ferdinand Posted April 20, 2001 Share Posted April 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by The_Capt: for that I apologize. [/QB]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> No need to... I got the joke, was just wondering where in the evolutionary ladder I was sitting. Keep on sending them, Capt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Screamineagle Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 What a riot. I had my wife read it because she HATES this game. Even she cracked a smile. Sometimes a little humor goes a long way. At least she feel better about the fact that my addiction is shared by other folks on this forum. Keep them coming. I look forward to your perspective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-E Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 1. Where do we get sock puppets? 2. What is the effective range of a sock puppet? 3. Does a sock puppet in sneak mode, get the hull down benefit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deanco Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 Man, I haven't laughed that hard in a good long time. Brilliant. I'm actually afraid to read it again, I'm afraid I might split a gut. Many thanks for starting my day off with a hearty laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schugger Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 How could I have missed that thread? I still have stomach aches from laughing so hard Capt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkEzra Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 An Excellent post. I had A great laugh reading. Of course, as a "Historian" I'm doing a great deal of research on the subject and am designing a scen on your post. I'm going to need the exact size of your room, what type of dog died and the size of the carpet stain. I'll use a generic Family (one angry wife and 2.5 constantly bickering kids) unless you provide me the exact information with variviable proof. (I'll except wedding photos, baby/school pictures and divorce depositions). I'll also need you to send a screen shot of the puppet so I can include him as an FO. Finall...What the hell does your cross-gendered cat have to do with anything? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Dorosh Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MarkEzra: An Excellent post. I had A great laugh reading. Of course, as a "Historian" I'm doing a great deal of research on the subject and am designing a scen on your post. I'm going to need the exact size of your room, what type of dog died and the size of the carpet stain. I'll use a generic Family (one angry wife and 2.5 constantly bickering kids) unless you provide me the exact information with variviable proof. (I'll except wedding photos, baby/school pictures and divorce depositions). I'll also need you to send a screen shot of the puppet so I can include him as an FO. Finall...What the hell does your cross-gendered cat have to do with anything?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Don't waste your time; Marco already released the Captain Mods; they are currently at CMHQ under "Familial Bliss". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THumpre Posted April 21, 2001 Share Posted April 21, 2001 Oh man that was funny. Great observations Capt. Thank God my cat is house broken, now if only I could do the same with my wife...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted May 3, 2001 Share Posted May 3, 2001 Bumped because it is so true. MrSpkr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BloodyBucket Posted May 4, 2001 Share Posted May 4, 2001 Thank God someone else uses a sock puppet! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Wildman Posted May 8, 2001 Share Posted May 8, 2001 Anything this funny cannot be forgotten. Newbies take heed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted June 9, 2001 Share Posted June 9, 2001 bumped again for fun! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted June 9, 2001 Share Posted June 9, 2001 You are all crazy and THANK GOD WE DO NOT HAVE AN INSIDE DOG - MrSpkr's wife Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warmaker Posted June 9, 2001 Share Posted June 9, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by -E: 1. Where do we get sock puppets? 2. What is the effective range of a sock puppet? 3. Does a sock puppet in sneak mode, get the hull down benefit?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> 1. In obtaining a sock puppet, you must go through the normal logistics channels for your appropriate nation and service. However, as of the WWII timeframe of CMBO, the ease of receiving such a sock puppet varies. Generally it is as follows: -WESTERN ALLIED ARMIES-Garaunteed to receive one. But as winter of '44 approaches fewer and fewer become available. It has been noted by many operators of the so-named-sock puppet have complained of the durability and survivability of such items. -WESTERN ALLIED AIRBORNE DIVISIONS-Highly likely to receive issue of the sock puppet but frequency tended to dwindle also when winter of '44 approaches. To tailor to the elite nature of the Airborne, the sock puppet is constructed of a higher quality of a wool/cotton blend, thereby increasing durability. In addition, certain AB divisions receive a "special" sock puppet that has their divisional insignia stitched upon it (much to the dismay of the sock puppet itself). Examples from the U.S. 82nd Airborne have become much sought after collectors items after the war. However, survivability is still in question... -GERMAN HEER/GEBIRGSJAGER-Likely to receive a sock puppet. Attached to it is an inspirational message from Der Fuhrer himself. Historians will come to say in years to come of the many fine versions of the German sock puppet. The zenith of these versions is designated the "SkPppt VG Late." Historians will commend its excellent blend of survivability, mobility, and most of all, lethality. However, as the months progress, the German industrial capability will deteriorate and less and less of these excellent sock puppets become available. In late '44 construction techniques have gotten "cheaper," resulting in much inferior examples with diminished performance from previous versions. -WAFFEN SS/FALLSCHIRMJAGER-Constructed of the finest quality materials with advanced manufacturing techniques, these examples are a notch above the standard Heer versions with increased performance in just about every field possible (namely warmer, for those Russians and that blasted winter of theirs!). It is also of importance that due to such advanced manufacturing, it has become too expensive and resulting in fewer numbers available to the average Waffen SS soldier and Fallschirmjager. Beginning in Jan.'45 "cheaper" versions were made but still stand at the same quality of their Heer counterparts. Also, along with Der Fuherer's message, Waffen SS versions have a bonus pack from Himmler and Fallschirmjagers receive a bonus from Kurt Student himself. -VOLKSSTURM MILITIA-Designed purely for mass production and low costs, these resulting designs are of much inferior quality to the Heer versions. 2.Effective ranges-Again this performance varies from nationality to nationality. -UNITED STATES/FREE FRENCH-Generally does not have good effective ranges compared to German equivalents. One arms' length is the best distance expected from most American versions. Some rare, late war variants can reach up to 1-1/2 arm's length. -UNITED KINGDOM/CANADA/POLAND-For most part suffers in performance like their American counterparts. However, certain sock puppet variants such as the "Firepuppet Mk.Vb" possess an increase in lethality and range. Ranges for these "upsocked" variants equal German versions whose ranges and accuracy are reknowned: Up to TWO WHOLE ARMLENGTHS away! Tommies everywhere rejoiced upon receiving these "upsocked" puppets. -GERMAN-The effective ranges from mid-late war German sock puppets are well known and documented. The majority can reach up to two armlengths away, an excellent capability, while still retaining alot of lethality. In addition, due to some designers' "Uberpuppet" mentality, there are versions that will reach up to THREE ARMLENGTHS away. An outstanding feat for any WWII weapon system. 3.The question was,"Does a sock puppet in sneak mode, get the hull down benefit?"... The answer in the traditional armored vehicle sense is NO. The sock puppet is an infantry carried, hand held weapon. However, it does draw upon the benefit of defensive fortifications such as bunkers, foxholes, buildings, and forested areas. ....yeah, yeah, I was bored and my girl was sick on a Friday night. Anyhow, this was the result... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foobar Posted June 9, 2001 Share Posted June 9, 2001 Hey capt, your little vignettes are a great service to our community at large. We are so isolated. We are mocked by those around us who dont understand what armor spalling is. We are chastised for not doing dishes. Without the solidarity which is shown in this thread, we are all certainly doomed to a fate much worse than if CM didnt exist. But what if the game exists, but we dont get to play! Oh sure, i bought the damn thing to show my support, but when will I play w/o getting into trouble with the missus? I dont know about you guys, but when CM2 comes out, I plan on logging 18 hours of play on the 1st DAY, not in the first 2 months. Capt, where can i pick up back issues of the bi-monthly lurker? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Wildman Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 ...and the number shall be three. It shall be after two and before four. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ales Dvorak Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 Time warp Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darwin Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 I must contest as I have been horribly misqouted... ps hey gustav, yer back. I think our first game isn't recuperable... send a file any file at will Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 I saw PIPPU in LA with Nicole Kidman last week. I think he's looking for a movie deal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Capt Posted August 3, 2001 Author Share Posted August 3, 2001 Wow, Now here is a blast from the past. Sorry there FOOBAR I was on vacation when you posted your question. I don't keep copies of my ramblings so I guess you will have to sacrifice about 20 mins of your life to the unholy alter of the battlefront Search Engine. I would suggest looking for "Lurker" in the title as all of them have it. I think I am up to 5 or 6 now. And when the muse takes me (or Jim Bean as the case may be) I'll put out another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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