That Olde Peng Challenge Has Me In It's Spell

[Mace]

Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

I'm warning you mate, keep it up and I will personally jump on the first available Quantas flight out of here, show up on your doorstep and pummel you to death with a burlap sack full of doorknobs.

Personally, I would recommend Qantas, because if you choose to fly with the one you indicated you'll have a bloody long wait.

Mace

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by athkatla:

Well Bo Diddley I've yet to see what your pathetic excuses for troops are wearing........as you still haven't shown up! I suspect that they are all dressed in yellow, to match the streaks down their backs, get them into battle now, before I am forced to hurl soggy lumps of camel droppings in your general direction, in the vain hope that some of it may find it's way into the biggest orifice in your body, to match that which regularly comes forth from said hole.

Two things.

Z) That last sentence was far too convoluted to be effective. If you have to work at it, it's just not worth it.

A) As for my troops not having shown up on the third move, forgive me. I had forgotten that I was playing a former member of the British army, whose concept of stealth has always been to run as fast as they can, shouting and screaming, towards the enemy line.

Don't worry, Sparky. I'll get there.

Originally posted by Papa Hem'n'haw:

My point exactly! Had you an ounce of creativity coursing through those hypodermic riddled, vericose, bacon bit clogged obscenities you call "veins", you might have come up with something a wee tad more original Boo-Boo.

Now don't force me to fire up Panzer Armee Khann and unleash my superior tactical awareness upon you. {redneck mode}For if'n I do, you'll be a turnin' as pale as your namesake.{/redneck mode}

Papa

Good Grief, here I am again answering two, TWO, blithering idiots in one post. I'm sorry, but this was never in my job description and I'm going to have to start asking for more money from here on.

Now, Pupa? As for me not having an ounce of creativity because I used this name instead of some other in honoring a great book and it's subsequent film, you could not be more wrong. You could try, but you would not succeed.

I imagine in that warped, psychedelically induced fugue state you normally operate in, I should have chosen a name such as "Skippy" or perhaps "Barney", but you see, it just isn't right. You should really seek out professional help. You're just hurting those who love or perhaps merely tolerate you.

[Papa Khann]

Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

mass snippage of mindless drivel

I imagine in that warped, psychedelically induced fugue state you normally operate in, I should have chosen a name such as "Skippy" or perhaps "Barney", but you see, it just isn't right. You should really seek out professional help. You're just hurting those who love or perhaps merely tolerate you.

Not "Barney". But perhaps "Blarney".

Papa

[Patchy]

OK...I'll try this one again!

The Mad Scotsman meets the Donkey.

(hint: OGSF and Yeknod)

Persephone

[Mace]

I used to wonder what was worn under the kilt.

After looking at that photo, I just don't want to know any more. *feels nauseous*

Mace

[OGSF]

Di ye see tha SIZE o' tha' sporran, mon? Di ye see at? Noo ainly as hae a HANDSOME laddie, but hae REQUIRES a BIG sporran!

Anonymous Admirer

[Mace]

Originally posted by OGSF:

Di ye see tha SIZE o' tha' sporran, mon? Di ye see at? Noo ainly as hae a HANDSOME laddie, but hae REQUIRES a BIG sporran!

Anonymous Admirer

So how come he was wearing a small one in this photo then?

Mace

[Guest PondScum]

Originally posted by OGSF:

Di ye see tha SIZE o' tha' sporran, mon?

Sporran? Sporran?? I thought that was a rabid badger going for yer nads. Although given your oblivious happiness to this horrifying event in the photo, it's obvious that you're dead from the waist down (as well as from the neck up).

[ June 28, 2002, 08:00 PM: Message edited by: PondScum ]

[Mace]

Now look at Yeknathod's, It even comes with built in protuberances.

Now THAT's a sporran!

Mace

[Mace]

Originally posted by PondScum:

0Sporran? Sporran?? I thought that was a rabid badger going for yer nads. Although given your oblivious happiness to this horrifying event in the photo, it's obvious that you're dead from the waist down (as well as from the neck up).

I think the only thing dead here is the badger....must have been from shock?

Mace

[Noba]

Ahhhh Yessss ! My cookies are working in the proper sequences again !

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

I'm warning you mate, keep it up and I will personally jump on the first available Quantas flight out of here, show up on your doorstep and pummel you to death with a burlap sack full of doorknobs.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Replied by Mace

Personally, I would recommend Qantas, because if you choose to fly with the one you indicated you'll have a bloody long wait.

And if your travel agent ever sorts you out, stop by my place at the bottom of the hill and i'll apply a *BOOT* in the general direction of Roleystone where the old codger lives.

The rest of you, your turns are around somewhere. You can wait a bit longer.

Noba.

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Mace:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

I'm warning you mate, keep it up and I will personally jump on the first available Quantas flight out of here, show up on your doorstep and pummel you to death with a burlap sack full of doorknobs.

Personally, I would recommend Qantas, because if you choose to fly with the one you indicated you'll have a bloody long wait.

Mace</font>

[Simon Elwen]

Evening All . My My a couple of days at work and nearly a whole thread to wade through , a couple of new lads in the dorm too .

Updatery

A J as if have myopic old men on my side wern't enough he shoots smoke at them too .

Harv fun in the fog this ain't

Lurk He has resumed his advances towards me , I'm shy and retiring though

Lars This is a tough fight , time to smoke em out

Noba Glorious defeat will be his again hehehe

The Capt I have repulsed his first advances towards me because I'm shy and retiring

I wonder why OGSF is waving his urine sample about ? Only he knows I suppose .

If I owe anyone a turn , I owe them a turn , I'm sure you will let me know in the nicest possible way

[rleete]

Papa Kahn's forces of evil, nasty men was not swayed by my haughty Cannucks bravely marching into death. His self-admitted use of homing schrecks caused our fine steel steeds to become campfires for his s'mores. He used sound infantry tactics, and other unseemingly behavior in a Der Kessel scenario. Sir Mensch would have been very disturbed (not that he isn't already) to see such groggly conduct {unbecomming a 'pooler} in one of the scenarios from his site.

Is Lorak still chalking up losses? Make this one my third. I'm on a roll.

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Noba:

Ahhhh Yessss ! My cookies are working again !

Ah, that's swell Caur-NOBA-polish-for-a-lasting-shine, just make sure you wash your hands when you're done, OK?

[ June 28, 2002, 11:29 PM: Message edited by: Boo_Radley ]

[Papa Khann]

Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

That's it? THAT'S IT??? What's the deal? The medication finally kicking in? Did the nurses cut short your playtime with "Mr. Computer" because it was time for Jello?

I don't know what to say.

Well, when have you ever?

I was just getting fired up and now I've got to back burner everything. This is quite a letdown.

And I should think, my dear Boo-Boo, that you would be used to letdowns by now. Hasn't your entire miserable little excuse for a life been nothing but one big letdown?

Still, I am not utterly without pity (except where AussieJeff is concerned). Since you seem to crave my attention so much, I shall take this opportunity to thank you for ruining what used to be a perfectly wonderful film for me. Now every time I watch it, I'll be compelled to think of some silly git (that's you, in case you're wondering) instead of Robert Duvall during this snippet of dialog:

"Well, judging from his tracks, he's about six and a half feet tall. He eats raw squirrels, and all the cats he can catch. There's a long, jagged scar that runs all the way across his face. His teeth are yellow and rotten. His eyes are popped. And he drools most of the time."

Now I'm not saying it isn't accurate. After all, YOU chose it. I'm just saying it'll probably ruin the film for me.

Papa

[Papa Khann]

Quick update of ongoing games.

Game 1

Scenario:

- Jabos!

Force Allotments:

- The glorious forces of the Fatherland, arrayed in all their power and splendor (well, what is left of them, anyway), Me.

- The pathetic alliance of wayward Yankees, refugees, and the Coalition of Wal-Mart Greeters, Joe Shaw.

Turns 9 and 10: Oh h*ll, why bother? I'm TOAST. Absolutely TOAST. Reduced to finishing the game just so I don't have to listen to Joe whine about how I wouldn't drive my last panzer around on the battlefield so he could shoot at it some more.

Oh the shame.

Game 2

Scenario:

- Trun

Force Allotments:

- The glorious forces of the Fatherland, arrayed in all their power and splendor, Me.

- {general sounds of me ROFLMAO} Canadians! Can you believe it!?! Canadians!!... R_Leete.

Turn 1: I have one decent support asset. R_Leete uses a very crafty technique. So crafty in fact that IMHO, it bordered on cheating. He shot lots of stuff at it. It got whacked.

Things were shaping up to be not so good.

Turn 2: R_Leete informed me that his parents would allow him to stay up until 9 p.m. this evening, so we switched to TCP/IP.

Turns 3-15: R_Leete attempted to demonstrate just how amazingly advantageous it is to send squad after squad of infantry into the teeth of a defensive position carefully constructed by my superior tactical awareness. Fortunately for me, he failed to notice that it was advantageous for me, not for him.

He then tried to compensate for his inept use of infantry by demonstrating parade ground manuvers with his armor. Way to go, R_Leete. Drive those AFVs right up to the anti-tank teams. Sooner or later, one will get through and squash the dowdy young Huns under the tracks. Next time, why not put down the beer and pretzels and try using the big pointy thing sticking out of the turret?

Honestly, R_Leete, I asked you to play as the Canadians during this scenario. Not to play as if you were a Canadian.

Outcome: R_Leete falls to my superior tactical awareness as Panzer Armee Khann scores a Major Victory.

R_Leete, I have prepared the setup file for our rematch. It is on its way to you.

Papa

[Moriarty]

Originally posted by R_Leete:

Papa Kahn's forces of evil, nasty men was not swayed by my haughty Cannucks bravely marching into death. His self-admitted use of homing schrecks caused our fine steel steeds to become campfires for his s'mores. He used sound infantry tactics, and other unseemingly behavior in a Der Kessel scenario. Sir Mensch would have been very disturbed (not that he isn't already) to see such groggly conduct {unbecomming a 'pooler} in one of the scenarios from his site.

Is Lorak still chalking up losses? Make this one my third. I'm on a roll.

Roight, you keep this sort of thing going and you'll end up a hopeless cause in the House of Moriarty.

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by Persephone:

OK...I'll try this one again!

The Mad Scotsman meets the Donkey.

(hint: OGSF and Yeknod)

Persephone

Errr... why's OGSF buggering that badger?

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by Persephone:

OK...I'll try this one again!

The Mad Scotsman meets the Donkey.

(hint: OGSF and Yeknod)

Persephone

Originally posted by Mace:

Now look at Yeknathod's, It even comes with built in protuberances.

Now THAT's a sporran!

Mace

No, its a wee spaniel in training to play Joe Shaw.

Yer see, yer grip the little begger (the spaniel, not Joe... one wouldn't want to blow into Joe in case it blowed back)... just want to make that clear.

Anyway, yer grip the wee, feisty spaniel and turn it upside down. Now, by selecting various combinations of legs yer can program yer initial setup options and yer opponent's moves. Now this is the interesting bit. There is a delay. Quite a long delay. Sometimes weeks. And then, all of a sudden, the spaniel starts to thrash around and snarl and then raise paws to semaphore turns. Ruddy amazin to watch!. Now the spaniel, see, doesn't understand "turns". So it's signalling is a constant flow of paws, snarls and the odd slap of a docked tail on the stomarch for special instructions. Now, the beast is so CM:BO-focused it doesn't know how to stop. So OGSF introduced a quick peck on the nostril to distract the beast - I think it meant "intruder" or "handsome German shepherd dog" or something. Anyway, by varying the pressure and length of blast other commands can be given - bit like yer delay commands but more complicated. And it makes a nice tune.

The spaniel, I understand, is being beta-tested with Joe. OGSF, swift and shiney boot, discussed the suitability of candidates at some length and at the time there was a certain dearth of SSNs. Now the spaniel is a bit "stressed", a bit of prima donna and is obviously an artist so, on first outing, an opponent of failing abilities was deemed suitable so as to build up confidence without being taxed too much. Joe was a bit borderline, but we managed to to program the spaniel with a -25 disadvantage to make things fair and give the beast a modest workout. This will be changed upwards for future opponents.

I think we all may need to give Joe as much encouragement and support during these trials... the Justicar losing to a prototype spaniel on minimum settings would be er, well... disasterous.

Yeknod o' tha Thistle

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by Persephone:

OK...I'll try this one again!

The Mad Scotsman meets the Donkey.

(hint: OGSF and Yeknod)

Persephone

Of course, those with a sharp eye for detail will have instantly noticed that one leg of the spaniel is longer than the others.

This is entirely reasonable because the beast has a pronounced limp and, if not carefully guided, has a tendency to walk around in circles. This, of course, is a good thing though I have to note my disappointment that it didn't take to thistles, despite me efforts.

Nevertheless, I was impressed and have certain tender affections for the animal and feel honoured that OGSF, swift and shiny boot, should make this introduction.

Yeknod o' tha Thistle

[Noba]

Rats. Pictures won't display. Nothing to see.

Noba

[ June 29, 2002, 03:17 AM: Message edited by: Noba ]

[Mace]

Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Anyway, yer grip the wee, feisty spaniel and turn it upside down.

I had a word with the sheep, and we all feel that this is something that could not only make you go blind and grow hairs on the palms of your hands, but also result in arrest and imprisonment.

Mace

[ June 29, 2002, 03:41 AM: Message edited by: Mace ]

[dalem]

[serious]

Hey folks, thanks to those who asked about my fate in the churning miasma that Worldcom has become. I made it through the layoffs today safely. Of course, "safe" in this case means I am free to experience the no doubt wild ride that is coming for us that remain and do understand GAAP.

Once my mood improves (a lot of my friends and coworkers got the axe today including the friend who recommended I apply for my job here 5 years ago and the manager who hired and mentored me) I'll stop fermenting my foul temper by poking at Aunty Jack in the General Forum and go back to posting annoying gamey updates, silly doctored song lyrics, and poetic raspberries here where the iron manhole covers grow.

Until then, "Pthbtt!"

[/serious]

[Yeknodathon]

Originally posted by Mace:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Yeknodathon:

Anyway, yer grip the wee, feisty spaniel and turn it upside down.

I had a word with the sheep, and we all feel that this is something that could not only make you go blind and make you grow hairs on the palms of your hands, but also result in arrest and imprisonment.

Mace</font>