Guest *Captain Foobar* Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Joe Shaw: If THAT last post caused you scroll right, you have some big problems. I cant help it if you run your monitor at 320 X 240 on your Commodore 64. You need to start shopping for a new machine, you cheap bastard. And for the record, the Mutha Beautiful was BUILT on scrolling right. It was the very foundation of our existance. With 150 pages, and over 1000 posts, it was a right scroller's fantasy. Remember your roots, Brother Shaw. And try not to ask a lowly Squire like me for sympathy, how sad is that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Mace: You can argue all you like guys, but... Ziiiiipppppppppp....*PLONK* ...mines far bigger than yours! Oh... how embarassing... Mace's stuffed sock fell out. Guess there's no date for him tonight Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Seanachai: "Useless Cretins That Have Beaten Me While Displaying Questionable Intelligence and Unremitting Luck". Now there's a description that truly fits someone I know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by OGSF: Ah say Knight them widnae further delay....*tha'* as a Joust! Aye! Knight them! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 This jsut in from Wildman: Oh ****! Found the rest of them. YOU SUCK! This would warm my heart... if I had one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 27, 2001 Author Share Posted March 27, 2001 Berli, cease your hiding and skulking and take charge of your ... squire (I use the term in the loosest possible sense). I am not one to meddle, even when the evidence of your neglect is so overwhelming, but consider the following: If THAT last post caused you scroll right, you have some big problems.He was warned once, by several of the members of the 'pool INCLUDING yourself and yet he remains unrepentant. It is a matter of principal, as you well know, not to exceed string length. A violation is a violation and it matters not the degree of violation. You need to start shopping for a new machine, you cheap bastard. That a squire, a mere squire, should publicly show disrespect for a Knight of the CessPool AND violate BTS regulations goes beyond belief. And for the record, the Mutha Beautiful was BUILT on scrolling right. An outright falsehood, Berli, again as you well know. Scrolling right has ALWAYS been anathema to the True Knights of the CessPool. Remember your roots, Brother Shaw. And try not to ask a lowly Squire like me for sympathy, how sad is that.And to cap it all Berli ... he dares to call ME Brother ... and he a mere squire! I ask not for sympathy from HIM Berli I DEMAND his correction by his liege lord ... as is your right and duty. Correct this inequity or I shall be forced to act! Joe oh ... as to the suggestion that your squire be Knighted for his scenario ... since when is SERIAL ARSON one of the requirements for Knighthood? If the clown can't take a town without blowing it to bits and burning the rubble ... he's not much of a squire, let alone a Knight. ------------------ I HAVE LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS HIS. PLEASE TICKLE MY FANCY BY GOING TO DER KESSEL .IF YOU GO HE MIGHT STOP BEATING ME AND USING MY POOR INNOCENT BODY FOR HIS OWN DEVIOUS PLEASURES Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 From the insipid Cole Slaw: it would have been funnier if you had SPELLED it correctly ... it's FILET his ass ... See, now I knew I was going to have to explain this. I do believe, my neuronically challenged comrade, that I did spell the word I intended to place in my message correctly. The word was meant to be an allusion to the Falaise Pocket, which, in my limited understanding of the affair was being carried out in micro form on your lads who were trapped in the Bag-O-Death. Perhaps now Germanboy, who I still don’t believe in by the way, can jolt himself out of whatever gamey* snit he has worked himself into today, by posting a ten page historical account of the incident. Chattering away from Hamsters: . . . insane hamsters beats philosophical lizard Well, lightning does strike occasionally. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I was forced to rush down an exposed hillside to the destination which was placed far closer to your starting point and you were able to advance under concealment the entire way. Just perhaps. But it ain’t over yet, rodentia and I plan to be roasting a number of small skins over the fires from some burning buildings yet. From an Imaginary Entity: . . .will be the day I give my computer up for charity and become a missionary. Notwithstanding the fact that I don’t actually believe in you, but is there any way we can speed this process up? I for one think that the ruination of the entirety of all organised religion could be expedited greatly through the efforts of one such as yourself in the role of proselytiser. If it would help, I would be willing to provide a list of religions upon which you could begin your work and can also provide you with an address to which you can post me your Mac and any partially or wholly completed scenarios and maps you may have on hand. *For full disclosure purposes, I would like to state for the record that I do not have any current games underway with this imaginary entity, but this in no way detracts from the fact that I believe he/she to be a gamey bastard. I would further encourage each and every member of the pool to join me in posting a single line: Germanboy is a gamey bastard to this thread in an effort to drive this non-entity around the twist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamsters Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 All this talk of Foobar and Roborat reminds us that it is time for a new joust for Kniggethood! Gather round, yonder peoples, for like the great Mumakul of yore, we shall stomp about this place in search of the righteous! What knight among ye darest offer forth a squire? What fool squire has the courage to face a new Knight's Challenge so heinous, so blood-curdlingly evil, that it would turn your own mother against you were she to know you played it? Finally, what great and furious knights will manufacture the map, the storyline and the weather? I will take on my customary role to procure the virtual armies that will be commanded by these two doomed souls. Ride forth! And return with two victims! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Aye! Knight them! Must I always be the heavy and the nay-sayer to every hair-brained idea that is concocted here? Apparently I must. In short NO FRICKIN WAY! Neither of these two squires have posted anything even slightly amusing about their joust. Must I remind you that they are here soley for our amusement and not for any attempt to actually win this scenario or certainly not to display any sort of camaraderie or bonding that has apparently taken place? So what if the scenario is a piece of ****e, at least its well lit. How about some taunting on the part of Foobar about who has the larger burning buildings or that the ones he occupies were set on fire with gasoline rather than kero. Do we see any sort of the kinds of amusing dispatches from the front we are to expect from a knight challenge? I say WE DO NOT, and until something even slightly entertaining and showing that some real bile is being spit about by these two mongrels is produced, I will never be in favour of acknowledging either as an equal. Let’s not have another of these knight-them-all-fests just so you can get your worthless acquisitions off your books. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamsters Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Goanna: Let’s not have another of these knight-them-all-fests just so you can get your worthless acquisitions off your books. And a bloody huge ditto on that! Lorak the Hippie's mass knighting of love was understandable last time but these worthless squires (One of which *kick* I hate to say *kick* is ours) don't deserve anything of the sort. Now let's get started on a new challenge and THIS TIME GET SOME LIVE BODIES! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 By the way, what ever happened to this Leeo creature? It's a sad sad day indeed when a bit of red-baiting can't draw someone out, or perhaps even scared him away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 If we are to have another, I say, nay, I demand that Coleslaw pit Aquaman against another. He's a nasty piece of work and should provide the required vitriol. But who can we chuck into teh ring with this pitbull? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Guano: By the way, what ever happened to this Leeo creature? He just sort of disappeared. Did anyone play any games with him? I've put together a pretty cool scenario that would be a great introduction to the cesspool for a couple of squires. I think it's pretty balanced, and it starts off pretty nice, though it's really intended for all hell to break loose about halfway through. Any suckers...er...I mean takers? And what about that Duck Fondler? He made such a show and then once he made a date with shandorf and Seniletea he fell off the map. He's probably going to kill them and eat them. If we don't hear from either one of them after tomorrow evening we ought to send that gamey bastard, Germanboy, over to Minneapolis to check things out. ------------------ "I HATE THIS GAME, YOU AND THIS SCENARIO" -jd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Goanna: several successive posts of blather Are you taking lessons from Farté or something? Trying to fill a whole page with posts by yourself? Get a squire to do it for you. ------------------ "I HATE THIS GAME, YOU AND THIS SCENARIO" -jd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: I ask not for sympathy from HIM Berli I DEMAND his correction by his liege lord ... as is your right and duty. Correct this inequity or I shall be forced to act! Ok Joe here goes: Foobar Thou hast vexed Sir Joe 'I have a lame squire' Shaw. For that I must say to you... Damned well done. Keep this up and you'll get your spurs in no time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: An outright falsehood, Berli, again as you well know. Scrolling right has ALWAYS been anathema to the True Knights of the CessPool. Hate to say this (the hell I do), but he's got you there. Before the Mad Bald Fiend upgraded the forum, we were side scolling around page 20 or so. since when is SERIAL ARSON one of the requirements for Knighthood? Perhaps your feeble brain has failed to grasp whose squire he is Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 ...And another thing Sir Shaw... I train my squires to burn, kill, rape and pillage. Your method seems to be limited to bum polishing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Goanna: Must I remind you that they are here soley for our amusement... Ok, I am amused, therefore my statement stands. Knight them! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roborat Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Goanna: Neither of these two squires have posted anything even slightly amusing about their joust. Must I remind you that they are here soley for our amusement and not for any attempt to actually win this scenario or certainly not to display any sort of camaraderie or bonding that has apparently taken place? So what if the scenario is a piece of ****e, at least its well lit. How about some taunting on the part of Foobar about who has the larger burning buildings or that the ones he occupies were set on fire with gasoline rather than kero. Do we see any sort of the kinds of amusing dispatches from the front we are to expect from a knight challenge? I say WE DO NOT, and until something even slightly entertaining and showing that some real bile is being spit about by these two mongrels is produced, I will never be in favour of acknowledging either as an equal. Let’s not have another of these knight-them-all-fests just so you can get your worthless acquisitions off your books. Point of order, we need some clarification here, this bloody map started this way. That's right, you twits, every single stinking building, bush and tree was on fire as the game started, if the rock could burn, it would have been on fire too. This match has consisted of us, and our idiot forces, wandering blinded and high on wood smoke (I think he slipped some peyote in somewhere), randomly stumbling into each other. I finally get reinforcements, only to have them start right on top of foobars eagle eyed shermans, one 75, on 76w,with the result that I loose a panther(with berli as the commander, who promptly bails and beats Bannisters record for the one mile run off the map)and foofoo looses his crappy A2. That is the summary of the only contact for two months, are you bloody happy now? And Meeks, what the hell is your problem? I don't remember competence being a criteria for squirehood, in fact it appears the complete opposite; and I find it hard to figure how I can be both lily-livered, and ill-mannered? I have never refused a game, with anyone. And as for my activity, my score and total battles played is very similar to many other squires, (and knights). And I still have a perfect record, it's just pointed the wrong way. And after all that work I put in waxing the hamsters, feeding your ego, pretending to pay attention to your incoherent lessons on strategy, you try to dump me. Well, I guess I have two bragging points now, the first squire grabbed, and the first dumped. So if Lorak and community opinion doesn't force you to keep me on (and I would recommend it, otherwise those pictures of you and (censored)using that (censored) as a (censored)will make their way to the site, you thought I destroyed them didn't you, Hah! the squire did learn from his master). I guess I will become the first Ronin. That's right, the one and only masterless squire. Do you really want an uncontrolled Canadian running about? I may revert back to my brainwashed, overly polite self. It's up to you. Although this may all be a moot point, as I see some votes for kniggithood, some from the higher ranking types, just for having the boulders to even play this match, much less stick with it for umpteen patches. ------------------ "With cat-like tread, Upon our prey we steal; In silence dread, Our cautious way we feel." -G&S Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 This just in Mr. Lorak...MarkXXOOXX has gone down hard as predicted. From what he says it was an autosurrender. He never had a chance from the 1st turn when he gave away his approach route with smoke to when my hordes overran him in the end. He was beaten badly from start to finish and we can only thank Allah that the computer put him out of his misery. Elvis : Victor MarkIV : Loser That flurry of challanges I took a while back has been working out pretty well. I am on the road to recovery with Mace. Am beating OGSF more than he knows (consult MarkIV for lessons in how to surrender when your time has come). Beaten chrisl. I won't mention the draw with Seanachi because I don't like his name. Newly started battles with chrisl, LEON, and Davidohmyaikinheaad are all to early to tip my hand at this time. And lizard boy and I just keep on crawling toward mutual death. ------------------ "When they finally put you in the ground..I'll stand on your grave and tramp the dirt down" Elvis Costello Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Roborat: That's right, the one and only masterless squire. Bah. I was a masterless squire before there were kniggets and squires. I thought the whole thing was stupid. Of course, that was before I was elevated. Now I wholeheartedly believe we should enforce it and you should remain a piddly little squire for all eternity. Do you really want an uncontrolled Canadian running about? You idjit. Who do you think started this (expletive deleted) thread? The original uncontrolled canadian himself. Even though he isn't really canadian, and tends to be quite reserved in his behaviour. Nonetheless-- he is, was, and always shall be an uncontrolled canadian rambling through the muck I may revert back to my brainwashed, overly polite self. You're nothing more than a Hiram wannabe. There's already a Hiram, even if he pretends to be someone else, and the last thing we need is three of you (since there's already two of him (it's better than having two meeks' though)). ------------------ "I HATE THIS GAME, YOU AND THIS SCENARIO" -jd [This message has been edited by chrisl (edited 03-27-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OGSF Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Elvis: Am beating OGSF more than he knows (consult MarkIV for lessons in how to surrender when your time has come Wha'a wanker. The A.I decides tha' Ah should have "Veteran" everythin', includin' a 25 round rocket F.O. and four half tracks - all veteran. Sae tha rockets come and go all over tha place lak a mad womans ****e, gone in 60 seconds. Tha veteran half tracks manage tae bog an' immobilize one, then cast tha rest ainta the pyre o' Tank Destroyer sacrifices. Ah'm holdin tha flags, when mah single veteran Hetzer gets tha drop on has TD at 300 yards. With ten shots tha bleedin' thang manages tae "immobilize" tha TD. O'course at's killed by tha Sherman he got in additon tae the TD and a fistful o' half tracks. Meanwhile mah veteran troops are bein' over-run bah tha swarms o' regular pixel heads he managed tae get as well. Sae nae content wi' runnin' a 2 to 1 advantage in units in a meetin' engagement, an' fiddlin' tha code tae blind mah guners, he also thinks at's somethan tae crow aboot. Aye, ye'll likely win this one. Much as a fat boy wi' a baseball bat can manage tae kill a frog ain a bucket. Ye'll prolly get a medal an' all. Tosser. Sir MacOberGrupenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerbastardABCD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by Rubeus: Aye, ye'll likely win this one. Much as a fat boy wi' a baseball bat can manage tae kill a frog ain a bucket. That's the funniest thing I've read in the last 5 pages. ------------------ "I HATE THIS GAME, YOU AND THIS SCENARIO" -jd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roborat Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by chrisl: You're nothing more than a Hiram wannabe. There's already a Hiram, even if he pretends to be someone else, and the last thing we need is three of you (since there's already two of him (it's better than having two meeks' though)). I am well aware of the beginning of this thread, I was there when it was just starting. And your WRONG, I am a Canadian, he is only a wanna-be, that we (politely) tolerate. And as for Hiram, I am polite, he is subservient, there is a difference. ------------------ "With cat-like tread, Upon our prey we steal; In silence dread, Our cautious way we feel." -G&S Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamsters Posted March 27, 2001 Share Posted March 27, 2001 Originally posted by OGSF: Aye, ye'll likely win this one. Much as a fat boy wi' a baseball bat can manage tae kill a frog ain a bucket. Ye'll prolly get a medal an' all. Based on this alone, we would like to file a motion with Lorak that OGSF gains the victory and Elvis the loss for this battle. If the Mutha Beautiful Thread means anything, this stupid blighter should be rewarded for such a fine piece of humor. Come, Lorak, look in your foul heart and realize that this is more important than any score. At the very least, the game should be marked as a draw between both parties and should serve as a lesson, that if any of us loses but loses as well as this, than the loss is a loss no longer. Unless that person be a serf or squire or someone of Japanese heritage. And Roborat, welcome back! We were just testing that evil Lorak, we love you. You've always been our favorite squire! Send us a setup, laddie. Oh, and what did you do with those pictures, anyway? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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