Peng, I Am Still Taking Our Bloody Challenge Public

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Hey, whoa. Jefe is a bit overzealous but you have to understand that we Americans have had gender rights mashed into our brains. I support Pawbroon and Seanachai and welcome you to your title. However, you cannot keep playing the female card every time somebody taunts you. Also, it's not proper to complain about not being treated like a lady after growling at us to treat you like one of the guys. I thought you Scots were made of sterner stuff, my littlest sister would tear you to pieces and use your breasts (Don't worry, Bauhaus, it's coming) for ear muffs (SIT DOWN BAUHAUS!).

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I was right you have taken some Brain decreasing drug, Where did I complain about not being treated like a lady? Did I miss something or did you? Pawbroon may have complained, I just refused to have a cat fight with Kitty, Insult me all you want mate,cos your taunts are as feeble as you are and if you don't mind me pointing out, you are such a contradictory bastard, but then you are male, so guess thats fair.

MEEKS PLEASE NOTE: I AM NOT OFFENDED, I DO NOT WISH TO BE TREATED LIKE A LADY BY ANY OF YOU LOT, (EXCEPT THE OBVIOUS)DO NOT CONFUSE ME WITH KITTY. Insult me, do your best,but please do not put words into my mouth,and whats with the female card remark???????????

I am totally confused by your post, WAKE UP MAN ITS BEDTIME.

[bauhaus]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2:

*cough* for fear of repeating myself see my earlier post, And listen up fatboy, "there will be no more pies for you"

Bauhaus: "I'm not Fat, I'm big boned.....

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm sorry, but I am but a simple male. I'm not genetically trained to read things more than once.....or ask for directions when lost.

But if YK2 and Kitty do indeed fight, does that make for a ..........ummm.....dare I say......a Cat Fight? O.K. ladies, let's become sexist here for a second (sorry, that male thing again)......Oil down your tanks and let's prepare for battle. Everyone chant now....Fight, Fight , Fight........

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bauhaus:

Originally posted by YK2:

*cough* for fear of repeating myself see my earlier post, And listen up fatboy, "there will be no more pies for you"

Bauhaus: "I'm not Fat, I'm big boned.....

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm sorry, but I am but a simple male. I'm not genetically trained to read things more than once.....or ask for directions when lost.

But if YK2 and Kitty do indeed fight, does that make for a ..........ummm.....dare I say......a Cat Fight? O.K. ladies, let's become sexist here for a second (sorry, that male thing again)......Oil down your tanks and let's prepare for battle. Everyone chant now....Fight, Fight , Fight........

LMFAO................... what can I say??

[jshandorf]

Ooo! Ooo! Tell me how you are gonna pin down Kitty and make her purr for mercy!!

Jeff

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jdmorse:

YK2 I am glad we have a Lady of the Pool, for who else can true kniggits dedicate their quests to....very Aurthurian. Course Kitty is welcome to preform topplement if she can. In this brave new pool of ours it runs red with blood from tooth and claw.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

At last, Someone who actually manages to keep abreast of the plot. A true Kniggit if ever I saw one, now be a sweety and fetch me Meeksies head I fear for his sense of humour.*Ahem*

MEEKS TO GERMANBOY; Join in the fun...........

[Hamstersss]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2:

Yap yap yap.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Classic feminine aggression, first used by the Mongols in the 12th century and stereotyped by Xena. Look, lady, I could whip you like a rented mule, in CM or out. I can and do out-taunt, out-posture and out-swagger you on a regular basis. To me, you're nothing more than a Croda with tits. My topplements are legendary, yours are unknown. My exploits span the real world, the 'Pool and the khaki forum, yours only consist of sleeping with a crazy Frenchman. You are the Sancho Panza to my Don Quixote, the straight man to my Charlie Chaplain, the stamped aluminum bowl holding my world-famous raisin-nut soup. Inconsistency you may say but I know my plan and in the end, all the threads will come together and I will be seen to be a modern Machiavelli, resplendant in the trappings of innumerable success.

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Meeks is correct.

-Steve, of Big Time Software, creator of Combat Mission, Vicar of Peng on Earth.

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by jshandorf:

Ooo! Ooo! Tell me how you are gonna pin down Kitty and make her purr for mercy!!

Jeff<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

well Jeff, Its late and I must sleep but I promise to give the matter some serious dream time, so good night sir Knight, and sweet dreams.

[Guest YK2]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Classic feminine aggression, first used by the Mongols in the 12th century and stereotyped by Xena. Look, lady, I could whip you like a rented mule, in CM or out. I can and do out-taunt, out-posture and out-swagger you on a regular basis. you're nothing more than a Croda with tits..

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

OMG.......... I knew it, we have a serious case of role reversal here, it was your ever so correct quote of "classical feminine aggression" that jogged my memory,(of which your own very own posts excell in) not forgetting the 12th Century Mongolian convention, what a week that was, and now its coming back to me, you had one of your drinking spells and confessed how you longed to be female........ your doing just fine Meeksie, JUST tone down the female aggression though

[Stuka]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bauhaus:

So I fart in your general direction.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

*Cautious sniff*

Hmm, smells a bit like KY love jelly, no wonder you keep wanting to stand up.....

Botty a little tender is it?

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Torture you? That...That's a good idea.

[Mace]

Gazooks!

What is with all this talk about a wench fight?

As a firm believer of equality amongst the sexes, I say we must adopt political correctness in the pool, and do away with these sexist titles (see how well it works in England, a country taking political correctness to lofty heights)!

Further, I say that this fight must not go ahead, as it debases and degrades the female gender.

Of course, if it includes mud, jelly, sticky wet, t-shirts and me as referee I may be prepared to change my mind!

Now excuse me, I have to take a cold shower!

Mace (proud keeper of the sacred handbag of combat and victim of Rune's evil experiments)

[Speedy]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Marlow:

but we need a parliamentarian to oversee the process.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

My God man, are you mad?

Never, ever let a parliamentarian do anything. Thats like asking the American people to elect a President.

Now onto to later developments, although I am a man I demand that the Judean Peoples Front fight for my right to be called Lady of the Pool!

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Work is the curse of the drinking class.

I have nothing else to say. Ya, quote that you rat bastards.

-Meeks

[Lorak]

Damn, Long ass times for page updates.. to find that my post several hours ago didn't even show up. <sigh>

Ok the short of it then.

Corrected jshandorfs record to 2/2/0

Posted Pawboon's topplement of Mensch

added the sponsors for the squires I had.

Re-worked all the damn pages on the site.

Now there is a cesspool home page that links to the others.

separate Knight page with records.

separate squire page with records and joust.

Seaparate Lords page with Current lords and contest.

Check it out. I am open for suggestions.

Lorak the loathed

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"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

[Stuka]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Speedy:

I demand that the Judean Peoples Front fight for my right to be called Lady of the Pool!

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I assume you also wish to be known as 'Loretta'?

[Herr Oberst]

jshandorf!!!

I call you out! Where, pray tell, is the next turn you scurvy mongrel. You who would rather scribe upon the bathroom walls of the 'Pool like a common street urchin.

An urchin whose parents would fling him under the wheels of a passing Lady's carriage, in a vain attempt to derive even a few pence worth from your life.

To have you trampled under hoof and wheel rather than attempt to nurture you into adulthood, nor even adolescence.

You whose parents are working desperately, dementedly, and feverishly on a time machine so they can return to a happier time before any thought of offspring had crossed their minds.

Stop posting here like a schoool child inciting a fight at recess and return to you battles... perhaps you fear your topplement.

Indeed, you have watched this past turn and have developed a nervous tic, with hollow eyes, and mumble incoherently about your armies and divisions that are no more than paper ghosts. You who cannot even start CM for fear of degenerating into a puddle of gibbering sweat and slime. You have been reduced to posting in the mother-of-all-threads in the vain attempt to convince yourself that a wity post in the thread is worth more than a victory...

Send that turn you wretch.

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To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

[chrisl]

Things are getting ugly out there in the main board again. Time to settle back into the slimy, icky, nasty, smelly comfort of the cesspool.

Update on my pool games:

Meeks is thoroughly insane, though quite creative. He seems to use TRPs like minefields. We're playing the reverse of the assault in which he crushed my ami defenders. His TRPs (actually the 3 km shells that he dropped on them) forced me to press the attack much faster than I wanted, rushing my lame little germans across the snow. I can't believe what lousy shape those guys are in-- even the vets can't run 150 m in the snow without getting all weary and whining that they don't get enough smokes. After great effort I convinced them all that if they overran meeks's positions that could have all the cigarettes they could nab. The wonderful (terrible?) thing about assaults is that even after he obliterated a large group of troops with his 10 km shells, I still have 2 full Panzer divisions and a mechanized infantry division, all smoking crack and ready to go. Meeks, on the other hand, has nothing but a chaplain and his assistant, and the assistant doesn't even have real boots. They'll die too. His topplement nears completion.

Sneezy-choo-choo: We're still on the opening dance, again in the snow. He's lost about a full battalion of Cromwells, and gotten nothing but a couple little armored cars in exchange. Sneezy will be entoppled as well.

Peng: After whining and wheezing about how boring things were for 15 or 20 turns, while I sneaked my troops up without any contact at all, he's about to be driven into the sea, wishing we were back on turn 10, when his troops were all still alive. He's hardly even had a taste of the arty...

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Slayer of the Original Cesspool Thread.

[BFCElvis]

Ms. Kitty's PBEM life with me has taken a serious turn for the worse. To refresh your weak memories she sent me a sandbag game. I haave green Polish troops in a meeting engagement which were charged with crossing mostly open ground to confront 2 Tigers, a Pz IV, some type of hafttracks and what seems to be a company of vetern German troops. Also she had a couple of arty spotters. Sounds pretty bad for the King huh? Nope. She has been held off very well by stratigic placement of my weakass troops and in the last two turns lost a Tiger and the PzIV to one of my hidden Piat teams. She of course cried foul. So I took some screen shots and have saved the movies so that she may rewiew them when we are done. If I continue to pull this off it may be my most satisfing victory yet.

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"To conquer death you only have to die" JC

[Mark IV]

Ahh, home from a hard day's work in foreign places, set down my faces-of-the-poor grinder case, turn on the light...

GOOD LORD! Look at them scurry! All over the walls, the carpet, the counter... bastards have been active while I'm away. 4 pages of perfectly good cesspoolia ruined by the pests.

(Picks up what appears to be the Chicago telephone directory): Ah! A brief note from the Cesspool founder. What says the sickly snowboy?

(Reads): "Mark IV, my lord, master, twice-spanking mentor, doomed to be forever disappointed by my failure to learn the least scintilla of a tactic, abject apologies, as usual.

"Meeks is loose and let the others out. They've gone mad, drunk up all the 409 under the sink, and fancy themselves a shadow government. Croda propped a carrot youknowwhere and declared himself divine. Pawbroom is speaking in tongues. Shandorf, odormensch, OSFG, and the others are all in on it, mocking the gods and worshipping graven images. There is a wench with them.

"I didn't know what to do, but I'll be upstairs in The Position with the covers over me head" (followed by 3279 pages of celtic literary allusions).

Hmm. The usual, just like last Thursday. Fortunately, with their attention span, it'll blow over in a day or two, just empty the roach motels and dump them back under the sink. Still... a title? Hmmm... it's tacky and trite. Other than that, there's little to support the idea. No mention of Germanboy in the note- wait, he HATES it! That settles it!

Mark IV, Emperor of the Pool, Lord of Rodentia, Viscount de Methane, Grand Marshal de Topplement, Slayer of rune the Beta Ghost, Nearly Undefeated Military Genius Except for a Couple of Cheating Foreigners, declare that I haven't the slightest interest in meaningless titles except, perhaps, Pool Wizard. With Swords, Oak Leaves, and Diamonds. And a bit of ribbon to wear on my smock covered with mystical symbols. Bit over the top, that? No, quite measured, I think they'll buy it. (preens in mirror). It's good to be me!

[Kitty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by YK2:

Blah, blah, etc. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Hehe why would anyone want a title from here? Not me. I'm no Lady anyway.

Kitty

[Hamstersss]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kitty:

Hehe why would anyone want a title from here? Not me. I'm no Lady anyway.

Kitty<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

She's a man!

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Meeks is correct.

-Steve, of Big Time Software, creator of Combat Mission, Vicar of Peng on Earth.

[Shandorf]

Eeegahds! I forgot to send Hairy Butt his turn. I remember watching the movie.. Hmmm Oops! He must be sweating a river over there. Probably has a rubber mat under his chair to keep the floor dry. Anyway...

GAME UPDATE!

The great (in his mind) Leeks was defeated by me. Thought his forces were few they were crack troops and my scrappy regulars were able to force his surrender. A major blunder on his part was placing a 150mm arty gun deeps in the woods. The poor bastards were to afraid to fire the gun in fear of killing themselves! I am sure he will be here soon to cry foul, but alas I have claimed a Major victory.

Lorak my good man! Oh such a noble and true knight, update these standings.

Meeks- LOOOOOOOOOOSER!

ME - The winner! (Pumping arms and hopping in a circle)

I am tired. I must go and sleep the sleep of the righteous.

Jeff

[OGSF]

There's noo justice an thus wirrld! Ah engage Speeeeedy in a meetin' engament an' prroceed tae implement mah furrtive and cunning plan. Ainly tae find thet Ah've snuckered mahseelf wi' mah daft burnin' o' mah hoose an kirk! Sae, Ah send mah wee laddies aroon' ta eend o' the burrnin' buldins, tae see them savagely cut doon bah a horde o' killin' machines dusgised as Yank soldiers. It'd mak mae poor wee Mam cree a wee tear fer mae!

Sae, Lorak yae keend and gentle man, will ye noo mark oop mae defeat tae the crow eatin' Speedy ain the Cesspool boarrd? Thank ye!

And noo fer a wee song....

When Ah've done mah worrk o' day

An' Ah row mah boot away,

Doon the waters o' Loch Tae

When the ev'nin light is fadin'

An' Ah gaze upon Ben Lours

Wir the after glory glowers

An' Ah Think on two brright eyes

An' the meltin' mouth below..

SANG! SANG ye scum sucking ferrets wi' the charm o' a blind mullet! Aaah, feh..

MacOberGrupenBloodyStompinFeuhrerBastard

[Kitty]

Originally posted by Elvis:

She of course cried foul.

LMAO @ you, dickhead. I did not. I said, "How does this guy see through a building? =)" Hardly qualifies as either crying OR foul. However if you recall correctly, you qualify for both. Exhibit A: You were "crying foul . . . no, BAWLING foul, about halway through this and I said, "We can always play another game if you want to, I don't mind." You called me a bitch or something and continued crying.

Exhibit B:

After reading your lame remarks in your "challenge" here, I sent you the game file that you speak of as a joke. Immediately you started crying:

This seems to be VERY unbalanced but since I don't know what you have I will have to trust it.

I replied with:

Huh? In your "challenge" to me I do believe you said, "Kitty. Send a setup file. Any type of game any side." So I did just that. Me = German armor, regular/veteran. You = Polish Airborne conscript/green. But you ought to be able to win anyway, right? I mean with you being from the superior gender and all. =) So anyway, since I'm only going by the rules YOU set, you can either play me this game or I'll have to go tell the CM public that you whined like the women you hate so much and refused to play me. Now who's schooling who?

You then sent another mail, your quotes and my replies to them are seen here:

To purposely set parameters to be lopsided is not "Now who's schooling >who? " it is called cheating.

Cheating? ROFL I call it a joke that obviously worked way better than I thought it would. If my intention had been to cheat you I never would have told you what the setup was until it was too late. I mean didn't you see all the smiles and winks in there?

I still intend to play the game to completion because I have made the best out of bad situations in the past and will certainly try to do so here.

I never seriously expected you to play it at all though! I'm more than happy to send you another file, or you can send me one. =)

But you really shouldn't let the chip you seem to have on your shoulder make you come off as petty as you seem to be.

Oh my God. =) Again, it was a JOKE. You can mkae jokes at my expense but I can't do it to you? Is that the way it works here? Talk about "petty."

If you can't laugh at yourself then you should maybe stay away from those kind of situations.

And my two cents: take your own advice. =)

Lighten up and lets play a GAME, ok?

Kitty

---------

Now back to your post...

I took some screen shots and have saved the movies so that she may rewiew them when we are done.

This from the person who, when I asked if he'd send a screenshot to me denied knowing how, with "give me a call and talk me through it." LMAO Didn't know you were into phone sex. You're a world class jerkoff and lying sack of ****. Go slander someone else and get off my leg, muttface.

Kitty =^..^=

Profanity intentionally unmasked. So what? So chastise me.

[Hamstersss]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kitty:

Censored for the sake of the children. God, think about the children!!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Eek! Serious anger in the Cesspool! How do we deal with it? Um, uh, yes. I, uh, feel your pain. You've, uh, um, really got to, uh, ya. So, uh, how about them Dodgers?

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Meeks is correct.

-Steve, of Big Time Software, creator of Combat Mission, Vicar of Peng on Earth.

[OGSF]

Winnae somebody thank aboot the wee bairns!

[Kitty]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elijah Meeks:

Eek! Serious anger in the Cesspool! How do we deal with it? Um, uh, yes. I, uh, feel your pain. You've, uh, um, really got to, uh, ya. So, uh, how about them Dodgers?

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I'm not angry. Hi, Meeks. =)

<waves>

K