Seanachai Posted June 14, 2001 Share Posted June 14, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng: Right! Shandorf and Berli, that's my last word on the subject. Shandorf and Berli are the WineCape tourney reps of the 'pool. So let it be written, so let it be done. Peng<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Once again the process has run its course. The People (and others) spoke, and their words were examined, and found mainly to be gibberish, lies, sputtering abuse, and boasting. Their desires were heeded, and then quickly set down on some newspaper, wrapped in it, and carried on a shovel out to the curb. Their will was expressed, and we compomised by doing what had to be done, and ignoring their sodding will altogether. All in all, it was a very typical Peng Challenge Thread experience. Peng has sent the email. Berli, the Evil One, and Shandorf, the Peng Challenge Thread's answer to incontinent pit bulls (as in: what would you least like to play against in a gentlemanly tournament) have been selected to represent us in the Winecape Invitational. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted June 14, 2001 Share Posted June 14, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: Pardonnez moi, mon Capitaine, but I am and have been for quite some time what you like to refer to as "...a square...". So, like it or not, I suck no scum, especially from the likes of you, who are neither witty nor imbued with the tenets of knighthood. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hmm. Hmmmmmmm. That post actually smacks of, dare we say, intended disrespect? Certainly the content is weak and the structure appalling, but there is some distinct effort there somewhere. If I were one of those creepycrawly lawyer types I could probably mold it into some horrifyingly large mound of crap, but I shan't bother. Anyway, you say you've been a SSN/square for "quite some time", but I only recall seeing claw marks on the drapes and little poo stains in the corners for the last couple of weeks - about the time the headaches started. Your perception of time is obviously markedly different from that of human beings. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> I am beginning to sense, what with Shagdorff's recent...disply, that there must have been a break in the cesspool recruitment process some time ago. Maybe with the giddiness of the games release, Peng authorized a "Free Kaniggethood -- Today Only!" special or something. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I will admit to having a poor understanding of my passage into Kaniggethood. I remember a swell party, some tasty punch, and then waking up the next morning with a bad hangover and The Lorak wuz heer tatooed across my buttocks. It's all a mystery in between. But such mighty events and mysteries are hardly yours to question. <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Now, invariably, those dim-wits, half-wits, and lack-wits must surely come from that bunch. Doll'em you are not fooling anybody with your pretentions to kaniggethood. We all know that you still lick the slime off the boots of any passersby you meet. Why don't you go volunteer to become the head of Jan's-shorts pep squad. You even get a baton! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> "Doll'em" huh? And that's funny....why? <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> And as for your oh-so-punny name for me, all I can say is: I would rather be a pair of panties (and if I were panties, they wouls be the satiny Victoria's Secret kind) and live in the world of panties, than to scratch out the wretched existence that you must lead DoLamb! [ 06-14-2001: Message edited by: panties<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Wow. That last bit is a fat bank account just waiting to be enriched if there are any therapists in the house. Any takers? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted June 14, 2001 Share Posted June 14, 2001 Lorak, Babra has sent a surrender my way. Do not bother to enter anything. I expect we will play when the lure of death, destruction and mayhem strikes him again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Geier: Unless you count Colin the dachshound of course <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Colin is dead? *Sniff!* I can still hear his happy little Yap!, Yap!, Yap! as he scampered and gambled amongst the battlefield dead, gnawing on the chewy bits and dragging home larger unidentifiable bits. Surely you are mistaken kind Sir Geier, (can I call you Shirley?), the low profile of Colin has rendered him invulnerable to the lowest of low shots. Pray bring us evidence of this atrocity, his dog tags for instance. Hehe, geddit? Are there any other witnesses to this War crime? Until proof of this brave little soldiers demise is brought before the tribal elders, Colin will be listed as MIA. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandorf Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Gentleworms of the pool, I accept your nomination and your revulsion with thankless thanks and general aloofness. But I assure you I will do my best to bring dishonor and general loathing to the name of all Pooligans when I meet in arms against the out-boards and grogs. Fear not but I will go above and beyond the call of duty to sneer, belittle, berate, and bask in my, as Fancy-Lad puts it, chest thumping. Nay, I will show no favoritism when it comes to this task, because while you gentleworms are the lowest of all beings, they are the slime you tread about in while you go about your meaningless lives. For I will show them what it means to play a pooler. Bugger off, Jeff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 And don't come back till your finished! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lawyer: From what evidence we have at hand, the safer assumption would be that modern plumbing facilities are not part of the exciting lifestyles of these Ozzies.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> What'd'ya'mean? Our dunnies are right up there with the rest of 'em. Check out this fine example of Aussie high-tech dunny development: Next time, do some research before you mouth off! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted June 15, 2001 Author Share Posted June 15, 2001 OK..the slate is now clear for two additional PBEM games. I would prefer to play jshandorf as I feel he is the only one left in th pool who han't been smacked around by me. And I would also like to try Y2K out. Time is precious for me right now so choosing a game is not a real option for me now. Hell set up phase will tax my time. But anyone who has wanted their ass handed to them by me can feel free to send a set up. Here is your chance to play a real pro folks...not some cut rate piker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdmorse Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Elvis, yeah you ya baby diaper sniffer/washer. I'll gut and fillet you. If you remove that string of albatross-like draws that Seanachai and I manged, I'd say we are evenly matched. Any preferences before I deprive your addle brained sleep depraved existence of further justification to draw air? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Do ya feel lucky Elvis?, well do ya, punk? I've seen your house in Memphis boyo and to be honest, it sucked! Your sequinned suit collection was camp and the Cadillacs were as Cadillacs are, gas guzzling piles of overweight, underhandling, underpowered crap. Much like yourself really. Have another fried hamburger barge-ass and send a set up. The question you gotta ask yourself is, did I fire 5 shots or 6? Punk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted June 15, 2001 Author Share Posted June 15, 2001 Stuka, I knocked you around with the beta demo and I'm happy to do it again. Morse, you too. Both of you send set up files. And my dance card is once again full and as aways it is full of male dancers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Elvis,Elvis,Elvis, you are so obviously the obese, pill popping Elvis of early 70'sdom and not the suave, hip thrusting, lip curler of 'Blue Hawaii' fame, when red jumpers and white slacks were 'En Vogue'. I have never played you. You, as so many others before, have fallen into the rather easy to spot trap of confusing me with that defiler of pet cemetaries Von Shrad, who goes by the E-Mail name of Stuka. (I'm the one with the siren attached to my undercarriage) I'm at work at the moment (a passtime foreign to you I know) so if you would be so kind to organise a set up yourself, I'll happily slap you 'round the chops. Should you wish to discuss conditions in a gentlemanly fashion like the man-child you are then respond forthwith. *Slap! Slap! Slap!* Punk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted June 15, 2001 Author Share Posted June 15, 2001 Stuka, you are probably correct about the von Sham thing. My brain currently too fried from lack of sleep to think of a good game. If you return from work and there is nothing in you mailbox from me then set something up yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Ahh, Senor The Lorak let it be carven that Mister Speedyhump and I just completed a small TCP/IP game in which I inflicted a topplement of obscene proportions. Although the AI saw fit to gift me with the perfect mix of forces and perfect terrain in which to use them, and said AI cursed my unworthy and unwashed opponent with a toilet plunger and a burnt-out kitchen match with which to defend his village, stiil and all, I revel in this rare victory. Sing from the sewer grates (do we have those) dalem: Win Speedyhump: Loss Kinda rolls off the tongue, don't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedbump Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: Ahh, Senor The Lorak let it be carven that Mister Speedyhump and I just completed a small TCP/IP game in which I inflicted a topplement of obscene proportions. Although the AI saw fit to gift me with the perfect mix of forces and perfect terrain in which to use them, and said AI cursed my unworthy and unwashed opponent with a toilet plunger and a burnt-out kitchen match with which to defend his village, stiil and all, I revel in this rare victory. Sing from the sewer grates (do we have those) dalem: Win Speedyhump: Loss Kinda rolls off the tongue, don't it?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Ah, 'tis sad, but true, Sir Lorak...I can only assume that the Pilot of the fighter-bomber the AI probably bought for me was too busy showing the British Ladies his etchings, to come to my aid. Speedbump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 Congratulations to Berlichslingelfingen and Handdork on your elevation to tourney wanks. You'll make great bunkmates. Go forth and slay. Now, sod off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace: Our dunnies are right up there with the rest of 'em.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Durn fine example. What we Amis brought to the party, was cutting the hole in the floor. Run along, ya heard it here first. You can say it was your idea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Stuka: Colin is dead? *Sniff!* Surely you are mistaken kind Sir.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I am never mistaken. And surely surely is spelled shurely? This is the Grandfather of all the Colins we are talking about, the 100 years war lasted between 1337 and 1453 (they couldn't count back then) which reminds me that no one back then, ie no one clever enough to be born in Europe, had even heard about stupid places like Australia or America. Fret not, Our Colin is still scampering about, dodging mortar shells and gnawing the naughty bits from bloated carcasses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stalin's Organ Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark-who-can't-count: Durn fine example. What we Amis brought to the party, was cutting the hole in the floor. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> And of course you brag about it. What a shining example of what happens when you discover 'Merka - you also get too much sewerage for the ol' midden! No-one NEEDED indoor plumbing before 'Merka - thanks a lot you dork! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 You know, if that stupid GIT who goes by the moniker of a Communist Romance Novel hangs out here long enough, one of us squares is eventually going to have to destroy him and force a withdrawel. Until I manage to drive Mortyr away with the peaceful hamlet of Crodaburg; until I show Parambulator the door with my own ultimate gamey defensive QB; until Col. Sanders decides to go back to the chicken coop after an unsuccessful foray into the Valley of Trouble v.2; until then my platter is full, so would one o' you chaps mind giving our Communist Porn Star the bum's rush? Well, now that we have crumbled, and like little old women giving our purse to the brute, we hand over our pride and (moreso in my opinion) our disinterest to Jerksbyhandoff, what is left in this trampled hovel we call home? Mayhap we should just chalk it up to one more failure to hold to our guns, just one more time of ducking for cover when the guy next to you is getting muggd, just one more case of pushing the prenant lady out of the way as you escape from the burning building (only to find out later that 1.) some prankster pulled the alarm as a joke and B.) the lady suffered a broken leg from a fall down the flight of stairs -- the pregnancy is still in question.) That is how I feel about you Lords of the Cess right now -- ashamed and disappointed. Man, you all bum me out, send me set-up, all'ya, I wanna kick all your asses. Let's get this thread up over the fence today, I am sick of looking at "andwill" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedbump Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: That is how I feel about you Lords of the Cess right now -- ashamed and disappointed. Man, you all bum me out!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Does this mean you will leave, and never come back?!?!?!? Oh please, I pray to Peng its true!! Speedbump Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: send me set-up, all'ya, I wanna kick all your asses<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> After what seems like years of posting in the 'Pool (I realize it's only been a couple of weeks, but time slows to such a tortorous crawl whenever I inevitably stumble into one of his 500 daily posts) you have finally mastered the basic art of 'Pool taunting! Yes, you came right out and singled out a particular Cesspooligan for some particularly nasty abuse, full of clever put-downs, vague pop-culture allusions, unabashed lies, and questionable literary devices. You have finally advanced beyond the scum-sucking newbie level of weak-tea generic challenges to the 'Pool as a hole (and a hole it is). You have passed you first test as a squire. [Pause to actually read the post to which I am referring.] Oh, wait--never mind. Agua Perdido Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Speedbump: Oh please, I pray to Peng its true!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Did you sacrifice a goat and a bottle of whiskey with that prayer? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jshandorf Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Elvis: OK..the slate is now clear for two additional PBEM games. I would prefer to play jshandorf as I feel he is the only one left in th pool who han't been smacked around by me. And I would also like to try Y2K out. Time is precious for me right now so choosing a game is not a real option for me now. Hell set up phase will tax my time. But anyone who has wanted their ass handed to them by me can feel free to send a set up. Here is your chance to play a real pro folks...not some cut rate piker.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Damn! And just when I was looking to hone my blade for the upcoming tourney. Crushing the likes of Dalem and Seanachai just doesn't cut the mustard as "serious" training. More of a leisure activity if you ask me. Crap! Double Crap! Jeff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted June 15, 2001 Share Posted June 15, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrSpkr: Did you sacrifice a goat and a bottle of whiskey with that prayer?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well, I don't know if "sacrifice" is really the word for what happened. But if it makes you more comfortable.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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