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Peng Eye For the Challenge Guy: The Grog Makeovers


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Originally posted by Marlow:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Herr Oberst:

Oh this could be just the thing to get me out of retirement... send me that map, so that I might put vile units upon it, all the better to watch Boo and Wildman writhe and thrash and gnash teeth like Gollum with an Elven rope about his neck...

On the way, enjoy. </font>
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Originally posted by Herr Oberst:

Let the festivities begin!

Cry havoc, and let loose the hund-minen of war... or sumfink like that.

You obnoxious bastard! You owe me a real game. And not just another 'I won't send the last turn showing my very minor defeat because I'm too drunk to remember how email works' type game!

Although Reggie, Biff, and Llewellyn still speak fondly of how fecking, sodding badly you were losing the last CMBO game we played that you failed to send the final files from; but all is forgiven, given that you ended up in Treatment (we can only assume).

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Why are there so many shiftless, witless and generally gormless pillocks that can't spell dalem correctly?

Now I know you're not trying to get up his nose by spelling his damned name WRONG. It's because you are one of the clueless morons who really don't have a clue. A lot like Boo* in fact.

Anyway, some updates.

The above mention Boo is namby-pambying his way around the map in which he has his Russian hordes attacking on three sides. The pillock still won't win. It will take more than the overwhelming numbers of troops AND the afore-mentioned three sides attack to let you win, bucko. You will make a defeat out of a silk purse, i'm sure.

Elvis has found out that UBER tanks in the form of 5 King tigers is a vey bad swap for TWO, read it <font size=+2> TWO </font size> T34/85's. My brilliant use of covered arcs and insightfull tactical prowess has shown him the error of smug incontinence. Oh, we could mention the fog and ranges of 180 metres, but HE already knows all about that. (We will now disappear into that loverly fog to emerge suddenly and kill more huge clankety things of his)

Meanwhile, the Evil loose lipped Leeo has suffered a MAJOR DEFEAT in a computer picked battle as Uber Finn ! (That's TWO Uber commanders on their knees).

My brilliant use of conscripts and insightfull tactical prowess has shown him also the error of smug incontinence.

Noba.

* I know, there are many more. No need to post the bleedin' obvious.

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Originally posted by Noba:

Meanwhile, the Evil loose lipped Leeo has suffered a MAJOR DEFEAT in a computer picked battle as Uber Finn ! (That's TWO Uber commanders on their knees).

My {snip} insightfull tactical prowess has shown him also the error of smug incontinence.

Noba.

Noba-dee knows da trouble I've seen,

Noba-dee knows da sorrow...

Are you quite sure that incontinence is the word you meant to use??? Is it that you, die uber-Noba, know more than Leeeeoooooo about the wearing of Depends. Must make you feel all warm and fuzzy on the, er, outside... Just the thing to let you concentrate during that crucial last disc in the shuffleboard tournament. You must be quite a sight in your shorts, black socks and tennis shoes.

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Originally posted by PondScum:

I'm currently in The Land Of Many Lakes, Most Of Which Are Currently Awash With Hunters, which means I'm hiding from Lars, dalem, Seanachai et al (not very hard, especially if Lars is driving)

Time to get the shotgun out, it's HUNTING SEASON!!!

dalem, get the dog, Seanachai, get the booze.

We got some Pondscum killing to do...

{And if you'd ever seen me shoot ducks, you'd know I do very well on pondscum, cursed little feathered bastiches...}

SSN Hint Of The Day: Have belching contests in restaurants.

Now sod off.

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Originally posted by Seanachai:

Dalem, you un-burst bag of urine. You tent-caterpillar on the stem of life's bough. You telecomm employed pustulant boil on humanity's pock-marked bum.

Send me, dear Dalem, a setup. Nothing in snow. We're too near to snow.

Awww Seanachai, that's so cute. I feel warmed in the blast of your ire much as a good sauce pan is warmed by a high heat oven but not really affected. Know that I loathe you right back in all sorts of crinkly lovely bits as well also too.

A setup it will be. For you, I'll send a setup.

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Originally posted by Noba:

Meanwhile, the Evil loose lipped Leeo has suffered a MAJOR DEFEAT in a computer picked battle as Uber Finn ! (That's TWO Uber commanders on their knees).

My brilliant use of conscripts and insightfull tactical prowess has shown him also the error of smug incontinence.

It would be very small of me to mention that the Uber Finns under my command were issued naught but toothpicks, with broomhandle support, against Noba's masses of T-34's, Valentines, KV-1 flamethrowers (2) and M17's (2).

Our next bout will again be a completely random QB with computer picked forces.

If I throw the dice enough times, I may eventually be given something more effective than fingernail clippers with which to thrash that Aussie naked mole rat known as Noba.

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Roight! Off across the big pond to see clankety things and shooty things and various 'splody things up close and personal. Probably get to see some English and Scottish versions of pointy sticks, too. Let me revel in the fact that none of you nongs (except for Andreas, who is the king of nongdom) will be there. Luckily, Soddball has left the island, so I may make light of his questionable parentage behind his back.

Rest assured, I will do my very best to further UK-USA relations, by explaining that Monty was a gamey bastard, and that Chruchill was simply a windbag (although he was a drunken windbag, so he does get extra points for that). I will also discredit the Spitfire vs. the ME-109. Lastly, I will make disparaging remarks concerning the Royals. Ought to make for some interesting disscusions, eh wot?

While in the Tower of London, I shall imagine dalem and Seanachai in the assorted torture devices on disply. I shall be saddened by the reality that they are not actually in said devices. However, I shall take comfort in great quantities of English stouts and porters.

Hopefully, the two weeks without internet access will give my mind a chance to regain some measure of sanity. It will also give all of you losers a free shot at me, with no chance of rebuttal. Use your time wisely. Oh hell. With you lot, wise is a term best left unsaid.

You may proceed to seeth with envy and rage at my fortune.

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Originally posted by Noba:

The above mention Boo is namby-pambying his way around the map in which he has his Russian hordes attacking on three sides. The pillock still won't win. It will take more than the overwhelming numbers of troops AND the afore-mentioned three sides attack to let you win, bucko. You will make a defeat out of a silk purse, i'm sure.

Noba.

Well, anything is possible, much like the accidental combination of defective genes that produced you, but I don't see HOW I can lose with the unbelievably moronic way you've been commanding your troops, with what can only be described as a gold paint chuffing style of elan.

Why did you suddenly drive your Marder across an open field in front of my FOUR tanks, again?

My impression of Noba:

"Rommel, you magnificent bastard, I tried to read your book, but there were no pictures to color and now I'm sad!"

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Damn you Seanachai, I wanted some BONE SAWS damnit! I wanted to see blood and ooze and mucus and hear the screams of agony as we "Made Over" Grog Dorosh. I wanted to assure him that it would all be worth the pain since chicks dig scars and boy HOWDY was he gonna have some scars. I wanted to point out that women love to baby the misfortunates who have one leg that's three inches shorter than the other ... they don't take them home to bed of course but given that it's Grog Dorosh there's NO NET LOSS!

I wanted all that Seanachai ... I GOT behavior advice from a cross between Martha Stewart and Dr. Phil!

AND I'm in Denver ... I'm just a bit cross so I am.

Joe

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Originally posted by MrSpkr:

From the "tell us something we didn't know already, Sparky!" category, we have young dalem, who said:

"I have the smallest radii around."

This explains your fascination with guns, methinks. You are, umm, compensating, right?

Steve

Barely. That's the sad part.
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Originally posted by Seanachai:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Herr Oberst:

Let the festivities begin!

Cry havoc, and let loose the hund-minen of war... or sumfink like that.

You obnoxious bastard! You owe me a real game. And not just another 'I won't send the last turn showing my very minor defeat because I'm too drunk to remember how email works' type game!

Although Reggie, Biff, and Llewellyn still speak fondly of how fecking, sodding badly you were losing the last CMBO game we played that you failed to send the final files from; but all is forgiven, given that you ended up in Treatment (we can only assume). </font>

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Dear Noncarers,

Noba is correct. He executed one of the more amazing tank moves I have ever seen. Unfortunately for him the element of surprise is gone and the rest of the battle will be mine to determine.

Hiram, he wished.

Ms. Sedai, too slow of turn around time for me to remember.

Leeo, nasty nasty ugly Peng looking battle that he is soon to die in.

Berli, in our 2nd battle of our operation he finally chewed up my initial forward units and seems to be under the impression that he is cutting right through my forces...this is exactly what I want him believe.

Andreas, another operation where I have outflanked him so badly and my troops are so deep that I think he believes they are his.

Peng, brutal little piece of evil that Berli created. Horrid operation (that's right I have 3 operations going at the same time). Trenches, trees, darkness and certain death for our weak chinned friend Peng.

Love,

Elvis

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Originally posted by Mouse:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Noba:

Meanwhile, the Evil loose lipped Leeo has suffered a MAJOR DEFEAT in a computer picked battle as Uber Finn ! (That's TWO Uber commanders on their knees).

My {snip} insightfull tactical prowess has shown him also the error of smug incontinence.

Noba.

Noba-dee knows da trouble I've seen,

Noba-dee knows da sorrow...

Are you quite sure that incontinence is the word you meant to use??? Is it that you, die uber-Noba, know more than Leeeeoooooo about the wearing of Depends. Must make you feel all warm and fuzzy on the, er, outside... Just the thing to let you concentrate during that crucial last disc in the shuffleboard tournament. You must be quite a sight in your shorts, black socks and tennis shoes. </font>

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Originally posted by Noba:

Boo will soon be here posting about how HE went booringly through all the permutations of Noba LAST YEAR !

Noba.

Well, with gathering seeds before the fall and all, I haven't time to read every post off the old threads, but I have checked up on a bunch of them.

My favorite quote, though it grates against my ears to say so, probably comes from the Bard *shudder* something like:

"If the best of the world is you lot, I vote for nuclear war and a chance for the cockroaches to strut their stuff."

Almost worth a "Best CMBO/CMBB sayings" t-shirt...

In fact, for the MBT in general, what is your favorite saying that you've heard in any of the incarnations? Oh, and don't nominate something you yourself said. It just plain looks bad...

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