OGSF Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Ah'd merely lak tae mention at this brief juncture, tha' Ah'm in tha process o' kackin' Speedy's spooty arrrse all o'er tha bleedin' map. Lorak as killin' mah poor wee veteran gerbil love toys tae death. Bastarrd! Noo, here's mah wee poem, after tha Reverend Charles Dodgson... 'Twas brillig, an the slithy Meeks did gyre an' gimble in tha Mace All mimsy were tha Lorak cheeks, And the Speedyraths outgrace. "Beware the ObergruppenStompinFuhrer, my son! The jaws tha bite, tha claws tha catch! Beware the Berli bird, and shun the frumious Pawbroom snatch!" jd took his sword in hand; Long time tha maxome foe he sought- So rested he by the Stuka tree. And stood a while in thought. As in uffish thought he stood, The newbie, with eyes of flame, Came whiffling through the Cesspool wood, And burbled as it came. One, two! One, two! And through and through The vorpal blade went snicker-snack He left it dead, and with it's head He went galumphing back. "Has though slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my Hiram boy! Oh fabjous day! Calloh! Callay! He chortled in his joy. 'Twas brillig, an the slithy Meeks did gyre an' gimble in tha Mace All mimsy were tha Lorak cheeks, And the Speedyraths outgrace. Wha'hey tha' noo! SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastardABCD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OGSF: Ah'd merely lak tae mention at this brief juncture, tha' Ah'm in tha process o' kackin' Speedy's spooty arrrse all o'er tha bleedin' map. Lorak as killin' mah poor wee veteran gerbil love toys tae death. Bastarrd! Noo, here's mah wee poem, after tha Reverend Charles Dodgson... 'Twas brillig, an the slithy Meeks did gyre an' gimble in tha Mace All mimsy were tha Lorak cheeks, And the Speedyraths outgrace. "Beware the ObergruppenStompinFuhrer, my son! The jaws tha bite, tha claws tha catch! Beware the Berli bird, and shun the frumious Pawbroom snatch!" jd took his sword in hand; Long time tha maxome foe he sought- So rested he by the Stuka tree. And stood a while in thought. As in uffish thought he stood, The newbie, with eyes of flame, Came whiffling through the Cesspool wood, And burbled as it came. One, two! One, two! And through and through The vorpal blade went snicker-snack He left it dead, and with it's head He went galumphing back. "Has though slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my Hiram boy! Oh fabjous day! Calloh! Callay! He chortled in his joy. 'Twas brillig, an the slithy Meeks did gyre an' gimble in tha Mace All mimsy were tha Lorak cheeks, And the Speedyraths outgrace. Wha'hey tha' noo! SirMacOberGruppenBloodyStompinSicFeuhrerBastardABCD <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Sporran sniffer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Since I posted before reading to the current end of the thread and discovering that others had already reminded Wigman and StevewhowillbesacrificedinthelabsoIcandoexperimentsonhim that they have to post regular updates full of bile, pus, bitterness, envy, and general animosity, I'll take this opportunity to berate Elvis instead. I'm a little low on games (and yes, I know that I'm a day or so overdue on a few of them). Elvis, that was pathetic ("Wankers"). You can do better than that. You're starting to sound like one of those looky-loos who pops into the pool every time the thread starts anew, perhaps not realizing that if they want to post they have to suffer abuse, and the occasional game. Btw, I think this was posted before, but are you the young, pelvis shaking elvis, or the fat elvis that played vegas? Or are you some kind of cheap icon painted on velvet in tijuana and sold in an empty lot on the corner of 11 mile and dequindre? Oh, yeah and stevetheexperimentallabanimal-- if you lose your match with wigman you get sacrificed in the name of science and we rip the few neurons that you may have (and I'm sure I'll be disappointed) out of your head so that I can do experiments with them. ------------------ Slayer of the Original Cesspool Thread. [This message has been edited by chrisl (edited 01-13-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamstersss Posted January 13, 2001 Author Share Posted January 13, 2001 Here we all post, long the Cesspoolhanna, Here we all post while the newbies balk, Taunting them fools from the dawn till sunset, Getting no rest till the Peng - na - rooock, Take me way from the Cesspoolhanna, Take me way from the dumb newbie, There was once here such a Cesspool, That's a place where I'd like - to - beeeee, Old first Cesspool, That old first Cesspool, It must be out there, But sure seems nowhere, It just keeps rolling, It keeps on rolling along. It don't make **** jokes, There's no bad posters, And them that were there, Threw newbies in roasters. It just keeps rolling, It keeps on rolling, along. You and me, We sweat and strain, Posting witty comments, But all in vain. Tell Bauhaus to sit, Kill that newbie, You heads of to the Arctic, And the morons get free. And as I'm posting, The taunts get sweeter, I'll brag 'bout topplements, And lose to cheaters. And old man Cesspool, He'll just keep rolling, He keeps on rolling, along. ------------------ ‘I don’t believe in a Jaberwocke, Vanya. If the thing existed, it would have killed us years ago. At the very least, it would have killed the fat beavers and deer. More likely, there is a great, invisible rabbit, that stalks us even now, biding its time.’ Seanachai continued with a chuckle, ‘Yes, I would as much believe in a terrible rabbit of doom as the Jaberwocke.’ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrPeng Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 OK There is something about being gravely ill. There is a guilty pleasure in lying about in a febril stupor. The only thing that you care about is that next dose of codeine cough syrup. When your fever breaks in the middle of the night and the nurse has to change your sheets from the gallons of sweat that poured out of you, there is a giddy sense of accomplishment: "I just sweated 80% of the water out of my body! COOL! Oh, Nursie dear, please crank up the volume on my IV. feeling a bit dry over here." There is a an oddly masochistic undercurrent of smugness and comfort in being so dehydrated that your lips fall off in great chapped hunks. Intravenous antibiotics not only kill the bug that made you sick, they kill EVERYTHING: not a single blemish anywhere on my skin, no more gingivitis, not a jot of a microbe within 50 meters. The oral antibiotics take care of the intestinal tract too. The feeling of internal void that comes from every last bit of anything you ever ingested blasting from your hind quarters in violent liquid jets is most exhilirating. The explosions emanating from the WC unnerves your roomate, whom you didn't like having in the first place. God only knows what sort of vile disease he is carrying around. When your delerium breaks, you find that you are all alone on a sunday afternoon. You watch your first football game, uninterrupted from front to back, since your twins were born. The only things missing are beers and some smokes. When it is time to go home, you find that walking form the car to the front door, a distance of approximately 25 feet, casues you to begin coughing uncontrollably. You continue to cough for 15 more minutes after you lie down. You find that small children are undaunted by a wretching, hacking grubby looking old man, and you worry that they are perfect prey for some wretching, hacking grubby old pederast unless you firghten the crap out of them about the dangers of wretching hacking grubby old men RIGHT NOW! But you are too tired for a good frighten, so you make a mental note to yourself to frighten them really well later. 10 days later they tell you that you can go back to work. It takes another ten days before you remember what exactly it is you do at work. And every day you come home unable to breathe from the weld smoke in the plant or the cold air or the distance from the car to the front door. You wonder when if ever your cough will go away. You think that if the cough doesn't go away soon you will simply rip your own throat out, but not, of course, before you rip your spouse's out. You think back to when you were lying there with a sac of fluid draining into you, and the rotten gut, and the giddy, heady codeine buzz careening through you otherwise empty skull, and you wonder if you could please, pretty please, have a relapse. Anything to get out of this daily not sick not healthy treadmill. A gunshot wound to the belly. A hammer blow to the head. Being fed into the wood chipper alive would be fine too. Anything but this purgatory of non-illness crepitatiousness. But you cough some more. ------------------ "I hope a bucket of nails falls on your head..." Hamsters/Meeks(!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 And now for something completely different: An update. Berli -- wants me to blindly follow his troops into trap af ter trap in his bocage map ... which is outstanding by the way. What does he take me for? Some kind of id... uh, don't answer that. BlouseHouse -- Has no idea what he is in for. He drew first blood, but alot more of his will be flowing soon. Shandorf -- has the upper hand. Whacked my TDs who just didn't know what the feck they were doing out there. Seanachai -- has finally brought out the big gun ... the Churchill. He keeps asking for an armor joust. I keep telling him I don't have any armor. Silly game we play. PushBroom -- has yet to respond in our pre-hiatus game, which is down to the last turn. Could be a draw. Could be a minor vic. Elvis -- Off to a bad, very bad start, courtesy of Rune. Seems some of his troops were set up in the middle of a company of cranky Boche. They were quickly dispatched. Goanna -- haven't heard back from the wily Lizard in our return-to-roots game of LD. Kitty -- Got in the first lick, as it were. But, there's a lot of game to be played. Sgt. Morgue -- Is doing what he does best ... beating the snot out of my guys. Lorak -- Setup will be headed your way ... it's a Berlichingen special. Your last chance to choose a side. Thumpre -- Move and parry, move and parry. Serpentine, Shel, serpentine. Gunfight really just getting under way. Peng -- It's about down to hand-to-hand combat now. He's finding out how nasty FJs are at short range. ------------------ "Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line [This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 01-13-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 double post. nothing to see here. move along. ------------------ "Moriarty, you suck." -- Dunno, but somebody must've said it somewhere along the line [This message has been edited by Moriarty (edited 01-13-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Well, well. Wouldn't be much of a Peng thread without a proper Penging, would it? There's been a conspicuous void in the time/hate continuum, and you newbies must now genuflect in the Presence of the Master... <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng: crank up the volume on my IV.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> My lawyers are reviewing this for possible infringements. Good to have you back. Remind me to kill you if you survive. Otherwise, what size are those boots? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Moriarty: And now for something completely different: An update. PushBroom -- has yet to respond in our pre-hiatus game, which is down to the last turn. Could be a draw. Could be a minor vic.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> This could be a double post which since The New Coming of Peng is a severe disrespect and violation of regulations. BTW Peng, glad you're back. As one of our former president (MacMahon 1873-79) said: "I know what you've been through is a terribly wicked illness, either you die or you stay idiot for the rest of your life, I know that because I had one earlier in my life" ------------------ You are not Obsessive-CMpulsive, you are Allied-Retentive. Mark IV [This message has been edited by PawBroon (edited 01-13-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamstersss Posted January 13, 2001 Author Share Posted January 13, 2001 Welcome back Peng. I'm still pissed at you for ignoring your ICQ that night. However, considering you just suffered through hell, I'm willing to forgive you. ------------------ ‘I don’t believe in a Jaberwocke, Vanya. If the thing existed, it would have killed us years ago. At the very least, it would have killed the fat beavers and deer. More likely, there is a great, invisible rabbit, that stalks us even now, biding its time.’ Seanachai continued with a chuckle, ‘Yes, I would as much believe in a terrible rabbit of doom as the Jaberwocke.’ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Check6: That is most definitely not a haiku.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> and you're definitely not human, but do I mention it? (oh, I did)! Must suck to be you! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Oh no, the Peng has returned! Quick, push Mace under the surface! Someone throw the newbies at him – we might have time to sort this place out before he's finished with them! ------------------ 1) My troops ran out of the building as it was being damaged and got slaughtered! I'm angry! 2) Hey! My troops stayed in the building as it got damaged and got slaughtered! I'm angry! – Mr. Clark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Mildmannered Get your puckered, looping, pile-dangling fat arse into gear and send me your death-certifying f'ing file, you worthless as an encrusted plankton in the corner of an excuciatingly elderly blue whale with no family or friends, pansy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Well I see Rodentacedsteve (hey like those incisors boy) saved me from having to resurrect this thread from slipping to page 2. I am here at work on a drizzly Sat morning and truly loathing and despising you all. That eternal squire (no never shall he rise above his lowly state) Croda and I are engaged in a Battalion (plus) sized battle. He has chosen to attack and is getting a warm welcome. This last turn he said my tactics are the same as Shandorful's. Some how I do not feel better knowing that. Ser Cruda has learned that hvy arty falling in woods over his troops can be hazardous to his health. His attack seems to be getting a little off their time table. Seannychai seems to have reverted to his standard tactics of bleating for me to "JUST DIE" because he seems unable to manage it himself. Mr 666 has started our game with parking his trucks, loaded with infantry out in the wide open spaces. Hmmm I wonder what I can do with that? Everyone else owes me a turn, so get with it you putrescent scum, hell I know you are dog**** under my shoes but get on the stick. ------------------ If frogs had uzi's, snakes woudn't mess with them so much. - Hiram [This message has been edited by jd (edited 01-13-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisl Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Hey, where is everybody? The pool was 4 lines from the bottom of page one. Did everybody head out for the long weekend? What's wrong with you all-- you should be locked up at home playing CM via TCP/IP. And where's the reports from Wigman and the lab animal? It appears that they aren't worthy, and ought to be sent over to the hull rotation thread as punishment. hey Patboone, you goose-organ-eating gibberish-spewing freak, now that you're back, will you return the files for the game we started (well, at least set up), or do I have to smack you in the face with a haggis again to get you into a game. I bet you like haggis--you and the grumpystumpfetishist probably have haggis parties. ------------------ Slayer of the Original Cesspool Thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 KrissKross I have one of those 'girlfriend' appendages that constanly leeches my attention away from these halls like some clingy vampired puppy. But even I manage to take time out to a) Demand from Mouldmoan my passport to a seat on 'The Board' To waste my time completely (and get a right verbal thrashing from the aforementioned 'girlfriend' thing meanwhile) answering your query. Which, by the way, is I have no file to report because I have no FILE. ****, I have just had my eardrum blown through. Time I started administering trouser-wearers authority. (Yes dear, anything you say dear. Yes, just turning it off now dear...) Bitch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chupacabra Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Nrg. While not as sick as Peng, I have still spent the past two and a half days railing at God in between trips to the bathroom. I didn't know it was possible to have a really bad cold and a nasty stomach flu at the same time, but after all, this is the country that brought us Fergie, Benny Hill, and Hugh Grant, so they've pretty much cornered the market on annoying plagues over here. About three hours ago I coughed up roughly ten tons of orange snot, and I'm now feeling much better. Better yet, I still have three-quarters of a bottle of Robitussin left. Yep, the good kind of Robitussin. So it's party time in London, boys. Lock up your Hirams, the night is young and I aim to get loaded on cough syrup. If I can find my copy of Appetite for Destruction, none of you will be safe. In short, I will rock your ****ing face. I WILL ROCK YOUR ****ING FACE!!!! Thank you. ------------------ Soy super bien soy super super bien soy bien bien super bien bien bien super super Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 Peng. you worthless git! The next time death is knocking on your door, answer it! We were close to being rid of you for good, and you blew it (Bauhaus sit the hell down). What the hell is going on in the bald one's alleged mind? Meeks has inherited the Pool! Christ on a bloody crutch, who in thier right mind would give Meeks control of anything? Meeks is a brick you throw at idiots, not a leader by any stretch of the imagination. Lorak the un-noticed, you started out well (nice arty barrage that caught my troops in the open), but then you folded like a bath towel. Scribe thusly: Berli: Won (major) Lorak: Lost Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Check6 Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 As I just admitted to JD, I am really kicking myself for buying those trucks for a map with so little cover. But I should point out that the ones really parked out in the open are probably dead already. But we shall see how it goes. Peng, your most eloquent post made me want to get infected with whatever the hell it is that you had. Would you, perhaps, cough in a vial and mail it to me? ~Chuckles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 Lorak, I can't get onto your site. I don't know if it my connection or your site but.... Mark down a win for Peter who beat the almost unbeatable Elvis. I also don't know if you got my wins against Peng. If you haven't count the 2 wins as one because he is in a weaken condition. So if you count one count the 99-1 Elvis victory....Oh yeah I almost forgot Peng and I also played to a draw last night. ------------------ What do we do with a terrible liar? Well, Great liars we send into the clergy. Good liars we groom for politics. Moderate liars we supply with sherrif's badges and guns, and the bad liars, well, we make them heroin whores. So what the hell do we do with the Terrible Liars? Well, it seems we turn them into physicists called "chrisl." Peng Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 Hey, I was just wondering, who audits Lorak's books? Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest *Captain Foobar* Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 Oh great, a new pool. OK, I am a man of few words. When I talk, it must be something important, so listen up, fools. Why must everyone post so many words here? I find myself confused at every turn, by all these strange references, about things that mean nothing to the readers, and even less to the author. And every time I turn around there are 8 new pages I have to read. You people are really bothering me lately. I remember the good old days, back when the beta demo was expected to be out any day. I could read everything of interest on the forum in the matter of 30 minutes. But now, look at this place. It overwhelms me, at the first instant I see it. I cant be spending all my time reading about APDS rounds, and angle of attack, and tcp-ip problems, and sound contacts... ENOUGH! My life is complicated. This is the only refuge I have from all the insidious bastards trying to wreck my life. I need help. I am hurt and angry. I will try to find my way back here, if any of you have any advice for me. I love you all.... Foobar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 Your despair is so great, looks like suicides the only answer for you Foo! muhahahahahahahahahahaha! Mace [This message has been edited by Mace (edited 01-13-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geier Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by *Captain Foobar*: I need help.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I can't think of any worse place in existence to ask for help. Piss off. ------------------ Johan "The succesful execution of a well devised plan often looks like luck to saps." Dashiell Hammett Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted January 14, 2001 Share Posted January 14, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MrPeng: OK There is something about being gravely ill. There is a guilty pleasure in lying about in a febril stupor. The only thing that you care about is that next dose of codeine cough syrup. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> One must be sick to achieve moments like this? Someone should have told me, I've been doing it all wrong. Ah, mortality. Just a quick word to Death: bugger off and leave Peng alone, my good man. I've got a rather lengthy list of alternatives that we'd just as soon send into the game ahead of him, thank you very much. Thank all the gods, Peng, but most especially my own patroness, the Lady of the Forest, that you post once again. Now, on that note, are we ever going to finish this all-but-dead piece of ****e that Rune inflicted on us, courtesy of WBW? Let me know, lunger. ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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