If I Said You Had a Beautiful Peng Challenge Would You Hold It Against Me?

[OGSF]

SECOND PAGE!!!! SECOND BLEEDIN" PAGE!!!!

(Editors Note: There may be a spot of confusion due to this excellent post appearing on page 2 of the MBT. This is irrelevant and not the point. The MBT had slipped to page 2 of the entire BBS. Bastards.)

Wha' a pack o' slack-arsed poster-boys!

Ah'm cerrrtain there's bin a surrious brrreach o' protocol here....an' at least wun o' tha Sacred Rules ha' bin brrroken!

Ah' defer tae tha Just-a-car fer a rulin', but at saims tae mae tha' tha prrime slack-arsed poster-boy culprit wha' didnae meet hais Sacred Obligation as' tha thraid starter - Soonds lak a Snaize!

Bastaarrrds!

SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastardABCDJimmy

(Edited bae mah editor)

(Edited agin' cos mah editor as an idjit)

[ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: OGSF ]

[ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: OGSF ]</p>

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Ah' defer tae tha Just-a-car fer a rulin', but at saims tae mae tha' tha prrime slack-arsed poster-boy culprit wha' didnae meet hais Sacred Obligation as' tha thraid starter - Soonds lak a Snaize!<hr></blockquote> Ah, ... ummm ... I uh, I think that your post brings up several interesting points and it would behoove us to investigate the salient issu ... OH ... right, sure, Seanachai right. AND the MBT being on the second page, GOT IT! {whew, bit of a tough sled there lads}

Upon further investigation I blame the following:

Hakko Ichiu - I mean it's HIS bleeding thread ain't it? To whom much is given (i.e. TWO MBTs in a row) much is expected ... note the continuation of the biblical theme.

Mace - Silly Australian ... Trix are for KIDS! The OTHER, PRIOR MBT was clearly dead but you couldn't leave it alone could you? NOoooo, YOU had to go back and post there again just to annoy everyone.

Every Other Australian Who's NOT an SSN and Is a Member of the CessPool - First, just because it feels so good to blame the Australians again but THIRD, because they're up later than we are and THEY should have taken care of it.

Good eye OGSF ... Oh ... if I was wrong and your post was actually an DAR on some CM battle, my apologies ... I did the best I could.

{edited so I can tell someone I was an editor}

Joe

[ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]</p>

[Lars]

CMplayer, your petulant whining about a feckin draw doesn’t become you.

Well, actually it does.

That’s what you get when you to play a scenario from the Evil One.

Send another Setup, you git!

Perhaps a Rune scenario, he’s a nice guy.

[Andreas]

Well, Elvis has not been here yet (and I know why), but instead of stealing his line, I shall restrict myself to wishing that you all get a collection of 'Friends' videos for Christmas.

[CMplayer]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Lars:

Send another Setup, you git!

<hr></blockquote>

Sure. Just as soon as you admit you hacked the file and cheated your way to a draw.

[Stuka]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

First, just because it feels so good to blame the Australians again but THIRD, because they're up later than we are and THEY should have taken care of it.

<hr></blockquote>

Don't blame me buddy, it was my works' christmas party on saturday night followed immediatley after by a freind's 30th b'day party.

I'm not quite sure what I ended up drinking, it might have been either paint stripper or battery acid, but I know the sun was up when I fell into a coma.

I don't remember being in any trees though.

[Seanachai]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka:

I'm not quite sure what I ended up drinking, it might have been either paint stripper or battery acid, but I know the sun was up when I fell into a coma.

I don't remember being in any trees though.<hr></blockquote>

Neither did Peng. Fortunately, we had photos. And he was, for the most part, drinking aged and relatively expensive Scotch. At least until he and Shandorf went off to the bar at the hotel where Peng was staying. At which point, I believe, in an attempt to show the waitress his inner sensitivity, he started drinking Silkie Boy drinks like Cosmopolitans, and describing to her what he'd like to do to her with various bar implements.

I do know that Berli and I were unable to get service in the hotel bar when we went to pick Peng up at the downtown Marriott.

Buggger 'em, though. They had mirrored walls in their sodding elevators. Made you feel like you were standing in there with an infinite number of drunken Berlis and Pengs. Horrible, simply horrible. Thank the gods for the infinite number of Seanachais.

[ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: Seanachai ]</p>

[Lars]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by CMplayer:

Sure. Just as soon as you admit you hacked the file and cheated your way to a draw.<hr></blockquote>

It wasn't necessary.

I was playing YOU.

[Hanns]

Well I've noted this new incarnation of the MBT so far is free of the insipid taint of PottyJeff and his loquacious non sequitur gibbering. One can only hope he has become enchanted with Mace's sheep, wandered into the desert and was eaten by wallabies or somefink. I do however offer my supine and sincere apologies to my Liege and GrandLiege for my lack of recent SitReps and/or AARs due to circumstances although not beyond my meager control are nonetheless extenuating. The facts being thus:

Ñ) I have recently been courting the attentions of a certain young lady (species sapiens, Mace!) and have thus been unable to commit as much time at home to sorting through the approximately 300 messages I get a day looking for turns.

whilst simultaneously

p) allowing a 26 year old stripper who just broke up with her boyfriend to crash in my domicile while she either alpha) tries to kill herself with massive drug use, très) discovers Jebus, Mohammed or Vishnu or finì finds another place to live and doesn't hawk my swag for more drugs.

lastly

¥ª) comforting a certain blonde friend of mine (the Olde Ones know who I'm talking about) whilst she mourns the loss of her grandfather, finds out that her "girlfriend" is an eco-feminist clothed in hotty-Catholic-schoolgirl dressing and tries to deal with her jealous, stalker, cop ex-boyfriend.

As one can make from certain assumptions and educated guesses I have been unable to devote my full attention to matters of the 'Cess. Forgive my lackadaisical loss of concentration and direction. Ever at thine beck and call (especially when it's putting a good stomping on someone)

Hanns

fecking UBB codes!

[ 12-09-2001: Message edited by: Hanns ]</p>

[Seanachai]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hanns:

lastly

¥ª) comforting a certain blonde friend of mine (the Olde Ones know who I'm talking about) whilst she mourns the loss of her grandfather, finds out that her "girlfriend" is an eco-feminist clothed in hotty-Catholic-schoolgirl dressing and tries to deal with her jealous, stalker, cop ex-boyfriend.

Hanns

<hr></blockquote>

Whoa! That would be that fairly wasted but extremely attractive blonde at Glueks named Sascha? Which cop? I also have a friend in town who's reasonable, nice ex-boyfriend is a Minneapolis cop. He might be able to pass the word, as it were.

[Panzer Leader]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hanns:

...Jebus...<hr></blockquote>

That was funny. Who is this clown?

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>I do however offer my supine and sincere apologies to my Liege and GrandLiege for my lack of recent SitReps and/or AARs due to circumstances although not beyond my meager control are nonetheless extenuating. The facts being thus: <hr></blockquote> Grandsquire that is quite all right, on occassion Real Life intrudes upon the best of us. However ... shouldn't your story (and don't get me wrong, I'd frankly prefer DARs on IT than any battle you could report) more properly be prefaced by:

Despite being a studly, 6'8" 260 pound bouncer with six pack abs and blonde hair to my shoulders and the rest of the equipment to go with that image, I've never found the occassion to send a letter to Penthouse, but recently ...

Just a suggestion, GrandSquire, and DO keep us informed.

Joe

[Hanns]

Gawk! My GrandLiege pray tell what insult have I offered thee?

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr> blonde hair to my shoulders <hr></blockquote>

Gawk! I say again. I keep my prematurely greying hair shorn close to not offer an advantage in close combat with drunk ruffians. It's a style that I learned whilst serving in the Army. Now say jshandorf might be better described with such Kato-ian locks. Along with the accompanying "pretty boy" image. I fear that I am also a tad shorter than you had described (circa 1.93 meters) and a few kilos heavier. Granted though in my younger days (Spring Break '93) to be precise I did "act" in a certain film of adult like nature. For the interest of yon PornGrogs I was the big fellow named "Maxwell Haus". Pretty sure no one else has used that name in those fandangled moving pictures. Alas 'tis a long story and not at all suitable to this forum. I did regale and entertain the Olde Ones with said tale while at Glüeks so I'll stop now. The girl that is currently living with me (damn that's scary, esp. with only a 400 sq ft apt.) was also in a few videos herself. I'll have to find out which ones as I'm sure ye bastards would rather gaze at flesh of the attractive female variety (even if it is a sheep for some of you). Cheers,

Hanns

Oh, Seanachai thanks for the offer. Drop me a line off board.

[Stuka]

I was in a movie once myself, mind you I kept my clothes on.

It was called "Shark's Paradise" and was about some crooks blackmailing the Gold Coast otherwise they'd release giant sharks to wreck the tourism industry. I wouldn't bother looking for it at your freindly video shop, as it was a 'straight to video' B-grader.

I think, if I had maybe taken my clothes off, I would now be up there with the Stallones' and the Schwarzeneggerwerfens'.

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Gawk! My GrandLiege pray tell what insult have I offered thee?<hr></blockquote> No, no GrandSquire, blame it instead on the failing mind of your GrandLiege. As an interesting side note, my Son was recently discharged from the Marines (honorably of course) and was able to show me a promotional photo from the film of his last girlfriend while he was in the Corps. It was on the web too but I've lost the address ... damnit. He did ask that I NOT show it to his mother.

Joe

[Herr Oberst]

All right ya gits... you better sit down (yes, you too BAUHAUS) GAME REPORTS!

In the game against Seanachai... well, I placed some stuff, and I assume he placed some stuff, then I hit play. We shall finally see if he is indeed better than the AI...

In another game against Moriarty, I'm positive this [sneer]scenario[/sneer] is the result of some drunken, whoring episode by Andreas.

I'm also sure that Andreas passed out, leaving the laptop powered on, and his cheap date, (read hooker), sat down to amuse herself (after he paid for an hour and used thirty seconds) by creating a CM scenario that Andreas promptly took credit for. I suppose in a way, he did purchase it, and this scenario is "paid for" goods. Why else would weather be foggy (from alcohol no doubt) and wet (from... nevermind)?

[Joe Shaw]

Well lads, I have today taken a giant step in my continuing crusade to PROVE that wins and losses mean NOTHING in the CessPool. Yes I had done all I could previously by losing with regularity, but tonight I am pleased to announce that I Joe Shaw, Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread and CessPool Drain Commissioner have ... {could we have a drumroll please} ... LOST TO PENG!

Yes, it's true, that ultimate loss has been achieved and has proven yet again that wins and losses mean nothing in the CessPool. Mind it may not be the ULTIMATE loss, after all Croda lost to Peng IIRC, but he's gone so one must make do with the poor tools at hand.

No, no Bauhaus, no reflection on that at all ... no I was referring to tools in a generic sense ... no, you're thinking of genitals I believe ... no I'm sure yours are fine, really I take your word for it ... no, no REALLY ... {sigh} ... yes, very nice Bauhaus thanks ever so.

I'd offer the ritualtistic excuses but I'm so filled with a sense of accomplishment that I can't bring myself to do that. Thanks Peng, I'm a happy man. I'm just sorry that Lorak isn't here to put that extra special asterik by my name.

Speaking of Lorak, any word? I admit to some concern when I heard of the FACs that got killed/hurt recently.

Joe

[Mace]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka:

I think, if I had maybe taken my clothes off, I would now be up there with the Stallones' and the Schwarzeneggerwerfens'.<hr></blockquote>

I'd like to add that both are now in free falling careers.

Mace

[Andreas]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Herr Oberst:

In another game against Moriarty, I'm positive this [sneer]scenario[/sneer] is the result of some drunken, whoring episode by Andreas.

I'm also sure that Andreas passed out, leaving the laptop powered on, and his cheap date, (read hooker), sat down to amuse herself (after he paid for an hour and used thirty seconds) by creating a CM scenario that Andreas promptly took credit for. I suppose in a way, he did purchase it, and this scenario is "paid for" goods. Why else would weather be foggy (from alcohol no doubt) and wet (from... nevermind)?<hr></blockquote>

Well Herr Oberst, what can I say, apart from that you obviously would not notice a quality scenario if it came along, whacked you over the head with a sign saying ‘Quality Scenario’ and proceeded to bash your face repeatedly into the star it got awarded on Scenario Boulevard.

Let’s see, ‘wet’, hmm, could it be that it had been raining, and was rather ‘wet’ when the Ardennes offensive started? Or ‘fog’, yes, of course, nobody ever heard of morning fog where you live, which is either the Happyhappy Planet, where the sun always shines, and it rains candy, or shudder Australia, and we won’t go there.

Now be a good boy, run along and get yourself a good and well-deserved spanking from Morearty. Shoo.

Ps. I just hope you play the Germans.

Pps. Divulging more info than necessary constitutes a ‘spoiler’. Since that is probably to complicated a word for you to comprehend, here’s a translation for the moronic: you like, err, tell stuff, like, dude, and then the others, like, without playing, like, know the surprises, dude. Not cool, dude. I hope that was at a level of English where we may have some hope you can grasp at least the main point I am trying to make here.

Ppps. I hope you hate it.

[Herr Oberst]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Andreas:

...

Let’s see, ‘wet’, hmm, could it be that it had been raining, and was rather ‘wet’ when the Ardennes offensive started? Or ‘fog’

...

Pps. Divulging more info than necessary constitutes a ‘spoiler’. Since that is probably to complicated a word for you to comprehend, here’s a translation for the moronic: you like, err, tell stuff, like, dude, and then the others, like, without playing, like, know the surprises, dude. Not cool, dude. I hope that was at a level of English where we may have some hope you can grasp at least the main point I am trying to make here.

Ppps. I hope you hate it.<hr></blockquote>

You, you baboon you, just gave more away about your harlot's scenario than I did. I merely commented on the weather, and your poor choice of bed partners (next time, at least pick a girl with some tactical sense). You give weather, time and place. Sheesh.

'Tis a sad day when the weather is the linchpin of your scenario design...

Oh well, it could be worse. I could be playing against Croda again in 28m visibility...

[edited because]

[ 12-10-2001: Message edited by: Herr Oberst ]</p>

[Hakko Ichiu]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka:

I was in a movie once myself, mind you I kept my clothes on.

It was called "Shark's Paradise" <hr></blockquote>

3.5 Stars of Goodness. I assume,Stuka, that you were using your stage name, Sally Tayler. Strangely enough, Hanns's film credit doesn't show up in IMDB. Maybe Mace knows where to find more info about that sort of fine fayre.

In other news, Geier has managed to set fire to himself.

[phil stanbridge]

This is my first *ever* reply to a Peng thread. I simply do not understand anything about it.

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by phil stanbridge:

This is my first *ever* reply to a Peng thread. I simply do not understand anything about it.<hr></blockquote>Well golly, philistine, where to begin, where to begin ... perhaps ... at the beginning! Did you read the first post of this thread? No? Well go back and read it and this time pay careful attention to the single most important suggestion therein, to wit: Sod Off!!

Anyone with a member number of 2000 someodd and 120 odd posts to the board should bloody well know chapter and verse about the Peng Challenge Thread, the Mutha Beautiful Thread, the CessPool or, well, they haven't been paying attention have they?

Further, your {gag} hotmail address doesn't inspire much confidence in your stability now does it and, while I'm on the subject of addresses, your location sounds suspiciously like it's ... Australian. We've far too many of THAT TYPE around here already.

If you're just curious, there are FAQs upon the main board that I can't be bothered to find right now but perhaps if you remove the fingers of ONE of your hands from your nostrils for long enough to DO A SEARCH ... you might find something under FAQ in the subject heading ... or not, like I care.

Oh and don't forget to Sod Off! as you leave.

Joe

[Herr Oberst]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by phil stanbridge:

This is my first *ever* reply to a Peng thread. I simply do not understand anything about it.<hr></blockquote>

First ever reply.

Let me get this straight. You replied to the Peng Challenge Thread, the Mutha Beautiful Thread, the Cesspool?

Did the MBT speak to you? Did it somehow send you an EMail inviting you? Did it [shudder] invite [/shudder] you to post?

* evil glare at Seanachai *

I think not. So how, pray tell, can you reply to the Cesspool when the Cesspool, nor the 'Poolers (in a fine display of their collective genius) had never addressed you in the first place???

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>From the Book of Rules:

Aleph. Thou shalt enter not into the 'Pool without bearing a challenge of mighty taunting, for that is whole purpose of the exercise.

<hr></blockquote>

If you do (for some perverse reason) wish that the Cesspool address you, I hereby cast one vote for the following:

n) that the Cesspool clothe him in a fuzzy sheep suit

12:24pm) that the Cesspool address him to Mace's Sheep Ranch, Outback, Australia postage due.

February) that the Cesspool notify Bauhaus of the pfuzzy-phil's itinerary

[ 12-10-2001: Message edited by: Herr Oberst ]</p>

[CMplayer]

Be it known that the forces of good have assaulted Sir Panzer Leader, renowned author of the article series Defending Against the Assault, in mountainous village terrain and have achieved a Major Victory.

Allies: CMplayer 81

Axis: Panzer Leader 19

by autosurrender.

My opponent purchased a 1500 point force of SMG squads, flak guns, Hetzers and 120mm mortar spotters all of which (except for two guys who ran off the map) died or were captured by a profoundly historically accurate Ami reinforced rifle company. BTW winning is all that matters. So feh!

[edited to beat chest one extra time *thump*]

(oh and by the way Lars pulled off a draw but it was probably some kind of bug or somefink)

[ 12-10-2001: Message edited by: CMplayer ]</p>