Berlichtingen Posted November 27, 2001 Share Posted November 27, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by bauhaus: Do you really think we'd stoop so low to allow an Aussie to be made into food for human consumption? How dare you!<hr></blockquote> Who said anything about 'human consumption'? We might have fed him to you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Oberst Posted November 27, 2001 Author Share Posted November 27, 2001 Oooo! Oooo! New thread time! Pick me!!! Pick me!!! A better title I have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agua Perdido Posted November 27, 2001 Share Posted November 27, 2001 I tell you, I'm fighting some real gamey bastards right now. Feckers bought termites AND powder-post beetles in the same scenario! I think they've even got the Ausf. H beetles with the HVSS thorax articulation and tungsten mandibles, which never made it past the prototype stage before the 101st Terminex Division airdropped on the Wolf's Lair and made a field-expendient fumigation tent with their parachutes. BTS, FIX IT OR DO SOMEFINK! Of course, the average wood-destroying pest (gamey bastard though he be) creates far more societal benefit than your average Cesspooler, and is both a better dinner companion (mmm... crunchy!) and a better CM player. At least the cockroaches seem to have subsided for now. Speaking of insects, time for UPDATES! Pick your damned jaws up off the ground. (And consider getting a new orthodontist.) I do play CM from time to time. Why, I bet I've played nearly a turn in all my games in the last month. jdmorse and stevetherat are game-delaying bastards. Where the feck are my turns? Copying my sitzkreig tactics, eh? Hoping I'll forget my plans? Well, it won't work--I never make any. I vaguely recall that the lawyertruppen are 'sploding real good, but shooting my hapless Canadians (apologies for the redundancy, there) even better. Speaking of Canadians, I'm enjoying a nice nature walk in my attack on Seanachai. So far, my legion of boy scouts have identified different kinds of berries and moss and several kinds of exploding squirrels. There are rumors of renegade forest rangers, but we won't let that interrupt the merit badges. Remember: "Leaves of 3 ain't good TP." Speaking of embarassing itches, Lars and I are rushing for the flags as fast as gamily possible. I hate MEs (but not as much as I hate Lars, the worthless pillock). Speaking of worthless pillocks, Joe Shaw is stumbling through the bocage with his gamey uber-woodsmen, evidently determined to starve my defenders into submission rather than attack. Gad, another 27 turns of this torture... Speaking of torture, Agua Perdido Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goanna Posted November 27, 2001 Share Posted November 27, 2001 Hmmm, well now. Here it is my name mentioned. Who’s this Hanns then, astonishingly high member number and all, I think I’ll just check his profile. Holy POD testicles! It’s another square head from the frozen wastelands. I have no idea what he is on about, but it is making me strangely thirsty. Perhaps this is what the Minnehoovians have been reduced to since the Bard skulked off to become a capitalist shill. Frankly if the lot of them had the sense of pond scum they’d evacuate the entire pot-holed mosquito breeding factory in October each year as I have just done. Enjoy the whiteout ya knob ends. See you in the spring. Oh and what’s this. Moriarty as a second to chrisl. Now there’s a pair of feckin bookends if I’ve ever seen a pair. I sure hope someone is videotaping this match as I haven’t had a s much comic relief since I stopped volunteering weekends at the group home. And what’s up with taking advice on anything other than chewing tabbacy from Slappy? For fecks sake he’s a part time deputy sheriff from South Carolina. The theme from Deliverance comes up every time he posts on my computer. Besides that he’s a nancy that wears mittens. Why doesn’t he just have one of the Minnehoovians or Canadonians show him how to put the string through his coat so his girl won’t have to hold them? Finally, just to refresh the record for the denizens of deep southern Wisconsin who have the attention spans of mayflies on Thai-stick, my foray there resulted in the serious counting of coup for the Scaly One and much forlock pulling, toe scraping and lamenting on the part of all of the residents in the vicinity. That should just about do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Goanna: Oh and what’s this. Moriarty as a second to chrisl. Now there’s a pair of feckin bookends if I’ve ever seen a pair. I sure hope someone is videotaping this match as I haven’t had a s much comic relief since I stopped volunteering weekends at the group home. snip Finally, just to refresh the record for the denizens of deep southern Wisconsin who have the attention spans of mayflies on Thai-stick, my foray there resulted in the serious counting of coup for the Scaly One and much forlock pulling, toe scraping and lamenting on the part of all of the residents in the vicinity. <hr></blockquote> Regarding the first quote, let us be quite clear on the order of thingies here. MrPeng and Chrisl are the combatants. Joe Shaw and I are merely creating a boatload of misery, er, um, selecting the forces, yeah, that's the ticket, for the aforementioned Kaniggets. Regarding the second, you were in deep southern Wisconsin and didn't stop by for a frosty? For shame, Future Boots, for shame. [ 11-27-2001: Message edited by: Moriarty ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Should we treat this Andreas chap as an SSN? <hr></blockquote> Not only as an SSN, but a gamey SSN. How else can the creation of a new handle without the loss of member status, member number or number of posts be explained hmmm? 'Something is rotten in the state of Denmark' Lord high Justicarat, an inquisition is called for. Pray set the wheels of justice in motion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stuka: Not only as an SSN, but a gamey SSN. How else can the creation of a new handle without the loss of member status, member number or number of posts be explained hmmm? 'Something is rotten in the state of Denmark' Lord high Justicarat, an inquisition is called for. Pray set the wheels of justice in motion.<hr></blockquote>Damn good catch Stuka remind me not to kill ALL your Tigers in our game. These are serious charges fellow CessPudlians, if the man can hack into the BTS forum there's no telling what he can do to PBEM files now is there? I think this explains a LOT. Now if we can just rouse the Olde Ones from their drunken stupor perhaps we can get a ruling on this investigation of Andreas (not guilty until proven ... ah to hell with it) this investigation of Undress. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stalin's Organ Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Ah...the sweet sound of methane bubbling out of the fetid waters hasn't changed much at all in my absence...and why would I expect it to?? Well I didn't...so I'm not surprised. did ya all miss me? No - great! I'd hate to think that I'd actually been noticable by my absence. However I am running out of decent opponents - that is anyone ehat will give a bit of lip and not roll over to have his/her tummy tickled!! Where's those namby pamby Orztraylyan drongos - Dive bummer and Fly-spray. Jeez u guys must've had it hard lately - what with the Wallabies & Kanga's losing to the Poms, the Wallabies to the french (we commiserate!), the soccer and the vaunted Aussie pace attack not able to bowl out the Kiwi cricketers twicein a session - how about it guys - u wanna come see if'n as how u can regain a bit of pride & honour...wel no so much regain, but let's not be picky! I'm quiet partial to playing PBEM operations these days - saves having to muck about finding oponents, although I suspect it's not much fun for this boring lot 'cos yo don't get to put as many ticks or crosses by your score card! Edited 'cos while absence may make the heart grow fonder it doesn't improve spelling [ 11-27-2001: Message edited by: Stalin's Organ ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leeo Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Now if we can just rouse the Olde Ones from their drunken stupor perhaps we can get a ruling on this investigation ... <hr></blockquote> An investigation? An investigation? <big>A BLOODY INVESTIGATION?</big> I like it. However, I believe we will need STENOGRAPHERS to handle this inquiry properly. We're not talking about your "prudishly swaddled in wool" stenographers, OH no, we're talkin' about your basic "scantily clad in silken lace, and 'may I be of assistance, Guv'nor'" <big>Stenographers</big>! I can hardly wait. I have this vague feeling of indecisiveness about the verdict, however... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Oberst Posted November 28, 2001 Author Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Stalin's Organ: Ah...the sweet sound of methane bubbling out of the fetid waters hasn't changed much at all in my absence...and why would I expect it to?? [ 11-27-2001: Message edited by: Stalin's Organ ]<hr></blockquote> Well me boy-o, the only things that changed in your absence were that the bubbles became much less frequent, and the odor a whole lot less noisome. Now that you're back, well, let's just say that even the old timers are reaching for their gas masks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Leeo: An investigation? An investigation? <big>A BLOODY INVESTIGATION?</big> I like it. However, I believe we will need STENOGRAPHERS to handle this inquiry properly. We're not talking about your "prudishly swaddled in wool" stenographers, OH no, we're talkin' about your basic "scantily clad in silken lace, and 'may I be of assistance, Guv'nor'" <big>Stenographers</big>! I can hardly wait. I have this vague feeling of indecisiveness about the verdict, however...<hr></blockquote>Yes, I envision a SHORT investigation followed by a LENGTHY Grand Jury empanelment followed by an even lengthier trial after ... I mean IF, of course IF, the Grand Jury should indict. Lengthy trials WOULD, in my humble but correct opinion, require Stenographers in order to have a clear record and to enable the jurors to pay attention to the procedings without being distracted by taking notes. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stalin's Organ Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Don't be silly Her Bubble-burst - we all know that the decay and stench has been around here a lot longer than me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Leeo: An investigation? An investigation? <big>A BLOODY INVESTIGATION?</big> I like it. However, I believe we will need STENOGRAPHERS to handle this inquiry properly. We're not talking about your "prudishly swaddled in wool" stenographers, OH no, we're talkin' about your basic "scantily clad in silken lace, and 'may I be of assistance, Guv'nor'" <big>Stenographers</big>! I can hardly wait. I have this vague feeling of indecisiveness about the verdict, however...<hr></blockquote> I am sorry, but the idea of OGSF and Berli "scantily clad in silken lace, and 'may I be of assistance, Guv'nor" basically puts me off my breakfast almost as much as the sight of Mace playing peg boy with a Bren Tripod would, possibly as much as the thought of Hakk being given a sponge bath by his sex idol, Senator Clinton: I think Andreas should be given a sham trial and reinducted after he pays his dues and a suitable bribe to select members of the pool. Oh, and Goanna, when you get brave enough to come down here, I will arrange for you to ride in a real police car. Last week we broke up another fight at this bar, third time, and I am sure having you as back up would be an interesting experience. Talk about Deliverence, these guys miss that by about 18 teeth a shave and 12 baths. Spraying them with pepper spray just makes them think you hit them with cologne. [ 11-27-2001: Message edited by: Slapdragon ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>I am sorry, but the idea of OGSF and Berli "scantily clad in silken lace, and 'may I be of assistance, Guv'nor"... <hr></blockquote>Slapdragon you idiot! Say ... that looks, well it just looks RIGHT doesn't it lads. Slapdragon you idiot, kinda like macaroni and cheese, Abbot and Costello, Tracy and Hepburn, by George I think I'm onto something with that. Where was I? Oh yeah, Slapdragon you idiot, ... damn that looks GOOD ... right, right, sorry, anyway if you had even a CLUE of the history of the CessPool you'd know that I gained a conviction in the Trial of Seanachai (for heresy no less) through the clever tactic of providing scantily clad stenographers to the jury ... who, by sheer coincidence, were all members of the CessPool. Pay attention damn it. Slapdragon you idiot! Gawd I'm a genius. Joe {edited to annoy Undress and change reference from ying and yang to Tracy and Hepburn because ... just because} [ 11-27-2001: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 If we are going to have a trial, then I should be an investigator. Look at this picture of Ethan I found. [ 11-27-2001: Message edited by: Slapdragon ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Ya know, (just musing here) I used to watch those Abbott and Costello movies they showed on Saturday afternoons when I was a kid. They were hilarious. Anyhow, for so many years, in fact until last week, I always thought Abbott was the short one and Costello the long one. After all, Costello is such a l-o-n-g name, and Bud Abbott, that just seems short. Anyhow, last week a co-worker (real nut this guy) tells me that Costello was the short guy -- after all it IS an Italian name, and he sure looks Italian. I couldn't believe it, I mean I GREW UP with these two, but in short work he proved it (I think it was an Amazon review -- something along the lines of "Who could ever forget Lou Costello's loveable line "I've been a B-A-A-A-D boy" "or somesuch) So, to cut to the chase, I have been in a sort of shock since the discovery that Bud was the tall one and Lou the fat one -it's like my whole childhood was a lie, ya know? ...just got me thinking, that's all... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: Ya know, (just musing here) I used to watch those Abbott and Costello movies they showed on Saturday afternoons when I was a kid. They were hilarious. Anyhow, for so many years, in fact until last week, I always thought Abbott was the short one and Costello the long one. After all, Costello is such a l-o-n-g name, and Bud Abbott, that just seems short. Anyhow, last week a co-worker (real nut this guy) tells me that Costello was the short guy -- after all it IS an Italian name, and he sure looks Italian. I couldn't believe it, I mean I GREW UP with these two, but in short work he proved it (I think it was an Amazon review -- something along the lines of "Who could ever forget Lou Costello's loveable line "I've been a B-A-A-A-D boy" "or somesuch) So, to cut to the chase, I have been in a sort of shock since the discovery that Bud was the tall one and Lou the fat one -it's like my whole childhood was a lie, ya know? ...just got me thinking, that's all...<hr></blockquote> Now this will blow your mind. Abbott was the brains of the two, and was more aggressive, Costello was considered somewhat bashful off set, and did not get along well with people. Bud Abbot was a boxing Champion before he went into comedy, and could lift the back end of a (small) Ford, do one handed push ups, and hold stage crew above his head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Slapdragon: I think Andreas should be given a sham trial and reinducted after he pays his dues and a suitable bribe to select members of the pool. <hr></blockquote> You may be onto something here. I see the newbie 'Andreas' does list one of his interests as the 'Muthabeautiful thread' so yes, I am all for the sham trial following the large bribe idea. Unless of course tradition forbids it. In which case I'll just take the bribe............oh, and a stenographer too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Panzer Leader: ...just got me thinking, that's all...<hr></blockquote> Is this an Oxymoron, or just the standard sort of moron? Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Right, I need two play-testers for a rather complex scenario. Which should rule out about 99% of you for playing it. But hey, I am feeling generous. It is largish, so don't come awhinging if your crappy modems or systems can't hack the files. You should have a decent skill level at playing CMBO, so that should rule out, oh well, maybe I just go ask on the Outerboards... Inquiries per email as in my profile. I reserve the right to abuse you for stupid moves, and blame any losses on your incompetence as players, and will not accept any blame as the designer. Who would have thought I have to thank Stuka one day, but thanks for alerting me to the oversight in my profile. Now corrected. What you lot treat me as is about as relevant as your taunts. I.e. not very. Welcome back Goanna. The Anglophile Nick Chameleon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Mace: Is this an Oxymoron, or just the standard sort of moron? Mace<hr></blockquote> Is that something Australians put on pimples? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Silly teenager! You don't put anything on pimples, you just squeeze them. Then, when they get all infested and turn into boils, you simply squeeze them again. How else do you think you get that attractive 'cratering' effect? Sheesh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Andreas: Who would have thought I have to thank Stuka one day <hr></blockquote> What is this!? Moi, a Seniour Kniggett, UNBOLDED? Joe Shaw, I bring before the court a secondary charge! Lets call it....oh, I don't know, 'lack of SSN respect for their Uber-Kniggetts'....or sumfink. Andreas, best you exercise your right to remain silent, coz you sure ain't making things any easier on yerself. Kids these days eh? gad zooks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Err, all this writing names in bold, is that not just some sort of mental Peng-Thread masturbation/ego-stroking for the witless wastes of space who are currently populating the wastelands of humour and inspiration that this thread has become? Something like 'uh, Joe mentioned my name in bold, I must be important...' Well, I guess it has some merit, because it allows you to discard 99.9% of the drivel written here. No need to answer that question by the way, it was a rethorical question. If you don't understand what that is (make that 'since'), best look it up in a dictionary. You know, these books with words in them, explaining other words. You lot should try it one day, you might just learn something new. The Anglophile Nick Chameleon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted November 28, 2001 Share Posted November 28, 2001 Hey Andreas, can I play your game? Here's my resume: 1.) Gotta big brain (been called supra-genius) 2.)Able captain of men (compared to Napoleon AND Patton) 3.) Some say I helped INVENT Combat Mission, but I deny it. Just find me a capable opponent, hopefully a landed kaniggett, and perhaps your little creation can spark a real cock-fight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts