Lawyer Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 Many of you have lamented that I don't post enough, so I'll do a quick one this morning to boost the MBT up top again. Elvis I too shave in the shower. It's much more efficient and easier on the back. Plus, sometimes I blow my nose in the shower, and once or twice I might have taken a pee. Cleaning up is a snap when you take care of your bodily functions in the shower. Don't you all agree? Anyhoo, this bit of shared experience and wisdom should get you all off to a good healthy start this morning. It's just another personal service from Lawyer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Captain Wacky: Thats enough for me. See ya in hell suckers!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I think Berli may have something to say about that. Edited because I don't think the mad Scot wannabe OGSF has yet mentioned that he auto surrendered to me in our last game. I really think this was rather inconsiderate of him as only 2 of my 3 infantry companies managed to actually engage his troops before his forces surrendereed. The poor old fellows in the 3rd Company now have to put up with all the slurs and ribbing from the troops in the other 2. [ 09-19-2001: Message edited by: Speedy ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lawyer: Anyhoo, this bit of shared experience and wisdom should get you all off to a good healthy start this morning. It's just another personal service from Lawyer.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I chose to read this snippet of information re your sanitary habits (or lack there of) just before going to bed. I am now so traumatised by it, I believe I'll be having nightmares for the rest of my life. Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 Here I was thinking you were the prime cause of nightmares in this universe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 - Shaving while showering is gamey. - Shaving, defecating, urinating and menstruating while showering is cheating. - Use a Norelco like a real man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buzzsaw Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lawyer: ...Cleaning up is a snap when you take care of your bodily functions in the shower. Don't you all agree? ....<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Actually, I have always thought that it is one of life's strange little quirks that the need to pee when in the shower is so easily met, but that the call to a bowel movement is such a major pain. Gee, I think I'll go back to posting about football. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 Hmmm. That "poo" reference wasn't really the crux of the matter, but if it sufficed to rid us of yet another worthless SSN, well, so be it. I would have preferred to remove him from the 'pool by more noble means, but wtf? Now, can we please move on from the topic of shaving? It has been taken totally out of context, and lost it's meaning entirely. It was originally made in reference to that sodding wank Maximus's idiot question about what to talk about since we could not talk about the WTC I suggested that we talk about the Bald One's baldness and how he manages it. Of course the irony was lost on ol' Max, as usual and then Elvis picked up on it, brought it in here and NOW Lawyer brought it up and added poo to the mix. Anyway, enough about poo, enough about shaving, and don't start talking about shaving poo or there will be some serious blood-letting. Move along...nothing to see here... watch your step...eeeew! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Many of you have lamented that I don't post enough, so I'll do a quick one this morning to boost the MBT up top again.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Come now Counselor (may I call you Coun?), let's see some evidence on that assertion. We of the Justicariate beg leave to express our doubt since (a) "Many" implies ... indeed DEMANDS, more than one, ( Even ONE would be stretching it ... we personally don't know ANYONE who wants to see even one more post from you and finally © no one in the CessPool "laments" ... we certainly bitch, piss and moan, wail and gnash teeth but we DON'T lament. Enough of these vague allegations Lawyer, provide PROOF or shut up ... or just take the short cut and shut up. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 Well well well, there are some rumbling sounds around here (meaning my horrid workplace), that I may be put on a plane and shipped off to Minnesota for a few days in the middle of October. There are TWO reasons for this: b. I work for someone more evil than Berli 42. I work for someone more evil than Berli It will not be good for Minneapolis when I arrive. I will be thirsty, and expect that the liquor laws will be more sane than those in Pennsyltucky, Land of Giants, where no good deed goes unpunished. Peng Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 I think that a lot of excitement is being generated on the Outer Board with the recent posts there. I refer, of course, to the candidacy of young Cauldron for BBS Dunce and Designated Dolt. Smegmarsh, Fledmarshall, GAZ, and a host of lesser and forgotten whiners have met their match this time, laddies. I apologize if this seems petty, as I intended it to be mean-spirited and vicious, but I'm under a lot of pressure here at work. Ciao for now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 19, 2001 Author Share Posted September 19, 2001 Excellent! In the six months (?) since the last set of screenshots from BTS, they have managed to do textures for the KV-1. I think the previous six months was devoted to the textures for the T-34 and Russian infantry, if we discount the few models which they did exclusively for Computer Games Weekly or somefink. At this rate, I should have my Ergonomics degree and a Powermac G8 before CM2 is released! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
von shrad Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> At this rate, I should have my Ergonomics degree and a Powermac G8 before CM2 is released! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I'm not too familiar with British humor other than Benny Hill but, I do think I detect a slight sense of sarcasm. David, care to clarify this a little for your American cousins? von shrad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted September 19, 2001 Share Posted September 19, 2001 I know the reason why. The slob can currently be found swanning around in the American Bashing thread answering stupid questions put forward by, well, erm, me... And a few other detractors. Bloody slacker! StR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by stevetherat: Bloody slacker! StR<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Where is my turn Ratboy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted September 20, 2001 Author Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>von shrad wrote: I'm not too familiar with British humor other than Benny Hill<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Aha, I think I have identified your problem. If you want to put it in the context of TV programmes, have you never seen Blackadder or Red Dwarf? Here, for your benefit, is a gross generalisation about the differences between British and American humour. • Britons tend to understate where Americans exaggerate. • In Britain, it is common to say something in a certain tone of voice which denotes that you mean the opposite. Americans would call it sarcasm, but technically it is irony. Sarcasm is the use of irony in an attack. However, this is the simpler definition of irony. • The more complex definition of irony is something which is satisfactory in absurd circumstances. A good example which sticks in my mind is of a British aircrew flying over the Mediterranean. They need to make an emergency landing, and identify Corsica as a suitable destination, but are unsure who is in control of the island. One of the crew says something to the effect of "Corsica's ours, I read it in the newspaper!". The comment in itself is satisfactory, but in the circumstance that they are part of the armed forces which are conducting the war, to learn the news from a civilian paper is ironic. This may or may not cast any light on my above post. Make of it what you will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
von shrad Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 Damn it to hell! Leave it to the Brits to make everything sound so clear. Now I completely understand. BTW, I have never seen Red Dwarf but some people have quoted some of it here and I found it to be hillarious. Wonder where a gum-chewer like myself could find any of this? BBC America? I'll have to go see. I also see the ...er...irony of it all. Some early German tanks would have been food for the eyes. Or maybe some BT's? von shrad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Marlow: Where is my turn Ratboy?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I know the feeling. The years creep up on you like a rolling fog bank on a deserted moor and, eventually, you lose your sight. CHECK YOUR MAIL YOU FREAKIN BAT! StR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by von shrad: BTW, I have never seen Red Dwarf but some people have quoted some of it here and I found it to be hillarious. Wonder where a gum-chewer like myself could find any of this? BBC America? I'll have to go see.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> It is hilarious, damned hilarious. As is the Blackadder series, Fawlty Towers, Young Ones, Bottom, French and Saunders and Mr Bean. In book form there was the Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy, the disc world series by Terry Pratchet, and Ben Elton's books. I will give that to the Poms, they know how to do very good comedy (shame they suck at all else). Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rune Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 :a creaking noise is once again heard from within the cesspool...no, Mace is not having a go at his rubber sheep again, but the secret trap door opens to once again reveal one of the elders....Rune appears carrying a scroll...the rooms gasps...once again rune holds the scroll of NDA. He approaches the podium and calls forth David Aitken and Von Shrad. Rune speaks: "Bauhaus get those worthless gimps up here on the double...use any means necessary." :The mere threat hurries the two along to the podium: As he being to beat the hapless two with the scroll of NDA, he yells at them: "You toothless, worthless gits. Do not use the name of Krazydog in vain...the boy has got to do the 3D models BEFORE he starts on the skins. Even a SSN can see that. You two should be hung and quartered, but even that would be too good for the likes of you. Let the BTS crew work, I have seen the future, and there is more hellfire then even Berli can stand. Be patient, or I will insist you be locked in a room of Australians and Finns debating endlessly who had the better troops." :With a few more slaps to their heads with the scroll of NDA, Rune sends them to the deepest part of the cesspool to ponder their doubts. With another creak, he disappears down the trap door and a lock is heard slamming shut... Rune [ 09-19-2001: Message edited by: rune ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
von shrad Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Rune sends them to the deepest part of the cesspool to ponder their doubts. With another creak, he disappears down the trap door and a lock is heard slamming shut... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hey look over there. It is a whole wall full of wine. This can't be too bad, except for the company. von shrad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Enough of these vague allegations Lawyer, provide PROOF or shut up ... or just take the short cut and shut up. Joe<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You have my word, which is better than "proof" that could be misinterpreted. If you were a gentleman, instead of Just-a-Car, you would need nothing more. Obviously, you have once again failed to be useful, which I must presume is your true mission in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>You have my word, which is better than "proof" that could be misinterpreted. If you were a gentleman, instead of Just-a-Car, you would need nothing more.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Let's see if I've got this right, we have: A CessPudlian ... who is ... A LAWYER ... who ... Works for the Government ... and ... Alleges that we should TAKE HIS WORD! Right. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
von shrad Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 Oooooh. I'm so excited. Red Dwarf is on tonight on BBC America. I hope it meets my expectations, which are for a very silly show. If it is like anything I recommend, it will be it's worst show. Do you Brits enjoy a good American classic such as Airplane or Animal House? Sonds like they could be along the same genre, without those great accents and bad teeth. von shrad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by von shrad: Hey look over there. It is a whole wall full of wine. This can't be too bad, except for the company. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Aitken, here's where you say "for the love of god, Montressor..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSpkr Posted September 20, 2001 Share Posted September 20, 2001 Well, first Maximus, now Losername. Now if we can just get Lawyer to follow suit . . . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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