Marlon Brando, the PENG CHALLENGE and me

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Geier:

I spent most of those days perpetually drunk so I can't recall much. I'll be back with some more Neil Young lyrics later.

Well tell me more, tell me more, tell me more

I mean, was he a heavy doper

or was he just a loser?

He was a friend of yours...

[Joe Shaw]

Originally posted by OGSF:

Noo hoo shud Ah put thas.... Af'n ye tak a wee haggis, an' string at oop o'er a roarin' candle, wait 'till at swells oop tae a fullsome tautness - thain SMACK THA JIBBERIN' SASSANACHS OOT O' AT WI THA FLAT O' YE CLAYMORE.... ye'll gi' a vague impreshun o' wha' Joe Shaw's wee laddies looked leek after Ah finished wi' haim.

Tha stankin' AI saw fit tae gi' mae a Stuart, FIVE feckin' jeeps an' a M3 halftrrrack....och, an' a SINGLE BLOODY PLATOON... tae di' battle agin' tha chicken struttin' Just-a-bugger. Tha pox-blown AI thain saw fit tae gi' Joe Shaw a stankin' PANTHER, a gamey HETZER, three HT 250/9s' and two HT 251/1s'. Plus a gaggle o' bloody troops akin tae tha hordes o' tha feckin Zulu Nation!!

Sae, ootnumbered an' oot gunned aboot fifty hunnert thoosand tae wun, mah wee span'l prrroceeded tae slap haim aboot tha map lak a wobbly haided chew-toy. Final score fer mah span'l 84 tae 16, tae gi' a Total Victory tae Clan OGSF o'er Hoose Shave-yer-arrrse.

Tha ainly teem Ah hailped mah wee span'l were tae sait tha way-points fer her inspired flank run wi' her Stuart. Afore tha move, Joe Shaw were a watery-eyed bastaarrrd wi' a quiverin' bottom lip. After at hae were a blubberin' mess wi' oot tha will tae gi' on.

Uhmmmm, no ... no thanks OGSF, I've already eaten but do dig in yourself lad.

I tell you lads it's worse than Pawbroon and he's French for the love of Gawd! Is it any wonder I threw the game. Took me thirty minutes trying to decypher his emailed gems like: Och laddie, weel the tonk rolled roight over ye dinne they no! I'm telling you it took some serious skill to manuever him into a win, luckily I had green troops while his were Veteran so that helped. Mostly though I just asked myself ... What would Stuka do? and that seemed to serve well enough.

Joe

[Mace]

Originally posted by Doug Beman:

see how he deftly works his way into my flank (DOWN Mace!)

Sorry, that's Bauhaus' job.

Mace

[Guest Mike]

Wot?? Downing Mace...or is that going down on Mace??!!

Anyone can do the former, but it has to be said that it takes a particular brand of stupidity to perform the later.....mind you....you could be right.....

[ August 06, 2002, 05:08 AM: Message edited by: Mike ]

[AUSSIEJEFF]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

*sob, sob* ..... luckily I had green troops while his were Veteran so that helped. Mostly though I just asked myself ... What would Stuka do? and that seemed to serve well enough.

Joe

By Berli's beard man! Are you psychic?? I've just begun a hellish QB with FOGS in which I have cunningly purchased a pathetic Green Allied rabble versus his Veteran bagpipe-busting Bosch. On turn 1 the gamey scoundrel sent a halftrack with Schreck speeding headlong into my assorted idjits, scattering them like startled rabbits. What a gamey bastaaardd!!! With luck, I should be thrashed by turn 10.

Not only that, but I am, in turn, in the closing stages of thumping the bejimminies out of Stuka's 112th Pixietruppen Div. in a game where all I do is hit "GO" and he dies-a-lot while scratching his bald head. Luvly stuff.

Mr Xia, I do believe we may have some sort of telapathetic synergy, old chap. Correct me if I'm not wrong.

Sir AJ

[AUSSIEJEFF]

Roight!!

*Listen up*, you dozy lot!!

I've just spent 13.75 years creating my lastest masterpiece wot needs some scurrilous testin'.

It's wot I call a "Quick Op <SUP>tm</SUP>" and consists of 3 nasty x 10 turn battles with lotsa arty farty whizz-bangery, clanketty thingies, crazed pixel poltroons and general mayhem to *BOOT*. Good fer PBEM-like gamery. Oh, an some Cesstuous surprises within {*snicker*}.

So, any you lot feelin' bored outta yer brains, this'n should scramble 'em reeeeel good! Just drop me a nod an' a wink an' I'll lob this crap your way sometime before Xmas. Honest! Only US$13.99 plus postage.

{WARNING: This Op carries a "X" rating due to excessive levels of violence and bloodshed, so no namby-pamby younguns' need apply, orright?)

Sir Flamin' Half-drunk AJ

[Doug Beman]

Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

Awright, who's going to take up the challenge and play me a game of that revisionist ****E our Lawyer is crowing about on the outerboards?

Geez, his infectious excitement sounds like the first time my son "Made Doody!" in the terlet.

Beman! As the MBT's oldest forum member to ever be taken to squerf, I call you out. Now, be a good lad and send me a package, and you, squerf, make sure you choose the bright-eyed but dim-witted New Worlders.

And be quick about it, 'cause if someone more worhty than yourself (read anyone) sends me that History-Rewritten before yourself, why I'll snub you with the disdain I reserve for jet-skiers.

Most accursed one, you shall have said package Wednesday night EST. I will award you 50 bonus points if, during our contest, you locate my hidden assault boat.

DjB

[Doug Beman]

Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

Mrspkr your squerf has been two hours without posting in the MBT. If this were the Outerboards it would be a new record for him. But here... methinks not. Please fix or do somefink.

Apologies, oh lascivious one.

Originally posted by MrSpkr:Now, laddy, the fair Lady Persephone of the Infinite Patience has, for reasons only God can determine, taken a liking to you. She has requested you post "in lithping thtyle" on the accurthed Outerboards.

For the next 48 hours you shall so post.

If I do'd it, mayhap I wouldst receive some small favor from the Enchanted Lady herself? A scented kerchief which I might frame and place centrally among my pitiful few trophies. Or perhaps a sonnet drafted in her own hand, that I could commit to memory and take with me even unto my grave.

[serious]I was out all Monday night buying a celebratory dinner for two good friends who just announced their engagement (also he's about to start a new job and is really excited) and tonight I'm having dinner with my inner circle of friends, so m'hap the 48 hours should be extended past Wednesday evening?[/serious]

Alas, most aweinspiring Mr Spkr, I've begun losing the edge of victory in battle against the hated Graydrool Flicka; apparently his infantry guns are able to resist multiple bombardments with 75mm HE, while my platoon HQs go from OK to Panicked after 2 bursts of incoming MG fire.

That gamey (or should that be homely?) bastiche Merk is still taking advantage of the fact that my briefing in our battle seems to expressly order me to sail my assault boats past several IG emplacements. Perhaps this battle was originally written for the short-lived Lifeguards' Tourney?

However, I am still kicking the spackle out of athkettle, which seems to have significantly slowed his rate of turn-sending. Pigeon-toed puff-jaw

DjB

[ August 06, 2002, 08:36 AM: Message edited by: Doug Beman ]

[Joe Shaw]

Mr Xia, I do believe we may have some sort of telapathetic synergy, old chap. Correct me if I'm not wrong.

AussieJeff I have never been so offended in my life and that includes the time that Rebecca told me I looked like a movie star and then went on to say it was Wally Cox!

Note you sir, I've not attacked you in any way (other than to point out the obvious, that you're a pillock, an Australian AND a damned poor liege), nor have I ever failed to properly spell and bold your name (once you became one of us ... no matter how hard I lobbied against it) and now to have this odious suggestion that we somehow have something in common!

You sir, are an Australian! That ALONE would disqualify you from having much of anything in common with the rest of humanity ... even including Scotland, Canada and Sweden. But worse than that you are ... well ... who you are!

I demand, DEMAND I say, a full and complete retraction and fulsome apology or I shall be forced to defend my honor!

Joe

[Noba]

Posted by the Just-a-few-brain-cells...

I demand, DEMAND I say, a full and complete retraction and fulsome apology or I shall be forced to defend my honor!

This should be good. Which Honor was that ? Blackman ?

Noba.

[Noba]

How many Olde Ones were you waiting on? Stop being such a twit and get on with the smiling

Look at that. Berli has gone soft....!!

Noba.

[athkatla]

Originally posted by Noba:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />How many Olde Ones were you waiting on? Stop being such a twit and get on with the smiling

Look at that. Berli has gone soft....!!

Noba.</font>

[Joe Shaw]

Damnit lads, he's about it again! You know who I mean, that's right Seanachai is out trolling on the outerboards again, but this time he's gone off the deep end because ... it's a GIRL! Or at least it's supposed to be:

Roxy Shows Up ... Seanachai Goes Goofy

Now based on "her" profile, I beg leave to have doubts:

Roxy's Profile

But that's by the by and we'll no doubt find out in good time, but this shameless pandering to the outerboarders has to STOP!

Joe

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Doug Beman:

If I do'd it, mayhap I wouldst receive some small favor from the Enchanted Lady herself? A scented kerchief which I might frame and place centrally among my pitiful few trophies. Or perhaps a sonnet drafted in her own hand, that I could commit to memory and take with me even unto my grave.

DjB

If you ask nicely, I'm sure she'll sing the vegemite song for you.

If you're extremely fortunate, you'll be hit by a bus before you read the post.

If there really is an afterlife, justice, and a cosmic sense of humour, you'll spend eternity eating vegemite.

[Croda]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Geier:

I spent most of those days perpetually drunk so I can't recall much. I'll be back with some more Neil Young lyrics later.

Well tell me more, tell me more, tell me more

I mean, was he a heavy doper

or was he just a loser?

He was a friend of yours...</font>

[MrSpkr]

Originally posted by Doug Beman:

If I do'd it, mayhap I wouldst receive some small favor from the Enchanted Lady herself? A scented kerchief which I might frame and place centrally among my pitiful few trophies. Or perhaps a sonnet drafted in her own hand, that I could commit to memory and take with me even unto my grave.

Lad, yer not fit to carry her used feminine products out to the curb, let alone a hankie or a sonnet. Don't get ideas above your station (and we all know where THAT is).

[serious]I was out all Monday night buying a celebratory dinner for two good friends who just announced their engagement (also he's about to start a new job and is really excited) and tonight I'm having dinner with my inner circle of friends, so m'hap the 48 hours should be extended past Wednesday evening?[/serious]

Til Friday, then -- masochist. Go see Bauhaus if you need any, umm, pointers.

Alas, most aweinspiring Mr Spkr, I've begun losing the edge of victory in battle against the hated Graydrool Flicka; apparently his infantry guns are able to resist multiple bombardments with 75mm HE, while my platoon HQs go from OK to Panicked after 2 bursts of incoming MG fire.

Great news! Now post some screenshots, laddie -- we want SCREENSHOTS!

That gamey (or should that be homely?) bastiche Merk is still taking advantage of the fact that my briefing in our battle seems to expressly order me to sail my assault boats past several IG emplacements. Perhaps this battle was originally written for the short-lived Lifeguards' Tourney?

Orders, schmorders lad - we want SCREENSHOTS! Is that so difficult to understand?

However, I am still kicking the spackle out of athkettle, which seems to have significantly slowed his rate of turn-sending.

Translation: I am still breathing and capable of selecting the [GO] button without the use of any other command in the game.

Pigeon-toed puff-jaw

I hear you can get a shot to clean that up. Ask Mace.

Now, for your research this evening, fifteen pages, single spaced, on "The English: Socially Inept and Sexually Frustrated, or They Just Act that Way?"

Oh, and clean out Mouse's stall -- you wouldn't BELIEVE the stains he made on the porcelain.

Steve

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Damnit lads, he's about it again! You know who I mean, that's right Seanachai is out trolling on the outerboards again, but this time he's gone off the deep end because ... it's a GIRL! Or at least it's supposed to be:

Roxy Shows Up ... Seanachai Goes Goofy

Now based on "her" profile, I beg leave to have doubts:

Roxy's Profile

But that's by the by and we'll no doubt find out in good time, but this shameless pandering to the outerboarders has to STOP!

Joe

None of your sauce, Shaw!

The Cesspool stands One Hundred Percent behind anyone wanting to show up here and abuse Grog Dorosh. I merely let the poster know there was a forum for that sort of thing.

[athkatla]

Originally posted by Doug Beman:<HR>

Now, asskatla (notith the clever reverth lithp?) thince you have time to play rhyming gameth with me, perhapth you could thend me a fecking turn, tho that I might accomplish the Quetht thet before me????? Thycophantic thpavined thofthead<HR>

OI Beman you fat grovelling bar-steward. If you got your head out from up yon lasses arse for long enough, you might notice I did send a turn! So pull your finger out and get moving, you flabby git!

[Joe Shaw]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

None of your sauce, Shaw!

The Cesspool stands One Hundred Percent behind anyone wanting to show up here and abuse Grog Dorosh. I merely let the poster know there was a forum for that sort of thing.

Nonsense and fiddledepoop Seanachai, no use trying to put a good face on it, you were shameless trolling for outerboarders and you know it. Or would you suggest that WE of the CessPool are NOT capable of abusing Grog Dorosh adequately? That we need OUTERBOARDERS to do it for us? THAT WE NEED NEWBIE OUTERBOARDERS TO DO IT? THAT WE NEED (PRESUMED) GIRL NEWBIE OUTERBOARDERS TO DO IT?

It won't wash Seanachai ... I'm afraid that you're recidivist to the core.

Joe

[ August 06, 2002, 01:02 PM: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by MrSpkr:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Doug Beman:

If I do'd it, mayhap I wouldst receive some small favor from the Enchanted Lady herself? A scented kerchief which I might frame and place centrally among my pitiful few trophies. Or perhaps a sonnet drafted in her own hand, that I could commit to memory and take with me even unto my grave.

Lad, yer not fit to carry her used feminine products out to the curb, let alone a hankie or a sonnet. Don't get ideas above your station (and we all know where THAT is).

</font>

[Geier]

Originally posted by Croda:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Seanachai:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Geier:

I spent most of those days perpetually drunk so I can't recall much. I'll be back with some more Neil Young lyrics later.

Well tell me more, tell me more, tell me more

I mean, was he a heavy doper

or was he just a loser?

He was a friend of yours...</font>

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by Doug Beman:

<font size="+2">HE AIN'T GETTING ME CONKERS</font>

Yeknod o' tha Thistle and Defender of the Paddock

[ August 06, 2002, 02:44 PM: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]

[Papa Khann]

Since none of you have anything remotely interesting to say, I propose that it is once again time for some gamiest of gamey updates:

Pantless Leader: Has finally submitted to my superior tactical awareness and has been vanquished. The fact that the computer thought is was a DRAW (and awarded him more points than me, actually) is irrelevant. I proclaim myself victor based upon the fact that Pantless pulled rank on me and made me play the bleeding Ami's!

Nobutt: Seems preoccupied with running his few remaining Canuckians about the 4 corners of the map in an attempt to prolong the inevitable. Why don't you just surrender so I can start steamrolling you in fresh surroundings?

SomeNachos: Has finally begun to feel the bite of my superior infantry tactics. This is good, since the lucky git has already crushed my so-called armor like empty pop cans.

Boo_Rattly: Aren't you supposed to be the attacker in this QB, Boo-Boo? If I promise not to shoot at you for two turns will you at least try to move your remaining troops forward? I swear, you attack like a girl. Or worse yet, dalem. Speaking of whom...

dalem: Having had the recent misfortune to meet dalem outside of the Pool, I can say that alas, his quest for true hatred is not going so well. In fact, it appears to be dead.

He walked in wearing a white robe with a beer in one hand (commendable, but not exactly exuding hatred) and a fistful of pansies in the other. He then proceeded to pass out flowers and hugs to all present (I saw the git coming and managed to duck him, so what I'm really saying is that he hugged everyone else) and proclaiming himself the prophet of the New Church of Peach (I think he may have meant "Peace", but he was slurring his words pretty bad).

Fortunately this sordid affair was cut short when the father of a sixteen year old girl called the police and had dalem carted away. Apparently our newly proclaimed prophet had been attempting to show the youngster his new "Children of Peach Unit" tattoo (again, I think he may have meant "Children of Peace Unite", though I'm really not sure).

Oh yeah, the game. His troops appear to take their inspiration from dalem's new persona. They march blindly forward into the teeth of my carefully prepared defensive positions, spouting words of pacifism and tranquility. I almost feel bad watching movies of them being mowed down. Almost.

Joe Shaw: We've begun another scenario. To say that the current situation regarding "the record" (no, R_Late, not the kind of record for which you were required to spend your preteen years in the delinquent boys home) has me vexed and perplexed is an understatement. If I lose a third in a row to Joe (to freaking Joe, for the love of Pete!!!) I may head to the high bridge with a revolver (so I can shoot myself on the way down).

Papa

[Lars]

Originally posted by Roxy:

Michael Dorosh can't spell 'testicles' correctly.

I like her already.

[ August 06, 2002, 02:29 PM: Message edited by: Lars ]

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Papa Khann:

I may head to the high bridge with a revolver (so I can shoot myself on the way down).

Papa

<big><big> DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!</BIG></BIG>

I'd pay good money to see that. I'd even videotape it so I could sell copies to the other 'Poolers. Maybe even sell T-shirts; "I saw Pepe take the final dive with a one gun salute."

Could be neat.