Now is the Challenge of our discontent, made horrid cess by this son of Peng

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by CMplayer:

Go ask on the general forum. Goodbye.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

CMPlayer: My brave Brits crawl through the ground nearly devoid of cover ( pool table with no trees) as he sits calm and collected in a big fat town. Still, the Avres will make him wish he had not chosen to defend forward.

To answer the other question, a Peng is a proto human namesake of a challenge and banter thread started in the days before the scenario forum. Enter at your own risk.

[dalem]

An update? Don't mind if I do.

chrisl: It's Dark, we're Green, no doubt it grow into an unholy mess of some sort. Currently we're skirmishing over nothing important.

Berli: An awesome Germanboy scenario I recommend to all called "Defending the Drop Zone". We've alternated body blows and it just keeps getting more fun, for me at least.

Terence: You know that feeling you get when three German tanks trundle into the sights of three British ambushers and all three Brit tanks miss their first or second shot and then the German tanks blow them to the moon? Well, I was on the wrong side of that feeling last turn. Other than that things couldn't be better.

Lawyer: Has reached the edge of town finally by the profligate use of every frikkin' PzIV ever made!!!! This is a huge buggering scenario that I'm not so sure I can recommend (called "Bank Holiday" I think) - a little too large to do more than hit GO and let the AI do the work. So far that work has involved the loss of about ten billion tanks on each side, and I wonder what I'm going to do about all his infantry now....

Stuka: Worn out from his victory dance where he visciously cheated and gamily defeated me by a hugely hacked point margin, I await his next turn in our rematch - a byte battle called Peter's Pinch.

OBSF: I hate attacking in the snow, and I'm no bloody good at it, which doesn't help me against the Brrrroguing Kiltman of Alcaspaz. Waiting for your next turn, sporran-sipper.

[Terence]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem:

Terence: You know that feeling you get when three German tanks trundle into the sights of three British ambushers and all three Brit tanks miss their first or second shot and then the German tanks blow them to the moon? Well, I was on the wrong side of that feeling last turn. Other than that things couldn't be better.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I have nothing to add other than that Im a gamey bastard, and that since I knew you were there and went looking for you with many Nasty German Tanks, it wasn't an ambush.

So sucks boo.

[CMplayer]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Still, the Avres will make him wish he had not chosen to defend forward.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You bought AVRE's? Heh. Ha! Haa haa ahaa! Bwaaahaaa ahaaa ahaaahaha aa!.. oh...{wiping a tear from his face} someone get me a glass of water...

[MrPeng]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Snip

Now Peng, just to give you a little update. I carry an asp, not a stick, and I do not work out except fighting class, where my ass is routinely kicked by these two really big guys.

Snip

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Why MrSplattyDragoon! What ever are you going on about? Did you think that my little game was somehow referencing you? You are such a silly man. After all, I invited you in, remember?

On another note, assuming for just a moment that you won the game and guessed correctly, since your only quarrel was with the description of the person's equipment, can we then take it that the rest is TRUE? Hmmm?

Lastly, what are you doing walking around with a poisonous snake, anyway?

Peng

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng:

Why MrSplattyDragoon! What ever are you going on about? Did you think that my little game was somehow referencing you? You are such a silly man. After all, I invited you in, remember?

On another note, assuming for just a moment that you won the game and guessed correctly, since your only quarrel was with the description of the person's equipment, can we then take it that the rest is TRUE? Hmmm?

Lastly, what are you doing walking around with a poisonous snake, anyway?

Peng<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Heck ya, I think it was perfectly true and just dandy, cept where I corrected your short falls in research. I even copied it and posted to the numerous I hate slapdragon threads currently running on the forum. Of course I am also not sure about bashing gays since I have never hit a homosexual in my life, even when I was living with two in New Hampshire, but it is possible that one of my bashees in the past was gay and I did not know it, so I have to let that past.

As for the snake, it sure does do wonders for people who are struggling in hand cuffs.

[ 10-04-2001: Message edited by: Slapdragon ]

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

Heck, I will promote you and Mace to Dolt in one ceremony.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Is it true only a master dolt can promote others?

But I know you'll be disapointed you can't promote me because:

chi^2) You're a (tries to put this gently) BLOODY LOWLY ===> SERF* <=== WHO IS NOT WORTHY TO EVEN LICK MY BOOTS, and

e=mc^2) I've already been given the title Nong by someone far more intelligent, attractive and wittier than yourself (refer signature below) - why I bet you don't even have the curves in the right places).

Mace

PS Just to clarify, a dolt is equivalent to what we call a nong in Australia.

{Corrected because Joe Shaw, thingy of the thingy, said so}

[ 10-05-2001: Message edited by: Mace ]

[Mace]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hiram's Ghost:

Do me next!! Please please please<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Do you next?!!!

Ummm...I think a brothel is what you're looking for.

Mace

[Lawyer]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

As for the snake, it sure does do wonders for people who are struggling in hand cuffs.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Now the TRUTH comes out. Slappyfaggin is a porn star who likes to play "rough". If so, he is making a lot more money than the rest of us.

But the MBT is not about money or position, it is all about being clever, cool, and a Lawyer.

But to the matter at hand --

I recommend that Slappywon'tgoaway be re-named Barney Fife or Deputy Dawg.

I really don't care, as either of them are more worthy and entertaining than he. Let us remind the git that we do not need the power of the forum moderator to attach the correct name to him ourselves, no matter what fantasies he tries to pass off here.

I think Barney Fife has a nice ring to it. What say the others?

[ 10-04-2001: Message edited by: Lawyer ]

[Lars]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lawyer:

I think Barney Fife has a nice ring to it. What say the others?

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I like Barney Fife (no bolding for Serfs). As I recall he only gets one bullet. Which is, strangely enough, an exact match for Slappys I.Q.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>I think Barney Fife has a nice ring to it. What say the others?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I think it does him too great an honor. And I might point out to Mace that he's no longer a Squire but has been demoted to Serf by his former liege Seanachai. No, as sound as the Barney Fife idea might APPEAR, let's not give him any more notice than is absolutely necessary. I remind the CessPool that he is under COVENTRY investigation at present ... how would it look to officially recognize him when no one was talking to him?

Joe

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lars:

I like Barney Fife (no bolding for Serfs). As I recall he only gets one bullet. Which is, strangely enough, an exact match for Slappys I.Q.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I like Barney Fife quite a lot. A community oriented policeman with a long standing committment to honest labor, not very flashy, worked with an open hand rather than a closed fist, solved problems without violence, and had the respect of his fellow town folk. Quite an honor if you ask me.

[MrPeng]

Yeah, but Andy always had to get Barney out of those jams he got himself into. Is your backup as reliable as Andy Griffith? Probably not.

I have a serious concern with that show anyway, It is too closely associated with Gomer Pyle, an abomination for which there can be no forgiveness nor mercy. If there was true justice in the world, the kind meted out here by our trusty Justicar and Drain Commisar (check's in the mail, PShaw!), The bones of Jim Neighbors would have been picked clean by carrion crowes in 1972.

So, MrSlappityDragoon if you care to be thought of in the same league as "GAAAAWWWWLEEE!" you go right on with your little Barney Fife, Mayberry pipe dream.

What is it about that accent that drops the speaker's IQ a full standard deviation?

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng:

Yeah, but Andy always had to get Barney out of those jams he got himself into. Is your backup as reliable as Andy Griffith? Probably not.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

No, he is better, because he is about 100 and 2 meters. And he is a full-timer so his officer sense is much better than mine.

[Michael Dorosh]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng:

[sickening kiddie show host voice]

Hi Everybody! Who Wants to play a game?! THATS GRRREEEAT! OK the game we are about to play is called "Guess who I am!" I'm going to pretend to be someone and you all get to guess who I am. Ready? GREAT!

OK, Here we go! [/sickening kiddie show host voice]

[sickening kiddie show host voice pretending to be an outre boarder voice masquerading as a 'pooler voice]

Hey, kids! I don't like any of you because I am so very much smarter and well read. I am a teacher because I am so smart. In fact I'm so much smarter an well read that I have lost all sense of proportion regarding just how important the things I know are in the grand scheme of things. The other really cool thing about me is that I like to pretend to be a sherrif. I get a gun and a badge and a big stick that I can beat the crap out of drunk people with in the back of a car. It's really a cool thing to do. I like to think that traffic tickets are events suitable for a warning shot through the liver. Being a cop is cool. Being a cop who is a teacher and a body builder is even cooler, but I like to bash gays the most. I think my perfect night would be to kick the crap out of a drunk gay guy while politely lecturing him about military history. That would be cool, and you would all be jealous of how cool I am because I know so much and have lights on top of my car and I am so cool.

[/sickening kiddie show host voice pretending to be an outre boarder voice masquerading as a 'pooler voice]

[sickening kiddie show host voice]

OK KIDS! ARE YOU READY TO GUESS??!!

[/sickening kiddie show host voice]

[Peng voice]

Uh, is it Dorosh?

[/Peng voice]

[sickening kiddie show host voice]

NOPE!

[/sickening kiddie show host voice]

[Peng voice]

Uh, huh huh huh ...I give up.

[/Peng voice]

[sickening kiddie show host voice]

You do! then YOU LOSE! and I'm not going to tell you who it is.

[/sickening kiddie show host voice]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh Lord, leave me out of it - I've stayed out of Peng, perhaps Peng can be good enough to leave me out of Peng as well?!?!?

[MrPeng]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Michael Dorosh:

Oh Lord, leave me out of it - I've stayed out of Peng, perhaps Peng can be good enough to leave me out of Peng as well?!?!?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sorry Mickey, I couldn't resist...won't happen again.

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>No, he is better, because he is about 100 and 2 meters. And he is a full-timer so his officer sense is much better than mine. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I don't know about you guys but I just get all tingly when I hear a REAL LIVE OFFICER talk that police talk. Officer Sense, Wow! Like ... 10-4 to the APB about the Perps. Peng, for the love of Gawd what did you SEE in this clown? Was there some spark of wit that he showed for you to actually recommend him to us? Never, NEVER make important decisions while blitzed out of your mind.

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Oh Lord, leave me out of it - I've stayed out of Peng, perhaps Peng can be good enough to leave me out of Peng as well?!?!?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Fair enough Michael, sounds like a reasonable request ... can you take SlopDraggin' with you?

Joe

[ 10-04-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]

[bauhaus]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Richard Morgan:

Peng... PENG?????!!

In the words of His Royal Highness The Prince of Wales - "What does a PENG do exactly? :confused:

Richard<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Geeez, we've never saw that question before. If you need to ask......SOD THE FECK OFF!!!!

[Buzzsaw]

Lars

Turning tail and running like a dog. Pretty funny to see a King Tiger run like that when it sees a couple of infantry squads. You are a yellow-bellied, Crodaberg-hiding bastiche. I will root you out.

Regrettably, most of your men did not have a religious affiliation marked on their dog-tags. I have decided to give them full Zoroastrian burial rites.

(For those who don't want to follow links, it basically involves bathing the body in cow urine, and placing it in a well to be eaten by vultures and decay in the sun.)* I hope this meets with your approval.

Stalins Organ

A rousing good match we had with 'In the Shadow'. That was the first game I have played where one side (usually mine) wasn't completely routed before the last turn. The last turn, gamey flag rush came very naturally to me. I think my proudest achievements in the game were knocking out that ridiculous AVRE, and finally killing that mobile pillbox called a Churchill. This game ended in a draw, a result which,

I suspect, is of little interest to anyone but you and me.

* Please do not construe this as a knock on Zoroastrians. From the little glimpse I had on that web-site, I find just a decent and silly as I find most religions.**

** Hmmm, I guess you might construe that as a knock on Zoroastrians. Go ahead then.

[ 10-04-2001: Message edited by: Buzzsaw ]

[Joe Shaw]

Damned SSNs wander in with their MAINLINE religions, HAH! I saw this years ago and promptly adopted it as MY religion:

Wauism

I personally think it has a lot to recommend it to the CessPool.

Joe

[Slapdragon]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw:

Damned SSNs wander in with their MAINLINE religions, HAH! I saw this years ago and promptly adopted it as MY religion:

Wauism

I personally think it has a lot to recommend it to the CessPool.

Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I am personnally rather fond of the Quakers, (Church of Friends) since I am one, and I can honestly say that none would recoil in horror if a Penger came in the door.

[Hanns]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bauhaus:

Where are Hanns and Mistress Jean when you need them?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

You called for me? Sorry 'bout the long delay m'lord. I was down in the dungeon checking on who was still amongst the living and who was to be dinner. I almost missed your call due to the prattlings of another SSN (Crapnoggin or somefink) who dares defile the MBT with his pretentious groggy blatherings. I also found a latex fist, appears to have been used, if anyone is interested.

The point of this ridiculous post is that well upon a fortnight ago I offered up a invitation to certain prominent members (he-he I said members) of this board to join me at a local (well local if you live in Minneapolis) den of inequity known to the neighbors as Satan's Pit or as the sign above the door says: Ground Zero. It was in the spirit MBT a Challenge of sorts to which a suitable retort has not been offered. I offered my services with the benfits of

1) getting them in for free

2) me buying them a drink or two

and finally

3) introducing them to the evil and delightful Mistress Jean of

www.MistressJean.net

It appears that my offer has not been ignored but merely passed on to others. The offer is still standing and I suppose I could broaden it others in the Metro area. To the original recipients of the missive I am still waiting for a response whether it be here in the 'Pool or email lest I am forced to out you as it were. To those who are otherwise interested Ground Zero is the local BDSM club in town. Merely the tip of the iceburg as it were in regards to the underground scene but as valid an entry into Hell as another other. I shall spending the remainder of the evening (when I get done with work) there consuming thoroughly alcoholic drinks (at a most reasonable price I might add), watching the "show" and commiserating with my Favorite Lesbians.

One last thing, are there any SSN left for me to kick around? If any Knigget has some unworthy moldering pile of dung that has somehow evolved into a lifeform of greater complexity than the aforementioned Crapnoggin I would be willing, nay eager to stomp them a new arsehole with the steel shod hooves of damnation. Send the appropriate means for their destruction and I shall revel in the pain and gnashing of teeth, the sickly sweet taste of blood mixed with fear and my knee bent not to my own selfish desires.

Hanns

[Joe Shaw]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Where are Hanns and Mistress Jean when you need them?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh WELL done Bauhaus ... JUST what we needed about now.

Joe

[OGSF]

Good grief! Which daft bugger as mindin' tha door?

[CMplayer]

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slapdragon:

I am personnally rather fond of the Quakers, (Church of Friends) since I am one<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Oh that fits in great with your love of WWII and Combat Mission. I can see it now (hazy shifting of scene)

A quiet room, with twenty rigid straight backed chairs in a circle. Slappy and the rest of his meeting are sitting in silence. After a while a gentle, calm voice (not slappys) asserts: I feel moved to say that I have found it a spiritual struggle to feel compassion for OBL. More silence. Another voice 'brothers and sisters, the true enemy is our selfishness, greed and hatred. But the light is in all, let us promote the light.' So then Slappy pipes up: "yeah, and the Churchill AVRE made short work of reinforced building strongpoints all across the continent! But personally I prefer flamethrowing tanks and incindiaries since they really take care of the cockroaches!"

Quaker...sheesh...you and Nixon.