Jump to content
Special Upgrade 4 Tech Tips

Does your Peng Challenge Thread Tire Too Easily?

Boo Radley
 Share

Recommended Posts

Gaylord Focker Senior Member

Gaylord Focker

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

What's a snarker? I've never even heard of one before. Oh, hey, are snarkers those things that real hunters talk some city-dweller into going out into the woods to catch, then they leave him out there with some silly bag or something and have a good laugh about it ridin' down the dirt road in their Ford?

Can someone please pass me a shovel?
Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • Replies 301
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

imported_Hiram Sedai Senior Member

imported_Hiram Sedai

Posted
Posted

Hirsute Hiram’s Gamey Update

I know you all have been sitting home waiting for this moment to arrive in your lives. To sate your curiosity, I’ve decided to share some quality moments with you. Know that each and every time where I may be losing, it is because my opponent is cheating.

Elvis I hate city fighting. It’s difficult to hear my men dying because of the sounds of the burning buildings and both of my burning vehicles. Meanwhile, he has 20 T-34’s romping through my city killing everything he sees. Oh, what fun.

JDMorse Why do I insist on playing a lawyer? I know that he will bend the rules in some way so that nothing will go my way. It’s my fault for choosing a scenario and the side where I simply cannot win. I wonder if I’ll be able to beat him by the time the next incarnation of Combat Mission comes out. Has he earned my disdain? You betcha!!

Linden Is that his name in the CMBB manual? What was I thinking playing this guy? Everything he has is invulnerable. I use my high school German trying to make him look the other way so I might kill something, but it is all for naught. Don’t hate him yet.

Seanachai I know I’m driving him crazy. He’ll win because I’m not moving forward. He can just sit on the flag and whine. I’ll try my gamey flag rush at the end, but don’t tell him. (it will be our little secret) I pretend to hate him because he likes attention and women stopped paying attention to him since before I was born.

Moriarty My kingdom for bigger stuff and nicer stuff. Santa, I want some big beefy tanks to squash this guy. This one will be like the blind, drunken, leper boxers and we may mistakenly land a blow by the end of the game. Can’t really hate him, he’s like a lecherous uncle who offers you candy. Not that I had that sort of uncle or anything.

Goanna We are still in the first part of the game where I’m not dying yet. I just know that this time I’m going to thump him good. He won’t know what’s happening to him as I pummel his forces and blah blah blah. Who am I kidding? He can just hit “Go” until the end of the game and still get a Major Victory. Don’t really hate him because he gets off on it. I’m saving it. Oh, yes.

Lorak I used to feel sorry for myself until I started playing this guy. We have self deprecating wars in the chatroom. I’ve met my match in self insults. The PBEM will probably be boring and forgettable because I have few skills and he has none. You know I can’t hate him because he is too much like me. (How’s that for an insult?)

Speedbump He has nice buildings and I have burnt out tanks. His gamey use of air assets is difficult to deal with. I still want his liver on a stick. Yes, I abhor him. It’s just natural.

Boo Radley I sent this worm a scenario he is guaranteed to win. Maybe it will help out my karma. I did hate him before but I’m saving it all up for the next opponent.

Am I playing too many people? Yes, I probably am. I take too long to send turns and usually do poorly. Still, something interesting happened to me tonight as I was chatting on AOL instant messenger. Someone challenged me. It was a certain someone that so many of you fawn over and bend over to welcome whenever he visits. I see you scurry about and beg his mercy when you see him. I hate him and tell him every single time I chat with him.

MRPeng I know that he is a fetid chancre sore on the bottom lip of a prepubescent library dweller. He is the nasty stuff you find at the bottom of your vegetable drawer when you leave your food in there too long. I feel sorry for the people that have to view his leathery visage and bloodshot eyes on a daily basis. He has earned my eternal disdain in a way that is almost intimate. His presence has altered my life and not for the better. I was easy to get along with before. I could be pleasant in real life and wasn’t given to use spittle and growling sounds when making a point. I had friends then.

I blame him for each real and perceived inadequacy I have in my life now. As I sit in my doctor’s office and see the look of disappointment on my doctor’s face, I attempt to explain the rage within due to MRPeng’s influence on my life. The doctor is amazed that blood pressure could get that high. He said I should find something that would relax me.

MRPENG I want to feel relaxed and happy. Guess what would make me a happy camper. Go ahead, guess. Well, you can be a participant in this therapy. I’d love nothing more than to drag you out and commence the obligatory bludgeoning and evisceration. I won’t stoop to saying that corny little phrase “die-a lot” when I’m pummeling you. I will be hurling vile epithets and kicking your flabby IT body. Think of your entrails stretched from that stop sign down the street to the old tree on your front lawn. I would adorn it with bows and wreaths for the festive holiday we will all enjoy. I do hope you have the intestinal fortitude. That was a little jokey-joke.

I will make it my top priority to beat you within an inch of your life in our upcoming PBEM. Since I’m such a nice guy, I’ll even email you this text because of your attention deficit disorder and how you think of yourself as too good to check this thread any more.

I’ve saved up every juicy morsel of hatred for you. Let the taste of fear stew in your mouth because I’m coming to spank your middle aged, fetid, unshaven, flaccid butt with all the fury I can muster. You created this monster. Reap the wind.

Edited because hatred does not denote intellect. I can not now nor could I ever acheive the perfection found in either Geier's or Germanboy's posts. In my limited view, they are the same entity seperated by taoistic remnants that are beyond my limited comprehension.

[ November 15, 2002, 01:02 AM: Message edited by: Hiram Sedai ]

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Noba Senior Member

Noba

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Nidan1:

There will never be another ewe!!!

Quick.... how many Aussies does it take to use a shovel????

A damn sight less than Telecommunicators....

Noba.

ps, don't you owe me a turn ? or somefink !

So I missed somefink....

[ November 15, 2002, 08:35 AM: Message edited by: Noba ]

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Nidan1 Senior Member

Nidan1

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Marlow:

He's so drunk that he's not even doing it right. The sheep's back legs are supposed to be inside of the cowboy boots so that the sheep doesn't get away. Or so I've been told by many a Minnesotan.

True enough, but I've heard the practice originally started in the Old Dominion.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Lars Senior Member

Lars

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Marlow:

He's so drunk that he's not even doing it right. The sheep's back legs are supposed to be inside of the cowboy boots so that the sheep doesn't get away. Or so I've been told by many a Minnesotan.

Nah, you're supposed to put the back legs in your waders and then push the critter up to a cliff edge.

Or so I've been told.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Nidan1 Senior Member

Nidan1

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Lars:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Marlow:

He's so drunk that he's not even doing it right. The sheep's back legs are supposed to be inside of the cowboy boots so that the sheep doesn't get away. Or so I've been told by many a Minnesotan.

Nah, you're supposed to put the back legs in your waders and then push the critter up to a cliff edge.

Or so I've been told.</font>

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Speedy Senior Member

Speedy

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Persephone:

SheepDipMace.jpg

Baaaaaaaaah!

Persephone

P.S. Thanks Harv!

When you come home from the pub at 2am that is not something you really want to see.

{edit- Hangon it's OK I just saw the background, just Mace doing his official Victorian government duties setting up the Bourke street malls' nativity scene.}

[ November 15, 2002, 10:24 AM: Message edited by: Speedy ]

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Lars Senior Member

Lars

Posted
Posted
Originally posted by Nidan1:

Lars , do you need to be coated in Border Collie piss, in order to sneak up on the sheep?

Nidan, you just haven't been paying attention again.

***BOOT***

You need something that sheep aren't afraid of.

I suggest trying to find out what Mace uses for aftershave.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...