes. End scene]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bauhaus:

Speaking of Aussies that are just a weee bit slower than the average folk. I mean that is what this thread is about. Any way, Stuka (pommie) and I finally got our game underway, at least I did my part. Purchased troops and the initial set up. Stuka had purchased his troops in a battle that was to feature no armor. So what did he do? Purchased armor. No wonder he can't get out of his squire status. Moriarty, could you please help this young lad out. Teach him the difference between armor and infantry. DOH!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Anything for you Bauhaus, ol' buddy.

Now, young Squire Stuka ... I trust you know the difference between armor and infantry, but in case you don't, lemme s'plain somefink to you. Armor gots the big tubes. Infantry gots the li'l ones.

Now, let us address in all seriousness this breech of etiquette re this little mixup about you takin' armor in an infantry game ...

Stuka me boy, go kick the snot out of the fargin' icehole sumnabatchin basteech Blousemouse. Big tubes, little ones let 'im have it. Blood and gore, Stuka. Blood and gore. HIS. Blow his little bits to littler bits. He lost to me 98-2. There's your mark. I expect, nay, demand 99-1.

Muahahahahaahaha

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"I came to Casablanca for the waters."

[This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 11-30-2000).]

[This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 11-30-2000).]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OGSF:

*OGSF dozes off. Pawbroom wanders away looking for another matey to kiss on the cheeks*<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I did say it was schmaltzy...

Now everybody bunch up and we'll all do the corporate hug.

* Support group like grin *

For the rest of you, go fondle with your IP ports.

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IP# 193.253.181.227

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon:

For the rest of you, go fondle with your IP ports.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm not sure if you're occasionally brilliant, or occasionally lucky. In posting, that is.

Since I appear to be MISSING A TURN, and assume that you're now so enamored of real-time suicide that you no longer need ME as a sword to fall upon, you can just load up poor old 1.05 one last time, and press Alt-U, making my swiftest victory ever.

I think de Maupassant wrote about this syndrome once, called something like "The Duel", wherein our hero, presented with the fatal challenge, ultimately commits suicide as the dawn of the fateful day rises. His imagination did him in before the duel ever took place.

Now you have gone this rascal one better in actually showing up (and well before dawn, as we can only see about 54m). And the beautiful night pyrotechnics are nearly as brilliant as de Maupassant himself, one of France's best reasons for existing.

But the screams in the dark, your flaming hulks, the flash of my spotting rounds, and the utter lack of damage to my forces, must be working on your delicate psyche by now, and I find you chatting here in the cafe, instead of at your station of honor.

I implore monsieur to take one of the only two honorable courses. You must point the pistol at one of the parties (that would be me, or YOU) and pull the trigger. I shall personally return your moustache to your next of kin; I shall consider it an honor. Bon soir.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Moriarty:

I expect, nay, demand 99-1.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

99-1? Yes my lord, no worries. A piece of Pelican piss to be precise.

Not only shall I turn Blousey's little bits into littler bits, I will atomise them and scatter them to the winds so that each and every one of will inhale these atoms.

These atoms will permeate from the bronchial tubes of all of you, to the outer epidermal layer where they will divide and form,divide and form, until all of you are covered in full size bauhaus bits.

Every morning as you peer bleery eyed into the bathroom mirror you will be horrified to see another fresh crop of bauhaus bits has formed on your noses during the night. Of course you will squeeze bauhaus' bits onto the mirror in true teenager fashion (I mean, who wants to go to work with a set of dangle berries hanging from their chin?)

Larger ones will form on your backs where you can't quiiiiiite reach them while an especially irritating specimen will pop out between your arse-cheeks at an important meeting so you have to sit still and put up with it.

Every moment of your collective infestations will serve to remind you of the utter devastation brought upon the artist formally known as Bauhaus by the Squire "Flash as a rat with a gold tooth" Stuka.

And my Knigget will be proud as punch.

------------------

Torture you? That...That's a good idea.

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace:

Good! I can show you what else I can do with a cricket bat.....now bend over!

Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

g'day mate!

ooh you would like that ey? you been hanging around the barn to much be boy... those cows, sheep and anything with legs have that terror look when you enter bat or no bat...

have fun with open field of nothingness between you and me.. hmm maybe we can re-enact the charge of the light brigade...this time it will be more like charge of the sheep brigade.

good thing your english cuz everyone knows Aussi's are just reject English people.. same crooked teeth big ears and a fondness for farm animals.

toodlery too!

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Now,

This is low.

I am writing this post on my palm, while running downtown London dressed just in cK Eternity, *huff puff*, evading tackling bobbies and blocking bag-wielding touristos. (that's London, UK, to you geography-illiterate self-centred Americanos and Ozzies, yes, the city where Harrods and Madame Tussauds is!)

Yes, I resorted to streaking *gasp* (and that's a bad sight, believe me), cause I started a bloody AI game last night. The last time I was that pathetic I was in high-school... So:

SEND A BLOODY SETUP.

At least one of you pathetic lot must be mano enough to stop turning their back to me and send the blooming file over! Can I also point out that it is totally idiotic to turn your back on a Greek man. You might get more than what you asked for! Think, is this what your mothers (had you not been the sad product of self-replicating wormlike protozoa) would like you to do?

Elate minares na sas kseskisw ta prekia!!!

"Taxi, taxi, *gasp*, anyone, I wanna go home and play the feking AI!

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I feel like I'm standing in front of the monkey cage at the zoo. - HiramS

[This message has been edited by a pathetic AI playing git (edited 11-30-2000).]

[This message has been edited by coralsaw (edited 11-30-2000).]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Shandorf:

Ahhhhh.. The feeling of victory....

"Why does he say that?" You ask yourself, no?

Because I just STOMPED Hiram into the ground. Even though my stupid Sherman and bazooka teams were worthless my infantry shined the way to his innards and I gutted Hiram with a spoon. His men were like baby harp seals. Oh, how I clubbed the helpless little creatures as Hiram the mother sat by powerless to stop me. Sigh...

And oh yes... TCP/IP rocks!

Now I must go and bask in my glory....

Did I mentioned he surrendered? Muahahahaha!

Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

It autosurrendered for me. But it was a good game and I learned alot.

Final Score 72-28 IIRC. My tactic of bunching all of my infantry in one building did NOT work. Neither did my tactic of driving my tank as fast as I can past a couple of buildings to shoot at some empty ones.

I hate you Shandorf. I hope your lower lip falls off and you'll be forced to smile at the neighbor kids for the rest of your life and they will poop in your bushes on your front lawn and tye signs around your dog's neck that says "Shandorf smells like frumunda cheese".

------------------

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

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*sigh*

I really hope this is the only time I have to do this...

[seriousMode]

My dear, Seanachai. Concerning your latest post: we know that, the veterans that is. I suppose that assumes that the few months that I've been here would qualify me for veteran status. Anyway, I think that most people understand that this thread is a fantastic synergetic community. The more that people contribute, the more fun it becomes. From my infancy back towards the middle of the 1st incarnation of the thread, I remember that the lifeblood of the community was the playful hatefullness that spewed forth from everyone. We all knew that nobody actually detested the other posters (with the rare exception), but it didn't have to be said. Each poster had a voice that everyone knew, and each voice was of as little consequence as the one before it, and therefore all voices counted equally, and each derisive post was one-uped before everyone even had a chance to read it. In short, it was a sort of intellectual nirvana where a group of people were able to transcend international and cultural boundaries and share their similar senses of humor against the backdrop of a fantastic war simulator. What could be more perfect?

The post has changed somewhat since then, and I think that Cesspoolnarock I was the catalyst. It has become more of a jolly meeting place. And while that alone is not a horrible thing, it does have it's problems. The thread fills up quicker now. High quality posts are buried beneath mounds of drivel. More and more people post who have no games being played within the community (and wasn't that the original basis of the community?) Perhaps we should embrace the change. Perhaps we should enjoy the natural evolution and transmogrification of the thread into whatever it becomes. Perhaps the guy who wrote La Marseillese is dying all over again after seeing that Babelfish translation. And perhaps Meeks got eaten by a Polar bear.

Regardless, I enjoy greatly the meanspirited nature of the thread. I have had to stifle laughing aloud at work and at home at some of the wittiest writings I've ever read (and having a degree in English, I've read quite a bit). This Thread is a sociological and anthropological goldmine! An international community with a single common foundation creating its own unspoken ettiquete, mythos, language, hierarchy, and dare I say some things close to friendships with people whom we will most likely never speak to or set eyes on. This believe it or not, is a wonder of the modern world, and what Al Gore envisioned the internet to be when he created it in his basement (sorry, couldn't resist). Bottom line: I like it here, and I don't want to see it fade away because all the quality posters get annoyed with the drivel posters and go elsewhere. So there you have it. [/seriousMode]

In other news, I was playing TCP/IP last night and didn't get to any of your damned files. If that bothers you, take a piece of plywood, grab it with both hands in front of you and repeatedly smash yourself about the head with it until you can come up with something else to worry about. The files will go out sooner rather than later. I also owe setups to MarkyMarkIV and MaceBoy. This gets me close to 25 games...oh lord.

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"THAT DUCK SHALL NOT HAVE DIED IN VAIN!"

- Senachai

[This message has been edited by Croda (edited 11-30-2000).]

[This message has been edited by Croda (edited 11-30-2000).]

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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Croda:

Hiram, you rat bastard...no more quarter for those troops of yours hiding in the woods afraid to come and get me! They shall all Die A Lot Soon!

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

How soon? Cro-Diddly? Give me a time. Did ya download the patch yet, Professor? Hmm??

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Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal

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