MrPeng Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Pillar: Why doesn't Peng himself ever start one of these threads? Hmm...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> OK MrPillar o' salt, Firstly, I did make the effort awhile back but was shouted down, with a stern reminder of Rule 11 of the Peng Manifesto...ahem. "Peng is not allowed to start a Peng Challenge thread." and Secondly, piss off you fetid smear of wombat poo. Peng Have I evr mentioned that I hate the "Instant Graemlins" quivering and posing at the bottom left while one composes? DID I SAY THAT EVER? GODDAM SMILIES!!!! AAAAARRRRHHHHGGGGG!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wesreidau Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 MrPeng, consider a piece of paper over the bottom left of your screen. PeterNZ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 Or gouging out your left eye. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: You earless low-life scum, Guinness is a kind of breakfast food; not so greasy as eggs, nor as filling as potatos, but rather like a fine, full-bodied, liquid form of toast.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hmm. Sorry, Sunshine, but I've never had it. I guess when I was over in London for a couple of days that's even what I saw them drinking, but I never thought to ask. Ahh well, doesn't sound like I missed anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted April 15, 2001 Author Share Posted April 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>(Former owner of Dalem and Joe Shaw's particulars)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>It is so sad to see a Knight reduced in circumstance isn't it? We all mourned (in our own way ... mostly making abdominal noises with our armpits) when Hiram Sedai said he was leaving (he lied but that's not the point), we still miss Hakko Ichiu after he was taken away (those men in the white coats do NOT mess around) and we were geniunely regretful when we had to buy the shorter chain for Bauhaus. But the tragic case of PeterNZer surpasses them all for gut wrenching, heart rending pathos. Dalem and I both had agreed to Blood Hamster matches with PeterNZer and while I can't speak for Dalem (actually he doesn't speak for himself very well either) I certainly expected that I would be contesting with a True Knight of CessPool. I was shocked to find that he would stoop so low as to use MINES, but since we're all Gamey Bastiches anyway I accepted that. When he defeated me (did I mention that he used Mines?) I acceeded to the terms of the match and used the sig he specified for the alloted time. I did not, however, expect that he would then alter his sig as shown above. A True Knight of the CessPool, as we all know, is above trivialites such as wins and losses. Yes, Loark posts such things but a True Knight of the CessPool doesn't even look at them. I had to hunt for several minutes before I found the site again and do you know what I discovered? No? Well, let me tell you. The so-called Knight PeterNZer is SO proud of his victories over Dalem and myself that he boasts of them IN HIS SIG! But that's not the worst of it, oh no, not the worst by far. For I discovered that Dalem and I, together, have a combined Win/Loss record of 1/11/5! Now we see from whence PeterNZer determines who will be challenged to a Blood Hamster Match. PeterNZer CARES ABOUT WINNING! I could hardly believe it but the evidence is indisputable. He chooses his challenges based upon {gag} their win/loss record. But that's not the worst of it (I know, I said the last part was the worst of it, but it really wasn't, this is ... trust me). Because you see he ALSO boasts in his sig that he currently owns the sig file of ... wait for it ... Croda! Yes, Croda, who is not only the possessor of a stellar 6/19/0 record but HAS LOST TO PENG IN THE PROCESS! And to make it even worse, a loss to Croda himself is identified as almost as shameful as a loss to Peng! This is the man who created Crodaburg! Well, if I were concerned about win/loss records I suppose that's the method I'd choose, but I am a TRUE Knight of CessPool even if PeterNZer is not. But let us not cast stones, my friends, for surely even such a loathsome creature as PeterNZer is deserving of our assistance. Only a man so lacking in self-esteem and with so poor a self-image would BRAG and BOAST and PREEN to the world that he has defeated ... we three. A True Knight of the CessPool Cares Not About Such Things. Some might say that PeterNZer should be sent into exile (the current MG thread was suggested but rejected as too harsh) but I recdommend that instead we stage an INTERVENTION for the very soul (sit down Berli) of our poor, sad, and diminished former friend. I, for my part, shall not longer BOLD the name of the knight formerly known as PeterNZer until he once again joins the community of the True Knights Of The One The True CessPool. Take a stand, my friends, let us together bring him back into this community, will you do your part? Will you help in this noble cause? Please make a public statement of what YOU will do to restore the knight formerly known as PeterNZer. It is a far, far better thing we do today, than we have ever done before. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 Reality Alert! In the community service spirit of the Peng Thread, I should like to supply our more responsible members... err, well, just have at it, the lot of you... with the following: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>As we have said, we are not planning to do any more work on CM1. It is done, finished, completed. Not perfect, of course, but no game ever is. We have already delivered far more improvements and new features than any software company should be reasonably expected to produce, so no matter what state the game is in now we have gone far beyond the call of duty to the customer. It has also harmed our schedule for CM2, which must not be allowed to happen any more.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> MG Thread I believe it is our sacred duty to post this whenever some pedantic dullard brings up another long-dead, uninteresting, dead horse of a stupid topic. This was the last shovelful of earth in the MG thread's boring face, and I would like to fashion these words into a branding iron, kept glowing cherry-red in the eternal flame of Peng-dom, to thrust into the unwashed mug of all the whining simpletons who make it their business to fix this finished game. In fact, it should be wrought backwards, so they can sound out the words when looking in the mirror. Looking forward to burying you all in Russia. [ 04-15-2001: Message edited by: Mark IV ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted April 15, 2001 Author Share Posted April 15, 2001 MarkIV Well said and thanks for bringing this to our attention. NOW ... FIX THE BLOODY LINK SO IT FITS THE PAGE OR DO SOMFINK! Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phillies Phan Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 Mister Four? Mister Mark Four? Paging Mister Four. A Can of Whoopass is waiting for you in the CMHQ chatroom. PS Happy Easter Mister Four! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted April 15, 2001 Share Posted April 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I believe it is our sacred duty to post this whenever some pedantic dullard brings up another long-dead, uninteresting, dead horse of a stupid topic. This was the last shovelful of earth in the MG thread's boring face, and I would like to fashion these words into a branding iron, kept glowing cherry-red in the eternal flame of Peng-dom, to thrust into the unwashed mug of all the whining simpletons who make it their business to fix this finished game. In fact, it should be wrought backwards, so they can sound out the words when looking in the mirror. [/QB]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Interesting idea; very good in fact, but what the hell were you doing in the MG thread? Really, Mark IV, you're an old hand at this. Shouldn't you be setting a better example for us newbies here in the cesspool? I mean really, some poor bastard might wander in here and think it is okay to read the outer board, YOU STUPID SOD! I had expected better from a veteran kinigget! MrSpkr [ 04-15-2001: Message edited by: MrSpkr ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 Peter beat me. (Just trying to beat you to the punch Peter) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wesreidau Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Joe Shaw: I suck at CM and hate to be reminded <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Joe Shaw, you silly little dancing verbally puking Kinigit. You are dead right. Why am I celebrating my victories over you and the other minions? It's kinda like shouting out 'look folks i stepped in a turd!' I have consequently removed your particulars from my Sig file. In other news, I have bested Elvis in mortal TCP/IP combat, even though the gamey bastiche took troops and tried to kill me with them. PeterNZ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: whole bunches of poo poo.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hey, since you're so proud of our combined win/loss record, howsabout you drop that latest issue of Fleeceboy and send me some kind of setup? The winner gets to kick PeterBeater's ass around that big red rock thingie they have down there. And the winner also gets to challenge him to a game of CM, undeserving and gamey skidmark that he is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 My rainy nocturnal tangle with Leeo has finally stumbled to a conclusion. I threw in the towel, leaving Mr. The Lion with a 69-31 victory. I beat him to the VL with one platoon, which, assisted by a 95mm Cromwell and a Daimler AC, proceeded to wreak havoc as his Sturmkompanie barrelled in. So far so good. Unfortunately, my other two platoons were miles away, effecting a cunning flank manuevre which was sure to catch him off guard, as his shadowing marksmen gazed on in wonderment. Before long I was forced off the VL. My flanking platoons tripped over one of his, and things started to get a bit messy. My second Daimler lost a duel with a Wespe, but was swiftly avenged by my second Cromwell, which subsequently died at the hands of a Panzerschreck. My infantry started killing as many of each other as of the enemy. After I'd dealt with his platoon and was ready to press on with one strong and one beat-up platoon, the latter took off, opened fire on the Wespe crew (which they'd been able to see clearly all along), and massacred each other. I was utterly gobsmacked, but eventually decided I still had a chance. Sending the remnants of that platoon on with a couple of machineguns as a diversion, I dashed my strong platoon all the way back round to my first platoon's starting positions, Cromwell in tow. To try and convince Leeo that I was still coming from the flank, I sent my remaining Daimler around the back, where it bounced a few shells off his StuH before getting blown to bits. My last ditch effort was again met by his troops. I retained the Cromwell, and as he subsequently admitted we were both badly beaten up, but I felt he'd played more sensibly than me and conceded the game. Note To Self: Avoiding friendly fire in the dark: Walk troops in line abreast. Do not run. Do not move into areas where enemy stragglers are sheltering. Best of all: Wait till morning!! PS. One of my 2in mortars was killed by a Vickers machinegun firing in the opposite direction!!! BTS, fix or do somefink!! To everyone else: Sorry, I haven't done any turns since I last posted. They're just coming... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 Whoops, almost forgot: Lorak, please record: Aitken: Digging the bullets out, trying to find any that are actually German. Leeo: Finding the rain quite refreshing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted April 16, 2001 Author Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Dalem whined the following: Hey, since you're so proud of our combined win/loss record, howsabout you drop that latest issue of Fleeceboy and send me some kind of setup? The winner gets to kick PeterBeater's ass around that big red rock thingie they have down there. And the winner also gets to challenge him to a game of CM, undeserving and gamey skidmark that he is.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>I am completely indifferent to any win/loss record, combined or otherwise. May I also remind you that Mace is the local expert on safe sex tips (i.e. tagging the ones that kick) and such references to his favorite publication should rightly be addressed to him. While it is true that no RESPECTABLE Knight of the CessPool even considers anything as plebian as wins and losses, I must remind you that MY ratio of wins to losses is greater than yours to an INFINITE degree. Nonetheless I am willing to embark upon a game with you. I have a lovely little scenario called Jabo! here that I'll fire up and ... oh wait, I've done that one. Let me see if I can find one that would be ... appropriate. As to playing PeterNZer (note that the bold has been returned as he has, at least for the moment, forsaken his unknightly ways ... or is it saken his Knightly ways?). I must determine if the change has "taken" before I consent to play someone with questionable honor. We wouldn't want to be condoning backsliding now would we? Isn't that big red rock in Ozzieland, is PeterNZer flying under false colors then? Joe [ 04-15-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foobar Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 Look at the flames spouting from the jeep in Dave Aikins post!!! They are flying from it NOT towards the sky, but simply at a perpendicular angle from the slope!!! This is a MAJOR, and it needs to be addressed immediately. Even a total dunce knows that flames and smoke flicker directly UPWARDS towards the sky. My immersion factor has been smashed. Please fix, or do somefink. I am not playing anymore until this is fixed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 I just received email from Peng that Joey Ramone had passed away. I was going to post to main board but figured this would be what Joey would have wanted (the cesspool). The first time I saw the Ramones they opened for Iggy Pop at the Tower Theater in Philadelphia. I walked out thinking they were the worst band I had ever seen. Over the next yeaar I grew to love them. Then in the summer of 1979 I was in a pizza place in Wrightstown, NJ with some friends and the Ramones walked. We played pinball with Joey for about an hour. The whole band was great to hang with and either they were stoned out of their minds or we were..that part I don't rememeber too well. I'm drinkin a long tall one for Joey Ramone tonight..He was part of what made my youth worth living. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KMHPaladin Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Leeo: OOoooo, lookee who thinks he's "keeper" of the Mutha-Beautiful thread! I'm a newbie, I admit it and acknowledge it. However, your view of the thread is as consequential to me as the tick on my dog. Your lame attempt at maliciousness is equivelant to the rat terrier that yaps at me from the parked car next to mine at the mall. I can only hope that your owners will soon roll your windows up and go have a long lunch.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> LOL. "Your lame attempt at maliciousness is equivelant to the rat terrier that yaps at me from the parked car next to mine at the mall." Touche - right back at you, ace. Back to your cage, noob... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Phillies Phan: Paging Mister Four.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Mister Four has left the building. He'll be back in a week. He will then pummel you in ways that only power tools can dream about. Have a pleasant Easter. Here's an egg, with a convenient key ring attached. Hang it from your belt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: What do you think Lucifer's favorite weapon is?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> His thingey? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: (sit down Berli)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stuka: His thingey?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> That's Flammthingy to you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FriendlyFire Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: That's Flammthingy to you!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I shall fear no Flammthingy, for lo, it is snowing. Peace on earth and hand grenades to all men. Especially Meeks. Oh yes, lots and lots of hand grenades for Meeks... [ 04-16-2001: Message edited by: FriendlyFire ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 How utterly Evil! A 'thingey' that spits fire? Good god, will those dastardly jerries stop at nothing? We have ubertanks, nebelwerfer whatsits and now Flammthingeys. And to think, the most innovative thing the Alies came up with during the war was a knife/fork/spoon combination that fitted neatly together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted April 16, 2001 Share Posted April 16, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stuka: How utterly Evil! A 'thingey' that spits fire? Good god, will those dastardly jerries stop at nothing? We have ubertanks, nebelwerfer whatsits and now Flammthingeys. And to think, the most innovative thing the Alies came up with during the war was a knife/fork/spoon combination that fitted neatly together.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Dumb Allies Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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