Peng is Challenged by a T-90....and wins!!!!

[Abbott]

Read a couple of pages of that dreck and that was the only shiny kernel in the whole vat of poo. Hates CMSF...can't talk myself into buying the Marine module. Hence I would never have noticed this little gem.

Thanks for keeping us posted, Abbott

My pleasure Mike . I also plan to pass on the Marine module while I wait for the Normandy game. (I still have an unopened copy of Shock Force, out of the 2 copies I purchased, the first copy I gave away). By then the CMX2 engine should be running pretty good and gain the feel of a normal quality product release by BFC .

[Mace]

You are to compassion and consideration what Spiro T. Agnew was to sex appeal and elan.

So..... You're saying that you not only admire Agnew's flair but you lust after him as well?

[Seanachai]

My father was a WWII veteran, 5th. Army Airforce. I enlisted on my eighteenth birthday. My brother was a Marine.

My Dad fought in Korea. First in the Army, in the artillery, then Army Security Agency, seconded to the NSA. My Great Uncles fought in WWII, my Grandfather's older brothers. The one I knew best fought in the Pacific, a Marine. He was wounded at Iwo Jima, and sent home. My Great Grandfather was a drummer boy, in the Wisconsin Regiment, during the Civil War. An Irishman whose family came in through Canada, because their ship wasn't allowed to land in the US, because it was filled with Irish, and he fought for the North, and the integrity of the Union, and the concept of America.

I was old enough to register for the draft in Viet Nam, which I did. Never got called up. Everyone else, they were Americans, between wars, in a nation that values peace over war. They raised families, paid their taxes, voted, were part of their communities.

My Old Man always told me: 'Son, I'm never going to tell you to enlist in a peacetime army, because there's nothing there for you. If your country needs you, I know you'll do your duty. Now, tell me what you're going to do with your life...'

And then we'd fight about it. Jesus to Jesus, and eight hands around, but the Old Fella could go on about what you SHOULD be doing with your life.

I miss him, when I've had a few, and contemplate the fact that nowadays, we'd probably be great friends.

He had a wicked sense of humour, the old bastard.

[Seanachai]

And now, a 'Tale of Small Friends', for the Faithful. Everyone else, just move on.

The other day I was at my friend Jen's, and our friend Christine was visiting after work, as well. It was a steamy, late summer day, and while Jen and Christine were talking and drinking vinho verde as Jen watered her plants, I was being Der Gute Grandma Steve, and, with garden scoop in one hand, and the trash bucket in the other, I was making sure there was no dog ****e in the yard so that Small Friends could romp and play.

And as I was bent over, sweating, using the gardening trowel that they have, and wondering why it was as narrow as a needle, I heard a small voice shout 'Nora, Come Here! Stand by me, and let's watch Grandma Steve pick up all the nasty dog poop!'

Yes, I have become a spectator sport.

Small Emma also 'checks my work'. I don't know if it's just because she's short, and so much nearer to the ground, or if her young eyes see more, or if she has special powers, but no matter how hard I search, she always finds more dog poop for me to pick up. But that's good. Because while Emma will always be careful, her little sister is the very poster child of unconcernedly running barefoot through every pile of undiscovered dog ****e possible.

Emma is a big girl now, in the parlance of small children anxious to distinguish themselves from even younger siblings, and turned five at the end of July. I was there for her birthday party, and I gave her a DVD of 'The Ultimate Dinosaur Collection', which I got from watching the same at Dalem's place. If you've never seen it, it is WAY cool; a little short on science, but long on entertainment, and the visuals are such as to make you feel like you're watching a nature program, rather than a reconstruction based on a handful of obscure fossils and facts.

So, at the end of the Birthday party, when family members were all starting to leave, Emma sought me out, and sat next to me on the couch, and told me: "Grandma Steve, do you know what my favourite presents are today?"

And I told her "No, Emma, what?" Because, you know, she's one of the only grandchildren in either family, both of them Squarehead Lutherans with a deep and abiding love of family.

And she told me "The Dinosaur movie you gave me, and the Maria Barbie Doll (one of her great-aunts had found her a 'Maria from the Sound of Music' Barbie dolls online, and bought it for her; straw hat, guitar, post-nunnery governess dress, the whole nine yards...). And I told her I was glad she liked the movie (which she hadn't even seen, yet), and got ready to go.

And she told me "Grandma Steve, you can't go yet! We have to watch the Dinosaur Movie together!"

Now, mind you, I'd already been out kayaking and done about 8 miles that day, and was exhausted. But you can't say 'no' to that sort of request. So I stayed. And I told her "Emma, do you know what we're going to see in the first episodes?" And she shook her head. "We're going to see Bronto-Scorpius! That's a giant scorpion, that was 3 feet long!"

And she was enthralled. So I stayed, and we watched Bronto-scorpius chase primitive fish across the Silurian oceans, and she exclaimed 'Oh, I hope the poor fish escapes the giant scorpion', because when you're five years old, and about 3 feet tall, you tend to root for the underdog. And the fish got away, which made her happy. Especially when Bronto-Scorpius was eaten by and even more massive arthropod.

But after watching for a while, scooted up next to me on the couch (Maria, the 'Sound of Music' Barbie doll was sitting on the other side of her), she suddenly said, all serious 'Grandma Steve? What if I fell in that water with the giant scorpions'?

There is no point in telling a child who is contemplating monsters that they've been extinct for 350 million years, give or take a few, so I told her, "Then I would jump into the water after you, and get you out."

"But what if they were attacking me?"

"Then I, and Mommy, and Daddy would fight them, and rescue you."

"But what if they'd already stinged me?"

"Then we would take you to the hospital, and they would give you anti-venom, and make you all better."

A period of reflection, while considering the giant scorpions on the screen, and then she tells me: "Yes. The doctors would make me all better."

And then she settled back into watching the 'Dinosaur Movie', rooting for the innocent dinosaurs, and upbraiding the nasty dinosaurs, secure in the knowledge that she wasn't a part of anyone's food chain.

Her Mom told me later that she had a nightmare about dinosaurs, but then, she also was running a fever at the time. The 'Dinosaur Movie' has been moved up into the 'big tv room' for the immediate future.

But we will watch more of it together. Because nightmares are just nature's way of telling you that there are things you should be afraid of. And Mommies and Daddies have to worry about nightmares. But the world also gives you 'Grandma Steves', whose job is to tell you: Hey, we're going to kick the SNOT out of those naughty bad giant scorpions! Who goes with Fergus! C'mon, I'll dance in front of the bugger, and you slip 'round behind him, and stab him with this spear!'

Of course, when you're dealing with small children and their parents, you don't emphasize stabbing things with spears. Because that could be misapplied to Real World situations.

But hey. A child that size is never going to have the leverage or power to crack a carapace with a mace, not to mention needing to get in too close, so the only real option for her is a spear. Something you can run in between the joints of an exoskeleton, and do some serious damage, while remaining outside the 'pincer and tail spike' zone.

That's the kind of thing you need a Grandma Steve for. It may all be make believe, but kids are a lot more into the details than you'd think.

Besides, another 8 years like we've had under George W., and the ability to battle giant scorpions might be more of a life skill, and less of a video game concept...

[Stuka]

I miss him, when I've had a few, and contemplate the fact that nowadays, we'd probably be great friends.

Dammitt Seanachai, why do you always make with the tear jerkers?

My dad's been gone 12 years now and its still a wound thats fresh.

[Seanachai]

Dammitt Seanachai, why do you always make with the tear jerkers?

My dad's been gone 12 years now and its still a wound thats fresh.

That's the bitch, Stuka. Whether you loved him, or hated him, or finally made peace with him, you live longer than him. Long enough to realize that you understand him better than you ever did when he was alive, and long enough to realize that there's a lot more of him in you than you ever would have thought. Or than he would have thought. Or maybe even than you would have wanted.

Sometime, maybe, if you're good, and ask nice, I'll send you an email about my First Father's Day after he died. It's all just chock full of all that useless human baggage: regret, understanding, sorrow, anger and release.

Also, a certain amount of drugs, and a penny whistle. Also, vomiting.

The penny whistle is what makes the story.

[Michael Emrys]

My dad's been gone 12 years now and its still a wound thats fresh.

There, there, lad. You're not the only boy who was abandoned by his dad. I'm sure it must have made it hard to face your mates at school. No wonder you dropped out before your education was complete, as painfully shows now. I can see how the shame of it all drives you to such a suicidal frenzy at times with your big trucks and big cigars.

Michael

[Stuka]

If I ever do contemplate suicide Michael, I want you to know that it will be a murder-suicide.......most likely at your place.

[Boo Radley]

So..... You're saying that you not only admire Agnew's flair but you lust after him as well?

Tilts head to one side and looks at Mace as if he's just discovered a new and completely distasteful species of slime mold.

No.

You should probably think about replacing your copy of "Australian to Regular English As Spoken by the Saner Parts of the Bloody Globe" Dictionary with something not quite as drool covered.

[Berlichtingen]

If I ever do contemplate suicide Michael, I want you to know that it will be a murder-suicide.......most likely at your place.

Just remember, murder first. Figured you bein' an Oddstralian, you'd get it bass ackward

[Lars]

And as I was bent over, sweating, using the gardening trowel that they have, and wondering why it was as narrow as a needle, I heard a small voice shout 'Nora, Come Here! Stand by me, and let's watch Grandma Steve pick up all the nasty dog poop!'

Yes, I have become a spectator sport.

You do parties?

Cuz I'm having a kegger on the 20th and I think you'd be a real hit.

[Boo Radley]

You do parties?

Cuz I'm having a kegger on the 20th and I think you'd be a real hit.

Just be warned. He may pick it up, but he's been known to fling the stuff, too.

[Lady Redneck]

Maria Barbie Doll (one of her great-aunts had found her a 'Maria from the Sound of Music' Barbie dolls online, and bought it for her; straw hat, guitar, post-nunnery governess dress, the whole nine yards...).

I am sure she loved it, after all it probably had the same dress on as you did, Gramma Steve.

Lady Redneck

[Abbott]

Besides, another 8 years like we've had under George W., and the ability to battle giant scorpions might be more of a life skill, and less of a video game concept...

Yeah, Nobama will give us care bears and flowers and communes and girlymen and nannies oh my!

Giant scorpions would spin-off all kinds of fun sports and hobbies. I for one would enjoy 4-wheeling in the desert (which used to be Minnesota) climbing dunes and blasting giant bugs. Damn, that reminds me Fallout 3 is available for pre-order!

[Patchy]

Thanks for the Small Emma and Nora story Gnomey.

[Stuka]

Yep, I enjoyed it too and the two trolls are going to 'ignore' for me.

[Stuka]

If I can figure out how do do the damned ignore settings....

[Abbott]

If I can figure out how do do the damned ignore settings....

Actually Stuka I wasn’t trolling, I was posting humorously. But if you want to misunderstand it feel free.

[Stuka]

W00T! Got it!

Ahh the peace....Ahhh the serenity.

"Would you like another beer Sir Stuka"

"Why yes I would fine fellow"

"Would it be another 'Becks' Mr Stuka?"

"Why yes it would my good man"

"Have you had a good day sir?"

"Absolutely, I rid my world of two pesky varmints"

"Varmints, they are a blight on the forum aren't they sir"

"That they are young bar-keep, that they are...."

[Nidan1]

What if you just put everyone on ignore? Then you would have the whole thread to yourself, and you could post anything that you wanted, but you would never get a reply, either good or bad ones....now would that be any fun?

[Boo Radley]

I put myself on ignore AND WENT BLIND FOR TEN WHOLE MINUTES!!11!!11ONE!!

But seriously, Ed... er... Jim... whatever... here's a flyer that Jack Daniels put up at the Democratic convention:

[Leeo]

Hell, I ignore myself half the time. Ok, maybe 3/5ths the time. Did some one say fifth? Why, that's what I'll plead, may I please have another over Ice?

[MrPeng]

What if you just put everyone on ignore? Then you would have the whole thread to yourself, and you could post anything that you wanted, but you would never get a reply, either good or bad ones....now would that be any fun?

I'm going to ignore that comment, MrKneeDanWon1!

[mike_the_wino]

Gods bless the fine folks at Jack Daniels for bringing the important issues to the forefront.

[Stuka]

Coincidentally i'm enjoying a JD right now after smoking a lovely Cuban 'Trinidad' on the balconey whilst looking down at the poor people and flicking ash on their heads.

I think I saw one knee down amongst the crowd,,,,