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Apocalypso! 4Horsemen!! But no Seanacoochie or Peng To Challenge Them?


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Well, those last two posts make Tiny Thinker seem witty by comparison. I suppose I could be troubled to give him a quick spanking, if MrSpkr cares to send a scenario my way. I am not really up for anything too ridiculous. Crodaburg and the likes are really only tolerable once.

Tiny, I am purposely overlooking the existence of that grinning blue abomination in your latest post in the hopes that it will be edited, and replaced by a puddle of blue goo.

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Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I think we need a sign on the door, You Must Be THIS High To Enter! ... of course we'd have to give Seanachai a special exemption.

Joe

No fears, Joe. You wouldn't believe how high I normally am. And that's almost all residuals from the 70s and 80s.

If you're going to set the bar to my scale, you're going to have use hot-air balloons just to get a glimpse of me soaring above you lot.

Go ask Alice, when she was just small...

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Originally posted by Leutnant Hortlund:

Picture%2012.jpg

Dear God, Hortlund, is that you holding the beer? What a scary looking bugger you are, and no mistake. I imagine the the next time we see that face will be in a International news story about a Hitchcockian, shower-scene stabbing Swedish mass murderer.

Put on Mum's clothing lately?

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I am returned!

I said that aloud for the slower witted amongst you, who hadn't made that leap of intellect from my previous 3 or so posts.

After a night of multiple Abominations, much raving, gratuitous insults offered to Outer Boarders, and a bit of pseudo-shouting at the rather humorous Griffincheng, not to mention a certain period of tenseness with the upstairs neighbour about how ridiculous it is that 'well, yes, I do have keys to all the apartments, but why would I be in your sodding apartment at 4 AM making ham sandwiches from your fridge' business, I find myself posting here once again.

And I am not impressed. Buzzsaw isn't dead, but I'm not sure that's a rejoicing matter, and the latest crop of SSNs are rather sodden.

The kind of people, in fact, who'd have a whole fecking refrigerator full of sliced ham, and no goddamn rye bread, just white bread, and horrible, 'Taystee' or 'Wonder' style white bread, at that, like eating well-cured sliced pig layered on unflavoured fecking slabs of marshmallow, what's this bloody world coming to, I ask you?

But that's not what I came to talk to you about.

No, it's simply this. You have, all of you, been a great group of people to get to know. You're like a huge, extended, dysfunctional family that the State simply hasn't gotten around to sending to Social Services yet. But things change, and people move on. Sometimes people find that the demands on their time and attention shift in unexpected ways.

When I began this Thread, I never had any sort of clue as to what it would evolve into. Would I have proceeded to 'Challenge Peng', had I known? I like to think I would. To quote the Duchess in Pratchett's "Wyrd Sisters":

"I've seen exactly what I am, do you understand, and I'm proud of it! I'd do it all again only hotter and longer! I enjoyed it, and I did it because I wanted to!"...

"You gawping idiots!" she said. "You're so weak. You really think that people are basically decent underneath, don't you?"

It's been a long, barking mad run of good fun and bad insults, thousands of posts of wit and gibberish, and too many late nights, too-early mornings, and jolly sing-songs.

But...

Life, as they say, goes on.

Well, not mine, you clutch of overly-full, leaking colostomy bags. I will continue to post here, curse you all, until Berli opens a 'free hugs' booth at a local 'Wellness Faire', and Peng gets his own 'Mr. Rogers' style children's show, and the Four Horsemen ride out without benefit of a 30 post fecking colour commentary series of gibberish by Grog Dorosh, and the Justicar opts to ignore the sodding 'rules' in favour of some bizarre form of participatory Democracy, and some of you lot post something that makes me bloody laugh more than once a fortnight!

Oh, and we discover that the previously unnamed and unrealized Tenth circle of Hell turns out to be the 'Hello Kitty' merchandising initiative.

Given that that one's already come to pass, you buggers had better get to work on the others if you ever want to see the backsides of my own fine self.

Wow. It takes it right out of you to write gibberish of that level of quality. Not that most of you would know.

Back after a breather with a new round of 'Abominations'.

[ October 28, 2003, 09:48 PM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

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Goly gee batman we've got a problem. It seems that gremlins, i'm not going to count out gnomes, but it looks to be gremlins right now, have infested my computer and used my logic board as a place to birth their young. So i will have no CM capable computer till next week, provided that the Apple guys don't screw up and actually ship it back to me in good order. But don't think this will give you much respite from my challenge Buzzy.

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Originally posted by dalem:

Well tonight I teach myself how to mold and cast with Alumilite. I just thought you'd all want to know.

Making casts of your "love-viper" to show off to the rest of the Minnisota miscreants? Shouldn't take much material.
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5 The use of the term 'love viper', and all those like it, are an Abomination in the eyes of Seanachai!

Any 'macho/cutesy play on the concept of 'penis'. Call a spade a spade, and also stop dancing around the fact that you think your rather unimpressive ordinance for urination is some sort of 'thunderbolt' sent down to amaze mortals.

We are not impressed. They are not impressed. You should not be impressed, and the fact that some of you are still shaking the rattle, beating the drum, and chanting like a Shaman who's loan's being called in by the Goddess should tell you more than you should ever want to know about how you should just shut the hell up about all that coiled manhood you imagine is residing between your thighs.

It's not, lads. Al that 'springing adder sexuality' is rather more a bad stain on oft washed, lonely sheets than any sort of reality.

But go ahead and posture some more, and pretend like you're the 'striking snake penis gift to womankind'. They laugh about us, even when they like us.

They laugh a lot.

They almost never stop laughing, in fact.

In fact, the whole concept of War is pretty much a male response to the need to get away from the laughter and 'Kick Some Arse' in the name of not being laughed at quite so much by those goddamn sodding women.

They simply don't understand anything about Real-Polotik. If it was left up to them, people without the will to eat their enemy's liver wouldn't be in position's of Authority.

And where would we be then?

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Originally posted by Seanachai:

5 The use of the term 'love viper', and all those like it, are an Abomination in the eyes of Seanachai!

Right. Well then, time to annoy a gnome with an abominable little ditty.

Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?

Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?

It's swell to have a stiffy.

It's divine to own a dick,

From the tiniest little tadger

To the world's biggest prick.

So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas.

Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake,

Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend,

Your Percy, or your cock.

You can wrap it up in ribbons.

You can slip it in your sock,

But don't take it out in public,

Or they will stick you in the dock,

And you won't come back.

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Originally posted by Seanachai:

5 The use of the term 'love viper', and all those like it, are an Abomination in the eyes of Seanachai!

Any 'macho/cutesy play on the concept of 'penis'. Call a spade a spade, and also stop dancing around the fact that you think your rather unimpressive ordinance for urination is some sort of 'thunderbolt' sent down to amaze mortals.

We are not impressed.

Well Old Gnome, some of us haven't spent quite as much time as you in the truckstop lavatories earning rent - it's easy for you to be nonplussed.

Besides, I had tired of using the euphemism of "innermost secret man-garden". Wouldn't you tire of using the euphemism of "innermost secret man-garden" too?

Who'd ya send the card on to?

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Were you party to this, Seanachai?

Police Watch Abducted Gnomes Gather Dust

October 28, 2003 10:16 AM ET

PARIS (Reuters) - A French police station has been stuck with a room of homeless garden gnomes, victims of a wave of gnome abductions, after a fresh bid to trace their owners failed.

PS as a victim.

Mace

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I am after putting together...a musical collection. A CD to send to all the useless little lads, as it were.

I'm going to call it: The UberGnome Collections. Stuff that most of you dangling bits of rejected manhood will never hear any other way. But I'm having troubles figuring out how exactly to organize it, in terms of 'Cesspool, Sadness, Humour, Seanachai's Demons'

Bloody iTunes is the greatest sodding tool in the 'Dancing and Juggling Bears' repertoire of the Universe for putting together a really, really great collection of very personalized sing-songs.

Oh, and I'd hate you all with the fierceness normally reserved for ingrown toenails and politicians, but you are all my little lambs, and I have a hard time forgetting how I watched each and every one of you stupid buggers find your feet in this long, long, ongoing Thread.

I'd say, 'who's up for a jolly sing-song', but that's where the problem is, you see? How to organize all the lovely, lovely songs that I've listened to while reading the utter, vile, useless gibberish that you lot have been cranking out for simply ages.

[ October 29, 2003, 04:19 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ]

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Originally posted by Seanachai:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by ozi_digger:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Mace:

Hey you old uns', can we make him a serf?

You can have him for a pet </font>
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Originally posted by Seanachai:

In fact, the whole concept of War is pretty much a male response to the need to get away from the laughter and 'Kick Some Arse' in the name of not being laughed at quite so much by those goddamn sodding women.

They simply don't understand anything about Real-Polotik. If it was left up to them, people without the will to eat their enemy's liver wouldn't be in position's of Authority.

And where would we be then?

Umm, still playing with our dangly bits?...

SSN Hint Of The Day: Take forever to find your word in Scrabble.

Now sod off.

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