PeterNZer Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 AAR: Chupacabra vs Germanboy - While at the Pub A glorious hour of battle between two knights here in London started with a couple of pints at the pub. Soon the laptop was pulled out and battle commenced! Chupacabra had the axis forces and a 500pt computer chosen force. The evil Germanboy a 500pt Yanky force chosen by the computer and a mechanized meeting encounter began. From the first turn it was clear Chupie would have a hard time. His 2 platoons of infantry and 4 or so halftracks were all GREEN. Whereas Andreas enjoyed a verteran Engineer platoon and 4 or so vet haltracks and a vet jeep. Andreas raced to the VL and deposited his force in the little town. Chuppie advanced more carefully, but was soon spotetd by Andreas. A short battle began where each agressively moved their halftracks to try and suprise and gain advantage over the other. Unfortunately Chupi's troops ran at the sound of a lit fart and his halftracks died like flies, the battle was almost over when the battery on Chupi's laptop ran out and the game ended. A brave attempt by Chupi in the face of difficult odds, but Andreas caried the day! PeterNZ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chupacabra Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 It wasn't really a matter of advancing carefully or not - when you've got a 30 second command delay, it just looks like you're advancing carefully. I was trying to haul ass ------------------ Soy super bien, soy super super bien, soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super. [This message has been edited by Chupacabra (edited 10-13-2000).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 ahh an update on my lastest bungles. OGSFB... Has finally decided that artillery that falls with 100 to 200 meters gap between shells is usless and sent his FO home. I really had to many men at the begining and I got confused. Now that he has weeded out the chaff for me. I might be able to do something. Not win! That would be against my very nature. But something. Moriarty...Well, when we started this battle Mori said it would be a fight to see who wanted to lose the most. Guess I'm winning at something then. God how I hate shermans and thier blind TCs. Germanboy... Just started. I'l post again when I'm losing....tomarrow? Meeks... Much like I laugh at hamsters, when they scratch at the glass corners in thier cages, getting nowhere. I laugh at Meeks tactics. I'd be foolish to say I'm winning. But eliminating an entire platoon for the loss of about 4 of my men. Gives me hope. Berli... Still waiting for Satan to ring hells bells and signal the start of my distruction. Good news is that not only will Berli have fun laughing at me, But Fionn has decided to peer down from heaven, at my setup, and laugh his arse off too. Seanachai...Yes, it appears that I've lost this one too. Does my pain have no end!? Battle will be over soon, due to turns or my surrender, I know not. I'm glad I have given him a bloody nose, but saddend that future generations will miss out on a Rommel land mark. Yes sometime ago it was said that my id/ego was shattered. Nay, after my latest string of PBEM games, I find it already scrambled and fried into an omlet. I guess I need to go back and read my books again. I have: "AoP: Infantry tactics" "AoP: Armor on the move" and " The care and feeding of your new Hamster" what am I missing? By the way: If anyone lives in the winston-salem,NC area and has no life. Feel free to meet me at the waffle house at Hwy52 and hanes mill road. I'm there everynight around 12:30am. I'll be the idiot reading obscure WWII books and drawing up battle plans on napkins. Just ask Rhonda, Penny, or Dwaye the cook to point me out. God I have no life... Lorak the loathed. ------------------ "Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats Cesspool Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>What's that, oh thats right, sorry, you wouldn't want to have a squire thats already given you a thrashing would you.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Grovel in the presence of your betters, whelp! You dare petition to have me sponsor you!? Where is the list of your black hearted deads. Where is the proof that you are evil enough to serve as my squire? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Still waiting for Satan to ring hells bells and signal the start of my distruction<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oops, thought I had sent it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by patboivin: OGSF, I don't know if anyone will ever want to sponsor me, because I was assimilated many months ago by the CM Borg! I am tainted now. No one wants to play with me. So far I've won about half the games I played, so if anyone wants to take me on your odds are 50/50. Better than the lottery! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Well, you'll never get a game in this thread with that opening gambit. "Boo, hoo. Nobody will play with me" and a substandard attempt at the "beat the odds" bit. You want game, boy-o, then pick one or two out and give them a proper taunt and challenge. The name of the thread may have changed, but the ground rules haven't. ------------------ "Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?" — Oddball "Crap." — Moriarty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OGSF Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by patboivin: OGSF, I don't know if anyone will ever want to sponsor me I am tainted now. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> HEADS UP! You mewling clumps of rodent ear wax! Not for me to say of course, (just being a squire who kicks any sloppy butt that happens to think they can stand against me in PBEM), but I propose this fellow patboivin for sponsorship as a Squire of the Pool. His taunting is feeble but should come on with some coaching and practice. He *does* have the game,and is therefore eligible and available for a joust. He has often times thrown his troops under the blazing muzzles of my guns and may justify the faith of some Noble Knight in his worthiness by winning his joust. What say you, groin rashed Kanniggets, who will sponsor this patboivin fellow? OberGrupenBloodyStompinFeuhrerBastard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OGSF Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bastables: yababa yabba doo! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh Blusterbubbles, you glistening droplet on an old man's nostril hair! Have your lads come on calmly if you will - there is nothing to hurt them in my arsenal. Really, trust me, come on now, it will be alright. My boys are sleeping and their wooden rifles and swords are laying on the ground nearby. Oh, and bring your tanks with you... OberGrupenBloodyStompinFeuhrerBastard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 Until Patboivin can manage some sort of worthy, righteous, vile, ill-mannered, cess-filled taunt/challenge of squirrel or knigget, he should remain unsponsored, to my way of thinking. My card's full with squire-whelp Stuka, who does at least put forth a decent taunt. ------------------ "Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?" — Oddball "Crap." — Moriarty [This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 10-14-2000).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OGSF: His taunting is feeble but should come on with some coaching and practice. He *does* have the game,and is therefore eligible and available for a joust. He has often times thrown his troops under the blazing muzzles of my guns <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Yeah, but he's tainted like a jar of undercooked tomatoes. Filled with a nasty toxin generated by his vile flesh being devoured by an army of Clostridia. And just because he's fool enough to lose to you doesn't mean anyone else should have to deal with his odiferousness. Being tainted, he ought to smell pretty nasty, like something your dog might enjoy rolling in, but I'd worry that even the files he emails would be too vile to put on my machine. [This message has been edited by chrisl (edited 10-14-2000).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FutbolHead Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 Alas, with the TCPIP update, we see a time drawing close at hand when I will be able to properly submerse into the 'pool in earnest. Then we shall see which of the squires and which of the knights shall hand me humiliation or manicure the nails of my hamsters. Mind you, my hamsters were trained by the best of shrews, and their nails are long. A manicure was never so dangerous. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> WoolyBullied: I think Geier might be a commie too, he's been playing mind games with me and I'm now not entirely sure if I'm playing him or not, or if I have to send a file or not. Same with P-Broom, I think it's a commie European plot. {Snipped} You horrible little frenchy! I will check my mail tonight and see what's going on. I think it must have been JDmorse confusing me with his plan to drive around the map through the snow and at night, never meeting me and thus force a draw out of me, rather than face the wrath of my forces! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Unto you my little confused fella. A setup is coming your way and it is of the 800 Pts meeting engagement, small map variety. This was done as a result of your display of misunderstanding all along your posts. All the rest is default setting. You cannot fail to find your opponent this time. No rain, no fog, no snow, no smog. No excuse for short. And since you've been so proud in your knowledge that if push come to shove, YOU STILL ARE NOT FRENCH, you are the Frogs on this one. Boy you had it coming really... ------------------ Will you trade your Peng for a box of Seanachai? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mensch Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 my computer crashed and I blame jerryboy and smoochachi and Pung... all your fault.. crap. *sigh* at least installing my games will be easy since I only play CM now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bullethead Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 (message found by a Cesspool hamsterherd stapled to the back of a returning stray member of his flock) OK, you reeking heap of scum-encrusted, plague-ridden hampster droppings, you collection of carbuncular pox-scabs on the posterior region of a malarial nutria, you shower of PENG-SCHMOOZERS!! This has gone far enough. The earlier incarnation of the Cesspool was a multiversal catastrophe, but this new pseudopod of Stygian bat guano has strained the inter-planar boundaries to the point that its excrescence is oozing into my Domain. I demand satisfaction. Delegate some footling lackey to come clean up the mess. Failing that, send me the head of Girly-Thingen in a bucket of Chlorox. ------------------ -Bullethead In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is strength, in water there is bacteria. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Bullethead: I demand satisfaction.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> And? ------------------ Will you trade your Peng for a box of Seanachai? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 Greetings Gentleworms: I have lost all hope that you lot of putrescent, febril pantie-stains will appropriately and with mal-intent verbally scourge Hamsters/Meeks(!). Given this state of non-affairs it has come to my remaining neurons that not a single one of you is worth the pus in $10 whore's venerial sore. I am therefore through with the whole stinking mess of you. Updates: the lowercase chrisl - he is using the shopworn tactic of boring the enemy to death. get on with it mrno-caps. Squire Stuka: dont tell him but one of my tanks is bogged and if things go the way they usually do for me it will become immobilized in the coming 15 seconds. no matter, i'm sure the rest of them will become faustian victims or wind up on the nasty end of a 'schreck. our raining at night scenario is really quite vile. my only solace is that I will soon be able to warm things up a bit with some of my several wasps that are prowling the sleepy little hamlet. Moriarity: he is a complete fool. He has two thirds of his infantry sitting in the same spot for the last three turns while I have blithely rained 105s on him; pinning his little blousey boys while I have captured both VLs and set up me defenses. This while keeping plenty of my sturdy iowa farm boys in reserve to save the day when things look bleak in a few turns. He has brought a little SP into the arena which will soon fall to one of my specially trained zook teams. Germanboy: this is a tough one. he as taken out one of my HeckCats with his heavy AC (how I HATE them! the same blasted vehicle that MKIV used with such devestating effect in our last game after he lost Two of his namesake AFVs). Anyway, this one is wide open, with each of us holding a VL and not much incentive to move on the other guy. We have both established strong defensive positions in our respective zones, and the one who moves first is likely to get bitten hard by a nasty sharp toothed rodent of one variety or another. Elvis: In the WestWall Op, we are both slogging around in the rain in the dark. one of my 75 pillboxes has been hammering away at wooden bridge trying to get it to fall before any more AFVs can get accross, while one of his AFVs has been hammering away at the same PB from behind it for several turns. it is like two old ladies trying to pat out fires on each other's tummies. He also got hold of one of my roving HTs and made it dead. That seems to be about it. I dont think I have any other games going...except oh wait that's right I ALREADY BEAT Hamsters/Meeks(!)! Die, all of you Peng ------------------ "I hope a bucket of nails falls on your head..." Hamsters/Meeks(!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng: Given this state of non-affairs it has come to my remaining neurons that not a single one of you is worth the pus in $10 whore's venerial sore. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Now would that be an European or an African whore? ------------------ Will you trade your Peng for a box of Seanachai? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon: Now would that be an European or an African whore? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> French! ------------------ "I hope a bucket of nails falls on your head..." Hamsters/Meeks(!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chupacabra Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 UPDATES! My dismantling of SkeeterHTer seems to be going at a fair pace. He has no more tanks, and I have lots, and if I have to blast his infantry out of every bloody hidey hole in France, I'll happily do so, and I've got 30 more turns in which to do just that. HE + Fallschirmjaegers = squishy! Choada and Boreiarty have apparently decided to join convents where the sending of pbem files is forbidden. Or it could just be that they're a bit scared of what's coming next, given the way the past turn went for each. Lots of my things going KA-POW, and lots of their things going BOOOM! MEDIC! And their will soon be lots more. If I get some files, that is. ------------------ Soy super bien, soy super super bien, soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng: French! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> You're showing some sense and good taste to boot. French whores are highly tuned professional considering they are competing in a country where you could easily find the same kind of services benevolently. ------------------ Will you trade your Peng for a box of Seanachai? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 Small map PeterNZ Finding me should be a snap Steadfastly loosing… ------------------ Will you trade your Peng for a box of Seanachai? [This message has been edited by PawBroon (edited 10-14-2000).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 Game updates: Pawbroon: Nice gunfight in the woods, but he's lost a smattering of little ACs, light tanks and the like. He did nail my Puma, but that was a consolation prize as he was aiming at the Jagdpanzer. Chuppy: True to form, I shot myself in the foot on the first freakin' move. The convoy of trucks loaded with Infantry and such was on "move" instead of "fast." and did not reach their disembarcation points. A nicely placed arty barrage has done some damage there. Berli: Game still in flux. Timely arrival of the Polish Air Force waxed a Jagdpanther. 88mm bunker under heavy smoke. Blousehausmaus: Next couple turns will determine the game. Armor and Infantry locked in combat. Your turn to lose, I believe. Geier: His armor is kicking the bejeesus out of my valiant gum-chewers ... aided by a pair of zooks that couldn't hit a barn from 20m. Goanna: Returned from Tarawa to find that nasty, immobilized HMC is still there, despite heavy arty. Immobile for the last 10 turns or so, this ballsy crew has toasted a mortar crew, Wirblewind and a Pz IVG. I might not win the war, but the HMC has made the fight worthwhile. Hiram: We have met again on the battlefield but it's too early to tell. jdmorse: His forces of evil have kicked the snot out of my preliminary defenses, but he has felt the heat of the Zippo team and spent a good deal of time and effort on a cantankerous 105mm howitzer. lorak: The softy just won't put the hammer down on TC Schutz. Dancing back and forth from behind a building, his (last?) M4 fell victim to Schutz, who dispatched it with one shot. Peng: Sodbuster has turned a lot of earth, but hasn't done much damage yet. Seniletea: Too scared to return my setup of evil, I guess. ------------------ "Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?" — Oddball "Crap." — Moriarty [This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 10-14-2000).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hiram Sedai Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 "...always with the bad vibes, Moriarty. Always with the bad vibes!" -Odball Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Sheepthingie from made-up country: And bloody sorry you should be! Couldn't take 5 minutes out of your busy moose-fondling comitments to open a file and send it back? Goodness me!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> And his next "post" (now to Andy-I-wish-Sealion-had-worked) contained the following wisdom: <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>blabla bla some of us have work to do, (yes, real work, not that playing with the environment mumbo-jumbo) and that work entails having to stay here till bloody late and being tired and going to bed early. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> It is now Saturday night and I still haven't seen any files from Mr SheepishNZ. If I didn't know better I would call him a scared little chicken. But we all know him as our terrified little sheep. Bääää! Bääääh! Btw, has anyone seen what two 9cm RCL AT guns can do to a moose from 500 meters? I have. Pwetty. Even with just concrete shells. ------------------ Johan "The succesful execution of a well devised plan often looks like luck to saps." Dashiell Hammett Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chupacabra Posted October 14, 2000 Share Posted October 14, 2000 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Geier: Btw, has anyone seen what two 9cm RCL AT guns can do to a moose from 500 meters? I have. Pwetty. Even with just concrete shells. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Has anyone seen what a moose can do to the front grille of a Dodge Dart doing 60 mph? Not pwetty. ------------------ Soy super bien, soy super super bien, soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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