Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 So, listen up you two pillocks. You have exactly 14 hours to provide me via e-mail list with 1500 pts worth of purchases that you would like me to place for you. If I have not received your purchases by 0700 AEST on 19 March, I will purchase for you. If you can't talk at one another in the meantime and both send me 1500 pts of Frenchies, I will pick. If you screw up your picks, or I can't figure out what you want to buy from your note, I will modify. You have one chance to get things right. All you have to answer is: do you want an angry god, or a happy god? Hmmmm...Hairy Thunderer or Cosmic Muffin? You decide. I just have one question. What is AEST? Australian Eastern Standard Time? How do you measure that? Do you have clocks down there? Let's see, it's 8:25 Am, Monday, here in God's Little Acre, Ohio. That must mean it's 2 AM on St. Swithin's Day down under. Year of our Lord 1845 Anno Domini. I can't tell you what I'd like while I'm here at the office (Mr. Dithers frowns on this sort of thing, don't you know), so I will e-mail you in approx. 10 hours. I realize that it's after your arbitrary 14 hr. deadline, but as I am a solipsist, that deadline started from the moment I saw it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Elvis: Dear Peng, Are you mad, man? You must be. Get the hell out of that town NOW!!! They don't want you there and you don't want to be there. Rent a car and drive to Vegas.....I'll meet you there. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, eh? Let's see, if Elvis is the Duke, that makes Peng the 400lb Samoan attorney. Just make sure that car is a Cadillac convertible, and don't spare the ether. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Riiinnnnggggg ... Riiinnnnggggg Peng, in an ever so groggy and beer besoaked voice: Hu ... hullo? Voice: Mr. ... Mr. Belknap is it? In room 366? Peng: Uh ... yeah, this is Mr. Belknap, what ... my GAWD man it's 3:30 AM what the hell is this? Voice: Awfully sorry Mr. Belknap, this is Henry Schurbohm of Facilities and Maintenance here at the Quality Inn and I'm following up on a report of strange noises from your room that you apparently reported? Peng: Huh? No, no I just go in last night ... what's this all about and why the hell are you calling at 3:30 in the bloody morning? Voice: Now, now Mr. Belknap, no need to get testy, we at the Quality Inn take great pride in following up on customer complaints immediately. I'm looking at the work order right now and it says that someone reported annoying noises coming from room 366. Peng: Well it wasn't me damnit and it's 3:30 in the morning, can I go back to bed now? Voice: Well certainly Mr. Belknap, if there are no noises then it seems we've solved the problem ... odd though ... Peng: What's odd ... aside from this whole stupid state? Voice: The work order was quite specific, it said that there was a horrible noise from the room ... said it went Peng, PENG, PENG all night long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 what noise? just my little lappitytop making splodey sounds an stuff. didn't even have it at maximum volume. Elvis I don't get out of this clean, well mannered, friendly WHITE ('cept for the Utes - looks like they do all the grunt work around here while whitey rakes in the dough - the Man oppressin the locals again) town until saturday. I don't get in to philly until around 10 pm. I will need your couch saturday night and the Bloody Mary Bar at Bridget Foy's sunday morning. fortification for the drive home ya know. I got the lay of the land a bit last night and can begin the ravaging in earnest tonight. If I am a clever fellah I can lay my hands on a hoop ticket and go see the Utah team play whoever for free. Not much of a hoop fan, but if it's for free its for me. crap now I am late for my thing. Why do they start these things so early in the morning? bastards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledge59 Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Peng, PENG, PENG all night longThis is funny? [ March 18, 2002, 10:36 AM: Message edited by: Sledge59 ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Sledge59: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Peng, PENG, PENG all night longThis is funny?</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Sledge59: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Peng, PENG, PENG all night longThis is funny?</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledge59 Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Yes, that was funny. Damn funny.So you must be the target audience for the American sit-com. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Sledge59: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Peng, PENG, PENG all night longThis is funny?</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Sledge59: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Peng, PENG, PENG all night longThis is funny?</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Sledge59: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Yes, that was funny. Damn funny.So you must be the target audience for the American sit-com.</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Croda: Good, sound, analysis, Squire. Now post a sodding report on the progress of your sodding battle at sodding Crodaburg™ before I beat you to death with your own sodding lungs! And a good morning to you too. I'd love nothing more than to wax poetic (or even my legs) on how I am totally decimating my unworthy opponent, the indescreet R_Leete, but in the last exchange, he sent me an e-mail but no attachment. It's understandable though, as he emulates Zippy the Pinhead in his daily activities and is more than likely drunk. But have no concerns, my liege, my lord and all around spiffy type person, ere long, I will regale you with tales of viscious attacks, brilliant defenses, victories snatched from the jaws of defeat...or not, we'll just have to see how it goes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 For those who remember…my niece, Anabella is now a robust 6.1 lbs. She is at home and recovering from a cold. Since her white blood cell count is still a bit screwy, it was kind of scary. She is quite adorable and has impressive projectile vomiting. Her range is considerable. My sister now has to undergo something called a Spectroscopy. I think that’s how you spell it. It seems that there was too much blood still in her skull, so the MRI wasn’t conclusive. The saga continues. I’ve been a bit distracted, so turns will go out when they go out. Complain if you want. [ March 18, 2002, 02:07 PM: Message edited by: Hiram Sedai ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledge59 Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: (Stuff that really does matter) Hiram, Best wishes to you and yours. Sledge Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rleete Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: ...but in the last exchange, he sent me an e-mail but no attachment.Check your email, ya pillock. Your "quality" MSN account wouldn't take the files, and kept returning them to me. Had to split them in two just to get them through. Maybe you could try checking the ol' inbox before spouting off. Nah, too logical to do that, eh? And no bolding for me, you dolt. Sheesh, learn the proper etiquette, or the Just-a-car will be all over you like flies on Croda. In other news, Tank Man has gone MIA, and Seanachai appears to be too busy snuggling up to Aussies to send a file. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by R_Leete: Check your email, ya pillock. Your "quality" MSN account wouldn't take the files, and kept returning them to me. Had to split them in two just to get them through. Maybe you could try checking the ol' inbox before spouting off. Nah, too logical to do that, eh? OK, Rainman, try to keep up with me here, after all I'm trying to be linear. There. was/were no file(s) in the e-mail last evening. I don't know if there are now, I'm not at home, I'm at the orofice. And as for my "quality" MSN account, even though I loathe and despise it almost as much as I do you, chances are the files were deemed unacceptable merely because they originated with you. Have to keep the riff-raff out somehow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rleete Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: ...try to keep up with me here, after all I'm trying to be linear.Linear? Next you'll be numbering posts. Sick 'em, Elvis! Originally posted by Boo_Radley: Have to keep the riff-raff out somehow.No, too easy. Like taking shots at Hiram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by R_Leete: No, too easy. Like taking shots at Hiram Whew! Excellent comeback, sir. What a hit! You really know how to swing that purse of yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rleete Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: I'm not at home, I'm at the orofice.Oh, thank you for that mental image. What you and your leige do, in the privacy of your own tent is your business. Not that there's anything wrong with that... And it ain't a purse, it's a gas mask bag. Really, it is. Honest. Have to be fully prepared for some of the ah, fragrances in here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Sledge59: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Peng, PENG, PENG all night longThis is funny?</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 18, 2002 Share Posted March 18, 2002 And no bolding for me, you dolt. Sheesh, learn the proper etiquette, or the Just-a-car will be all over you like flies on Croda.Hmmm, not bad, not bad at all in fact. One small question if I may. To say that I would be "on" someone like flies on Croda implies, to my mind at least, that there are occassions on which flies are NOT on Croda. If that was your intent, and it may well not have been, I would remind you that there have been no verifiable periods during which flies were NOT on Croda. In fact, underwater video has confirmed that some die hard flies took really deep breaths and submerged with him so as not to lose the really good locations when he slipped on a ... well, a Croda not to put too fine a point on it. I should also note that the bolding and proper spelling of Squires and above is a PERSONAL choice. It's one that I endorse of course and follow scrupulously but it's not a CessPool requirement. However, those who do not show the proper respect for CessPool ranks are, in my humble but correct opinion, not fit to be considered for Serfdom. All in all, keep up the good work lad and good job following the procedures. By Gawd we may make something of some of these SSNs after all. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted March 19, 2002 Share Posted March 19, 2002 Not likely, Mr. Xia. My dubiousnessosity is derived from the fact that neither of the two neophytes I am preparing a soiree for have provided their selections, one of them clearly can’t tell time and is from {shudder}Ohio{/shudder} (which likely explains the inability to tell time). Since the Bard has once again chosen to focus on his last loss to this Australian (loss of employment tends to generate these sorts of spirals into negativity), I could be forced to address his more libellous assertions. However, I will not do so and instead reiterate my offer to him of a thread or so ago to setup a match of his choosing in which I will beat him like my favourite plastic drum of childhood. Now I recognise that his alcohol induced fugue may also leave him bereft of the motivation to generate a scenario of his choosing, so I have sent him a map from the Scenario Depot and a crayon drawing of what do with it. I expect a setup in time for the next ice age. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted March 19, 2002 Share Posted March 19, 2002 Feh! [ March 18, 2002, 05:07 PM: Message edited by: Stuka ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted March 19, 2002 Share Posted March 19, 2002 Originally posted by Sledge59: This is funny? Well, it did show some early promise, but then Joe spoiled it by speaking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted March 19, 2002 Share Posted March 19, 2002 While I more or less follow the MBT tradition as far as bolding goes, and ussually spell names correctly, I prefer to make an exception for you Jo Xia, the esteemed Rent-a-car. Mainly because it annoys you so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts