The Peng Challenge: Thread Blunder

[Joe Shaw]

You mean the one pummeling your men mercilessly as they huddle in terror?

Meanwhile the ssn Voyeur is slowly learning his lesson. My men watched as he carelessly placed a Stug in plain view unattended for turn after turn. Let us go get her my men cried, but I cautioned them it was likely a trap. Finally they cried, death was preferable to this boredom, they would rather go down as men than continue to be taunted thus. And so I loosed my brave ferocious warriors. Deep into enemy territory they ventured waiting to be ambushed at any second. Finally they came upon their prize, and once again voyeur was flaunting an enticing flank. This time however it was not an easily rattled youngster, but an older more experienced man. Master of his Domain! He slowly, carefully and lovingly extended and sighted his long... bazooka. Voyeur had mistaken my troops of having that same predilection, but no these are not men content to watch. They cry for action, to be loosed upon their quarry. A prize to bring back to the Shavian Hall to show those who would stroll into the cesspool and issue their challenge. Shavian House is not to be trifled with. If you are looking for an easy victory go pick on Boo or Nidan1. If not a victory at least they appear easy.

Well they would claim that they are neither cheap nor easy ... But at a minimum they are eminently affordable and user friendly. But don't leave us in suspense lad, what was the fate of that Stug at the ... Uh ... hands of the Masters of their Domain.

Your Liege,

Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT

[sburke]

Well they would claim that they are neither cheap nor easy ... But at a minimum they are eminently affordable and user friendly. But don't leave us in suspense lad, what was the fate of that Stug at the ... Uh ... hands of the Masters of their Domain.

Your Liege,

Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT

Well I'd have killed it, but what was left of the crew bailed in terror first. Would an intact StuG make a better prize or shall I kill it my Liege?

[Joe Shaw]

Well I'd have killed it, but what was left of the crew bailed in terror first. Would an intact StuG make a better prize or shall I kill it my Liege?

While it would be nice to have the head mounted I'm not sure where we'd put it and the Good Lady Linda would probably complain that it doesn't go with the drapes. Just kill it I think.

In other news, NG Cavscout was so unnerved by my brilliant setup and first turn that he has yet to respond ... Not that I blame him.

Your Liege,

Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT

[Stuka]

I recall that OFJ's assertion to my correctness was in respect to a disparaging remark made about Emrys...by nature all disparaging remarks about Michael are correct . Hence there was in fact no requirement for Joe Xhia to say anything at all, but you know how verbose these post padders are.

[sburke]

I recall that OFJ's assertion to my correctness was in respect to a disparaging remark made about Emrys...by nature all disparaging remarks about Michael are correct . Hence there was in fact no requirement for Joe Xhia to say anything at all, but you know how verbose these post padders are.

Ahh I see, so he gave you the benefit of the doubt for finally getting something right. Well case closed I can leave the Shavian House Hall of Archives now content in the knowledge I will find nothing further here to suggest Stuka is, was or will be correct about anything else.

Did you enjoy your minion? I am afraid we are all out so if you want some more we may have to send you Emrys.

[sburke]

While it would be nice to have the head mounted I'm not sure where we'd put it and the Good Lady Linda would probably complain that it doesn't go with the drapes. Just kill it I think.

In other news, NG Cavscout was so unnerved by my brilliant setup and first turn that he has yet to respond ... Not that I blame him.

Your Liege,

Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT

Roger that, Oh and good news, he is sending another prize my way post haste. Very accommodating of him. Maybe we can set up the pair out toward the entry gate for the Limo to drive by.

[Stuka]

I believe I will require a new minion...that one, sweet as it was is now...broken.

[sburke]

I believe I will require a new minion...that one, sweet as it was is now...broken.

We'll send up Emrys. He's not very sweet, in fact I understand he leaves a very sour taste, but we'll ladle him up with syrup and see if that can cover the deficiencies.

[Yeknodathon]

Sweet as rolled in a cow pat

[Joe Shaw]

... {snipped because, like virtually all of his posts, it made no sense whatsoever} ...

From Wikipedia, the OFFICIAL Reference Work of the Peng Challenge Thread:

"The Scunthorpe problem is the blocking of e-mails, forum posts or search results by a spam filter or search engine because their text contains a string of letters that are shared with an obscene word."

Well apparently the filter isn't working properly here damnit.

Joe

[ng cavscout]

This lad Watcher shows some promise. Hard not to shine when compared to the dregs favored by the Shaving House, but still, not bad considering.

Go get 'em lad, smite the dogs.

I request rights of first refusal on this lowly SSN. I propose Watcher as Serf. If he does well in this battle and posts some excellent AAR' s we shall consider him for Squire in the House of Rune.

[sburke]

This lad Watcher shows some promise. Hard not to shine when compared to the dregs favored by the Shaving House, but still, not bad considering.

Go get 'em lad, smite the dogs.

I request rights of first refusal on this lowly SSN. I propose Watcher as Serf. If he does well in this battle and posts some excellent AAR' s we shall consider him for Squire in the House of Rune.

Excellent! Obviously your standards are pretty low, perhaps by now you have replied in turn to my Liege Joe Shaw Knight Champion of the M.B.T., Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread, Creator of the Peng Challenge Thread Podcast, CessPool Drain Commissioner and Founder of the Shavian House

The easier route is simply to sign up folks of a higher caliber, easily found. Our Voyeur has shown himself to be more than prompt at replying, so his acceptance (assuming he is fool enough to join such a "house") would immediately raise the standards there. A rain shower would improve things over there more, but we work with what we have.

[Boo Radley]

Shavian House is not to be bothered with.

Fixed that for ya, lad.

[Joe Shaw]

Really? Washer for Serf to the CessPool? My you ARE desperate aren't you.

But fine, rules are rules as I always say ... well, not always, sometimes I say "Bartender, another beer here." I say that a lot actually.

Where was I ... oh yeah {sigh} ...

By the powers vested in me by the Olde Ones of the Peng Challenge Thread I hereby acknowledge that the SSN known as Watcher is now and shall be considered to be a Serf of the CessPool as a Hole and shall be accorded all the rights and privileges thereunto accorded to the same ... which, when you come right down to it, pretty much means toting the Pissbucket for the use of his betters.

And yes, yes NG Cavscout, you have rights of First Refusal should ebola suddenly mutate into the greatest diet regime ever while simultaneously clearing up everyone's acne ... or if Watcher (spelt but not bolded) should somehow manage to pull the wool over EVERYONE'S eyes and be worthy of promotion to Squire ... I consider the likelihood of that somewhat less than the above suggestion.

So let it be written, let it be done.

Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT.

[Stuka]

sometimes I say "Bartender, another beer here." I say that a lot actually.

All lies. Rumour on the street has it that one Miller Lite and you have your pants on your head singing Kumbaya.

Mind, the pants on the head could be a constant state prior to the beer but who am I to quibble.

[ng cavscout]

All lies. Rumour on the street has it that one Miller Lite and you have your pants on your head singing Kumbaya.

Mind, the pants on the head could be a constant state prior to the beer but who am I to quibble.

Untrue. Joe Shaw is a Zima kind of guy.

[Michael Emrys]

He dips snuff, you know.

Michael

[sburke]

He dips snuff, you know.

Michael

So does Stuka, only he dips it in the pissbucket.

[Watcher]

Real life issues have popped up unexpectedly and will post as soon as time avails itself

[sburke]

Real life issues have popped up unexpectedly and will post as soon as time avails itself

Wait, you have a real life? My Liege does that disqualify one for the position of squire?

[Joe Shaw]

Wait, you have a real life? My Liege does that disqualify one for the position of squire?

It should but sadly that's never been written down ... we'll have to add that to the next iteration of the rules.

Good thinking though, ANYTHING we can do to keep Watcher (spelt but not bolded) out of here would be a good thing ... not to mention having another member of the House of Rune.

Your Liege,

Joe Shaw JFLPCT

[Michael Emrys]

I expect that Watcher might go a long way towards rehabilitating House Rune, which with its sagging shingles, peeling paint, and even broken windows patched with scraps of cardboard, is badly in need of some rehab. And don't even get me started on the weeds growing in the cracks of the sidewalk.

Michael

[Watcher]

I have actually been spending my time in the Shavian House Hall of Archives.

It was fortunate that you remembered the spiffy passcode to get in when asked by the guard at the door and responded correctly “the refrigerator door is open and the piggy sees the cake”

Now go get your shine box.

[Watcher]

Where was I ... oh yeah {sigh} ... .

In the state of confusion where you always are.

By the powers vested in me by the Olde Ones of the Peng Challenge Thread I hereby acknowledge that the SSN known as Watcher is now and shall be considered to be a Serf of the CessPool as a Hole and shall be accorded all the rights and privileges thereunto accorded to the same ... which, when you come right down to it, pretty much means toting the Pissbucket for the use of his betters.

Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT.

Having attended to a higher priority in life which transcended associating with you gits (attended the garage door opening of a neighbor) I am now back to wasting my time here.

Having looked for the Pissbucket, it has been revealed to me by one of the hobgoblins that inhabit this Hole that it was last seen atop of sburke’s head. It appears after being proposed for squire by Justicow Joe Shaw he was seen skipping off with bird like flapping of arms towards the exit while screaming “I have a friend, I finally have a friend” (NOOOO………….. actually you don’t and never will.)

sburke return the Pissbucket it at once, it is not a trophy. The only certificates your laughable existence will ever achieve are the ones for birth and death.

Upon the return of the Pissbucket I have taken the wise decision of having a urinal cake manufactured into a replica of the Shavian House Coat of Arms which will be placed in bottom of said bucket. I have no doubt with such an inducement you trogs will then aim past your shoes. Your parents are going to thank me.

[Watcher]

Wait, you have a real life? My Liege does that disqualify one for the position of squire?

It should be obvious to anyone with the cognitive thinking capabilities above a dung beetle that if a real life was the criteria for disqualification, I shall be ejected post haste and you for one, will never have to worry about it. You’re good to go. This also explains why you asked.

In my super human attempt to ward off the pixel thugs of sburke I must admit to less than satisfying results due in large part to the underhanded beginnings reported on previously.

Underhanded scum, being the motto of the Shavian House is being played out on the screen before me. Usually his pixel slugs hide behind hedges waiting to shoot men in the back, a testament to the qualities of sburke. However his men are even now starting to eternally prostate themselves in homage before my slowly advancing troops.

The evil denizens of sburke who dispatched my Stug (deservedly so as they were asleep at the switch) are now nothing more than worm food. And the barrage that was so inadequately sent to dispatch my fair troopers to hell sent nothing more than dirt to the heavens. Do you practice the Ray Charles technique of artillery spotting? If you had shot at the sky you would have still missed.

After belching a remarkably long and loud beer burp as a rallying trumpet to my troops, my pixel heroes have shown renewed vigor and a determination to squash this enemy of decency and honor.

You are a blot sburke, a booger that can’t be flicked, a turd that will not flush, a huge zit on the forehead and a festering boil between the legs, the last two of which I am quite sure you are eternally afflicted with.

It’s frightening to think the possibility once existed for me to be your dad, fortunately for me the guy I was with had the exact change. I will not rest until you are disposed of, the doggy station on the bike trail behind my house having the supplies needed.