David Aitken Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 God that was awful. Four weeks with a tiny Compaq goldfish bowl of a monitor while my Apple 17" was employed on the Dark Side. Almost as bad as the work itself. Never again. ------------------ This allows me to consider my Draw a Major Victory, according to the modified curve standard in use by the World Massacre Association. – Mark IV Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 Originally posted by Elvis: So that is why you have been avoiding games with me Mace!!! You're looking for an easy win like Hiram. You have heard that I embarrased the likes of Peng, Germanboy, Kitty, Moriarty and Goanna. And have a plus .500 win percentage with everyone else. It's all very clear to me now. Ok, Ok! Don't get your knickers in a twist! We all know you're a gamey mongrel who's cracked the PBEM code and can determine your opponent's force mix and position with the mere glance of the text file!! It will be my extreme pleasure to whap you around the ears with a game, and to teach you a lesson in humility by giving you a sound thrashing. Either that, or loosing so badly to you that I will accuse you of cheating (oh wait, I just did), and/or insulting you out of spite by comparing you to the likes of Mensch. Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: You want a piece of me? You'll have to do better than that. dee bye dee dee bye dee Hiram, You're right! What was I thinking?! Challenge you? Why..why..WHY..you're just too easy and no challenge for my vastly superior intellect! Now why don't you sit in the corner and put the dunce's cap back on, while the rest of us treat you with the usual contempt that you rightly deserve! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wildman Posted February 5, 2001 Share Posted February 5, 2001 Scanning the Net and apparently several of the CessPoolers have gone and gotten themselves in the Darwin Awards. Since we happen to reside in Canada, land of "Who Cares?", I'll start with. Forever Babra, A young Canadian man from Newfoundland, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister. I'm not sure who this is, the description fits SOOOO many Poolers. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6'2" tall and weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing military gas mask that had the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow wooden tube approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into his rear end for reasons unknown, and was the cause of his suffocation. Police found the task of explaining the circumstances of his death to his family very awkward. And for Frenchie, A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her car on a highway near Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously injuring her passenger and killing herself. As a commonplace road accident, this would not have qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not for the fact that the driver's attention had been distracted by her Tamagotchi key ring (Japanese "Virtual Pet"), which had started urgently beeping for food as she drove along. In an attempt to press the correct buttons to save the Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost her own. I know we've taken the Peng thread intergalactic, but this is just over-the-top. --- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Wildman: A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6'2" tall and weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing military gas mask that had the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow wooden tube approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into his rear end for reasons unknown, and was the cause of his suffocation. Police found the task of explaining the circumstances of his death to his family very awkward. --- I wasn't aware we had English Toorie politicians regularly contributing to the pool?! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Wiltedman Stop searching the bloody net for porn and short, perverse news stories that, when compared to you, appear like feckin' geniuses, and send me your grovelling surrender, pansy. Do you understand? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Mark IV: ME PLAY MORIARTY. MORIARTY NO PLAY ME. HE DRUNK AGAIN. Aye, ya simpering sot. If you'd checked your e-mail, you'd have seen the turn, boy-o. By the by, I was at work ... wishing I was drinking Scotch. ------------------ "Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wildman Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Ratamusminimus, You are barely at the VLs now and that is with an allout charge of 4 Shermans, 1 Easy Eight, 8 M3's, 3 M8, 4 Jeeps, and a partridge in a pear tree. All by what turn 7 or 8. Good Lord, you only had to advance 400m before you were at the VLs. My only question is what the hell took you so long. You will continue to receive my piecemeal counterattacks until your out of ammo, then, and only then shall I sweep you off the map. Croda, has placed his Stug-o-Death well. I'm going to get it eventually, however, its going to be like porking a hedgehog (down Mace)...very interesting. GITom, the gamey bastard, has bought a Croc Flamethrower on a hilly, woodsy map. An ultimate in gameyness. To compound his obvious cheating, he placed it on my lightly defended flank, how rude! Marlow. You said you'd be gone until last Saturday. WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU, YOU FECKING LOW-LIFE SCUM!!! --- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Elvis: So that is why you have been avoiding games with me Mace!!! You're looking for an easy win like Hiram. You have heard that I embarrased the likes of Peng, Germanboy, Kitty, Moriarty and Goanna. And have a plus .500 win percentage with everyone else. It's all very clear to me now. Point of order, you East Coast neanderthal. I opened up a big can of whup on you in Villers-Bocage Tiger and you ain't anywhere near victory in our current game. Gah, the only embarrassment was your setup. To date, you still are (and will remain) 100 percent loser against me. * Edited to add insult. ------------------ "Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line [This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 02-05-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 move along. nothing to see [This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 02-05-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bauhaus Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Germanboy: Edit: why bother... As for a choice of opponents when one is in the need of a string of victories, Bauhaus comes highly recommended, with the Germanboy Stamp Of Approval. and here I thought you guys forgot about me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Yes it is true, Moriarty, you beat me in the Villagers nonsense but I have knocked you around in every other game we have played including our current game in which you are so afraid of me you send me files only once or twice a week. You, sir, are a yellow coward and a swine. You should be ashamed of yourself. ------------------ "When they finally put you in the ground..I'll stand on your grave and tramp the dirt down" Elvis Costello Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 They say Big is Better..... Here's a chance to see. No puny low end systems should apply. Pool offer only....... There is a LARGE scenario, Cinetheaux based on Operation Totalize. If Big is your thing this looks like it. If interested, drop me a line, even current opponents, and we can discuss. As mentioned above, this offer is for pool folks only. So if you dare..... ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Ahh, losers. Just to advise you that I have been writing the game updates down. Sadly Yahoo in thier great wisdom is not allowing me to update anything this evening... so don't bug me. Busy weekend, but I finally got all my turns out today. I hope the ugliness that are my tactics found you all well. Now... quick question. Since I am so into grog porn I bought a web cam today. Does anyone else here use one? If so I could post a conference list on my site too. Lorak the loathed. ------------------ "Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats Cesspool Combatmissionclub and for Kitty's sake =^..^= Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Hem. It seems this was not the weekend I should have picked to upgrade my system software. The result, I spent the entire weekend alternately cursing Apple and AOL, but, upon mature reflection and much trouble-shooting, I apologize to Apple and scream j'accuse! at AOL. I am presently, and have been since Friday night, without email or internet service. My opponents (such as they are) have not received turns, nor could I collect theirs. I could not read, nor post to the Peng Challenge Thread. I could not send emails to many awful human beings instructing them to cease doing anything that annoys me. I now find that there was an outburst of...let us call it very ill-mannered high-spirits here in the Thread. It seems to have passed, and things have returned to normal. As it should be, we will weather this storm, and return as hated as ever. Glad to see that everyone has kept their grip. Now, we have, in addition to this most beloved of fatal shores a new place to post, provided by the wily Croda (it would be Croda, now wouldn't it?). There, those who feel the need to go quite beyond the pale of the day to day taunting, and venture into topics whose vulgarity or viciousness might sterelize lab rats, can swan on over and unleash their most loathsome instincts. I might wander by there myself. Or I will, as soon as I am actually able to get bac online. Currently, I am restricted to access at work, and then only if I stay here late. Right now the maintenance people are rolling their ashcans through, emptying the bins and tidying up unattended copies of software CDs, and giving me that look reserved for people who apparently have no lives, and no warm and caring 'other' to hurry to when the long work day is done. This is not, of course, a look of sadness, nor commisseration, nor even pity. It is the look of 'you pathetic loser, isn't there some place you could be besides this empty, overlit office with only the cleaning staff to give a quick nod of acknowledgement to your existence? Die a lot now.' How sad. I shall now shuffle home, perhaps stopping at some tacky newstand, there to buy the latest, flimsy and poorly printed copies of 'Grog Porn', 'Grog Porn XXX' and 'Hot Young Teen Grogs'. That, and a bottle of something so cheap and vile that even Peng Challenge Thread posters would rather go sober than touch. Later, this night will find me sitting in front of a computer with no internet access, glassy eyed and lonely, singing "Take Her In Yer Arms And Show Her That Ya' Love Her" amid broken glass and crumpled and shredded glossy paper, watching the CM intro movie over and over and fantasizing about...well, it might not be politic to say. Ta' all, must sod off before the liq closes... ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 That was beautiful man. Now for heaven's sake get a life. I highly recommend you sell your computer and pass your time by going for walks in the fresh air or communicating face to face with other human beings. I can assure you, from extensive experience, that computers are a waste of time and money, and half of the effort expended in front of a computer is to simply keep the damn thing working. Unless you are bauhaus, in which case we won't discuss expended effort in front of computers. And computer games are a waste of time... huh? Matt? What are you doing here... what is that, chlorof..MMFFLE!!! I believe what David was trying to say is that time NOT spent playing computer games, Combat Mission in particular, is wasted. Except where earning money to afford computers and copies of Combat Mission is concerned. David needs a rest now, I think... Madmatt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Seanachai: Hem. It seems this was not the weekend I should have picked to upgrade my system software. The result, I spent the entire weekend alternately cursing Apple and AOL, but, upon mature reflection and much trouble-shooting, I apologize to Apple and scream j'accuse! at AOL. I am presently, and have been since Friday night, without email or internet service. You don't have a computer. You've got an outdated hippie lifestyle replacement called a Mac. I'll be you've got one of those cute Apple rainbow decals on the back of your Volvo station wagon too. Try that in DC and you'll have more Rainbow friends than a dog has fleas or Croda has crabs. ------------------ Some days the sun just don't shine up a dog's behind. -- Catfish Hunter [This message has been edited by Lawyer (edited 02-05-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Elvis: So that is why you have been avoiding games with me Mace!!! You're looking for an easy win like Hiram. You have heard that I embarrased the likes of Peng, Germanboy, Kitty, Moriarty and Goanna. And have a plus .500 win percentage with everyone else. #2, #6, #7. K ------------------ Hamsters at War! Chicks With Tanks Lorak's FTX "I'd rather the Bees than your Mask of Shame." - Stuka The True Blue Aussie Slang Source The Unofficial Vic Bitter Website Jesus Dress Up! The McNoldy Group Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Wildman: A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6'2" tall and weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing military gas mask that had the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow wooden tube approx. 12" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was inserted into his rear end for reasons unknown, and was the cause of his suffocation. --- "No more foul language, no more X-rated pics or site urls and X-rated pics or site urls and mo [sic] more talk of orifice penetrations." -MaddMatt K Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iskander Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by jd: They say Big is Better..... but they never said it about me. Pool offer only.......etc etc etc I'd like to say I was interested. I'd like to say that I was intrigued... But! Since you have proven yourself utterly incapable of something so simple as attaching the correct file to the correct person pile-driving your sweet-little-grandma's-life-savings-stealing-[fundament]into the soil of Flanders, it is completely unlikely that you would be able to effectively lift your scaled eyes from the Para.6, Section IV, Clause 3c(xviii) of the ABA's "How to Live Like a Bloodsucker" to RETURN A FILE PROPERLY! At your leisure, of course .... ------------------ "I send you a kaffis of mustard seed, that you may taste and acknowledge the bitterness of my victory." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by jd: They say Big is Better..... Here's a chance to see. No puny low end systems should apply. Pool offer only....... There is a LARGE scenario, Cinetheaux based on Operation Totalize. If Big is your thing this looks like it. If interested, drop me a line, even current opponents, and we can discuss. As mentioned above, this offer is for pool folks only. So if you dare..... Once again, I'll be your huckleberry. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal [This message has been edited by Hiram Sedai (edited 02-05-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Okay, listen up losers (and most of you are) Theformersquirenowalosingnon-squireCrawdad continues to attack - toujour l'audace. Very brave, very dead. His tanks lie scattered as so much chaff, used up and abandoned, he presses the attack, the last roundup, floundering as a fish thrown upon the shore above the waterline, gasping, eyes bulging, guess I better get the gaff and end it. paralegal shall be momentarily sending the AAR of his crushing loss. This was our rematch, in a tailor made scenario of his construction. Unfortunetly he seems to have no concept of snow warfare. He has also been shown the value of a Hvy weapons platoon and it's Mg's Frenchy and I are stumbling in the dark. His flank turned we have no idea where things are. Obviously the fix is in because his arty fell "only" on my troops with no direct los possible. He has demonstrated the famous Gallic disdain by shelling his own troops as well. RickShaw is causing me concern. His 4 panthers took out 2 shermans, losing 1 in the process. Some surprises await, but I fear this map is too big to effectively defend. Chuckie666's (promoted to italics) men are running for the back. The inital pool scourging being applied, he will soon learn his place at our feet. jsffffffffff & Wehrmachtboy are still early, Pillocks and Ewelover owe turns, Melbatoast is on hold till he restores his isp as well as CelticBard whose game hangs in the balance, 30 turns I win, 35 turns ????? Guess who set up 35 turns the batard. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 LORAK - inscribe in the Book of Sorrows that Jake "the paralegal" has suffered topplement in the pool. Legal bragging rights and the corner office are now mine! jd - win Lawyer - Loss ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 RickShaw is causing me concern. His 4 panthers took out 2 shermans, losing 1 in the process. Some surprises await, but I fear this map is too big to effectively defend. Well here's a thought for you, perhaps if you had set up A DEFENSE AT ALL ... So far I've seen the aforementioned two Shermans ... excuse me ... FORMER Shermans ... and some poor jerk who was running for his life. And I have a few surprises left too. About time to consider an out of court settlement, Counselor? My client (Me) will be willing to settle for your surrender in lieu of destroying you entirely! Joe Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted February 6, 2001 Share Posted February 6, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: About time to consider an out of court settlement, Counselor? My client (Me) You know about representing yourself and having a fool for a client, don't cha Joe? Foolish man. Course if you wish to cal a ceasefire at this time I'd magniminously accept it! ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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