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Worst looking AFV of the War


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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by The Commissar:

That piece of crap from...uh...was it New Zealand? I forgot the name, but it looked like a large box with tracks. Named after one of their politicians if Im not mistaken. The Churchill is a supermodel compared to that horror!<hr></blockquote>

I agree - the Bob Semple Tank from NZ takes the cake. Imagine a standard Caterpillar-type bulldozer, remove the blade, cover the superstructure in corrugated steel, then add six guys with Brens poking out at all angles (including one pointed straight forward which required the operator to lie on a mattress on top of the engine compartment) and you have the general idea. It was heavy, slow, relatively vulnerable, top-heavy and prone to tip over, and low in firepower. Only four were made before somebody decided that this contraption wasn't worth any further money or resources.

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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I think you'll find.

Personally, I'd have to say perhaps the ugliest tank buit during the war was the AT1 series of amphibious tanks produced by the British.

Second best, would have to go, IMO to the Marmon-Herrington light tank.

Third, perhaps to the various Italian and even perhaps Hungarian SP guns.

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I always thought the M3 Lee looked kinda neat...pointy and dangerous (but not something you'd like to be in when the 88s start flying)

We must remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, however, some things are just really stanky! tongue.gif

My vote goes to the (POS) Japanese medium tank type 89. Pictured below: (note, due to size, and the fact that I don't want to downscale the image and upload it to my archive, I'm just posting a link)

Japanese tank, indian origin. Ugliest of war!

did you click the link? No? Then do so real quick! (unless you have a 56k, then it won't be so quick...)

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Ok, if ya clicked it you found out my bad joke. Thats ACTUALLY the Elite SS Elefantroopen that...pfft. Kidding. Maybe later I'll dig through my links and find a real picture. Until then, think of pretty tanks...

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joseph Porta:

Hey, anyone got some pictures to back up their claims ?

Particularly of that NZ beauty... :D

[ 12-23-2001: Message edited by: Joseph Porta ]<hr></blockquote>

does anyone have a name or military designation for that whacky NZ tank so we can try to look it up on the web??

-tom w

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Sorry to keep posting folks, but the discription/history that went with those photos was just too funny:

"God bless the men in this machine! In 1940 war hysteria gripped New Zealand and an effort was made to produce a home grown tank. It was decided to armor an

International Harvester* farm tractor to make use of equipment on hand. The result was an amazing "tank" called a "Bob Semple" after a politician in New Zealand. Bob

was a popular, colorful, Labor politician (just like an American Democrat - only worse). Backing this wonderful idea (probably because Bob was) were the Prime Minister

and Minister of Defence (who was Bob). Bob must have been impressed by the U.S. Disston "Tractor Tank" and the idea that a tank would actually be named after

himself! Bob probably had visions of Semples storming the beaches and taking Berlin or Tokyo! Rube Goldberg himself could not have designed it better. Apart from

being just plain ugly to the bone, the front gunner actually had to lay on a mattress on top of the engine in order to fire his weapon! The Semple had a searing top speed

of 24 km/h but had to slow down or even stop in order to shift gears. The "tank" was highly unstable in movement and top heavy. The Public Works Department tried to

give this "white elephant" to the army and even offered to convert their entire fleet of 81 into Semples (at a cost of only 4200 pounds sterling apiece)! The army took

them, tested them, and even paraded them around the country in an effort to whip up morale. After the laughter subsided, and in an rare display of military intelligence,

the army returned them (I am sure that they only needed to have knocked on Afganistan's door to find a buyer as Disston did). Only 4 units** were built before public

ridicule stopped the production. The Bob Semple was armed with 4 machine guns, it was 12 feet tall had had a crew of 8 men. 8 men? I can understand 5, but 8? 5 were

probably soldiers, 1 was a shop steward, another fended off the birds trying to roost, and the last took out the trash once a day and waved to the people. There is a

rumor that after the war Bob took a job with Ford and helped to design the Edsel and fuel tanks for the Pinto. He later went to Yugoslavia and influenced the design of

the "Yugo" but this is not confirmed. The reported weight was from 20 to 25 tons. The extreme swing in reported weight may have been design differences between all 4

units** produced or incomplete historical data. The production of this tank was not New Zealand's "finest hour".

*Janes reports that the type of tractor was an International Harvester. The book "Pictorial History Of Tanks Of The World 1915-45 by Peter Chamberlain & Chris Ellis state

that the tractor was an International Harvester. Another source, "New Zealand Yesterdays" by Hamish Keith, printed in 1984 by Readers Digest Australia reports that a

Caterpiller brand Cat DH-8 was used.

** Janes reports that 4 units were produced. Another source, "New Zealand Yesterdays" by Hamish Keith, printed in 1984 by Readers Digest Australia report 3."

Oh, and just for kicks, also from Kiwiland: The Schofield!

schofield_1.jpg

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Being a Kiwi i had know idea we made such things.

Being a nation that could do anything with a piece of number 8 wire,i guess there may have been more to those tanks that met the eye.I reckon they were designed to lure the enemy into a false sense of security,then the corragated iron side's would have droped away revealing a 120mm smoothbore gun,and sloped cobham armour!!!!Yea that was what they were,Wolf dressed in sheeps clothing!!!!!

[ 12-24-2001: Message edited by: Titan ]</p>

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by busboy:

My God! The horror... The horror...

Your Kiwi monstorcity wins hands down!

NZSemple.jpg<hr></blockquote>

In fact the front on shot somehow conjures an image of a Doctor Who UberDalek!!!! :eek: hehe..

The horror indeed!! If I saw one of those thingy's groaning and clanking it's way towards moi waving 8 pairs of assorted arms, metinks I would be routed ASAP!!!!

:D:D:D:D

AJ

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<blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by AussieJeff:

In fact the front on shot somehow conjures an image of a Doctor Who UberDalek!!!! :eek: hehe..

AJ<hr></blockquote>

The provenance of this vehicle is obvious: the A team built it. The base chassis is Mr T's van onto which they've welded some corrugated iron while holed up in a barn. Total build time about 15 minutes I'd say.

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