Gimp Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Ouch. My ass is sore just reading that. But at least my internal organs haven't spewed forth due to catastrophic rectal self-invasion. Poor MrPeng. ~Gimp Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Gimp: Dear MrPeng, Today I'm offering you a lesson in how to avoid blowing up at people in threads named after yourself. Ready? Okay, here goes. Wouldn't you much rather be joyful, quiet A MrPeng instead of angry, mouth-frothing B MrPeng? Surely everyone else here would prefer the former. ~Gimp Good Lord, what a hideous thought! A joyful, quiet Peng? I'd rather have a live weasel shoved up my arse than contemplate such a thing. For that matter, the weasel would feel much the same. Neither of us would have a clue as to how to carry on, if Peng suddenly became a cheerful, hail-fellow-well-met type. You must remember that under that crusty exterior, there lurks a heart of plutonium. Exposure should cause hair to fall out, gums to bleed, and we don't even want to think about the discharge from the intestinal system. I'm sure you mean well, young fellow me lad, but you have to think these things out. Peng isn't Mr. Rogers, and this isn't a lovely day in the neighbourhood. This is the Peng Challenge Thread, and part of the challenge is Peng himself. ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Gimp, you aptly named interloper, time for you to hobble on your way or prove yourself. The mere intimation that Peng be sanitized, dressed up in his Sunday best and trotted out on parade for all the simps (a relation?) on the board to see is ridiculous per se and the work of a mindless automaton. Peng is the pre-lobotomy R.P. McMurphy of the board ... the Bull Goose Loony of the loonie bin known as the cesspool. Now be a good little gimp and toddle off as best you can to the real people. ------------------ "Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Franko Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Hey Kitty.. "Jesusdressup" is hilarious. Frank Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Ahhh Peng..you and I have never really crossed, like traders on the spice roads we take little notice of each other, save tightening one hand on our dirks and the other on the bag of coins at our waist. Like the avoidance of the "I will work for food" vagrant that could care less about actually working our glances find only vacuity present. So you have chosen to to allow us a few words. Good. You lament amid sackcloths and ashes, and rending and gnashing of teeth and say you are bored and and the world is worthless. You decry the civility, such as passes here, as deflated virol with none of the desired bile. As if some moonshiner finds that his latest batch isn't up to par. I have never been one to unleash a flood of despicability nor do I posses facility of words. I speak in a rather passionless and contrieved way because I lack the soul of a sociopath, but more embrace the souless vacumn of the serial killer who lingers over the victim and considers the better way to flay them. So take your leave enveloped in a veil of tears or laugh mightily at seeking to provoke reaction. your games are transparent. Peng you are a vagrant toad, mightily in need of the elxir enema you obviously and patently crave. Sitting in your dingy warren, reading with bulbous eyes and wizened mien, the trite pap that we post. You have become a characture of your self, a misbegotten relic of another time ages past when the words you wrote meant something. When is the last time you actually wrote anything that matters? When was the last time you bothered yourelf to actually show these tadpoles what a vicious stream of conciousness can do when coupled with a talent and love of the written word? In a word, so to speak, it's been a long time. Don't lecture us about how things aren't the way you think they ought to be. Get down here with the sociopaths and psychotics and loonies and lawyers and pretend like you have a spark of inspiration. Truth be told old man, your postings are irrelevant as are you. Useless tripe and uninspired doggerel. Why should it be "the Peng Thread" there is no peng here, nor has there been one for a long time. So stay in your Olympian eyrie. Sucking your Maloox and bicarb. Throw your geritol at the TV. You lack the single most important element you codger, you no longer care. Fie to you boyo, Meeks at least cares in his own twisted Messianic way, Sean cares with the gentle careess of a lover, Mace, well the sheep care about Mace. So what it comes to you twisted cartiliginous pompous and bombastic sack of [insert approriate substance here] you have about as much insight, value and intelligence as Kelli on Survivor 2. you are our nightmares vampire, sucking our precious bodily fluids and essence and complaining that we do not have enough blood to satisfy your cravings. Begone or stay, but embrace the passion and be, for once worthy of your name. I remain your humble servant jd, Esquire ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 02-02-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Nothing to see here move along: too damn late [This message has been edited by jd (edited 02-02-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mensch Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by David Aitken: All right, who let mensch out of his straight jacket? I'd tell you but then you would have to take these dried frog pills too!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mensch Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 YA! peng is giving up! wadda suck! I guess his full General Lee beard made him a week mamas boy... jeeez what a cry baby... I guess since he didn't mention our game.. I WIN?? auto surrender? how nice!!! LORAK you hear this.. come here boy and take that peach out of your ear. It appears Peng is giving up! well till I smell something rotting (his corpse) I'll take the win. foo! well Jdsndorsef.. or what ever his name is took my challange.. and thanks to berli for the "pushing on" mission.. I am now in heaven and will give Jiffy a real american fourth of july!! gunuboy, I dispise you.. picking on hapless zooks... crewl man, evil, aahh! no wonder the germans have no word for "fluffy" they just be plain evil. stuka!!!!! hello??? anyone home??? jeez were is that boy? croda... I hate you second after germanlad, why.. the git must have found a buy one get fourty Zooks Free sale! jeez I have never seen so many rockets flying since I first discovered rockets!!! ------------- www.derkessel.com Home of „Die Sturmgruppe“; Scenario Design Group for Combat Mission. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterNZer Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Notice I have some good news, and some good news. 1) I'm going away skiing 2) This means I don't have to talk to you lot. It also means I can't send turns. I will be back next sunday. I expect to maybe return the files I have already, but that's it. I expect my mail box to be full when i get back, full of dooooom for you horrible lot, (except for Chrisl who has been sacrificing virgins to Cthuhlu again and who is a complete bastard). And Meeks, I expect a file from you, or a surrender. ta PeterNZ ------------------ "Patriotism is the virtue of the viscious" - Oscar Wilde "Don't F*CK with Johnny Cash!" - Chupacabra Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chupacabra Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by MrPeng: Yap yap, poor me. You guys suck, I'm going home. Er, when was the last time you posted here, December sometime? My hippy parents used to say, "If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem." To which I would add: "And stay out, you goddamn dirty longhair." Your name lost its relevance as anything other than a semiotic marker here a long time ago. For Chrissakes, you sound like Archie Bunker. "Ooh, those lousy black guys ruining my neighborhood..." A hit and run Penging is better than none, I suppose, but if you're going to criticize the Pool for being lukewarm, you could try not being such a limp-wristed nancyboy yourself. I mean, insulting Seanachai for being long-winded? Gaw-lee. I appreciate Seanachai jokes as much as the next guy, but come on. That's pretty much a no-brainer, isn't it? Grow a pair, stop mewling like Hiram's cat after "bath time", and be useful. Or not. As for the rest of you - Unless my computer problems clear up, my plan is to finish my current stack of games, but not to take any new ones after that. Sorry gimps, the Chupster's off the market. ------------------ Soy super bien soy super super bien soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Kitty: Meow Meow Go Flyers!! Woo Hoo!! Flyers Flyers Flyers ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Kitty: I made you mad, I made you mad. Neener neener neener. =P Kitty Mad? Certainly not. I just got giddy to be able to get an email from you AND be able to speak your name in a post. ------------------ WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! - THIS SIG FILE BELONGS TO A COMPLETE FOO. MR T WOULDN'T BE SO KIND AS TO WRINKLE AN EYEBROW AT THIS UNFORTUNATE BEING. PLEASE OFFER HIS PARENTS AND COHABITANTS ALL SYMPATHY POSSIBLE. MAY BE CONTAGIOUS. CONTAINS ARTIFICIAL SWEETNER, INTELLIGENCE AND WIT. STAND WELL CLEAR AND LIGHT WICK. BY ORDER PETERNZ Damn Croda. That is one funny sig!!! must suck to be you - Hiram Sedai Croda, you rock! - Meeks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by MrPeng: Long, whingeing rant Keee-ripes, that's almost as mediocre as some of the crap I post. And as a taunter of limited ability, that's about a cruel a taunt as I can make. Originally posted by Chupacabra: the Chupster's off the market. Dammit! And I was all set to unfavorably compare the Clash to Heaven 17 and Wall of Voodoo... Agua Perdido ------------------ Feel the pain of outlaw cinema! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iskander Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by MrPeng: ...the only thread that matters. --> Spot on, boy! If your post had stopped here I wouldn't have responded! Call me an old fuddy duddy... --> No, I'm going to do worse... This? This is the...thing...that the Mutha-Beautiful Thread™ is named for? I’ve wasted seconds of my life that could have been better spent dead doing compositions in the name of this dewy-eyed Narcissus? I’ve read rants like this before, outside of these hallowed, ice-covered walls of the CanadianIglooFormerlyNamedForPeng…and most of them were written by self-abusing swine like Gunny Bunny. Tell me, MISTER Peng, how did you find time away from doing those stretching exercises that you hope will one day allow you to suck yourself off? Or did you finally snap your bread-stick neck trying, and when it limply (there’s a subject I’m sure you’re familiar with) fell forwards and struck the keyboard, that toe-cheese of a post got banged out? I’ve given you too much of my attention already...I would rather work than deal with your drivel again. Ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 I can't be the only person who actually gets what Peng wrote. Anway...here is my translation of his grumblings: He is not taunting any more. Okay? You people are more dense than the Hurtgen forest but not as deadly. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Gimp: Ouch. My ass is sore just reading that. But at least my internal organs haven't spewed forth due to catastrophic rectal self-invasion. Poor MrPeng. ~Gimp On my long list of things I don't want to read about, that is #39. Email him to send your pity. Send him a card with a dollar in it. Send him your picture to stop him from feeling so bad for himself. Find a friend and go away. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hakko Ichiu Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Welly, welly, welly, what's it going to be then, eh? Pengy, our starry droogie, has gotten his neezhnies all twisty-like and his yarbles caught in the confusion. And now that charming devotchka, Kitty, has told him to stick a bolshy, spiked shlaga up his sharries. No wonder he wants to run off on his oddy knocky, eh? But Pengy thinks things are baddiwad in the Pooly wooly. Thinks the shaika s gone a malenky bit soft and let in too many new chellovecks who crark a lot of gloopy shoom. And maybe so, says I. Not a lot of horrorshow taunting, none of us being truly, excellently sarky while sticking in the nozh, or doing the creative with old Ludovico or Billy, just a lot of bolny creeching about dunging and doing the old in-out-in-out with lamby-wambies. And I know Seanachai govoretts a lot of yarbles. Maybe so. But Bog, where was Pengy while all this was happening, eh? Peeting his warm moloko all on his oddy knocky 'cause he's too poogly to do the ultraviolence in the 'Pool, says I. Makes we want to give him a bolshy tolchok in the zoobies. Makes me bolny, it does. Pengy needs to get his sharries back in the 'Pool and show us he's got the yarbles for it, says I. He owes us a bolshy appy polly loggy, if you asks me. That's my lomtick on the matter. What's it going to be then, eh? ------------------ Ethan ----------- "We forbid any course that says we restrict free speech." -- Dr. Kathleen Dixon, Director of Women's Studies, Bowling Green State University Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Kitty: Something wonderful. Thank you, Kitty, that was bilious and hateful enough to make my liver flukes dance little jigs of delight. More please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chupacabra Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: The obvious. Thanks for the clue, Professor! Now off to rescue the kids! ------------------ Soy super bien soy super super bien soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Chupacabra: Thanks for the clue, Professor! Now off to rescue the kids! "You, yes you. Stand still laddie!! You can't have any pudding until you beat your meat. How can you have any pudding if you don't beat your meat?" -Pink Floyd The Wall ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal [This message has been edited by Hiram Sedai (edited 02-02-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iskander Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Hakko Ichiu: Welly, welly, welly, .... Wow, can't recall the last time I heard that much nadsat in one sitting...makes me thirsty for some synthemech, vellocet or drincrum (IIRC).... And yes, I'm sure we all got the point of that-guy-we-wont-mention-again-'cuz-he'll-cry, it was not so much his leaving, but the manner in which he did it.... ------------------ "I send you a kaffis of mustard seed, that you may taste and acknowledge the bitterness of my victory." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 New tactical infantry weapon. Superb! http://www.ilovebacon.com/toys/020101.shtml ------------------ Your name here! Please post your submissions by replying to this ad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by Hakko Ichiu: Welly, welly, welly... I do so hate to say anything nice about anyone in this festering pit, but... anyone this familiar with A Clockwork Orange has to be all right Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Originally posted by MrPeng: Lawyer - holy mother of god but this guy has lost all touch with reality. The whole, "I'm a Warshington Lawyer, and aren't I pretty and wealthy? Doesn' that make me so cool and you so jealous?" Well, Spanky, it may have slipped your attention but the majority of the farging iceholes who post to this worthless thread are greasy foriegners (with their smelly cooking and bad hygeine and rabbit-like breeding habits), so your whole personna to them is about as enticing as, well, a goddam prissy narcissistic Washingtone lawyer. And to those of us who count ourselves as Americans, we hate you inside the beltway scum, or did you miss the last 30 years of political news coverage? We send politicians and their lawyers to that unholy dumping ground because we can't stand to have your type in our neighborhoods. We pay you to stay there because you are all so vile. I'd rather be poor and only have to look at photographs of you, than be wealthy and live next to you and so would 99% of normal humans. Peng Dear INSERT [Mr. Peng]: Thank you so much for taking time to express your views to me on this important issue. I will keep your thoughts in mind as I continue to represent the interests of you and all my constituents here in Washington. Without the participation of valuable citizens such as yourself, we cannot as a Nation hope to deal with the pressing matters you mention. I feel it is my duty to reply to you personally regarding your concerns. Too many Americans believe that Washington is not interested in their problems. By this note, I hope to impress upon you that we are indeed listening to what you say, taking appropriate actions to meet your concerns, and promoting the goals that we all share for ourselves and our children in this great Nation. With your help and support, I will press ahead with the important agenda you have thoughtfully set forth. But I cannot do it alone. Unfortunately, there are many in the United States and abroad who seek to undermine the values we both hold dear. I can be even more effective in protecting you and your family from assaults on our values if you are able to make a donation to the FRIENDS OF LAWYER FOUNDATION. To accommodate all levels of participation, we have posted the following list of suggested donations. We accept major credit cards and cash -- $10,000 and above -- Lawyer's Best Friend. This highest level is for those who wish to come to Lawyer's home, enjoy complimentary beverages, and play a friendly match of Combat Mission with Lawyer himself. Lawyer understands that winning is important if America is to remain competitive in the global economy, so your status as Lawyer's Best Friend assures that he will graciously assist in letting you win the match. $5,000 -- Lawyer's Pal. This level of participation guarantees that Lawyer's secretary will return your call. You also receive a framed and personally inscribed picture of Lawyer with your digital image inserted next to him in a way that looks perfectly natural. Most of Lawyer's Pals also get to play an internet match of Combat Mission with him, to the extent his busy schedule in Washington permits. $1,000 -- Lawyer's Acquaintance. This level of participation is for people who wish to receive a personal nod or a hand wave from Lawyer if he sees them on the street. An affordable option that comes with the promise of personal recognition from Lawyer himself, the Lawyer's Acquaintance level is popular with many of the people from your walk of life. $500 -- Rides the Subway with Lawyer. This level offers hope that Lawyer may ride the same train with you if his limousine breaks down. Intended for people in lower economic circumstances, you still get a chance to particpate in our mutual cause. Below $500 -- Lawyer Doesn't Know You. This is the starting level that lets you contribute something in the hope that someday your contributions will increase substantially. Again, thank you for contacting me on this matter. I certainly hope that this personal note will be the start of a long and fruitful relationship in pursuit of common goals defining us as Americans. Your Public Servant, Lawyer ------------------ Only the Lawyer knows what Evil lurks in the minds of men.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MrHappy Posted February 2, 2001 Share Posted February 2, 2001 Well well well. Looks like old Peng set the cat among the pigeons that time! I must get word to him that several people got off their arses and posted in worthwhile ways! Happy Happy HAPPY day. Even I, the always bright, chipper and, gosh darn it, HAPPY MrHappy had gotten bored with the 'pool, and in just 12 hours some really fine taunts have been made, well, except of course for Kitty's which was just gross. Vivid, but gross. But that's OK CUZ its time to get HAPPY MrHappy ------------------ MrHappy sez, "C'MON GET HAPPY!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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