Nidan1 Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 Originally posted by lenakonrad: HUG ME konrad Faithful Squire To SIR AUSSIEJEFF I will with a spare tire necktie, if you don't send a turn, you twit! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 Originally posted by Lars: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Daytona is for girls who like to chew Skoal on the beach and dribble tobacco into their bikinis. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 Ahhhh, Daytona. A lovely city whose motto is: Mueva hacia atrás lejos del vehÃculo y asuma la posición. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 Sir Lars Okay you win: AOL is for losers AOL is for losers AOL is for losers AOL is for losers AOL is for losers 56k is for chumps 56k is for chumps 56k is for chumps 56k is for chumps 56k is for chumps. Now, how the heck do you rename the extension. I right click on the file, hit rename, but the stupid extension doesn't come up. I tried anyway and came up with a file named larsvsboggs002.tot.txt Only by suffering this PUBLIC humiliation will I prove to you my sincerity in wanting to kick your a** in what I am sure is an ambush scenario you have foisted upon me!!!!! You may reply via E-mail or you may relish your triumph here. [ March 17, 2003, 09:35 PM: Message edited by: Jim Boggs ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mike the wino2 Posted March 17, 2003 Share Posted March 17, 2003 Lies, deciet, half-truths, lackwits, it's all here....with one exception: that lowlife mcgivney. Tick-tock, tick-tock, a turn or your head on the block. The choice is yours but as you were losing it matters not. If anyone hears from the toad get him back on track. Killing only one of his 3 T-34s gave me some satisfaction but there is the matter of the other 2 that needs to be resolved. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: Ahhhh, Daytona. A lovely city whose motto is: Mueva hacia atrás lejos del vehÃculo y asuma la posición. None of that dirty talk in here boyo! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Speedy: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo_Radley: Ahhhh, Daytona. A lovely city whose motto is: Mueva hacia atrás lejos del vehÃculo y asuma la posición. None of that dirty talk in here boyo! </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Gaylord Focker: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Speedy: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo_Radley: Ahhhh, Daytona. A lovely city whose motto is: Mueva hacia atrás lejos del vehÃculo y asuma la posición. None of that dirty talk in here boyo! </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Do they have, do you suppose, polar bears that AREN'T white in Poland? Joe I'll have no truck with this sort of inquiry after the nature of divinity. One accepts one's personal saviour as a seal and walrus devouring shaggy predator, or one does not. And questions like this raise issues that blur the very lines between belief, faith, and salvation. Joe, I hadn't looked for this sort of dismissive and jocular bigotry from you. Shall I once again sing "The Hymn of the Immaculate Digestion"? Now some men pray to gods and some sacrifice to devils Some folk go to church And some to satanic revels Some place faith only in science While others worship money But my god’s greatest of all, although you might find him funny Refrain: There’s a Power watching over me And I now proclaim his name He’s a great, white polar bear named Fred He loves me and he guides me Comforts me and chides me And he’s promised that he’ll eat me when I’m dead Well I used to walk alone, And I often walked in darkness Through a spiritual landscape Filled with ugliness and starkness But now aurora borealis Flames all around my head ‘Cause a great white bear has promised, that he’ll eat me when I’m dead You can talk about your heavens You can talk about your hells You can ponder and debate my friend About where your soul will dwell But when I’m dead and gone And Fred’s eaten that last bit I will spend eternity, as a pile of frozen **** Refrain: There’s a Power watching over me And I’ll declare his name He’s a great, white polar bear named Fred He loves me and he guides me Comforts me and chides me And he’s promised that he’ll eat me when I’m dead Now Fred performs no miracles Except that of digestion To punish sinners, raise up saints That’s just out of the question No temples have been raised to him Except the mound there’ll be When he’s finally digested, and excreted me Don’t fill me with embalming fluid Let’s skip that old cremation I will return all that I was and am And be at one with all creation So when I’m dead and gone And shuffled off this mortal coil Passing through great Fred’s intestines, will be my final toil Refrain: There’s a Power watching over me And I even know his name He’s a great, white polar bear named Fred He loves me and he guides me Comforts me and chides me And he’s promised that he’ll eat me when I’m dead If you believe in my polar bear Then he’ll believe in you And when you’re dead and gone my friend Great Fred will eat you too And we will pass together Through the bowels of another species And be immortalized forever, as polar bear feces 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: If you believe in my polar bear Then he’ll believe in you And when you’re dead and gone my friend Great Fred will eat you too And we will pass together Through the bowels of another species And be immortalized forever, as polar bear feces Not that there's anything wrong with that.... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 How to put this, in a way that won't demean me, and cast my soul into some sort of 'slough of despond' for eternity...which would serve it right, given what I'm about to say: Boggs, you lackwitted, annoying piece of ****e: You're in. I don't like you, have no use for you, and, having lived in Florida for the longest 12 months of my life, I'm pretty sure I've met you, and regret not having paid more attention and paying the money to have you forever removed from America's long descent into idiocy. But at least you stand up on your hind legs and bark like a very stupid, unpleasant, soon-to-be-neutered-if-there-is-a-god small, yappy, 'isn't it great that I can poop on the beach' dog. I hate you, and dismiss you. Sort out your status with the Justicar. He can't be crueler to you than Nature has already proven to be. Or rather, Nature is never as cruel as She's been to you for more than a generation. She throws up monsters, fools, and halfwits on a regular basis, on Her road to developing humanity, and teaching the rest of us both sorrow, and pity, for such as you. [ March 18, 2003, 04:01 AM: Message edited by: Seanachai ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: Crystal clear thoughts, in a world of confusion lead me on a path of black stone my breath comes in halting spasms for what must I atone? .... Why can't I have the things I want? it is a really simple request to have some peace of mind and finally get some rest the gargoyles roost in my head tearing and ripping at the fibersThat was... Awful, and no way of mistaking it, or trying to pretend otherwise. But at least you made the effort...shudder...I'll never forget that...although someday I'll...no, I won't forgive you, either, but I'll never foget that. But Nidan, when the turkey buzzards fold wings, and settle to feed on your carcass (doubtless left in some desolate place by your wife, or an ex-wife, who simply couldn't stand your continued existence any longer), know that I will raise a glass, and toast your memory, and say: Jesus Christ on a Crutch, Attempting To Do a Cheer for the Green Bay Packers, but he was an awful, wayward man. You can't ask for a better epitaph than that, lad. Not unless you work very, very hard at your poetry. Hell, man, I've written better poetry than that, written it onto the backing of an empty six-pak, rolled it into a cylinder, inserted it into an empty bottle of Jameson's, and thrown it into the Minnesota River (just below Hidden Falls). Still, I think your heart's in the right place. Pity. A little more effort, and we could rip it out and send it up as your final tribute to 'I'm an Idiot, But I Long To See the Peng Challenge Thread Drag Me Into An Awakening of Wonder'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by AUSSIEJEFF: Not that there's anything wrong with that.... Silence, Toad! And pray that Great Fred forgives you for being Australian, and, so, removed from being in the proper Hemisphere for being One with Him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: And pray that Great Fred forgives you for being Australian, and, so, removed from being in the proper Hemisphere for being One with Him. I think most of us Aussies will pass on being one with great Fred. Or perhaps it's more correct to say 'not pass'? Mace 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Noba: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />What? Do you mean who are "Shecky Greene" and "Shemp Howard"? Geez, from a guy who's country has given the world "Ginger Meggs" I figured they would be two of your patron saints. Listen here you reject. Just cough up the answer and stop parading your international cartoon education. And my Tigers WANT to stay on the side of the map. They feel safer there...... Noba. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: Still, I think your heart's in the right place. Pity. A little more effort, and we could rip it out and send it up as your final tribute to 'I'm an Idiot, But I Long To See the Peng Challenge Thread Drag Me Into An Awakening of Wonder'. How perceptive of you, oh wonderous Seanachai . You have discovered the true motive for my arrival here. I long to be a poet, to have the words I pen cause the human heart to soar to the heavens in one verse and sink to the depths in the next. I wish to set words in motion in the vein of Joyce Kilmer, or Shelley, perheps even Tennyson or Kipling. It is truly a dream of mine, man's greatest accomplishment is to create joy by the joining the words of his respective tongue. To find such wonder amid the obvious lack of same in this awful place, is truly the surprise of surprises. To translate the love of tactical game playing into the spinning of yarns and verse is the combined fulfillment I have sought. I shall put down the sword!, the pen shall be my mighty weapon, I will succor my personal torment by creating a torrent of creative verse, perhaps even someday reaching the lofty heights that you so surely (I know don't call you Shirley) inhabit. I have seen the light, I know. The MBT is the sound of one hand clapping, the crash of a tree falling in the forest, the eternal KI which flows through all of us...shudder...yes even you Boo , the life force which binds all existence. By Jove, I think I've got it. Oh and Seanachai becaause I have reached this new state of enlightenment, and I think I owe a miniscule amount of credit to thee, and it deeply pains me to realize that I have sunk this low as to actually have to admit that. I think the only way to achieve a cathartic release for myself is to have the unique pleasure of applying a large BOOT to your arse on the field of battle, I will send a setup if you wish, a real man will accept the challenge, you remember what a real man is, don't you? I expect you were one at one time in your life? [ March 18, 2003, 08:30 AM: Message edited by: Nidan1 ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Noba: But your obvious likening for all things great, and AUSTRALIAN, is paraded for all to see. Not only do you read Ginger Meggs, but I reckon you think Hooper is a dead-set-ringer for your grotty self. Lets see......... Noba. Read Ginger Meggs once...it was too painful to continue. It had all the wit and panache of The Family Circus. Hooper...wasn't that a Burt Reynold's film? Or are you referring to Tobe Hooper, the director of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (a film that actually shows off the best that Texas has to offer)? Or is your reference basketball related? It's too bad that English is just your second language, because I feel we could communicate so much better. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: How to put this, in a way that won't demean me, and cast my soul into some sort of 'slough of despond' for eternity...which would serve it right, given what I'm about to say: Boggs, you lackwitted, annoying piece of ****e: You're in. I don't like you, have no use for you, and, having lived in Florida for the longest 12 months of my life, I'm pretty sure I've met you, and regret not having paid more attention and paying the money to have you forever removed from America's long descent into idiocy. But at least you stand up on your hind legs and bark like a very stupid, unpleasant, soon-to-be-neutered-if-there-is-a-god small, yappy, 'isn't it great that I can poop on the beach' dog. I hate you, and dismiss you. Sort out your status with the Justicar. He can't be crueler to you than Nature has already proven to be. Or rather, Nature is never as cruel as She's been to you for more than a generation. She throws up monsters, fools, and halfwits on a regular basis, on Her road to developing humanity, and teaching the rest of us both sorrow, and pity, for such as you. Damn it all Seanachai, it's too bloody early here to have to deal with paperwork, let alone paperwork on that worthless neer-do-well Gym Bags ... hmmmm, are you sure then? It's not often you find a name that lends itself to mutilation as well as this one does ... right, right, on with it I suppose. Still, one must do one's duty. I presume from the above that it's your intention to make him a Serf of the CessPool and, thereby, staking your claim to him as a future Squire should you so choose. Well fine but he'd best not be expecting any sort of ceremony for I'm in no mood for it today. Jim Boggs (spelt but not bolded) ... you're a Serf, grab a bucket lad, the Knights will be up shortly and a full bladder is an uncomfortable thing. Mind you he's nearly of an age with ME so that's a good thing ... always nice to find someone else who knows who the 1910 Fruitgum Company was. Joe [ March 18, 2003, 09:11 AM: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vadr Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 The Stables are this way Boggs, you won't be seeing the beach for a bit. Make sure you sweep well, the farrier will be here to shoe the steeds on the morrow (except for Hortlund's Shetland pony of course, it only needs a trim). 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Jim Boggs: Sir Lars Okay you win: AOL is for losers 56k is for chumps Now, how the heck do you rename the extension. I right click on the file, hit rename, but the stupid extension doesn't come up. I tried anyway and came up with a file named larsvsboggs002.tot.txt Only by suffering this PUBLIC humiliation will I prove to you my sincerity in wanting to kick your a** in what I am sure is an ambush scenario you have foisted upon me!!!!!AOL, everybody's first ISP...***sigh***... Change it from "larsvsboggs002.tot.txt" to "larsvsboggs002.tot". Or "larsvsboggs002.BIS" {Boggs Is Senile}. Or even " larsvsboggs002.IBS" {Incompetent Boggs Strikes}. The key is to delete the .TXT extension and replace it with something else before attaching the file. You were so close. You must have missed the joys of DOS not to know this. Or do as I suggested and download WinZip, then zip the file, attach it, and send it to me. Will save you time on a 56K modem as the file will be about half the size afterwards. This is the preferred option. Or get a real ISP. SSN Hint Of The Day: Pry. Now sod off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: ... always nice to find someone else who knows who the 1910 Fruitgum Company was. Joe "Yummy, yummy, yummy, I've got love in my tummmy and I feel like loving you...." You asked for that, didn't you ... [ March 18, 2003, 09:47 AM: Message edited by: AUSSIEJEFF ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 HEAR YE, HEAR YE!!! It being near the bewitching hour in Perth, and following in the vein of my previous Yummy post I hereby proclaim that always Faithful Squire Konrad hath Faithfuly completed all quests, assignments, deeds, tasks, trials, tests and other odds and sods as is requisite for conideration of Kanniggggetthood. Ergo, and prima facie, he has indulged in more than 5 battles with Pooligans and annihilated most, if not me {of course, he is still lerning from the Grand Master of Military Tactics, Group South - this will take many years}. He has successfully confused and befuddles most dimwits frequenting this Holey Hole. He has annoyed the HELL out of Berli, Seanachai, Peng and most importantly Joe. These are prime requisites. He has regaled us with quaint lilting prose. He hates everyone with gusto. A noble trait indeed! Why, even the Pretender <SMALL>mEEK!s<BIG> was seen to SOD OFF at the same time my Faithful Squire arrived on the scene. Not that there was anything wrong with THAT! Thus, and withall, in the traditions of the 'Pool I hereby pronounce you Kannigett, *pending formal approval of the Olde Ones. *DUB* Ooops! Sorry for the little cut! Here, use my hankie... ARISE, SIR LENAKONRAD, Kanigget* of the Roight Regal and Rancid Cesspool!! You are free* to sally forth and harrass SSN's, Fluffies and ne'er do wells within the boundaries of 'Pool etiquette. Then, one day in a moment of insanity, you may even take some poor sod unto Squire yourself*, thus the cycle continues .... Let us all CELEBRATE this happy event*. Hola!! Here, chug-a-lug this jug of XXXX mate! *hic* Sir Aussiejeff 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 The role of a serf in this thread without end unCESSing devotion, maintaining a grin Don't be rejoicing, don't expect a parade Mop bucket and mop are the tools of your trade The stench that pervades must always be clean No cursing or swearing, don't ever be mean The 'old ones' are watching, judging your ways Do it for laughs, don't ask what it pays So now that you've got your foot in the toilet Be respectful of cabbage, don't try to boil it Always work hard and keep your tools clean To await the return of Berli and Peng Jim Boggs Serf [ March 18, 2003, 10:55 AM: Message edited by: Jim Boggs ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Two things: Gym Bags (really, really outstanding Joe) and the Justicar are of an age together? Would that be Iron or Stone? Also, does the thought of Aussie Jeff reproducing make anyone else want to shower repeatedly? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 18, 2003 Share Posted March 18, 2003 Oh uh ... well ... uh ... OH Not so fast there AussieJeff {Joe looks around frantically for a loophole, ANY loophole} ... uh, OH right, not so fast there AussieJeff, exactly WHAT were the requirements for Knighthood? I mean normally it's up the Knight to proclaim the requirements, but in YOUR case it would likely be something akin to "Say Lenakonrad ... seen my second best spurs anywhere?". In YOUR case, of course, that would be equivilant to sending someone on a search for the Holy Grail. Actually in HIS case it would probably be the same. SO ... what EXACTLY was the task you set for him ... chapter and verse, lad, full details and all that. Can't have slipshod paperwork you know. Whew! That was close ... with luck he'll forget all about this Knighthood for lenakonrad while he's trying to figure out how to "slipshod" something. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.