37mm Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Yeah, surprising Boo by opening up with my four Heavy machine guns AFTER his bombardment had finished was fun... for a while anyway... he still seems to have gotten some of his men disturbingly close to my trench. I expect the last few turns will be messy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Originally posted by Sir 37mm: Yeah, surprising Boo by opening up with my four Heavy machine guns AFTER his bombardment had finished was fun... for a while anyway... he still seems to have gotten some of his men disturbingly close to my trench. I expect the last few turns will be messy Ya know, you wetre talking about changing your screen name not too long ago. You might consider rune2. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
37mm Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: Ya know, you wetre talking about changing your screen name not too long ago. You might consider rune2. Nah I've grown quite attached to being named after the silly doorknocker... I was only trying to change my name so as to get Joe's stinkin' knickers in a twist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Two Minnesotans walk into a pet shop near Duluth. They head to the bird section and Sven says to Ole, "Dat's dem." The owner comes over and asks if he can help them. "Yah sure, ve'll take four of dem dere little budgies in dat cage up dere." says Sven. The owner puts the budgies in a paper bag. Ole and Sven pays for the birds, leave the shop and get into Sven's pick-up and drive to the top of some big cliffs near Two Harbors. At the cliffs, Sven looks down at the 1000 foot drop and says, "Dis looks like a grand place." He takes two birds out of the bag, puts them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff. Ole watches as Sven falls all the way to the bottom, killing himself dead. Looking down at the remains of his best pal, Ole shakes his head and says: "By yumpin' yiminy, dis budgie jumping is too dangerous for me." Dere's MORE! Moments later Knute who's been to the pet shop too, arrives at the cliffs. He walks up to the edge of the cliff carrying another paper bag and a shotgun. "Hey, Ole. Vatch dis." Knute says. He takes a parrot from the bag and throws himself over the edge of the cliff. Ole watches as half way down, Knute takes the gun and shoots the parrot and continues to plummet down and down until he hits the bottom and breaks every bone in his body. Ole shakes his head and says, "And I'm never trying dat parrotshooting either." BUT VAIT!!! Dere's MORE, you betcha!! Ole is just getting over the shock of losing two friends when Lars appears. He's also been to the pet shop and is carrying a paper bag and pulls out a chicken. Lars grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it over his head, and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down and down and hits a rock and breaks his spine. Once more Ole shakes his head...."First der was Sven with his budgie jumping, den Knute parrotshooting.,.and now Lars hengliding....." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Originally posted by Noba: A used brain.That leaves out 37mm and Sticky's... those are a bit like Italian rifles, never used, only dropped once Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Lars: Lars grasps the chicken by the legs, holds it over his head, and hurls himself off the cliff and disappears down and down and hits a rock and breaks his spine.So.... Are you on the mend then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 So, it's 11 degrees Fahrenheit here. That's -11.7 degrees Celsius to you fecking Marsupials that live on the arse end of the planet. With the wind chill, it's -4 degrees, or -20 to the Southern Hemisphere Lotus Eaters who've probably never endured a temperature colder than would make them pull on a jacket. Once again, my climate is trying to kill me. And I respect that. If Australia had the 6 months of our winter, it would have separated the wheat from the chaff ages ago. Leaving an empty land haunted by the bark of the few remaining dingoes and a gentle stirring of sand as the various poisonous species came out of hiding to reclaim the pseudo-continent. I came here the other night crying out for a good pork butcher, and was subjected to a drug addict's version of 'Charlotte's Web'. Except for Lars. No matter how stupid things get, you can always trust Lars to have his eye focused on Nature, and a slow cooker. He may be brute incarnate, but he's not going to lose one drop of gravy. And I can respect him for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Tonight I've been watching a fascinating PBS program on the genetic evolution of dogs. It's made me realize that if I could properly choose, correct and reward desirable characteristics in posters, I could create a Peng Challenge Thread that is everything that a person could ever want to read. Sadly, the down-side would be posters who were hideously inbred, half-witted, near psychotic and riddled with faults. But they would exactly fit the profile, and always observe the Rules. Which would, ultimately, result in a Peng Challenge Thread that was like watching a fecking 'Best in Show' segment of Toy Poodles on parade. Joe, I'm begging you. Toss 'The Book' into the toilet. Join with me in creating a breed of Posters who are inappropriate in a way that makes them fit to post in nearly every environment. A full Profile, sure. Let no one post who's too much a fecking coward to stand up on his hind legs and howl. Rules? The simple Rule should be: Survive! Like a wolf pack, we have the simple rule of 'Coventry' to answer fools. Nae more Serfs, nae more Squires, nae more Feudalism! A certain amount of Anarchy is the basis of Change. Formalize a thing too far, and it becomes static, leaden, dead. This Thread was never meant to be the Spiritual Homeland of Intelligent Design. We are wolves. WE ARE WOLVES! We have been penned within a narrow place. Three Hundred posts and then we begin again. Let us welcome back into this little reserve a sense of wildness. Like the Goodalers, but without being so stupid and tedious. It is time to go on Walkabout. You always chide me for recruiting. But under the stars, on the brink of the Wasteland, do we simply abide? Or do we Create the World?! The Olde Ones have grown old indeed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 So, one day Lars goes out fishing with his cousin, and they really hit into them. They got some panfish, and some bass, and even an eelpout that Lars was amusing himself with, letting it wrap around his arm while he was steering the boat back to the dock, eh? And Lars says to his cousin, 'Hey, Coz, we really caught the fish there, eh? Did you mark that fishing spot, like I told you?' And his cousin told him: 'Oh, yeah. See here, I put a mark on the side of the boat right where we was catching them!' And Lars told him: 'You knob-head! How do you know we're going to get the same boat next time we go out?!' Ah, the 'Lars and his Cousin' jokes! A Minnesota tradition... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Lars: Two Minnesotans... BUT VAIT!!! Dere's MORE, you betcha!! You couldn't tell a joke if the fate of your prostate was riding on it. There's nothing worse on this planet than a Squarehead trying to tell a Squarehead joke. Horrible. It's like watching the Humor equivalent of a racist lynching... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Seanachai: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Lars: Two Minnesotans... BUT VAIT!!! Dere's MORE, you betcha!! You couldn't tell a joke if the fate of your prostate was riding on it. There's nothing worse on this planet than a Squarehead trying to tell a Squarehead joke. Horrible. It's like watching the Humor equivalent of a racist lynching... </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Posted by Seanachai. If Australia had the 6 months of our winter, it would have separated the wheat from the chaff ages ago. When our glorious continent was closer to Antarctica, the locals said. "Bugger this for a lark, we're moving north. This is too much like north 'merica! Too bloody cold". So they got to working on the program to adjust the tectonics and the glorious continent has been making considerable progress towards the equator ever since. The climate is approaching perfect and will stay that way unless you stupid northern hemisphere louts keep spewing pollution into the air. And when we finally get there, paradise will be even more perfect. We'll be far enough away from North 'merica to be able to ignore you, and basically the rest of the world as well. We will have pushed asia into siberia and have the lower half of the planet all to ourselves. Well, except for sou' 'america and sou' africa. No matter. So quit whining about how cold it is there. Put on another layer of clothes, turn up the thermostat and shut the h*ll up! Emigrate... come and join us. You know you want to. Mace will sponser you. I'll even buy you a beer. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
37mm Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Seanachai: Nae more Serfs, nae more Squires, nae more Feudalism!Seeing as THERE are NO serfs & squires (except Sturmy & he doesn't really count*) one could say we have no choice but to end feudalism... but to replace it with a weird, drunken selective breeding experiment chosen on the basis of it being “on the last TV show I watched” seems to be insanity of the highest order. I mean what if next time you watch Columbo or something & demand that everyone ask seemingly irrelevant questions to each other whilst talking about their never seen wives? Perhaps we should remember what a great man ( Peng I think) once said... “Feudalism is the worst form of thread management... except for all the others that have been tried” * He literally doesn't count... the wretched buggar is that daft... though I think I once got him to realise there was a difference between a single object & multiple objects Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Seanachai: You couldn't tell a joke if the fate of your prostate was riding on it. There's nothing worse on this planet than a Squarehead trying to tell a Squarehead joke. Horrible. It's like watching the Humor equivalent of a racist lynching... Bugger, you're right. I forgot the lovely Lena... Ole and Lena was at the kitchen table for the usual morning cup of coffee and listening to a weather report coming from the radio. "There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. All vehicles should be parked on the odd-numbered side of the streets today to facilitate snowplows," the radio voice declared. "Oh, gosh, OK," said Ole, getting up, bundling up and heading outside to dutifully put his car on the odd-numbered side of the street. Two days later, Ole and Lena were at morning coffee when the radio voice said: "There will be 2 to 4 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your vehicles on the even-numbered side of the streets." Ole got up from his coffee as before. He bundled up, shuffled off, and put his car on the even-numbered side of the street. A few days later, the couple was at the table when the radio voice declared: "There will be 6 to 8 inches of snow today and a snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the ..." Just then, the power went out. "Park it where?" Ole asked in the dark, "What should I do?" "Aw, to heck with them, Ole," Lena said, "Don't worry about it today. Just leave the car in the garage." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Seanachai: Tonight I've been watching a fascinating PBS program on the genetic evolution of dogs. It's made me realize that if I could properly choose, correct and reward desirable characteristics in posters, I could create a Peng Challenge Thread that is everything that a person could ever want to read. Sadly, the down-side would be posters who were hideously inbred, half-witted, near psychotic and riddled with faults. There you go, trying to shape the MBT (The love is baked right in!)) in your own image again! Quit trying to emulate Mary Shelley with a genetic engineering kit and an Easy Bake oven, for crying out loud! As that ancient sage, Popeye was oft quoted in saying, "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam". Who can argue with that? Better you should teach pigs to dance and Alewives to sing and healthy young Norwegian girls to give full body massages, with warm scented oils and... wait, I'll teach that last class, you deal with the fish and stuff. And remember, as you stand, facing the sun with your head to the wind, that I, Boo Radley, is... am... er... are... whatever... the person standing with you, facing what the vagaries of life will next be bringing your way. I'll be the one ready with the slap on the back, firmly affixing the little sign that says, "Kick me HARD! I'm not that bright", and I'll be the one who gives you the playful little nudge right as the bus is passing in front of you. And when asked by the authorities if I can vouch for you, I'll be the one who proudly stands up and says, "No hablo Inglés". This, you can count on. If I'm not busy doing something else, or there's something good on the tube. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Seanachai I'm afraid that you don't understand the significance of your proposal and the unintending consequences of such. Just as SOME invasions of SOME countries by SOME other countries led by SOME nitwits (I'm speaking, of course, of the invasion of Poland by Germany under the leadership of Hitler) led to unintended consequences ... Germany having a spectacularly unattractive female Chancellor, and I'm not talking about Goering ... for example, so could our renunciation of the Feudal system lead, by slow degrees or precepitously, to the utter destruction and ruination of that which we have all held so dear for so long, the Mutha Beautiful Thread. If we have anarchy ... WE HAVE NO RULES! And without rules what would we have? RULELESSNESS, you may be assured of that. And what harm, after all, have the rules caused? By the rules we are able to declare this or that loser be sent to Coventry. By the rules we ensure that the Ladies of the Pool are treated with proper deference. By the rules we are not bothered by one or another young "gunslinger" who's looking to make a reputation. And if we have a system in place that determines the worth of a candidate, what harm there? Would we truly want to let every Iron Chef Sakai Come Lately to trample about with no regard to the established residents? I think not. Besides, if we have no Knights then we have no Seniour Knights and I would no longer be the Seniour Seniour Knight ... would you want THAT on your conceienn ... conscie ... head? I think not. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stikkypixie Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by stikkypixie: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Sir 37mm: I have returned, better than ever before... who missed me? Obviously we all did. That's it lads, I want to see each and every one of you for gunnery practice first thing in the AY EM! </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rleete Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Sir 37mm: Seeing as THERE are NO serfs & squires You dolt. My, it just fits so well, donchaknow. stoat is my squire. He might have been demoted to kniggit by now, if he were not off on a wild goose chase, er, noble quest at my behest. Get your facts straight before you distort them, you amoeba diddler. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Sir 37mm: I have returned, better than ever before... who missed me? had I heard of you I'd have a basis for comparison. as is, you reek of the guy who'd never been here before then started to laugh at all the inside jokes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Croda: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Sir 37mm: I have returned, better than ever before... who missed me? had I heard of you I'd have a basis for comparison. as is, you reek of the guy who'd never been here before then started to laugh at all the inside jokes. </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Croda: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Sir 37mm: I have returned, better than ever before... who missed me? had I heard of you I'd have a basis for comparison. as is, you reek of the guy who'd never been here before then started to laugh at all the inside jokes. </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
37mm Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: Sir Sir 37mm, meet M'Lud Croda. M'Lud, meet my former Squire... think of him as your idiot grandchild. JD Morse once told me that if I was ever unlucky enough to see this Croda fellow then I should poke him in the eye with a blunt carrot... well he kind of told me anyway... actually he told me never to email him again... and he didn't really mention anything about carrots... or Croda's eye... but despite his not saying it I still agree with his whole carrot philosophy... I think... Sigh... only in this damned House of JD Morse do you have a carrot philosophy... sigh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Boo Radley: Sir Sir 37mm, meet M'Lud Croda. M'Lud, meet my former Squire... think of him as your idiot grandchild. The turd didn't fall far from the outhouse there, eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 30, 2006 Share Posted November 30, 2006 Originally posted by Lars: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley: Sir Sir 37mm, meet M'Lud Croda. M'Lud, meet my former Squire... think of him as your idiot grandchild. The turd didn't fall far from the outhouse there, eh? </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Originally posted by Lars: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley: Sir Sir 37mm, meet M'Lud Croda. M'Lud, meet my former Squire... think of him as your idiot grandchild. The turd didn't fall far from the outhouse there, eh? </font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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