Frequently Asked Questions answered by cesspoolers from the Peng Thread(tm)

[Binkie]

Thanks for the suggestions, Chupacabra. But no need for assumptions about my opponent. It's Fionn.

What now, brown cow? What kind of specific advice do I need?

[BFCElvis]

If you are playing Fionn your best move is to play the game, accept your defeat and hope you learn something. I am not kidding. Play your best game. You are dead no matter what you do. Just try to learn.

------------------

What do we do with a terrible liar? Well, Great liars we send into the clergy.

Good liars we groom for politics. Moderate liars we supply with sherrif's badges

and guns, and the bad liars, well, we make them heroin whores. So what the hell

do we do with the Terrible Liars? Well, it seems we turn them into physicists

called "chrisl." Peng

[Moriarty]

Binkie,

Chuppy, Berli and Elvis all have offered good advice. If you do take this advice, the limited visibility will mean close-in infantry engagement. You will need to get the biggest bang for your buck ... er, points. Pick infantry with highest firepower you can find. If Fionn selects fallschirmjaegers, gebirgsjaegers or some of the SMG and SMG/fusilier squads, he'll have an advantage in short-range firepower. A side note, if you get Fionn into a defensive position, it's even money or better that he'll attack in some way, shape or form. He's not one to sit back and wait for you. Above all, enjoy the game and learn.

------------------

"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[BFCElvis]

Ever since he got off the junk Moriarty has been thinking more clearly..if Fionn is on defense it is not a matter of "will he advance" but when....If he has any M.O. it is that he is an aggresive defender. Be prepared for that and you may get away with a major defeat instead of a total defeat.

------------------

What do we do with a terrible liar? Well, Great liars we send into the clergy.

Good liars we groom for politics. Moderate liars we supply with sherrif's badges

and guns, and the bad liars, well, we make them heroin whores. So what the hell

do we do with the Terrible Liars? Well, it seems we turn them into physicists

called "chrisl." Peng

[Kanonier Reichmann]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Binkie:

Thanks for the suggestions, Chupacabra. But no need for assumptions about my opponent. It's Fionn.

What now, brown cow? What kind of specific advice do I need?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

What I wanna know is how you managed to get Fionn to agree to the "challenge"- a term I use loosely I may add.

BTW, it is a genuine question.

Regards

Jim R.

[Berlichtingen]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>What I wanna know is how you managed to get Fionn to agree to the "challenge"- a term I use loosely I may add.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Honestly, the answer to your question is... ask him.

[mensch]

why do they call me madmensch?.. I am not angry, nor am I am upset. Why do small fluffy things appear in my bellybutton (no stuka/mace that is not sheep wool like yours).

Is little tommy going to get his christmas wish and recieve that new pork chop!?

Why does Seanachie smell sooo perdy only on thursdays?

Those funny smells from OSGF, are they harmfull to our braincells?

Why does Germanboy have to wear mittens while playing CM?

Is it true that a knocked out Tiger at 100m from a MG jeep a "gib"?

Does anyone else have a MontyPython "FOOT OF GOD" come down to squish your troops sneeking up to a Bannana sqauad?

is my medicine to strong to use on Lorak?

those guys in white uniforms, realy friends as they say so?

These are my questions about the Ping thread.

I looked up mensch at dictshonary.com

here is the results:

mensch or mensh (mnsh)

n., pl. mensch·en (mnshn) or mensch·es. Informal

A person having admirable characteristics, such as fortitude and firmness of purpose

------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Yiddish human being, mensch, from Middle High German human being, from Old High German mennisco; see man-1 in Indo-European Roots.]

First I have never! I mean "fortitude"?? I have never taken vitamins in my life!!!

Second "firmness of purpose" what does that mean!!?? I mean I know the wife says *hurr hurr* well you know what I mean! *wink, wink* *nudge nudge* you know what I mean!, say no more, say no more!

Third "see in Indo-European Roots." I have never stolen any Tubers in my life, I hate Parsnips! potatos ok.. but I never stole anything!

also I have checked my true name Gregory and this is the result

Greg·o·ry (grg-r), Lady Isabella Augusta Persse. 1852-1932.

Irish playwright. She was a founder (1899) and director (1904-1932) of the Abbey Theatre, for which she wrote a number of short plays, including Spreading the News (1904).

First I am flattered *bats eyelashes* that I am considered a lady.. *cough* yup got a pair.. hmmm stupid search engine.

Second I don't recall being born in 1852 nor dying in 1932

Third I don't recall writing anything worth being called a playwright

Fourth I am still upset they insist I am a "she" those bastards are going to hear from my lawyer!!

Fifth I have never "Spread the News"!! I may have spread peanut butter on my toast or spread a cold, or seeded my "little fellers" but I have never Spreaded the news"!!! again laywer working on this one.

[This message has been edited by mensch (edited 12-31-2000).]

[dNorwood]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by mensch:

why do they call me madmensch?.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sorry to interrupt -

A while back, someone was having trouble with scenarios in the scenario directory stubbornly not appearing in the CM list. If that person is around, how (if at all) did you resolve that difficulty?

(No, it's no academic curiosity....)

[dNorwood]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dNorwood:

(No, it's no academic curiosity....)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

OK, here's something. If I change the CM version, the list of scenarios changes (lower version - fewer scenarios). So, then the question becomes does anyone know if the scenarios

-A Matter of Honor.cmb-

-Night of the Engineers.cmb-

-(and some others)-

by Tim Orosz were designed for the latest (v1.1 beta) version (I'm using v1.05 - which is the latest but one, right?).

Finally, am I correct in my surmise that scenarios designed with a later version are unavailable for a previous version.

[jd]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dNorwood:

Finally, am I correct in my surmise that scenarios designed with a later version are unavailable for a previous version.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

That has been my experience. !.05 does not list 1.1b# created scenarios. Since they will play on the final 1.1 get them to have. Sometimes things come out that later you wish you had gotten, but can't find now. Or try them out with the current public beta.

------------------

[Binkie]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kanonier Reichmann:

What I wanna know is how you managed to get Fionn to agree to the "challenge"- a term I use loosely I may add.

BTW, it is a genuine question.

Regards

Jim R.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I approached him politely and respectfully, with the clear understanding that my goal was to learn.

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elvis:

Ever since he got off the junk Moriarty has been thinking more clearly..

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Arrrghhhh. A fleeting moment of lucidity. Must ... find ... my ... junk.

------------------

"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[Herr Oberst]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by The Commissar:

*various mooing and bleating noises removed for readability*

2. I hear you have to insult pretty darn well to get one of the Cessers' to accept your challenge. Is calling the lot of you "scum-sucking scum who marry your cousins" eligible to get a nod of approval?

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Herr Commisar, let us Poolers know when you graduate from Kindergarden Taunting...

A quick analysis of your taunt, if you deem to call that a taunt, shows us Poolers several facts about The Commisar:

"Scum-sucking scum"... hmm, this particular bit of taunt needs some variety. Try to walk that fine line between using alot of different words, but when a serious taunt "Walks the Alphabet"^TM, it only shows that you have either recently received a dictionary as a gift, or finally learned how to use one.

"marry your cousins", while being a time-honored insult, is also time-worn as well.

So overall, we see that as a not-too-original version of a well-worn insult. Surely you can do better than that...

[Berlichtingen]

Commisar,

To further Herr Oberst's comments. If you want to challenge a 'Pooler', the taunt should:

a) be a good one

be directed at an individual, taunting the group as a whole will get you no where

c) be posted in the Cesspool itself

[Derfel]

Well, gents and creatures that can be found lurking in the gents,

I (a long-time-student of the Cesspool) have a question for the scenario-designer contingent among you:

Is there any way to stop infantry (in this particular case British infantry but I think the problem is general) from behaving like Kamikaze Lemmings?

Again and again I have tried to position infantry along an enemy's expected route of approach and then put them in hide mode so they won't reveal themselves too early.

Well, not only do the little digital bleeders expose themselves like a Cesspooler a a third grade schoolyard but they also invariably leave their comfy foxholes and take off toward the enemy, usually getting themselves Killed-a-lot to no purpose.

I have tried varios things, using elite forces, ambush markers, changing "exit" direction (which incidentally a lot of scenario designers seem to forget, leading to retreats and routs toward the enemy).

Suggestions are welcome... er... let me rephrase that; suggestions on the above problem are welcome, other suggestions dealing with sheep, mormon wives or small furry rodents can be sent to my private adress: bend.over@once.mo

-Derfel

P.S Whatever happened with Pengs's Pnemonia? The suspense has been killing me. D.S

------------------

The only problem for a cobra attacking small furry animals is that occasionally one of them will turn out to be a mongoose...

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by mensch:

why do they call me madmensch?.. I am not angry, nor am I am upset.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Maybe this will help clear things up for you Mensch.

http://www.pignc-ispi.com/forums/humor/messages/17.html

Personally I think it says it all

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL......

[David Aitken]

Derfel wrote:

> Is there any way to stop infantry (in this particular case British infantry but I think the problem is general) from behaving like Kamikaze Lemmings?

I have noticed this myself, and it's a bit annoying. However, I think the rule is, if you're playing against the AI, and its troops can't see your troops, it will move them until they can. Regardless of whether it means abandoning nice safe positions.

Look at it this way – the AI is allowed to position its forces itself, but what if it puts them in a completely useless position? They'll sit there the entire battle and do nothing. Therefore, the only way to ensure that the AI can bring all its troops into battle, is by telling it to advance them, even if it's defending.

This of course isn't a problem when you're playing a human opponent. I think there may be scenario design techniques which help to avoid it, although I haven't done enough experimentation myself. I think the best idea is to put a Victory Location (flag) nearby, so that the troops know the enemy will be coming to get them, and they'll hopefully stay where they are. If you have a lot of troops spread over a wide area, use small flags, so that there aren't a lot of huge objectives on the map.

I think the AI will treat any forces forward of a VL as scouts or a mobile defence, so it won't leave them in place. Anyone who has more experience of this, or who has found the perfect solution, please speak up.

David

[Moriarty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by David Aitken:

Derfel wrote:

> Is there any way to stop infantry (in this particular case British infantry but I think the problem is general) from behaving like Kamikaze Lemmings?

This of course isn't a problem when you're playing a human opponent. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Seanachai might beg to differ. He's been having a wee problem with keeping his Brits from running and re-running into known areas of intense enemy firepower and flamethrowers.

Unless, of course, we are to surmise that Seanachai is not ... human.

------------------

"Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line

[This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 01-01-2001).]

[Guest Germanboy]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Derfel:

Is there any way to stop infantry (in this particular case British infantry but I think the problem is general) from behaving like Kamikaze Lemmings?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Try playing around with the friendly map-edges and the positioning of VLs. I really have not had that problem in my home-made scenarios. Also, you have to realise that some scenarios can only be played by the AI on one side effectively, mostly on the defense. They simply won't work, e.g. if you try to have the AI waltz into an ambush and deal with it. Maybe that is affecting your design problems, difficult to say at a distance.

Joeski, the reasons I did not reply to your request are manyfold:

1. I am not able to play until later this week, since I am in Germany, visiting family.

2. I am not really that good, as Elvis should know from playing and beating me badly.

3. My dance-card is rather full at the moment, and will stay like that until late in January.

------------------

Andreas

Der Kessel

Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission.

[David Aitken]

Back to the top we go...

[Berlichtingen]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Is there any way to stop infantry (in this particular case British infantry but I think the problem is general) from behaving like Kamikaze Lemmings?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I don't think I have ever encountered this. Can you send me a file that gives an example of what you are talking about?

[David Aitken]

Berlichtingen wrote:

> Can you send me a file that gives an example of what you are talking about?

He basically means that, even on the defensive, the AI is wont to order its men out of their cosy foxholes if they're not in a position to shoot at you. I've seen it do this with AT guns, for goodness sake. I made up a (daft) scenario with a horde of German machineguns, flamethrowers, mortars and AT guns dug in behind a wall – a perfect defensive position – and they all just got up and started marching for the gate, thus rendering themselves sitting ducks to the Allied onslaught and, in the AT guns' case, being unable to reorientate themselves in time to do any damage before they were destroyed. I think sticking a VL nearby is the solution – in other words, if you want to see this effect, do the opposite.

[mensch]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2:

Maybe this will help clear things up for you Mensch.

Personally I think it says it all

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

gee thanks snuckie... some one cares out there... now if only one could tell me if I have charming looks.. (you sit down Peng)

[Simon Fox]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>If you are playing Fionn your best move is to play the game, accept your defeat and hope you learn something.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Exactly the kind of second rate thinking you'd get from a poolie. You never accept your defeat. After all if Fionn does kick your arse it might end up as an AAR, hehe.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>If he has any M.O. it is that he is an aggresive defender.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>If Fionn has any M.O. it is that he likes everyone to think this.

------------------

"Labrat, you're a genius"- Madbot

[von shrad]

It is time to grovel for it is I, a fellow muck-dweller who stands before this ...er...group with a question to any who would help. Oh the shame. My queries are of the Tech. sort and please be gentle with the replies because I don't know the difference between a hole in my RAM from a hole in the ground, which brings me to my problem;

I feel that I am losing Memory for lack of better words while playing the game because it is starting to glitch and lag even on small maps. Although it slowed on larger maps before, it has never acted this way for the size of battles that I limit myself to.

Here are some of my specs.

PII 450

128 megs ram

Voodoo 3 16 meg pci

10 gig HD

73% Free space

Latest DirectX (I am now running DX9 after updating my v-doo 3 drivers today with the latest)

So my questions are these;

1 What could be causing the lags? Memory leak?

2 Is there an easy way to troubleshoot these kind of problems?

After I installed the latest drivers for the voodoo today I deleted the preferences in CMBO before I did a test. The option first given to me was

'Accept Graphics Mode'

. Primary Display Drivers

3 Should it not show my Voodoo-3 card in the pop-up header or does it always just say 'Primary Display Drivers'?

4 Was there a change to the BMP's for the grass that was included with the various patches. My grass is taking on a 'rougher' look as it did before when I had an old 8meg V-2 card and it was then that I realized there might be another issue going on.

Thanks for all the help in advance and I only wish I had not thrown away my Mr.T self-help tapes, 'Computer Troubleshooting For Fools'. Damn the luck.

BTW, I think I hate you all a little less although it could just be the holiday cheer.