Marlon Brando, the PENG CHALLENGE and me

[Gaylord Focker]

Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr /> There is no crying in CM! Now mail me out my turn Herr Panzy, you sorry exscuse for an arm chair Field Marshal!

Better to be an aem-chair (black leather of course) field marshal than a foot-stool piss-pot corporal, eh?</font>

[AUSSIEJEFF]

Originally posted by Noba:

Because one thing I've learned here is that I am the first PERMANENT SQUIRE of the CessPool!

Noba.

In an age of uncertainty, at least YOUR future seems rock solid.

Congatulations,

AJ

[Noba]

In an age of uncertainty, at least YOUR future seems rock solid.

Congratulations,

Why thank you Flossie-loser.

Noba.

[Guest Mike]

Lucky Noba - the only thing solid in the cess pool!

[Noba]

Lucky Noba - the only thing solid in the cess pool!

Could be good...could be bad !

Noba.

[athkatla]

Dear My Brave Sir "4 Legged" Knight, YEKNODATHON

I have to report that once again I have failed in battle going down to a heavy defeat against that gamiest of Finns, CMplayer. He don't play fair ya know, sneaks about like a big girls blouse, pratting about before delivering my boys a swift boot up the arse. Anyway, if he has the guts to challenge me to a real fight, where I am the Brits, and can show him how real Brits fight, I'l give him a right good hammering!

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by athkatla:

Dear My Brave Sir "4 Legged" Knight, YEKNODATHON

I have to report that once again I have failed in battle going down to a heavy defeat against that gamiest of Finns, CMplayer. He don't play fair ya know, sneaks about like a big girls blouse, pratting about before delivering my boys a swift boot up the arse. Anyway, if he has the guts to challenge me to a real fight, where I am the Brits, and can show him how real Brits fight, I'l give him a right good hammering!

Sqerf, the Paddock is noting yer progress. Maintaining me high standards of abject failure is pleasing - did yer frustrate the Norwegian pillock? Good, good, carry on.

Justicar - this one has shown promise and is pleasing to me squinting eye. Elevate me sqerf to QUIRE so that I can train him for me special purposes.

athkatla break out the bonnets and pinafores and prepare yerself for quests...

Yeknod o' tha Thistle and Defender of the Paddock

[athkatla]

Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by athkatla:

Dear My Brave Sir "4 Legged" Knight, YEKNODATHON

I have to report that once again I have failed in battle going down to a heavy defeat against that gamiest of Finns, CMplayer. He don't play fair ya know, sneaks about like a big girls blouse, pratting about before delivering my boys a swift boot up the arse. Anyway, if he has the guts to challenge me to a real fight, where I am the Brits, and can show him how real Brits fight, I'l give him a right good hammering!

Sqerf, the Paddock is noting yer progress. Maintaining me high standards of abject failure is pleasing - did yer frustrate the Norwegian pillock? Good, good, carry on.

Justicar - this one has shown promise and is pleasing to me squinting eye. Elevate me sqerf to QUIRE so that I can train him for me special purposes.

athkatla break out the bonnets and pinafores and prepare yerself for quests...

Yeknod o' tha Thistle and Defender of the Paddock</font>

[CMplayer]

Originally posted by athkatla:

I have to report that once again I have failed in battle going down to a heavy defeat against that gamiest of Finns, CMplayer.

Score 95-5

He don't play fair ya know, sneaks about like a big girls blouse, pratting about before delivering my boys a swift boot up the arse.

You got that part right, anyhow.

Anyway, if he has the guts to challenge me to a real fight, where I am the Brits, and can show him how real Brits fight, I'll give him a right good hammering!

Challenge accepted. I'll be scrutinizing my mailbox for a setup.

[CMplayer]

Oh and...congratulation on your demotion to squizzle or whatever it's called.

[athkatla]

Originally posted by CMplayer:

Oh and...congratulation on your demotion to squizzle or whatever it's called.

I shall send one on it's way North, as soon as I have devised my cunning plan, so Prepare to die or run away, as the case may be!

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

athkatla break out the bonnets and pinafores and prepare yerself for quests...

Yeknod o' tha Thistle and Defender of the Paddock

Don't forget the frilly parasols. A Quire can only mince properly if he's twirling a frilly parasol.

[athkatla]

Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

{snipped cos it's up there!}<HR>

By 'eck lad, your asking for another pasting,... err, ummmm, I did beat you....didn't I..?

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by athkatla:

By 'eck lad, your asking for another pasting,... err, ummmm, I did beat you....didn't I..?

No, it was a draw, you of the Swiss cheese memory.

BTW, everybody owes me turns. Even if we aren't playing a game presently, you owe me turns.

Gits.

[Yeknodathon]

*snigger* oops, I can hear the band play on the sinking Titanic *snigger*

[Joe Shaw]

Blast, damn and hell ... I suppose there's nothing for it now but to elevate athkatla (spelt but not bolded) to Squire. He HAS put in some time here, he HAS posted regularly ... still it just seems WRONG somehow. Maybe it's because he will be Squire to Yeknodathon and all that THAT entails. Still, one must do one's duty so ... barring any objection from one of the Olde Ones in whose stead I act in this matter, I hereby proclaim to one and all that Athkatla is Squire Of The CessPool and shall be placed under the care and tutelage (NOTE Yeknodathon TUTELAGE ... that means you must INSTRUCT the lad) of Sir Yeknodathon ... what IS the world coming to.

Noba if you are perpetual Squire then it is the fault of your liege. One of two things must happen, {thing the second} you must complete five (5) CessPool games whilst a Squire or (dealio the first) you must complete a Quest set for you by your liege. I MUCH prefer the first (shown here as the second for clarity) since it gives us more time to judge your worthiness but in any case it's your liege who has fallen down on the job.

Not too surprising since I'm the only Knight who has ever shown any inclination for the proper upbringing of Squires. My record of FOUR Squires raised to Knighthood is unsurpassed and I attribute it all to the stringent and established methods of instruction. I'm thinking of writing a book so I am.

Joe

[CMplayer]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I hereby proclaim to one and all that Athkatla is Squire Of The CessPool and shall be placed under the care and tutelage of Yeknodathon

I would just like to take this opportunity to register an objection. Well a quibble actually, or rather a concern.

Has anyone else noticed that both the Quadraped Kniggit and his new squire have the letter sequence 'ath' in their handles? Isn't that a bit unlikely, if it's only supposed to be a.....coincidence?

Not only that, but the 'ath' is oddly foregrounded in O' the Thistle's handle. 'Yeknod' is clearly 'Donkey' backwards. But WHAT THE HAY is 'athon' supposed to mean??? The 'ath' is obviously the key here, and suddenly another 'ath' guy comes waltzing in and makes squire in record time, TO THE ORIGINAL 'ATH'! It seems... precarious, murky, cause for concern as I'm sure you all agree.

Until an investigation is made of the matter, I recommend that athkatla retain his squerfy status, or at least only be made a probationary squire.

[Gaylord Focker]

Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr /> There is no crying in CM! Now mail me out my turn Herr Panzy, you sorry exscuse for an arm chair Field Marshal!

Better to be an aem-chair (black leather of course) field marshal than a foot-stool piss-pot corporal, eh?</font>

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Blast, damn and hell ... I suppose there's nothing for it now but to elevate athkatla (spelt but not bolded) to Squire. He HAS put in some time here, he HAS posted regularly ... still it just seems WRONG somehow. Maybe it's because he will be Squire to Yeknodathon and all that THAT entails. Still, one must do one's duty so ... barring any objection from one of the Olde Ones in whose stead I act in this matter, I hereby proclaim to one and all that Athkatla is Squire Of The CessPool...

Joe

Not until the North Country git admits he's a Geordie. I don't care if he isn't a sodding Yorkshireman, I want to hear him proclaim for all the world that he's a Geordie.

It's humiliation like that that makes this Forum great...

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by CMplayer:

'Yeknod' is clearly 'Donkey' backwards.

And yer clearly a kcollip forwards, blasted turnip.

Yeknod

[Patchy]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Not until the North Country git admits he's a Geordie. I don't care if he isn't a sodding Yorkshireman, I want to hear him proclaim for all the world that he's a Geordie.

It's humiliation like that that makes this Forum great...

Ummmm.....What's a Geordie?

Persephone

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Blast, damn and hell ... I suppose there's nothing for it now but to elevate athkatla (spelt but not bolded) to Squire. He HAS put in some time here, he HAS posted regularly ... still it just seems WRONG somehow. Maybe it's because he will be Squire to Yeknodathon and all that THAT entails. Still, one must do one's duty so ... barring any objection from one of the Olde Ones in whose stead I act in this matter, I hereby proclaim to one and all that Athkatla is Squire Of The CessPool...

Joe

Not until the North Country git admits he's a Geordie. I don't care if he isn't a sodding Yorkshireman, I want to hear him proclaim for all the world that he's a Geordie.

It's humiliation like that that makes this Forum great...</font>

[Guest Mike]

Originally posted by athkatla:

Anyway, if he has the guts to challenge me to a real fight, where I am the Brits, and can show him how real Brits fight, I'l give him a right good hammering!

Hang on - you're going to show him how real brits fight, so wouldn't that involve giving him 100 pts at teh start of the game then going down to the pub to buy him a beer and let him scratch you tummy, then let him cohabitate with your sister in a chocolate fondue?

"Brits fight" is an oxymoron - oh, wait - of course - you're a moron too - well that explains a little.

I'd love to see a bit of this "action" too, so send me something and I'll see if I can survive the fits of laughter it's likely to produce at this end!!

[Seanachai]

I see Treeburst has just exploded on the Forum, and the 'Titans' tournament seems to be defunct.

Probably inevitable. Whenever one of the Tournaments amongst the 'competetive' gets going, we're all subjected to (a lot less than the organizers like Treeburst, of course), a lot of urine flinging.

As a poor to middlin' player, the whole spectacle of people spending weeks, if not months, negotiating the 'appropriate conditions' under which a game might be 'considered' for play, is almost surreal. Not to mention the opportunity for 'Prima Donna' behaviour, manipulation, and rigging.

It's a bloody shame, really. Obviously no one wants to face a competetive game that allows someone the leeway to set up some sort of gamey, 'I've used this bizarre ploy dozens of times to overcome my opponents' superiour tatical abilities and smash through to a clown win' sort of stituation, but the thought of facing a negotiated 'My rigging is better than your rigging' sort of situation is almost equally objectionable.

Ah, the Mother Beautiful Thread, where people play for joy in the Game, and the jolly fun to be had in abusing, taunting, lying about, defaming, and yet, generally, respecting one's opponent.

After having witnessed more than one 'tournament' hit the skids of 'Victor's Ego Syndrome' (and that only through second hand, veiled comments on the Forum), I would raise this point with all the Outer Boarders:

Generally speaking, here in the Peng Challenge Thread, we play to play. I have seen a more honest 'love of the game' and 'competing for the joy of playing' attitude here than what seems to the norm on the Ladder boards and in the Tournaments.

I have, almost universally, found my opponents to be a flock of egregious halfwits who were courteous and pleasant in their emails, forthcoming about the game, minimally defensive about their own mistakes, and less than patronizing about their very best moves.

Oh, there have been exceptions, but not many. And, when either of us were a bit on the gloating or whinging side, it was pretty much a mutually practiced, humourously performed, and agreed upon thing.

So, Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you this toast, and this standard to bear:

To the Peng Challenge Thread, the Mother Beautiful Thread, the Cesspool! Where disgrace, ill-repute, and debasement are worn upon the sleeve, and honour strikes right to the bone! Oi, Oi, Oi!

On a completely unrelated note, let me say here what our own, lowly regarded and much revered MrPeng would not say on his own:

In his 'Cesspoolers' game against Fionn Kelly, Peng achieved a draw.

There were, of course, mumblings about 'not taking the game seriously', and 'I thought it was only Peng', and such.

Let it be scribed next to the name of Fionn Kelly, a Knight Champion of the Peng Challenge Thread:

Failed to Win Against Peng

[athkatla]

By the 'eck, I'm Lincolnshire born and bred and as a proud Yellowbelly, couldn't give a toss for anyone else, however, my cousin twice removed, did marry a girl, whose sister married some plonker from Gateshead who knew a Geordie fishmonger. So if it makes the bard happy, I'm sorta related to the geordie scum, and will be ganning up that way shortly to have a butchers at the wee lasses in the Big Market. Rumour has it there pretty free with it, if you know what I mean!!!