Sir Peng, I take your challenge to Lord Raglan

[Kitty]

Originally posted by Kitty:

Hakko Ichiu sees that his fly is open.

Jshandorf notices it too and is glad.

Kitty

------------------

Hamsters at War!

Chicks With Tanks

Lorak's FTX

"I'd rather the Bees than your Mask of Shame." - Stuka

The True Blue Aussie Slang Source

The Unofficial Vic Bitter Website

Jesus Dress Up!

The McNoldy Group

[bauhaus]

Originally posted by Pale:

I get the feeling this is technically the real opponent finder thread, right? If so I'd like to play, please, thank you.

Did somebody actually say please and thank you on this thread?

Sod off now!

[jshandorf]

Originally posted by Kitty:

Jshandorf notices it too and is glad.

Kitty

Heeeeeeeeeeeey. Are you insinuating something? Hmmm?

BTW I am polish TC, right? Ahhh.. I can see I am letting my hair blow freely in the wind. For I am a great TC and worthy of admiration. Sigh...

Jeff

------------------

When nuclear weapons are frozen then only freezers will have nuclear weapons.

[Forever Babra]

Originally posted by jshandorf:

Heeeeeeeeeeeey. Are you insinuating something? Hmmm?

BTW I am polish TC, right? Ahhh

I got sump'n fer ya to polish right here, bub. And I'll be the one making the "ahhh" noises, thank you very much.

[Kitty]

Originally posted by Forever Babra:

I got sump'n fer ya to polish right here, bub. And I'll be the one making the "ahhh" noises, thank you very much.

OGSF looks gives Babs a stern look for that comment.

And that'll be all the poolmod updates for a while. My brain hurts and I'm restless.

Kitty

------------------

Hamsters at War!

Chicks With Tanks

Lorak's FTX

"I'd rather the Bees than your Mask of Shame." - Stuka

The True Blue Aussie Slang Source

The Unofficial Vic Bitter Website

Jesus Dress Up!

The McNoldy Group

[Lorak]

Originally posted by Kitty:

And that'll be all the poolmod updates for a while. My brain hurts and I'm restless.

Kitty

Ahh, Thanks for all your hard work Kitty.

Sounds like you need someone to stand you up a Guinness or two.

Come by Maggie O'Rileys Irish Pup tonight about midnight. T'would be my pleasure.

(of course you might need to leave as soon as you see this. Not sure how many flights are avalible.)

Lorak the loathed

------------------

"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Combatmissionclub

and for Kitty's sake

=^..^=

[mensch]

Originally posted by Pale:

I get the feeling this is technically the real opponent finder thread, right? If so I'd like to play, please, thank you.

aaww cute.. ey crass alter! hast du ein problem? ey?

Pengkomon can I play with the new guest? can I can I? I want to test out this new Ebola virus, pleeeeese!!

well he is in the right place I see he is Pale like most English gits... here hold this tea while I load my gun.

[dalem]

Originally posted by Pale:

I get the feeling this is technically the real opponent finder thread, right? If so I'd like to play, please, thank you.

It's okay, folks, I've got this one. 'Bout time I did some real work in here anyway.

Pale, you have indeed stumbled upon a thread, but it's equal parts 'opponent-finder' and 'spleen-boiler'. Asking politely for a game will get you nothing but the insults we feel you deserve. demanding a game from a specific worm-eating member, on the other hand, complete with creative and original insults, will at least get you ridiculed, and possibly a game as well.

Basically the secret's in the sauce, and the joy is in the taunting.

But be original. For instance, I hate Meeks sooooooo much that I'm desperate to challenge him to a stomping that he'll not soon forget. My problem is that I hate him soooooo much that none of the standard tauntings are good enough. I could insult his manhood, but who around here hasn't done that? His family members are easy targets, especially once you get them liquored up, so that's no challenge. Big words? He can't understand them. His sexual preference? He has none.

So you see the problem. He's loathesome, sure, but that's not nearly enough to get a game from him.

So pick someone out, mangle their name, poke a rhetorical finger into their metaphorical eye, and earn some hatred.

------------------

I LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER BATTLE TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS NOW HIS AND I AM HIS SLAVE. PLEASE ABUSE ME AS YOU SEE FIT AND CALL ME A DOO-DOO HEAD. IT IS MY PLACE IN LIFE, I WILLINGLY ACCEPT IT.

[Lorak]

Originally posted by DOODOO HEAD:

It's okay, folks, I've got this one. 'Bout time I did some real work in here anyway.

Ahhh.. So nice to see welcome wagon roll out to greet the new comers

Way to go DOODOO HEAD !

Lorak the loathed

------------------

"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Combatmissionclub

and for Kitty's sake

=^..^=

[stevetherat]

Some ingredients;

1 pint of Guinness in probably the best Irish pub in London.

1 Gin cocktail in one of the hippest bars in London

1 bottle of 1996 Merlot in the Groucho Club - one of the most select clubs in London, along with buffalo (yes, real buffalo!) steak and hand cut chips, all paid for by the Company.

1 half-hearted tauntless challenge by J'ais Handshandy

Mix well with a tube ride home, and serve.

Drunk? You betcha! Stuffed to the gills? You betcha! Getting up for work on time? Not on your nelly!

Good night you worthless chimps, and I don't include Kitty in that catagory. She is an absolute Daaarling.

[Joe Shaw]

Ok, I can do that, maybe. Let's see, judging by the little pictures I can see you are all an ugly bunch, so why don't you try to redeem yourselves in my eyes with beautiful tactics in CMBO battle?

SIGH Ah lad, I'm afraid that just won't do at all at all. I really , I mean I REALLY REALLY think that you would do far better to look elsewhere for opponents. Perhaps some of the losers on the main CM board (which includes virtually everyone there) would be kind enough to point you to the various ladders and so forth that might give you the opportunity for a friendly game. For you see Pale my lad, the one thing you'll NOT get here is friendly. There are NO friends in the CessPool, were we not all equally asocial and unacceptable in polite company we'd hardly be able to stand the sight of each other, as it is we have little choice. Your wimpy little attempt at an insult is hardly to be categorized as such and it breaks one of the most important of rules, that the insult(s) be directed at a specific person and be done with some ... style! For an example, do a search for posts by my squire Agua Perdido, he too came to the CessPool looking for a game, but he came with panache, with flair and with style. You see, it's not how you play the game, but rather ... How You PLAY The Game!

Joe

------------------

I heartily admit you are a swine, Joe. But you are OUR swine. (Goanna)

[This message has been edited by Joe Shaw (edited 03-01-2001).]

[Iskander]

Originally posted by jd:

*spin mode on*

May I Have Your Attention, please... may I have your attention please... I think we may have a problem here...

We wish to announce that the seminal... pool... upon myself... and able member....

Plus it was... heartache and... embarrassment... clear cut....

grog stuff...

Anyway, I didn't want to steal... a victory... give him a "huzzah" and "well done, lad" ....

Keeping with our current supercillious twit Auld Angland image, that was a right fine summary there, jd. I had planned to discuss how your troops cowered in their crap-filled holes while my steely death rained down upon them seconds before my heroic infantry assault... pushing your men to the brink just as my armor scythed into your flank and rear dammit bauhaus! NO!, causing you such despair as to tearfully submit your surrender to me... and then to describe how I so graciously accepted so that you could help organize relief efforts to ship Red Cross Latte Packages to quake-torn Seattle.

Again: thank you for sparing me this task.

Thus! Lorak let it be scribed:

Iskander: win

jd: loss

And there are three more topplements on the way... well, only two since RatBastard has such a time returning his moves.

PS Hey, jd: you never turned your "spin mode" off... wait, you're a lawyer... nevermind!

------------------

"I send you a kaffis of mustard seed, that you may taste and acknowledge the bitterness of my victory."

"Legal advice is very often divorced from reality in my humble opinion" - BTS

[Lorak]

Originally posted by Iskander:

Again: thank you for sparing me this task.

Thus! Lorak let it be scribed:

Iskander: win

jd: loss

So It is written..So let it be done.

Tome is updated

Lorak

------------------

"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Combatmissionclub

and for Kitty's sake

=^..^=

[chrisl]

Lorak, oh Lorak...

Please get out the chisel and inscribe in Meeks' head..er.. I mean the tome:

chrisl: win

Lawyer: loss

It was close, and I had to do a gamey little flag rush that I'm sure he will go on and on about, but he should be used to that sort of thing, living inside the beltway, and being a lawyer and all.

The other lawyer is suffering badly. I may have to grant him a cease fire because I almost can't bear to watch 110 more turns of this. Either that or push him back off the map. He's demonstrated that he can fight effectively in neither fog nor clear (well, overcast, but visibility is pretty good). Send him to Jersey and let Hiram tutor him.

------------------

"If you can taste the difference between caviar on a cracker and ketchup on a Kit-Kat while blindfolded, you have not had enough aquavit to be ready for lutefisk." (stolen from some web page about lutefisk)

[Phillies Phan]

Originally posted by Kitty:

Jshandorf notices it too and is glad.

Kitty

glad I jumped ship when I did. Posterity doesn't agree with me.

[Guest Wildman]

Originally posted by jshandorf:

I'm really pathetic and I try to build my self-confidence by describing a beating by Hiram.

Some mildly humorous use of a Monty Python reference.

I fear Wildman so much that I will NOT seek a battle with him as the mere thought of it causes my manhood to shrivel and make me cry.

I'm going to pick on Stevetherat because he seems as pathetic as I am, and we'll make great bunk buddies.

More useless drivel

Jshagmeoff, you obviously have the mental capacity of Corky the Retard and the intestinal fortitude of a mewling babe. When you've done bolstering your manhood and inflating your self-worth, send me a setup so I can give you the thrashing that you so richly deserve. You pathetic little girly-man.

---

[Goanna]

Pity I am rarely on-line the same time as most of you rat bastards. I seem to miss most of the fun. Any of Pale's guts left to squish around in.

I sent Kitty a new pic but it seems that she has tired of this tangent for her creative effort and there were likely few spots to fill other than the French anyway.

Coleslaw has been granted the removal of his first and only wuss point after returning me the current file twice and Grade A rant bordering on apoplexy over e-mail. The wussiness had not really taken hold yet and the bouquet of latent wussiness should leave you in a day or so, Joe, if you stay out coffee houses, don’t read and Oscar Wilde and keep those turns coming.

Something should be forthcoming from the arch enemies of wussiness jd and Berliprovided they aren't caught up in the Real World™ somewhere, as both should have turn 1 of our extremely-gamey rematches in hand.

Anybody else notice that bauhaus now even tells himself to sit down?

[Treeburst155]

STAND UP, BAUHAUS!!

I just thought I'd make sure he's getting his calisthenics in. Now SIT DOWN, Bauhaus!

OK, here's the scoop on my two Pool games. Now I know you Pumpernickels (SIT DOWN, Bauhaus!!) don't care so pay attention closely anyway, ya doorknobs.

StevieTheRunt and that Germanboy lamer have both watched the first movie at this point. I'm expecting both to capitulate with their next files. Why? I am the very essence of the Blitzkrieg, that's why. Even my foxholes are highly mobile.

Now keep this paroxysmal, orgiastic synergy (JD, I believe) going; and SAW IT OFF COMPLETELY THIS TIME!!

Your Master, Treeburst155

[Roborat]

What is wrong with you people, this post is just one thread from being relegated to the second page, good thing I stumbled in. Back to the top you go, that's a good thread.

------------------

"With cat-like tread, Upon our prey we steal;

In silence dread, Our cautious way we feel." -G&S

[jd]

WussyLizard git, if your sever didn't bounce messages, maybe you'd have the turns earlier......

...and in other news, the investigating committee into the mysterious "alleged victory" of IKanpander deepens as it has been revealed by sources close to the investigation that the aforementioned "uselsss wank" has failed, in response to the special prosecutor, Jake "the snake" Lawyer's subpoena, to turn over to the committee crucial evidence. Sources mention that the "so-called" AAR is vital for the committee to peruse as it will yield vital clues as to the forces Mr. 'pander had at his disposal in the recently concluded game.

An investigator close to the investigation said,"everyone knows it is standard practice to return the AAR's. What's he hiding?"

Mr Iskdoofus was unavailable for comment. Consideration is being given to file a writ of mandamus and seek an injunction before the circuit court, the Hon. Judge Lorak, presiding, to decertify, or hold in abeyance, the victory until the investigatory committee ompletes it's work.

------------------

If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram

[Forever Babra]

Originally posted by Roborat:

What is wrong with you people, this post is just one thread from being relegated to the second page, good thing I stumbled in. Back to the top you go, that's a good thread.

There is nothing wrong with us. Like all good carnivores, we like to rest after a violent feed. Take my current opponent Lawyer for instance. After assaulting and over-running one of his infantry companies, I'm now running down the last few wretched, broken crews. Oh, did I mention he is the attacker? When the last fugitive has taken a bullet in the back, I'm going to rest under a tree and lick the speckled blood off my paws.

Likewise with My-Gal Dorothy. The gamey bastard thought he'd pull a fast one and set up fifty yards away from me. Too bad for him all I have to play with are Gebirgsjagers. The little hamsters are swarming over his legs right now, and getting uncomfortably close to something he holds dear -- or maybe he just holds it and calls it "dear". No matter. My cubs will play with his viscera like a ball of wool.

[dalem]

Originally posted by Treeburst155:

Severe crappage.

Treehugger. You're spastic. You're grating. You're nonsensical. You're drooling.

Send me a setup. Something no bigger than 1000 pts.

------------------

I LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER BATTLE TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS NOW HIS AND I AM HIS SLAVE. PLEASE ABUSE ME AS YOU SEE FIT AND CALL ME A DOO-DOO HEAD. IT IS MY PLACE IN LIFE, I WILLINGLY ACCEPT IT.

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by Goanna:

Something should be forthcoming from the arch enemies of wussiness jd and Berliprovided they aren't caught up in the Real World™ somewhere, as both should have turn 1 of our extremely-gamey rematches in hand.

Give yourself 1¥ for not cleaning out your e-mail so ours don't bounce

[Croda]

Originally posted by dalem:

...Send me a setup. Something that allows me to die quickly, instead of drawn out over a long time.

Pansy.

------------------

Woot! - Maximus2k

The New CessPool

[mensch]

Originally posted by Roborat:

What is wrong with you people, this post is just one thread from being relegated to the second page, good thing I stumbled in. Back to the top you go, that's a good thread.

Actually I was watching it fall and fall and fall.. and did not do a thing.. why? I don't care.. like a little boy who RIPS the wings off a fly to watch it walk around like a HAPLESS git waiting for DEATH to prounce on it at any MOMENT. It was fun... I got my kicks.. how about you RAT?

now were is my shotgun I want to shoot something.