sburke Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 It's doubtful that he associates with any women who are capable of making intelligent conversation, and wouldn't recognize the difference if he did. The limits of conversation would be him asking, "How much?" and her naming a price. Michael Beats your experience of asking her how much and her replying before she walks away "honey, no amount of money would be enough". As to Watcher, well the name says it all. In his case he doesn't have to worry about her price, he just needs a good bail bondsman and hope he isn't held all weekend before arraignment. His family is already tired of the "will you accept a collect call" from the county lockup. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watcher Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 Beats your experience of asking her how much and her replying before she walks away "honey, no amount of money would be enough". As to Watcher, well the name says it all. In his case he doesn't have to worry about her price, he just needs a good bail bondsman and hope he isn't held all weekend before arraignment. His family is already tired of the "will you accept a collect call" from the county lockup. If I've interpreted your pigeon-English correctly you are attempting to slam me. This from a guy who fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the ride. You know what your problem is: you're a git. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 Beats your experience of asking her how much and her replying before she walks away "honey, no amount of money would be enough". You seem to have me confused with your liege lord. That doesn't surprise at all since you also are in a state of permanent universal confusion. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 You waste of human flesh,………. you air sucking organ bag, I post to you, you walking amoeba through tears of pity. Do you realize you're one stupid post away from living the rest of your life with 10 cats? Virtual women are what you consider an achievement in a relationship with women? Bet your drooling to buy the Ocular Rift 3D headset, what a mess for mother to clean up. Have you ever talked to a woman without having to give your credit card number? Look I can barely tolerate you but for heaven’s sake man, snap out of it. Stop going to strip bars and at least try to engage real females in conversation. And if you must frequent the Bada Bing Gentleman's Club at least remember these few items. Stop holding that one dollar bill in your hand with a death grip and waving it around at her like it's the deed to the Trump Towers... what the hell do you want her to do, marry you ? It's a freakin dollar, put it down on the tip rail already. Stop asking her if her boobs are real. They’re as real as her affection for you. Stop asking her out. You're a smelly, fat loser and the only reason she smiles and coos at you is because she wants your money. Outside of the club she wouldn't even fart your way. Seriously no, her name is not Vixen Blue. And a general rule to abide by is don't try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other. So get it together lad and face the real world. Although you might want to get the ok from your liege Joe Shaw, as he must be beaming in admiration at another fine inductee into the Shavian House. Now, you're being quite unfair to the poor lad. I'll bet there's a distinct possibility she might fart towards him. You know, that if given the option, she'll choose to face away from him at all times. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sburke Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 If I've interpreted your pigeon-English correctly you are attempting to slam me. This from a guy who fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the ride. You know what your problem is: you're a git. I did not fall, I was pushed. If that horse hadn't looked so much like your high school sweetheart maybe you wouldn't be trying to post bail now for that lewd act in public as you attempted "ride" her yourself. You know going to your barn is not what most of us consider a dating site. Then again you are a serf of House Rune. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sburke Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 I'll bet there's a distinct possibility she might fart towards him. You know, that if given the option, she'll choose to face away from him at all times. Mating ritual in Akron? No we do not want to know. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 Mating ritual in Akron? Why? Taking notes for whenever puberty kicks in for ya, Sparky? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 12, 2014 Author Share Posted November 12, 2014 Why? Taking notes for whenever puberty kicks in for ya, Sparky?sburke, if you ARE taking notes ... which I find highly unlikely ... you might want to steer away from Akron ... http://www.akronafterhours.com/video/mating-rituals-clip-103/ Mind you the first lad they demonstrate really does remind one of Boo Radley doesn't he. You Liege, Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted November 12, 2014 Share Posted November 12, 2014 Oh... Joseph, you try so very hard, but as always you end up piddling on your own feet. As it said on the website you found (Oh, and I imagine you were so very pleased with yourself when you found it! You were probably beside yourself with joy, which means there were two of you and that's 12 too many): "Akron After Hours is an Emmy-award-winning sketch comedy show created and run by students at the University of Akron in Akron, Ohio." But being A. From Mormon-Land and 2. Working in the banking trade and III. Well, just being a tremendous git, really... you completely lack an understanding of humor. Which is ironic, seeing how clownish your antics are. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 12, 2014 Author Share Posted November 12, 2014 Oh... Joseph, you try so very hard, but as always you end up piddling on your own feet. As it said on the website you found (Oh, and I imagine you were so very pleased with yourself when you found it! You were probably beside yourself with joy, which means there were two of you and that's 12 too many): "Akron After Hours is an Emmy-award-winning sketch comedy show created and run by students at the University of Akron in Akron, Ohio." But being A. From Mormon-Land and 2. Working in the banking trade and III. Well, just being a tremendous git, really... you completely lack an understanding of humor. Which is ironic, seeing how clownish your antics are.Wait, you mean that was supposed to be FUNNY? Well you see the problem with that, it sure looked like a documentary to me ... but then I don't have your finely tuned OHIO sense of humor honed, no doubt, by decades of chortling over Three Stooges reruns. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sburke Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 Wait, you mean that was supposed to be FUNNY? Well you see the problem with that, it sure looked like a documentary to me ... but then I don't have your finely tuned OHIO sense of humor honed, no doubt, by decades of chortling over Three Stooges reruns. Joe It is a documentary. Boo is so addled he hasn't caught on. You'll have to forgive him, he is a bit slow. Not by Akron standards of course. There he is considered quite bright considering he hasn't managed to lose a limb while trying to use dinnerware. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watcher Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 Mating ritual in Akron? No we do not want to know. Having figured your dating prospects being somewhat wanting, skipped on over to match dot com and sure enough found your dating profile with these little snippets. SOMETHING ABOUT YOU THAT IS NOT VERY WELL KNOWN TO OTHERS Three time convicted sex offender, if your cool with that hit me up for a fun time. SOMETHING THAT WOMEN HAVE COMPLIMENTED YOU ON The way my two teeth are symmetrical. My hair that reminds them of Bill Murray in the film Kingpin. My attention to fashion to include closely matching socks. They absolutely rave about the way my snake belt holds my man boobs up. Need anything else be said about your mating expertise? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sburke Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 blah blah blah your interest in my mating habits makes me wonder if I should be expecting an invite to the prom. okay now to the real stuff Today I wake to another glorious sunrise as I savor the victory of Truth, Justice and the Shavian Way. Yon serf Watcher has been put in his place and the honor of the MBT has been preserved no thanks to the useless gits I observe from the entry hall of the Shavian House while sipping my coffee. Yes a major victory. His handful of guys would have died soon, but in the hallowed traditions of the Shavian House, I was gracious. Yes there is Emrys crawling out from his cardboard box in the gutter, shambling over to defecate on the lawn of that condemned structure called House Rune. Meanwhile there goes Boo (Justiciar wannabe) one finger firmly implanted in his right nostril being chased by Donkey wearing some obscenely bright red lipstick. And lest one forget there goes ng cavscout, once again forgetting his keys and locking himself out of House Rune then proceeding to step in a steaming pile of Emrys. Perhaps his serf will clean his clown shoes in the pissbucket. Yes all is right with the CessPool. My Liege, Joe Shaw Knight Champion of the M.B.T. Justicar for Life of the Peng Challenge Thread, Creator of the Peng Challenge Thread Podcast, CessPool Drain Commissioner and Founder of the Shavian House, note the scoundrel has been booted from our doorstep to head home to House Rune in disgrace. Fittingly. I am not sure which is worse, the shame that he has to go home to House Rune in defeat or simply that he has to go home to House Rune. On a real note my compliments to Watcher- the scenario we chose wasn't the best. Green Hill. He was consistently prompt in sending back turns despite a dismal situation. If you are looking for a scenario to really abuse someone and this would be the place interested in such, suggest they play the Germans in this one and play it up like it should be a cake walk for them. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watcher Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 .sburke ……Just so you know, I am typing this with my two middle fingers. I can only apologize for even having wind in my lungs after such a clinic, that masterful display has made me reconsider everything in my life, how I am, what I do and whether I should even be allowed to live anymore. Having that line of sight over half the map while my troopers were barely able to see to the next hedge was tactical genius incarnate. Your invitation to lecture at the War College should be in the mail. I know in my head I was chanting “sburke you are so awesome” even though my wife heard me screaming “you F@$%^& sweaty B!*#@%* “. There is no good reason I can give for my utterly disappointing performance in our game, where due to my inability to play better, you proceeded to best me. I can’t say that you just bested me, that would not do justice to yourself. You not only beat me, you humped me like Miley Cyrus on a wrecking ball, beat me like a Kuwaiti Pilipino servant , it was like Germany banging 7 in against Brazil. Some days you're the Titanic, some days you're the iceberg, and some days you're the guy who jumped off and hit the propeller on the way down.. But in my defense ng_cavscout there are some extenuating circumstances which to any non-partial observer would factor into the judgment of said loss, some of which follow. On turn 5, I was sitting way too close to the keyboard. Turn 7, bad internet connection. On turn 10, the dog farted causing me to hastily hit the done button in an attempt to flee the foul odor. On turn 15, used wife’s computer which has I Am Woman Hear Me Roar on endless playback.. In turn 17, the song Rubber Ducky was in my head and distracted me. On turn 23, thinking, Damn the Libor Rate Fixing Scandal, it will be our undoing, making the game insignificant. On turn 26, depressed after missing liquor store Halloween sale. Turn 27, depressed after spending entire pension check on liquor store after Halloween sale. On turn 28, was a bit chilly out and I don’t think I ever really loosened up properly. On turn 29, the in game time was too early. The blades in the grass and the weeds had not stood up yet. Man, if we played later in the day my moving troops would have had more concealment. On turn 30, friend was on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire and I was on pins and needles in case he called me for a lifeline. Turn 32, was in the loo for way too long, absorbed in Rajik’s Commentaries on the “Education Budgets in the Middle East” and lost focus, On turn 33, I forgot to trim my finger nails, and kept hitting wrong keys. On turn 35, still despondent over the death of Bambi’s mother. On turn 47, new mouse. On turn 56, played with the sun in my eyes. Turn 58, played with the moon in my eyes. Turn 63, played with hangnail on right index finger and using the mouse caused excruciating pain. Turn 65, just got out of jail. Turn 67, wife just got out of jail. The list could go on but I think you get the point. Sometimes the player who plays best doesn’t win. He finishes second behind the guy with the most luck. On a real note my compliments to Watcher- the scenario we chose wasn't the best. Green Hill. He was consistently prompt in sending back turns despite a dismal situation. If you are looking for a scenario to really abuse someone and this would be the place interested in such, suggest they play the Germans in this one and play it up like it should be a cake walk for them. Am touched by your honesty, but then the wife says I’m a little touched in the head. Joe may have to reconsider his wisdom in choosing you, as from what I have observed here honesty is not high on the Shavian House list of priorities. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 Oh... Joseph, you try so very hard, but as always you end up piddling on your own feet. Given the state of his equipment, that's probably as far as he is able to reach. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 13, 2014 Author Share Posted November 13, 2014 "And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!" Well done and well done again My Most Loyal and Trustworthy Squire sburke. You are well on your way lad to becoming yet another sterling example of a Knight of the CessPool in the grand and glorious tradition of the Shavian House. Speaking of which, I really think we should rename the main passage down here to ... wait for it ... the Shavian Way. Kind of like the Appian Way without the, you know, Apps. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watcher Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 Speaking of which, I really think we should rename the main passage down here to ... wait for it ... the Shavian Way. Kind of like the Appian Way without the, you know, Apps. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT Way to the CessPool named Shavian Way? Kinda like calling the large intestine a butt tube to the anus? Something we finally agree on,You got my vote. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 13, 2014 Author Share Posted November 13, 2014 Way to the CessPool named Shavian Way? Kinda like calling the large intestine a butt tube to the anus? Something we finally agree on,You got my vote.Ah Watcher (spelt but not bolded) ... more class, less crass. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted November 13, 2014 Author Share Posted November 13, 2014 Well My Most Loyal and Trustworthy Squire sburke, Your Devoted Liege hasn't been idle on the CM front either. Dedicated readers of this thread, and really, who isn't, will remember that NG Cavscout was crowing about killing a scout car or two a few pages ago. Well I must report that in one single turn the forces of all that's good and true in the world today ... i.e. MINE ... killed two of his vaunted T-34/85s. It is a Meeting Engagement and, true to his cavalry roots, he completely ignored that and, having secured the Victory Area, decided to boldly charge forward ... right into my guns. Custer would have been proud. N.B. Forrest maybe not so much. Once again ... I expect his surrender momentarily. Your Liege, Sir Joe Shaw JFLPCT 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sburke Posted November 13, 2014 Share Posted November 13, 2014 If you must know I have it on good authority that his handle is the result of his poor spelling abilities. It was meant to be cubscout. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Emrys Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 "And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!" Well done and well done again My Most Loyal and Trustworthy Squire sburke. Get a room, why don't you? You're about to make me throw up and I'm not going to clean up after. Michael 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watcher Posted November 14, 2014 Share Posted November 14, 2014 Get a room, why don't you? You're about to make me throw up and I'm not going to clean up after. Michael Some people should use a glue stick instead of chap stick. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sburke Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 Was wondering about the overall performance of House Rune when I came upon their units in training. Apparently on this course they are given 20 rounds and if they manage to hit the tree they are immediately promoted. It explains a lot. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Watcher Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 Was wondering about the overall performance of House Rune when I came upon their units in training. Apparently on this course they are given 20 rounds and if they manage to hit the tree they are immediately promoted. Talk is cheap, but so are you. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted November 15, 2014 Share Posted November 15, 2014 "And, has thou slain the Jabberwock? Justicar Jubjub bird. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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