Lars Posted October 23, 2007 Author Share Posted October 23, 2007 Arr! To the mast with ye till ye learn to sing! You should see the barking mad Scotsman we have for a Captain. Makes OGSF look like the voice of reason. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Boo Radley: Seanachai, you cur! Did you have a good time? Did you make an arse of yourself? Did your family disown you? Have you read 'Making Money' yet? Are you EVER going to send me another turn? I had a good time, odd as that may seem. Shortly I will send someone who can host them pictures of me defiling the Australian flag at Epcot, and bidding adieu to Cinderella at breakfast after a night of passion in the castle (the Prince was away...) Each night, as our party returned home from dinner, I was told that I had to ride in the 12 person van because all the children insisted I sing to them the "Hymn of the Immaculate Digestion", called by some the "Song to Great Fred". It was a bit odd to hear a gang of kids shouting along with the refrain 'And he's promised that he'll eat me when I'm dead!' at the top of their lungs. Especially when all of them come from profoundly Catholic families. It should occasion some consternation when they return to their parochial schools and spread the glad word about their new deity. Well, as the paddling season has all but ended (there is a chance that Thursday of this week will be nice enough for me to get out one last time), work has come to an end (at least for the nonce), and all family trips are over for the year, you lot of horrible little men may see more of my presence. And as regards this kayaking season just ended, I will now give you my totals for the season, with the proviso that they may change a bit if we do have another nice day or two. Between mid-April and mid-October I was out paddling 38 times, and was butt-in-seat, paddle-in-hand for 108 total hours. On rivers and lakes I paddled a total of 229 miles, 53 of it on rivers and 176 on lakes. My longest river paddle in a single day was only 13 miles, but my longest paddle on a lake was 15.5 miles, which is not bad in a single day on water without a current. I now return you to your normal occupation of whinging and squabbling, but I imagine that I will be back later today to shed a bit more of the light of my intellect and wit over the rude and squalid darkness of your minds. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Queer things happen at sea...... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 So, the boat's called the "Windy", huh? Named after Lars, right? Brazen Doxie: "Oh Captain Lars, you're so full of whimsy!" Lars: "Arrr, and can ye tell from over thar? I'm always that way after eatin' radishes!" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Oh, and Boo, I am half way through 'Making Money' (the singing and carousing done at Disneyworld did not leave me much time to read), and I plan to start sending turns again either tonight or tomorrow, depending on whether I get together with a friend of mine tonight or tomorrow night. I have already been over to see Small Emma, and when I told her that I'd had my picture taken with Cinderella, she said, eyes totally round 'For Real?!' When I told her 'yes', my stock went up by several points, it was clear to see. Also, she both amused and disturbed me by informing me during the course of the evening that the teachers at Day Care have told her she shouldn't talk about blood so much. She couldn't, or perhaps simply wouldn't, explain to her Mother and I just exactly what she'd been saying that occasioned this rebuke. Her Mother persisted far longer than I in trying to determine the nature of her discourse, but that is only natural, as it is the job of all Grandma Steves to defend Small Emmas, as it is the job of their mothers to make sure they're not threatening general blood-lettings at their Day Care center. I like to think that she'd threatened to wash the playground clean with rivers of the blood of toddlers after her sister Smaller Nora was pushed down, badly scraping her nose and cheeks. But I think I will simply have to be satisfied that it wasn't Emma who pushed her, rather than that she was rising to her defense and vowing revenge. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 You know, it's a little bit disorienting, this being at home. I mean, it's almost noon and no one has brought me a delicious lunch with a glass of chilled white wine, nor given me a saucy smile while earnestly entreating me to have day filled with wonder. You do it, Boo. Fetch me a delightful lunch of chile braised pork with rice, and a tumbler of Pinot Grigio. And where's that saucy smile, eh? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Lars: Makes OGSF look like the voice of reason. Wouldn't that disprove the existence of God? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rune Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 And the shame is not once, not once did any of you fire a torpedo at him... or even attempt to run him over in a high powered boat. Seanachai said "Between mid-April and mid-October I was out paddling 38 times, and was butt-in-seat, paddle-in-hand for 108 total hours. On rivers and lakes I paddled a total of 229 miles, 53 of it on rivers and 176 on lakes. My longest river paddle in a single day was only 13 miles, but my longest paddle on a lake was 15.5 miles, which is not bad in a single day on water without a current." Rune 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Bah! Rune, I wave my hand at you. Lars has many times attempted to run over me in his boat. Sadly, for the delusional drunkard, I have never paddled on his lake. Untold tens of kayakers were dispatched by Lars this summer on Lake Minnetonka in his belief that somehow they were myself. It's sad, really. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted October 23, 2007 Author Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Boo Radley: So, the boat's called the "Windy", huh? Actually, if you had sharp eyes, you would have noted that the pic was not rigged as a barquentine. But then again, you're iggernant. That is a pic of the sister ship, and the best I had at the moment. Here's she is, and we will be renaming her. Original pic has been updated too. [ October 23, 2007, 11:31 AM: Message edited by: Lars ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abbott Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Nidan1: Maybe you should wait for the California fires to burn out...Today’s news broadcasts says that the fires are burning from Santa Barbara to the Mexican border. I resided in So. Ca. for many years and I grew accustomed to the bad fires that always accompany the Santa Ana winds this time of year as (I guess) most others did as well. I have driven under flames that were licking across a narrow twisting 2-lane mountain road getting out of Idyllwild while the forestry service trucks were coming up the same road. I have also seen my son evacuate his family from their home in Big Bear but these fires are becoming huge in area! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Seanachai spent FAR too much time going through the "Pirates of the Caribbean" I fear, hence the song. Could have been worse ... he could have gotten stuck in the "It's a Small World" pavilion ... just imagine the song he'd have posted THEN! Ah well ... welcome back the Bard of the Pool. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Lars: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley: So, the boat's called the "Windy", huh? Actually, if you had sharp eyes, you would have noted that the pic was not rigged as a barquentine. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Seanachai: You do it, Boo. Fetch me a delightful lunch of chile braised pork with rice, and a tumbler of Pinot Grigio.(Looks in cupboard...) Hmmm... Campbell's Pork and Beans. (Looks in fridge...) Ahh! A jar of pickles, in which all the pickles are gone and yet the juice remains. Perfect! And where's that saucy smile, eh? (Prepares to drop trou and walk in backwards...) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Seanachai: My longest river paddle in a single day was only 13 miles...All of it against a swift current, I hope. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Wankers. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamstersss Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 He's right, you know. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Elijah Meeks: He's right, you know. <large><large>MEEKS!</large></large> ... have you recanted your heresy yet? Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Abbott: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Nidan1: Maybe you should wait for the California fires to burn out...Today’s news broadcasts says that the fires are burning from Santa Barbara to the Mexican border. I resided in So. Ca. for many years and I grew accustomed to the bad fires that always accompany the Santa Ana winds this time of year as (I guess) most others did as well. I have driven under flames that were licking across a narrow twisting 2-lane mountain road getting out of Idyllwild while the forestry service trucks were coming up the same road. I have also seen my son evacuate his family from their home in Big Bear but these fires are becoming huge in area! </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Seanachai: My longest paddling was 138 hours... Well, you probably deserved it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Seanachai: My longest paddling was 138 hours... Well, you probably deserved it. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ng cavscout Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Seanachai: My longest paddling was 138 hours... Well, you probably deserved it. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by NG cavscout: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Seanachai: My longest paddling was 138 hours... Well, you probably deserved it. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Nidan1: Where is my turn? To sleep with Janet Reno? The line is short, so it should be coming up pretty soon. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted October 25, 2007 Share Posted October 25, 2007 Taking cheap shots at people like Janet Reno is what little boys do. Little boys who are insecure in their own manhood. I have been to bed with extremely attractive women, attractive women, and women who were lovely in their hearts, under the stars, alone with only their own eyes and mine to see them. I can truthfully say that there wasn't a single one of them who didn't despair of being attractive enough, no matter how beautiful, and that because of involving themselves with men, who are, frankly, fecking pigs. Now, how to say this? I've met several of you, seen pictures of quite a few more, and you lot of drooling halfwits simply aren't in a position to be cutting up about ugly women. It's like watching a cage full of baboons hoot about how there isn't an arse puffy and red enough for them. Let's be frank. You are not the answer to the sighs of maidens. Every single one of you lot of pissants who has a woman should be on your knees, every single fecking night, praising the Goddess and proclaiming her mercy. The rest of you are just lonely geeks who spend evenings arguing with your right hand about who's going to be on top that night. And that includes you, Stuka. Doesn't matter how long you spend in front of the mirror, boyo, you're starting to be more and more like the wicked Queen, tossing a poisoned apple. I bet you've even started plucking your eyebrows, haven't you? It always shows. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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