Peng me, My challenge is dry

[Leeo]

Don't tell me you are unaware as to what this is all about.

OK, with a mouth-breather like yourself, anything is possible.

Challenge someone specific.

Pretend like you have a brain.

Talk not about your genitals.

Treat the ladies like ladies.

You deserve nothing, least of all a game from one of us.

We delight in poking SSN's with sharp sticks.

If you entertain us, we'll sharpen our sticks and prod you some more.

We all hate each other, but in a way you'll never understand or experience.

If you still are unsure, then you are catching the hang of it. You can read?

Our hate is administered without regard to race, gender, creed, or nationality. We are equal-opportunity loathers.

Someone will shortly decry this inauspicious start to yet another turning of the will. Such is the way.

Your path is best followed if you now go away. Far away. Do not look back. Pillock.

[Joe Shaw]

Yuck ... I've NEVER seen such a sloppy, half arsed rendition of the sacred rules in my life and I've seen MBTs that Panzer Leader tried to start.

Oh well, as I have zero time (hotel has this silly one hour online rule) and since I actually have to work after work I'll only say that Papa Khann is a complete and utter liar ... I think ... mostly I was concerned with the mosquitos. I claimed three downed but dalem swears the last one was still flying although he was trailing smoke from one wing.

Joe

[Leeo]

I thought I'd post something simple, something appropriate to the attention span and mental capacityof the typical SSN.

Do you need the whole bible, chapter and verse, at every Sunday school?

[wamphyri]

Probly not but it's to keep SSN's like myself from posting and expecting a NON-PENGUINITE response!

Wamphyri

[Leeo]

Originally posted by wamphyri:

drooling incompetence

Your resume applying to the post of village idiot was rejected for falling below standards, wasn't it?

[wamphyri]

Your resume applying to the post of village idiot was rejected for falling below standards, wasn't it?

Not at all .. They just felt that someone was more deserving of the title.. someone who wasn't even able to post a complete set of Rules!! Gah .. even us SSN's know better than that.. you're letting mayhem spread ..

{runs for cover}

Wamphyri

[ August 26, 2002, 11:51 PM: Message edited by: wamphyri ]

[Stuka]

Don't converse with the peasent scum Leeo, it gives them delusions of granduer.

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I'll only say that Papa Khann is a complete and utter liar ... I think ... mostly I was concerned with the mosquitos...

Joe

Actually, if any of you lot of pillocks haven't read Papa Khann's description of the evening, sod on off back to the previous Thread and give it a look. The man could be a journalist. He captured the very essence and heart of the evening.

And now, I'm a bit tired from contemplating how hideous the entire experience was. Oh, except for the incredible amount of abuse we heaped on several of you (anyone giving it some thought can come up with a short list of those who were most severely and thoroughly abused and belittled).

That bit was quite jolly, and there are any number of waitresses, attractive bar-goers, bartenders, and people who spend the evenings boating about Lake Minnetonka who will laugh until they can't hold their water if they ever meet you.

Yes, we used your real names as well as your screennames. How do we know them? Simple. BFC graciously provides us with the names and addresses of everyone who comes in here.

That one made some of you lot nervous, now didn't it?

Oh, and Slapdragon. I hate and despise you. I'm going to get a gun (Dalem and Lars have thousands of the damn things, seemingly, and Lars's cousins are probably involved in selling them internationally), and I'm going to come to your house and shoot you right through the lungs. Then I'm going to sit down, and crack a couple of beers and offer you one while I drink the other and watch you expire from your sucking chest wound.

Or, at least I would if I didn't actually know that only by driving a stake through your heart, cutting off your head, burning your body, and then scattering the ashes at a crossroads is the only way to actually kill you and put an end to your endless fund of insane knowledge and annoying opinions.

So, after shooting you through the lungs, I will also do all the above to you as well.

I don't ever want you, Slapdragon, to think that other nations hate you worse than we do, and I'm certainly not letting a bunch of unevenly evolved marsupials take you out when that privilege should be one that your fellow Americans have first right to.

[mcgivney]

You know, I've been around for a loooong time, and I never did get around to asking...

What the hell is the Peng Challenge thread?

[Noba]

Posted by my Liege, Slapdragon in the previous post...

Noba my esteemed comrad, what is wrong with your collective psych down there. Is the constant diet of sheep? Is it the raging headache acquired from always hanging upside down? Is it the fact that you are surrounded by marsupials and have pouch envy? Please help me understand this!!

Well, look at whats rolled up. The part-time-liege. Sire, if you would be so kind as to check out my sig; you will note my status. Between yourself and the insufferable Joe (NOT BOLDED cos he can't organise a good drowning by stepping off the boat) there is the little matter of "knighthood".

Now to recap for you. You set me the task of beating AJ in "The Joust". This was handily accomplished. (Check with the stenographers...down lads !) Photos were published in a thread, many moons ago that prove this. (Do a search).

So. Good old Joe puts up a call for my elevation (or otherwise) to Kanniggithood, and promptly gets no reply. Sigh, it's hard to get good Lieges' nowadays.

So, Sire. How do you say?

As for the answer to your question. I forgot.

Noba.

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by mcgivney:

You know, I've been around for a loooong time, and I never did get around to asking...

What the hell is the Peng Challenge thread?

The last, best hope of Mankind for a more humourous tomorrow...

[Noba]

Posted by GOGS

Ah kin visualize tha corpulent Burswood dunny washer noo, hunched o'er tha confusin' keyburrd, peckin' awah at tha pesky keys, sniggerin' tae hais shtyupid sailf as hae ekes oot a laboured taunt. Wha dinye wheel ye flyblown carcass oot ontae tha Kwinana Freeway an' defile tha front' o' sum Freeo bound speedin' combi? Ye poot sniffin' Sand Groper.

Ha ! Ya corpulant pustule on a pimple. True West Australians , and others who have visited our fair city, know that the Kwinana Freeway does not go to Freeo. And whoever saw a "speeding kombi ?" ...unless of course it was downhill with a tail wind. Pillock.

Get you facts straight, ye cock-eyed mangey spaniel lover.

Noba.

[ August 27, 2002, 12:59 AM: Message edited by: Noba ]

[Noba]

I've been around for a loooong time,

Too long. The answer is SOD OFF. Now do it.

Noba.

[BFCElvis]

Wankers.

[mcgivney]

Originally posted by Noba:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />I've been around for a loooong time,

Too long. The answer is SOD OFF. Now do it.

Noba.</font>

[Papa Khann]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Oh well, as I have zero time (hotel has this silly one hour online rule)

Joe, have you been using up your hour surfing porn again? Oh, excuse me, I meant "grog porn".

and since I actually have to work after work I'll only say that Papa Khann is a complete and utter liar ... I think ... mostly I was concerned with the mosquitos. I claimed three downed but dalem swears the last one was still flying although he was trailing smoke from one wing.

Joe

Be that as it may, Joe, how we coming on the Knighthood thing? Tis time, Joe, to hold up your end of our bargain. To date, I have:

1) Posted the exploits of the Minnie-Snoda Poolers Plus Shaw, as you asked.

2) Omitted the description and photos of you oggling up the 60 year old women at the bar, hooting and bleating your mating call at them and accusing them of being (shudder) "hot young thangs", as you asked.

3) Placed $500 in used twenty dollar bills in your fanny pack, er, excuse me... I know how that term upsets you... in your "european carryall", as you asked.

4) Whupped R_Late twice, BooR_adley once, dalem (aka Slag Heap) once, Nobutt once, and Pantless Leader once (even though Pantless and the silly AI still maintain it was a draw). I played some games of CM too... And oh yeah, Joe, I let you win... er, I mean I was bested on the field of CM by you twice, My Liege. That adds up to at least 5 don't it?

So now, Joe, with all the reasons (and bribes) in place, don't you think it's time you proposed me for Knighthood? In case you're wavering (I've already handed over the money? What the bleedin' 'ell was I thinking? Blast that Lard, I knew I saw him slip something into my drink!), I'll attempt to persuade you further.

Joe, just look at the bright side of my becoming a Knight....

First, you get to begin the arduous task of once again distancing yourself from me. And lets not forget, Joe, the quicker you begin, the sooner the task is completed. Why, just imagine the benefits of NOT having me as your Squire, Joe, next time I present some incredibly stupid and pointless post that creates a flurry of outrage amongst the few remaining decent citizens of cyberspace. And lets face it, Joe, as well as I can remember, I haven't pulled any especially egregious gaffs for at least two days now. Much as I hate to admit it, I'm due.

Also, Joe, when you've finished with the speech, and the ceremony, and the banquet, and the gala festivities that I'm sure will follow the banquet, and the after hours party at Lard's cousin's place, and you're finally able to tell those few gullible idjits not yet drunk enough to ignore you "I'm a miracle worker. I've done the impossible. I've prepared Papa Freaking Khann for Knighthood", just think of the free time you're going to have on those freshly washed hands of yours.

No more following me around vainly trying to tidy up the shambles I've made of the public rooms at The Shavian House. No more trying to catch me in the act of scrawling "Mr. Shaw is not in today, but he can be reached at Wal-Mart" in big white letters on the bloody front gate. No more listening to Lard and Harv and the others complain that someone has been sneaking around and consuming all their private stock again.

Face it, Joe, even a poor unfortunate soul like you is going to see quite a bit of improvement in your life once you're rid of me.

And Joe, should you begin to entertain the thought of casting me back into the Pool sans your recommendation that I be Knighted, just remember that you are the Just-A-Car (and I still have the photos). Eventually, Joe, you'd have to deal with me again. Yes, like a tumor, Joe, you can cut me out, but can you ever be sure you've cut away enough?

In the end, Joe, I say a deal is a deal. (And personally I doubt anyone here wants to listen to you whining about how inebriated you were when the deal was struck.)

What say you now, Joe?

Papa

[ August 27, 2002, 01:32 AM: Message edited by: Papa Khann ]

[OGSF]

Originally posted by Noba:

Posted by GOGS

At does af'n ye turrn off afore ye git tae tha stinkin' refinery, ya sand wedgie.

Wha din'ye inflate an inner tube an' paddle oot tae Rottnest, find a feckin' quokka an' practice kissin' at's spotty arse while sum yobbo play's quokka soccer wi' at? Ye knuckle dragger.

[dalem]

Originally posted by mcgivney:

You know, I've been around for a loooong time, and I never did get around to asking...

What the hell is the Peng Challenge thread?

Exactly!

[mcgivney]

Oh god, it's all coming back to me now...

[Papa Khann]

Originally posted by mcgivney:

I don't have to take that kinda crap from an Aussie.

Well I must say this McKidneys showed a glimmer of hope during his short stay here. An almost hopelessly dim glimmer, but a glimmer nonetheless.

McKidneys, you are indeed correct (a first for you, I'm sure). You don't have to take that kinda crap from an Aussie. Currently we're beset with Aussies here and the exterminators haven't been able to do a thing about them.

You do, however, have to take it from me, McKidneys. So kindly <big>SOD OFF</big>. That's a good lad. And mind you don't let Mace jump you from behind on your way out.

Papa

P.S.

dalem, you Slag Heap, why are you posting things here instead of sending me a turn?

[ August 27, 2002, 02:00 AM: Message edited by: Papa Khann ]

[Stuka]

MaMaKahn, you are a palacial expanse of gitness in an ever-expanding universe of gitology.

It is the Australians (bolded out of heart-bursting pride) that keep this place going.

What would it be without us hmmm?

A gathering of balding, overweight 'murkins with the odd smelly euro thrown in for bad measure thats what.

You should show some respect towards your betters young man. It wasn't for nothing that Australia has saved the free worlds arse in WW1 and its sequel, do you not recall crying your eyes out in gratitude when the Australian army liberated Kuwait city and sent Saddam packing?

No, of course you don't.

Because you are a nancy-boy of biblical proportions whose voyage of 'self discovery' only lead to that ugly 'incident' in the park.

In short, pipe down you mook.

You know not of what you dribble.

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by mcgivney:

I don't have to take that kinda crap from an Aussie.

Yes you do. While Ozzies are just about completely useless, that still puts them one step up the food chain from you. Now, SOD OFF!

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Yuck ... I've NEVER seen such a sloppy, half arsed rendition of the sacred rules in my life and I've seen MBTs that Panzer Leader tried to start.

Now Joe, Leeo's rules suck, but nothing sucks worse than a Panzer Leader thread

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by wamphyri:

{runs for cover}

Don't stop until your lungs burst

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by Noba:

So. Good old Joe puts up a call for my elevation (or otherwise) to Kanniggithood, and promptly gets no reply.

Incorrect you ungrateful swine.