Hortlund

Everyone owes me turns. And yet I sit here, waiting patiently. I'm such a nice guy. I mean really.

/%¤#&¤# groupies...

Not that there is anything wrong with THAT... Ok, now GO AWAY. I'm serious. Get away from here you creep. Maybe you're thinking "I'll just stop by and say hello" ...well dont. Consider yourself not wanted. Have you ever walked in the desert? Have you ever walked for miles and miles under the unforgiving sun? Without water, without shelter or shadow? Have you? As you can imagine, it's not really that fun. Have you tried it wearing black clothes? Thats even less fun. Now imagine walking in the sun for miles and miles, for hours and hours, wearing black clothes, without water. Your sweating, your thirsty, so very thirsty. Your mouth feels like sandpaper, your tounge feels like a dead gerbil. And its warm. And your really sick and tired of the heat and the sun and the sand. And it feels like you have a dead rat in your mouth. Now imagine seeing someone in the distance. You gaze towards the figure wondering, hoping, praying that it is someone who has some water for you to drink. The person walks up to you and says Hey man, are you thirsty? You sure look thirsty...do you want some water? yes... please you whisper with a weak voice...trembling at the thought of some cold fresh water. Well, I dont have any water, but you can have as much salt as you want says the man and holds out his hand filled with shining white salt. You are about as wanted here in this MBT as that fistful of salt. So take a hint and SOD OFF. If you decide to stick around, despite our best efforts to make you leave, you might consider challenging someone. Challenge someone like yourself, some lowlife, scum sucking newbie (SSN) who wants to get a thrill by actually posting on the MBT. Do NOT challenge ME or any of the Knights of the CessPool, we will laugh at you ... actually we'll laugh at you anyway but you won't get a game so don't try. We MIGHT sic a Squire on you for our amusement and if so you should ... well, amuse us! Sound off as if you have a pair, none of this mamby pamby, mother may I, golly fellows what a swell lot of chaps you have here may I join then CRAP. In doing so, however, do not sound off ABOUT your pair. Leave your personal hang ups, political, sexual, racial and so forth for the General Discussion forum because we don't care. Just good old fashioned personal attacks... Be EXTEMEMLY NICE to the the Ladies of the CessPool or you'll incur our wrath and get sent to Coventry and never be mentioned again. Show some respect for those who have MADE it here since you have NOT and likely enough never will.

Bah, it is plain to see that it was my brilliant and dashingly witty "oversexed"-comment that threw him off balance. After that mental sledgehammer blow he was desperately stumbling around like someone who first barefooted stepped on a piece of LEGO in the middle of the night, and then kicked his toe into the side of the door. Of cource he was an easy target after that...even for your horrible "Deliverance"-style You've got a nice mouth, boy attempt at wit. I claim 12.5% of the credit. [ May 07, 2003, 10:46 AM: Message edited by: Leutnant Hortlund ]

I suppose it would be too much to ask of you MrSpkr to actually CHECK YOUR MAIL before going off like an obnoxious drunk trying to get the bartender to spot him a beer on the house. You have had the turn waiting for you there since early this morning, you goathearder-wannabe.

My work here is done. Unfortunately I cannot tell you all about my involvement in this, since it is strictly classified. But lets just say that I supplied the carrots and leave it at that.

Depends on which direction you run...

Well, set up a 5 turn quickbattle then you chicken****-flankshooting-ATguncamping-snobnosed-crackhoreWANNABE

Nope. Just a bit oversexed.

Very interesting reading.

There...are everyone satisfied now?

muahaha....I'm doing your turns now you lazy sods. I invite you all to drink cold poison served by my men.

Maybe I should explain my somewhat sporadic turn frequency this past week. Its just my way to say I hate you all. (I'm quitting my work on May 12th, and I have *alot* to do before I can leave. The details would bore you all to tears, lets just say it involves alot of writing horribly dull documents)

That's just not true. I picked my forces yesterday, and I was just about to send you the turn. Then the dog ate my email. Its true.

yeah, like I want to have my home email adress on display around these baboons. *points to the crowd of outerboarders who read this thread but dont have the guts/intelligence/wit/opposing thumbs required to post here* [ April 28, 2003, 02:44 PM: Message edited by: Leutnant Hortlund ]

Yeah, but I only found it yesterday. What on earth possessed you to send it to that adress when we have been using the other one for the past three months? Pillock.

Let me guess, you forgot to cover yourself in fish-urine?

Until the morning </font>

Ahh...alone in my appartment. Drinking beer and listening to mp3's while ironing my shirt. Life is good. Hangover is gone too.

I'm hungover and I have another party I have to go to in four hours. (These once every second month, completely child-free weekends are truly exhausting) *grabs a beer* A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do...

I'm hungover.

I'm drunk

Surprises through history #2 You're kidding right? AND in the middle of the desert? -Another surprised ancient construction engineer...Egyptian this time

*sigh* [ April 25, 2003, 02:27 AM: Message edited by: Leutnant Hortlund ]

Malakovski Meet me in a village, on the central front in May. Make 1944 the year for this sweet, one summer day. Leave all your tanks at home this time, much to your dismay But bring 2000 points or so, in an unrestricted way. Fit and healty, both we are, with no men gone astray. Our ammo will be full of cource, this noon in early May. I'll bring my veteran Germans, infantry men and all. You can bring just any kind you want, to this gentle ball. Yes, there I will be standing firm, amidst the rolling hills. In 45+ turns from now will end, this battle of the wills. The trees are nice, but not too much, make moderate their cover. We'll se how many there'll be left, when once this fight is over Make large the map, make warm the air, make gentle breeze the wind. Meeting engagement is what to call, a battle of this kind. Vehicles are fine to bring, yes take your pick, that's right. But not one tank may show its tracks, in this our little fight. Make sure to bring a pen and paper, for an AAR we'll write. To show the sorry sods around, how real men does the fight. So now you know just what to click to make this battle cruel. And send the setup to my mail, so we can start this duel.