Bullethead Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 OK, I admit it, I'm drunk right now. But in this state it has occurred to me that there's one thing the CM community is lacking: initiation rituals for newbies. You know, like telling an Air Warrior dweeb that ESC-p is a cheat code for more power when it's really the command to bail out of your plane So I think the time has come for us to invent some creative lies to tell new CM players, which they can believe to their detriment. All in the name of good fun, of course. When they fall for them, we laugh loudly, pat them on the back, buy them a beer, and welcome them to the CM community To get the ball rolling, here are 2 suggestions. I encourage all you devious bottom-dwellers to add to the list. 1. Alt-U is a cheat code for "ultimate weapons". It basically puts your units in "god mode". 2. (by Ariel aka Argie) There is an off-the-map cheat. You can issue a string of waypoints so that a unit exits the map at Point A, moves along off the map, the re-enters the map at Point B. Great for flanking moves ------------------ -Bullethead In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is strength, in water there is bacteria. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
420 Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 I like #1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GriffinCheng+ Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 LOL! ------------------ "When you find your PBEM opportents too hard to beat, there is always the AI." "Can't get enough Tank?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Dorosh Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 I have a lot of respect for a man who can still remember how to do smilies when he's drunk. Actually, the spelling and grammar are impeccable as well. You even remembered how to italicize. You must be drinking that crappy American beer and only thinking you're drunk.... Tell them that alt-U only works in PBEM mode, while in a ladder competition.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GriffinCheng+ Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Personally, I don't think they would work for people who are used to FPS and console games. Cheats are usually 1. Hit the "~" key for console and then type in a number of strings to enable cheat or; 2. When you see the title screen, press a number of button sequences and when you hear a distinct sound, your cheat is successful, kinda. BH, you are really sober for all the drunk people I have come across. But you are very successful in makiing us have a moment here. BTW, why no people in WB do this to me??? Griffin. ------------------ "When you find your PBEM opportents too hard to beat, there is always the AI." "Can't get enough Tank?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Originally posted by Bullethead: OK, I admit it, I'm drunk right now. But in this state it has occurred to me that there's one thing the CM community is lacking: initiation rituals for newbies. So I think the time has come for us to invent some creative lies to tell new CM players, which they can believe to their detriment. Tell them the best place to get a PBEM is the Peng Challenge Thread, where all you need do is show up and be polite and friendly, and people will give you a game. ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Damn Seanachai!! We haven't even finished unloading the funiture into the new pool yet ! Seriously I don't know what you are thinking sometimes.... More slapdragons and worse.... Oh ! I get it ! yes great Idea. Lorak Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Fox Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Tell them the best place to get a PBEM is the Peng Challenge Thread, where all you need do is show up and be polite and friendly, and people will give you a game.What a brilliantly evil idea. Little will they know that their opponent actually doesn't play CM but just spends all their time composing windy overblown treatises and posting them in that same thread. Just imagine their frustration and confusion as they see post after post appear in that thread and elsewhere while no turns appear. Positively cunning. ------------------ "As has been said, we only listen to bootlickers, and Simon is one of the best out there!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rex_Bellator Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 How about recommending a head-on charge by massed Archer tank destroyers as the most effective attack tactic. Ps. This isn't funny if you heven't used Archer T/Ds before and not particularly funny if you have. ------------------ "We're not here to take it - We're here to give it" General Morshead's response to the popular newspaper headline "Tobruk Can Take It" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M Hofbauer Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 actually, there already _is_ an initiation ritual of sorts re. the CM _board_. It's called DO A SEARCH. However, after posting that newbie or rather "dumbie" (applies to cognitively challenged old-timers as well) initiation I will NOT laugh loudly, pat them on the back, buy them a beer, and welcome them to the CM community Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firefly Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Some of these probably won't work if the newbie is from a wargaming background, but otherwise... 1. The M4 Sherman is a great example of American technology and know-how, 88mm shells will bounce off it's mighty armour like ping-pong balls. 2. If you are faced with a large open space have your infantry run across it, it will make them harder to hit. 3. The small white signs with 'Achtung Minen Panzer' written on them are power-ups, driving your tank over them will increase its armour and ammo. 4. BTS are considering patching the game to include a campaign mode. They have said that the more people that write to the board requesting this, the more likely they are to do it. 5. When writing to the board always agree with Gunny Bunny, this will win you kudos as he is respected by the designers and readership alike. 6. In a QB always buy a lot of rockets, at the critical moment target them immediately in front of your troops; this will clear the undergrowth of hiding enemies and their superior accuracy will leave your own troops unmolested. 7. Mad Matt is a tolerant sort of guy, he doesn't really care what you post on the board. [This message has been edited by Firefly (edited 01-31-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ales Dvorak Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 I like 3#. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mike8g Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 1. Always fire Bazookas and Panzerfaust from inside buildings and try to position another squad behind the firer - they can help him aiming. 2. Use the ROB/1-spellchecker ------------------ Alle Maschinen voraus Große, Ruder hart Backbord. Neuer Kurs wird Zwo-Eins-Null. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pvt. Ryan Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Hit the "GO" button to see a preview of how your orders will be carried out in the actual turn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Triggerhappy Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Originally posted by Firefly: 4. BTS are considering patching the game to include a campaign mode. They have said that the more people that write to the board requesting this, the more likely they are to do it. They did? Wow! Great! BTS, I wanna campaign! Pretty please with sugar on top! ------------------ Rührt euch! CMPFCICM2 - Combat Mission Players for Campaigns in Combat Mission 2 - Join us! ;D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mikey D Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 To flank an opponent, first drive your tanks off the map then have them circle around to the opponent's rear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juardis Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 when in a TCP/IP game, hitting GO within the first 2 sec of each turn for 5 consecutive turns will make all your units invincible for the next 5 turns. Can only be used once per game. ------------------ Jeff Abbott Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Big Time Software Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Pvt. Ryan wrote: Hit the "GO" button to see a preview of how your orders will be carried out in the actual turn. While this will only work once per person (God, it would be horrible if it worked more than that ) I think this is one of the best/worst suggestions thus far. Quite evil. Oh, and just telling people to READ the Peng thread is bad enough. Coaching them into posting is just plain cruel Steve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kingfish Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Here's one: "3 scenario demo pack from CM2 now availible for download! To get yours just e-mail Steve directly!!!" ------------------ "I do like to see the arms and legs fly" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Originally posted by Seanachai: Tell them the best place to get a PBEM is the Peng Challenge Thread, where all you need do is show up and be polite and friendly, and people will give you a game. It worked for me. Granted, I lost all the games but I got them. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
109 Gustav Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Typing Shift-Bigshields (Shift- gives all your units shields to help them deflect bullets. See them, the green and red boxes they're sitting on? Typing Escape-Control-Command-Reset on a Mac will give all your units unlimited ammo, but only if you haven't saved the game for at least 10 turns and you throw away the autosave file. Hitting the GO button 5 times in a row at the start of a turn will make your units go 5 times faster. My personal favorite- When playing TCP/IP, hit the ` key and type "I'm a doofus and I surrender." This will restore all panicked units to good morale. ------------------ Well my skiff's a twenty dollar boat, And I hope to God she stays afloat. But if somehow my skiff goes down, I'll freeze to death before I drown. And pray my body will be found, Alaska salmon fishing, boys, Alaska salmon fishing. -Commercial fishing in Kodiak, Alaska [This message has been edited by 109 Gustav (edited 01-31-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 For me, I was told I was a "newbie" for six months by a german fellow living in London. Go figure. What a practical joker, that one. ------------------ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. - Blaise Pascal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
russellmz Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 not CM, but in delta force there was a guy on a Team King of the Hill server (before novalogic got rid of them ) who wanted the cheat code for a multi-player game. some guy said:"look straight down, then hit 0 and fire" (0 selected your grenade) two seconds later there was a distant explosion and a message:"NAME decided it was all too much" ------------------ russellmz, Self-Proclaimed Keeper for Life of the Sacred Unofficial FAQ. "They had their chance- they have not lead!" - GW Bush "They had mechanical pencils- they have not...lead?" - Jon Stewart on The Daily Show [This message has been edited by russellmz (edited 01-31-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thermopylae Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Tell them that troops get a morale bonus if their platoon HQ unit is in front of them when charging because they see their leaders beign courgaeous. When they ask 'cool, they model that?" just say "yeah, of course...its CM (attach your personal smiley preference)" Tell them that artillery spotter sare best kept hidden behind ridges because even though they can't trace a LOS to the enmy, thie rindirect fire can. Tell them TRP's are essentially areas that have been pre-sighted in on by your tanks. If they fire at an enemy on the TRP, their almost guaranteed a hit. Tel them moving their tank will result in it no longer being valid because the careful pre-sighting has been lost. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Commissar Posted January 31, 2001 Share Posted January 31, 2001 Select an enemy unit of your choice and type "666gunnybunny666" This will make selected enemy unit imprevious to logic and all orders given to it by the enemy player. In a PBEM/TCP/IP game, when the enemy gives an order to the unit you have affected, the messege "not before Translucent Lighting, not before Translucent Lighting, not before..." will appear across the enemy player's screen, until said player is too disgusted and annoyed to continue the game, giving you the win. This code can be used an unlimited number of times if you are playing against any member of BTS team. Cheers! ------------------ "...Every position, every meter of Soviet soil must be defended to the last drop of blood..." - Segment from Order 227 "Not a step back" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts