One Peng to Pool Them All, And In the Challenge Malign Them

[Lars]

I particularly enjoyed Woody Allen singing karoke.

And Hanns, you forgot to mention that the goat was pregnant.

No wonder Mace wants to come to the U.S. to fulfill his paternal duties.

[jshandorf]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Lars:

I particularly enjoyed Woody Allen singing karoke.

<hr></blockquote>

For all that is holy and sacred, that man was F'ing histerical and what made it even better was that he had no idea just how damn funny he was. I about split my gut just lookin' at him.

Jeff

[imported_Wildman]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by jshandorf:

[QBI will never forget the man with the pink feather and the leather chaps. May he be beatin' into a bloody pulp in an alley somewhere.

[ 10-25-2001: Message edited by: jshandorf ][/QB]<hr></blockquote>

Yes, Slappy needs beaten whenever he dares don that ridiculous getup.

[Berlichtingen]

Ha! Again no hangover! Unfortunately, I did have the drive from hell (in a Metro fighting gale force cross winds for 8 hours). More later... too flippin' tired right now

[Turkish]

I accept this clown's challenge. Is it necessary for him to be that chatty? Yak yak yak, put a sock in it junior, and prepare to die.

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Turkeyish:

I accept this clown's challenge. Is it necessary for him to be that chatty? Yak yak yak, put a sock in it junior, and prepare to die.<hr></blockquote> You know lads, for someone who has READ THE RULES, he's doing a remarkably poor job. Apparently he missed the part about "For it is by your words, see you, that you will be judged." This is the thread for taunting, for challenging, for sounding off like a man, so what does Turkeyish reply ... "Yak yak yak". I tell you gang, his AARs best improve or he'll never make it to Serf.

Joe

[Slapdragon]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Wildman:

Yes, Slappy needs beaten whenever he dares don that ridiculous getup.<hr></blockquote>

Come on, it is a very liberal police force I serve on.

[Mark IV]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by PeterNZer:

I'm in Irvine, CA right now.<hr></blockquote>

G) I am south of you, you poor flightless bird. Get a map and a charge card.

7) Check your e-mail. There are instructions there.

c) If all else fails, head toward Mexico. Pass the dead Nixon and the live nuke plant. Pass Camp Pendleton, and yell "cheese-eating surrender monkeys, Taliban rules" as you drive through (best fling some white powder out the window for emphasis). I'll be waiting at the base hospital for you. Honest, I will.

[Slapdragon]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

You know lads, for someone who has READ THE RULES, he's doing a remarkably poor job. Apparently he missed the part about "For it is by your words, see you, that you will be judged." This is the thread for taunting, for challenging, for sounding off like a man, so what does Turkeyish reply ... "Yak yak yak". I tell you gang, his AARs best improve or he'll never make it to Serf.

Joe<hr></blockquote>

Yep, I am sitting around, reading more profane bible passages, having a nice chat with my anthropologist friends, and getting over a cold, or perhap Hep B, reading some of the forum in search of more idiots, when I start reading this drivel. Not Shaw, who indeed is an idiot of monumental proportions, but no more than anyone else on the the MBT, but this other idiot Turkish Bath Boy. Here comes Hann, proving he has something akin to testicles dangling from his otherwise worthless torso (well, likely his danglies are worthless also, but not being a sheep I am in no position to tell), and bubbleboy (and I mean that in the non politically correct way) cannot see that verbosity is a form of the very staff of godliness. Indeed I am sure Peng{/b] would have been excommunicated long ago if not for the gift of gab, and certianly others on this forum justify their existence by how many bytes of server space there ramblings take up.

So moron, lets have no more poking fun at long and rambling challenges. They are, as my anthropologist friend tells me before she starts to ramble about veganism and I am forced to bitch slap her, a way in which a virtual culture nits itself together into a socially constructed community of peers.

In otherword, accept the challenge dufus or sod off.

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Here comes Hann, proving he has something akin to testicles dangling from his otherwise worthless torso (well, likely his danglies are worthless also, but not being a sheep I am in no position to tell)<hr></blockquote> Well Slapdragon, since your Knight is off boozing and carousing (not that THAT'S particularly unusual, but the fact that he's doing it with the other OLDE ONES IS ... and is also fairly disturbing), I'll take just a moment to point out that it doesn't do to make much of SSNs. Indeed, even damning with faint praise is too much.

Now granted, when compared to Turkeyish our lad Hamms is a veritable Voltaire, but an SSN is still an SSN. There's also the matter of that club he pimps for ... no, I'm not complaining about that as an avocation, I mean Hell we've got Lawyer here, how much worse could it be. No I'm complaining because he hasn't seen fit to share photos of this Mistress Jean or whatever with us. Frankly I'm beginning to think that he's not what he claims ... wouldn't surprise me at all to discover that he's another ... attorney.

[ 10-26-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]</p>

[MrPeng]

Home

The meeting of the Olde Ones has come to an end. I am relatively certain that our opinions of all and sundry on the board in general and the MBT in particular were somewhat in alignment. One that stands out is that we heartily agreed that the generic CMPlayer with his generic name, generic posting habits and patheticness on all fronts is completely useless and should be vigorously prosocuted by the Justicar and vigorously ignored by everyone else.

And speaking of PShaw we all agreed that while he is one of the most productive in the number of posts, he certainly seems to post a lot. We also tended to agree that PShaw has indeed posted many times to the MBT. We also thought that Posting to the thread is something that The Drain Commissioner can be counted upon to do on a frequent basis.

And while in real life Shaggy is not nearly as irritating as he is on the board, he takes the game far too seriously, and needs a few years under his belt to simmah dahn nah.

Lars can certainly put back the cold ones. although I lost count somewhere along the way, what with Hanns's two fisted pitcher buying at a breakneck pace. We agreed that he {Lars} Looked a little too much like Gary Shandling to be comfortable about. We also agreed that it was nice that someone the size of Hanns seemed to think buying us beer was a good idea instead of pounding us into the pavement. Hanns is a big fellah alright. Quite large. And GENEROUS, and kind, courteous, thrifty...hey! WAIT A MINUTE! WHO LET HIM IN THE POOL?! {I can say that now because I am out of arm's reach.}

Anyway, I had a really swell time, well except for my liver and kidneys. They are not very happy now. The only thing I can tell them is at least I didn't get as drunk as ol' Pink Feather in Chaps.

Oh and Elvis you wanker Not ONE barf outa me. I think since it happens only when I am with you that it must be your fault. Swine.

Lastly, Seanachai was not at all what I expected him to be. I'm not sure what I expected, but it wasn't what he really is. Oh sure, I expected someone who never stops talking, and with a wide and varied store of knowledge of things about which I care very little, and a welcoming "Hail Fellow, Well Met!" sort of a guy hmmmm come to think of it he was EXACTLY what I expected. The Pillock.

And lastly more again, the Evil One who was the ultimate champion of the MPLS tournament (not that we care about winning and losing) is in fact EVIL. No doubt about it. We all saw him and he is in fact Lucifer. So if you should decide to screw around with him do so at your own peril.

I am tired from too much frisking in airports and too much waiting around in airport bars and too much bumping through horrible winds that make big effing airplanes bounce around like toy boats in a tub; bouncing in a way that makes you dig your fingers into the thigh of a complete stranger sitting next to you swerving and dipping and lurching and "we're going to die!" and then realizing you have to do it all over again when you get to effing Pittsburgh and have to catch a connecting flight. Yes. I am that kind of tired. Prolly why the quality of this post is such crap. Or its just me. Again.

Feh

Peng.

[Joe Shaw]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>The meeting of the Olde Ones has come to an end. I am relatively certain that our opinions of all and sundry on the board in general and the MBT in particular were somewhat in alignment. One that stands out is that we heartily agreed that the generic CMPlayer with his generic name, generic posting habits and patheticness on all fronts is completely useless and should be vigorously prosocuted by the Justicar and vigorously ignored by everyone else.<hr></blockquote> You know, the problem with Olde Ones is that they are ... well ... OLD! And as we all know, OLD people forget things. I was among the first to condemn young CM Player for his name and indeed his SSNess, but Sir Marlow took him to squire, a move I ALSO decried, AND THE OLDE ONES DID NOTHING! It would seem that only the Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread is vigilant and honors the traditions of the CessPool as they deserve.

Speaking of young CM Player, he is winning the game created by Berli that we are playing. For those who might find it interesting, I think it's called "Fun With The Paratroopers OR How Capt. Winters and Easy Company Stomped the Living Crap Out of Some East Front Rejects and Their Tin Can Tanks in the Freaking Dark On Account of How The American Paratroopers ARE GOD and Berli is Going to Make DAMN Sure of it by Padlocking the Germans Where They COULDN'T win if They had Freaking TACTICAL NUKES!" ... I could be wrong on the title.

Joe

[Berlichtingen]

I would like to address the various and vicious tales that Elvis has regaled us all about Peng. As you all know, Elvis has never missed an opportunity to point out what a degenerate and useless wank Peng is. Well, I can now say (based on first hand observation) that aside from the whole thing about vomiting in shoes, every word Elvis has said is the untarnished truth. Enough about Peng.

Next, of course, we come to Seanachai. Everything you imagined about him is also true. No truer self portrait was ever painted with words... read his posts and you have the true essence of Seanachai. There is one thing about him that does not come out in his posts... He is a Gnome. That's right, a lawn decoration animated by some insane impulse of the Gods. I have photographic evidence of this, but that will have to wait until the film is developed. Oh, and did I mention that he LOST TO PENG!!!!

Ah, Shandorf (aka Shaggy)! If you ever suspect that you may find yourself in his presence, arm yourself with tranquilizers. He is rather, shall I say, energetic with his gestures while speaking (we suspect that he is the one that broke Peng's tooth). Peng and Seanachai had to tranquilize him twice on this past Wednesday night to avoid bodily harm.

Lars is Gary Shandling, 'nough said

Hanns I now suspect was really Madmatt in disguise (bloody awful disguise at that... he just put on a toupée) trying to spy on us. If this is not the case, then he is Madmatt's long lost twin bouncer.

Photos to come....

[Berlichtingen]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

I think it's called "Fun With The Paratroopers OR How Capt. Winters and Easy Company Stomped the Living Crap Out of Some East Front Rejects and Their Tin Can Tanks in the Freaking Dark On Account of How The American Paratroopers ARE GOD and Berli is Going to Make DAMN Sure of it by Padlocking the Germans Where They COULDN'T win if They had Freaking TACTICAL NUKES!" ... I could be wrong on the title.<hr></blockquote>

You are, in fact, wrong. The title is... Competent players achieve a draw

This no doubt is why Shaw is having some much trouble with it

[Turkish]

Mr. Shaw, what part of "I ACCEPT THE CLOWN'S CHALLENGE." didn't you understand? Would you like a middle school level reading comprehension book to accompany you when you read the posts of others? I'm sure Haans would fetch you one, being the good lad that he is. You know, Haans is about to fetch me something too, another WIN.

[Mace]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Mark IV:

Pass Camp Pendleton, and yell "cheese-eating surrender monkeys, Taliban rules" as you drive through (best fling some white powder out the window for emphasis). I'll be waiting at the base hospital for you. Honest, I will.<hr></blockquote>

Damn you, Mark IV, I just spritzed beer all over my monitor, the result of reading the above. Please show some consideration next time as beer is a priceless commodity and too precious too waste!

Mace

{edited because I'm not drunk anymore, and noticed a spelling mistake}

[ 10-26-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]</p>

[CMplayer]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Mace:

Damn you, Mark IV, I just spritzed beer all over my monitor, the result of reading the above. <hr></blockquote>

Ditto. MarkIV is just too damn funny. I still can't figure out how a guy from Fresno could get that way. He must be a genetic anomoly.

[ 10-26-2001: Message edited by: CMplayer ]</p>

[Stuka]

Sir Mace, please allow me to lick your monitor.

No, don't thank me, its all part of the service.

[CMplayer]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Jo Xia:

Speaking of young CM Player, he is winning the game created by Berli that we are playing. <hr></blockquote>

And I would just like to add that Berlidid a marvelous job of creating a balanced, thoughtful scenario. It's also full of action, with unforgetable moments like a Hotchkiss crewmember bailing out into the midst of a swarm of mohawked hillbillies who really should have brought the kraut in for questioning but, ya know, in the heat of battle...

[Slapdragon]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Speaking of young CM Player, he is winning the game created by Berli ....

Joe<hr></blockquote>

Which explains why yo yo mah is not returing turns on our game, or is Swedish Telecom again routing his calls through Serbia?

(Edited to confuse Berli)

[ 10-26-2001: Message edited by: Slapdragon ]</p>

[MrSpkr]

Shaw, stop your pathetic whining about TurkishDelightfulBathBoy. He is obviously as dim as a post and completely incapable of understanding the whole concept that 'winning and losing don't matter -- it's the taunting that counts.'

Here you are, Joe, taunting at your usual 5th grade level, and now you are worrying about this dork whose evolutionary ancestors appear to have plateaued around 23 million years ago. Forget about, and go on with life; errr, death, that is, as that is what you seem to be doing quite well in our little battle of Solliès-Ville - Where Fragging Your Own Troops Is A Way Of Life. Perhaps that is why you have neglected to send me a turn recently.

DALEM you worthless pile of pig droppings. Your performance in our last battle had all the grace and style of a pig at a dance recital. I surmise the reason I haven't heard from you recently is that your troops, in a desperate act of self-preservation, made a 9mm perforation of your useless cranium. Well, we both know that type of injury wouldn't keep YOU down for long due to the obviously stunted development of your central nervous system. I mean, you CHOSE to move to Minnefreakinsota of all places. Send me a setup, you geek -- I need more blood to grease the axles of my mechanized columns.

Oh yes, to the lot of you - the MonthFromBerli ends in five short days -- after which my troops will resume their nightly infliction of pixelated death and destruction on your miserable souls.

Now sod off.

[Speedbump]

You know, I thought all of this Mace stuff was just a prank, but then I found the following link:

Sheep Porn

Of course, it does come from New Zealand, does this mean that Mace is actually a Kiwi?

Speedbump

[CMplayer]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Which explains why yo yo mah is not returing turns on our game, or is Swedish Telecom again routing his calls through Serbia?

<hr></blockquote>

You dipstick. I return all of your turns within 12 hours. The problem must be on YOUR end, since none of my other opps have complained.

[Lars]

Actually CMplayer, the problem IS on your end.

After talking to Berli, who is the embodiment of evil, he has assured me that I am well and truly screwed in this matchup.

But then he would, wouldn’t he?

I, however have faith in you CMplayer. Since you have managed to fail at sending e-mails, you will no doubt manage to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

Please resend the last turn.

Pillock.

[Slapdragon]

<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by CMplayer:

You dipstick. I return all of your turns within 12 hours. The problem must be on YOUR end, since none of my other opps have complained.<hr></blockquote>

I guess I will just have to change my e-mail address to berli@girlyboys.com to get a turn from you. I figure that if Dorosh can successfully get turns back to me on time, then it would be easy for you.