Mace Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by OGSF: E'en Ah knoo tha' tha "Ootback Restuarant" as a clapboard piece o' Texas Steakhoose ****e wha widnae knoo a "bloomin' onion" fraim a hot damper. Noo bastarrrd ain Australia eats batter fried onions.Last year I sent the Outback Restuarant an email drawing their attention to the certain liberties taken regarding the meals and the lingo. I even offered to be their consultant for a price. Haven't heard back from them though. Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaylord Focker Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Outback is great because "there are no rules, just right". For some reason no one seemed to remember this when i took a boomerang off the wall and attacked one of their stuffed animal kangaroos from 20 yards away across two tables. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Gaylord Focker: Outback is great because "there are no rules, just right". For some reason no one seemed to remember this when i took a boomerang off the wall and attacked one of their stuffed animal kangaroos from 20 yards away across two tables.To whit: MY BOOMERANG WON'T COME BACK Charlie Drake - 1961 (Oom-yacka-wurka, oom-yacka-wurka, oom-yacka-wurka) In the bad backlands of Australia Many years ago, The aborigine tribes were meeting, Having a big pow-wow. (Oom-yacka-wurka, oom-yacka-wurka) "We got a lot of trouble, Chief, On account of your son Mack." "My boy Mack? Why, what's wrong with him?" DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back. "Your boomerang won't come back?" DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back, My boomerang won't come back, I've waved the thing all over the place, Practised till I was black in the face, I'm a big disgrace to the Aborigine race, My boomerang won't come back. DRAKE: I can ride a kangaroo (yeah yeah) Make kinkajou stew (yeah yeah) But I'm a big disgrace to the Aborigine race, My boomerang won't come back. They banished him from the tribe then And sent him on his way, He had a backless boomerang So here he could not stay. (Animal noises) DRAKE: [spoken] This is nice, innit? Getting banished at my time of life. What a way to spend an evening: sitting on a rock in the middle of the desert with me boomerang in me hand. I shall very likely get bushwhacked. (An animal roars; Drake shrieks back.) DRAKE: Get out of it! You nasty bushwhacking animal. Think I'll make a nice cup of tea. (Doing, doing, doing...) Good gracious! There goes a kangaroo. I must have a practice with me boomerang: hit him right behind the left earhole. Now then, slowly back. Gruff voice: If you throw that thing at me, I'll jump right on your head. (It chuckles and bounces away.) DRAKE: Innit marvellous? Got a land full of kangaroos and I had to pick that one. For three long months he sat there Or maybe it was four, Then an old old man in a kangaroo skin Came a-knocking at his door. "Well, I'm the local witch doctor, son, They call me George Alfred Black. Now tell me, what's your trouble, boy?" DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back. "Your boomerang won't come back?" DRAKE: My boomerang won't come back, My boomerang won't come back, I've waved the thing all over the place, Practised till I was black in the face, I'm a big disgrace to the Aborigine race, My boomerang won't come back. "Don't worry, boy, I know the trick, And to you I'm gonna show it. If you want your boomerang to come back, Well first you've got to... throw it." DRAKE: Ooh, yes! Never thought of that. Daddy will be pleased. Must have a go, nyuh-huh! Excuse me. Now then, slowly back... and throw. (Boomerang whizzes away; Sounds of a plane approaching and then falling from the sky.) DRAKE: Ooh my God! I've hit the flying doctor. Eee-hee-hee! Can you do first aid? Witch Doctor: Don't talk to me about first aid, boy, you owe me fourteen chickens, you know, when I learned you to throw the boomerang, you know, first things first. DRAKE: Yes, I know that, but I mean, I think on this occasion, you know, you could be a bit more perspective........... Now, tell me Gay Bored Flocker. Did yours come back? No? Re-read the instructions above from a different perspective, then. Tosser. AJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt! His name is my name tooooooooooooo! Report on recent Minneapolis area get together: Item the First) Lars apparently has mighty powers that let him manipulate the weather. A day that started out crappy became beautiful for boating. Item the Second) dalem the non-Minnesotan figured out that lake + September = cold at night. Seanachai the uberdubergnome and Papa Khann, both Minnesota natives, each figured a simple posing strap and a winning smile would be enough to guard against the chill Autumn shoulder of Mother Nature. Item the Third) The older blonde in the long coat was better scenery than the wriggly little one with the low pants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papa Khann Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by dalem: John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt! His name is my name tooooooooooooo! Report on recent Minneapolis area get together: Item the First) Lars apparently has mighty powers that let him manipulate the weather.Apparently all too true. Hint: Stay upwind of Lard at all times. Item the Second) dalem the non-Minnesotan figured out that lake + September = cold at night. Seanachai the uberdubergnome and Papa Khann, both Minnesota natives, each figured a simple posing strap and a winning smile would be enough to guard against the chill Autumn shoulder of Mother Nature.Glad you like my smile. I would also like to emphatically state that at no time during the evening did I smile at dalem. Item the Third) The older blonde in the long coat was better scenery than the wriggly little one with the low pants.Agreed. That is, as long as we're talking about those delightful female creatures on the dance floor. I thought for a moment there I caught you eyeing over Lard and SomeNachos (not that there's anything wrong with that). Papa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athkatla Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Without doubt OGSF you are one snivelling, dribbling, utter-rubbish-talking Jock! When you manage to work out how to exit this BB, send me a fecking turn.........got it you Scots Git!! And to all you noobies who managed to find your way here, read the rules then SOD OFF. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Without doubt OGSF you are one snivelling, dribbling, utter-rubbish-talking Jock! When you manage to work out how to exit this BB, send me a fecking turn.........got it you Scots Git!! And to all you noobies who managed to find your way here, read the rules then SOD OFF. Ahh. A post with SPIT...SPITE even. This place has gone to the namby-pamby dogs lately. No name calling worth mentioning. People like MrSqueeker(Question: Can a lawyer be classed as people ??) and his dribbling sig lines, about as good has his sniveling posts. ( I wouldn't expect any turns from him though. He's too busy billing people) Elvis and his "NICE" post.. Newbies who post, and run away giggling like pre-pubescent schoolgirls saying "I posted in the Peng Thread, look at me !" The mad OGGSF-f-f (Check your F-Troop reference), posting, supporting Australians ! Hiram , saying..."how can you tease me so ?" like some badly bullied first year tike. Well, I HAVN'T GOT THE GAME YET AND I AM OFF TO THE PREMIER WINE PRODUCING REGION OF OUR GREAT NATION NEXT WEEK AND NO DOUBT THE GAME WILL BE IN MY LETTERBOX ON MONDAY AND MY DAUGHTER WILL LAUGH AND PHONE ME TO LET ME KNOW ITS THERE, WHILST I'M HERE WHEELING THE WIFE AROUND THE WINERIES WHILST I COULD BE BACK IN PERTH PLAYING...... a little bit upset; i am. Sigh. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 To top it all off, Noba, it is Australian wine. Or should that be - 'what Australians make the English believe wine is'? I feel for you - well, I would, if you weren't Australian. So I actually just laugh at you while I cherish my copy of CMBB... With no manual at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Andreas: To top it all off, Noba, it is Australian wine. Or should that be - 'what Australians make the English believe wine is'? I feel for you - well, I would, if you weren't Australian. So I actually just laugh at you while I cherish my copy of CMBB... With no manual at all.Actually, you don't strike me as the sophisticated type Android. More the pig-swilling type. I doubt you would know which end of a wine bottle has the cork in it! Otherwise you would appreciate that FINE WESTERN AUSTRALIAN WINES are regarded extremely highly by sophisticated societies all over the planet. Don't worry if you can't spell sophisticated either. It wouldn't mean anything to you anyway. Oh and before you forget, I hope you don't contract that Eevil CD virus. You know - the one that eats the reflective layer of NEW CD's from the inside out, thus rendering the NEW CD DEAD!! But then again, you aren't playing with it are you? Just "cherishing" it. Whatever turns you on.. Pillock AJ [ September 21, 2002, 05:50 AM: Message edited by: AussieJeff ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by AussieJeff: To whit: MY BOOMERANG WON'T COME BACK Charlie Drake - 1961 Verses deleted for the sake of humanity "My Boomerang Won't Come Back" was the first 45rpm single I ever bought, at age 5. By age 5.5 I knew the words by heart, and by age 6 I thought it was irretrievably retro. It is eerily fitting that kindergarten-boy AJ still knows the words, but I blame him for the fact that some high-pitched little Aussie wanker shrieking "Oh my gawd, I've hit the flying doctor" will haunt my dreams once more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 It is eerily fitting that kindergarten-boy AJ still knows the words, but I blame him for the fact that some high-pitched little Aussie wanker shrieking "Oh my gawd, I've hit the flying doctor" will haunt my dreams once more. Except the missing fact that Charlie drake was/is a POM. Pillock. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Noba: Except the missing fact that Charlie drake was/is a POM. Who said anything about this Charlie Drake character? I was referring to AJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by AussieJeff: Otherwise you would appreciate that FINE WESTERN AUSTRALIAN WINES are regarded extremely highly by sophisticated societies all over the Australia. All two of them? Maybe, but then again I am not surprised that Ozzies think their wine is the best. I am even less surprised that the English believe them. Let's see - amount of Oz wine in Sainbury's? Tons. Amount of Oz wine in French hypermarché? None. I rest my case. You can always compete for the 'I wouldn't bring this wine to a party of people I hated most.' award with the Californians though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Rejoicing May Now COMMENCE! I am back ... yes indeed, I have braved the drive from Durango to Grand Junction (and heartily recommend it ... though for YOU lot I would recommend you try it in December during a howling snowstorm with slick tires) and thence to Glenwood Springs Colorado, TWO hops in a turboprop and three training sessions with glowing reviews from all participants and I return ... to THIS? Still the rules are adequate for all that Leeo wrote them (doubtless he had some homeless wino help him with the big words ... like manual) but we take what we can get I suppose. Hiram Sedai is back but then he was never really gone ... drat the luck. I can't understand how Lars, dalem, Seanachai and Papa Khann (the perpetual Squire) could have a Lake Minetonkatoy (whatever) get together without ME ... it must have been terrible for them ... {sigh} "So ... wonder what Joe is doing now eh?" I'm going to make a valiant attempt to get my email house in order ... not sure why though ... I'll just get more emails from YOU clowns and who wants that? Joe p.s. Where's my copy of CMBB? It's September 21st and since I pre-ordered I EXPECTED to have it on my doorstep by now. Besides ... it isn't right that the Germans get if first because ... we'll they're German aren't they! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 I am back ... All together now... GROAN. And we should be ...? [shudder]happy ?[/shudder] Havn't you got ANYTHING else to do ? Please ? Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by OGSF: Posted bah Boo feckin' Radley: "Even if you could, what makes you think he's even remotely edible? Oh...right. You're Ozztralian. If you can eat batter fied onions the size of your head, I guess anything's fair game." E'en Ah knoo tha' tha "Ootback Restuarant" as a clapboard piece o' Texas Steakhoose ****e wha widnae knoo a "bloomin' onion" fraim a hot damper. Noo bastarrrd ain Australia eats batter fried onions. Boot thain ye're fraim Ohio. Ye cannae bae expaicted tae knoo aboot much. WAS I TALKIN' TO YOU, JIMMY??? I don't think so, not that that would stop you from piping up, you haggis reaking, festering pile of ear wax! My Gawd, reading your posts is about as enjoyable as watching Paverotti doing squat thrusts in a Speedo, or watching David Crosby eat a McRib sandwich. How is it that you haven't been "whacked" yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hakko Ichiu Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Dragon Army: Oh crap, I'm in the cesspool! I betta gets the hell outta here before these psycos gang rape me. :eek: Rubber Gloves? Check. Manacles? Check. Astroglide™? Check. Donkey? Donkey? Yoohoo... Can someone check the paddock, please? Damn, the one time a cabana boy might come in handy. Large tureen of Sod Off!? Check. Gentlemen, start your engines. [ September 21, 2002, 01:20 PM: Message edited by: Hakko Ichiu ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Ethan, I heard you enjoyed your time in Zetten? Very good. Now Seanachai, I have finally given in to your pathetic post-card bullying, not because I hate you, no, because you got on my nerves, with your shrieking, wailing, girly 'send me a card' crap. So I did. Rest assured that it coming from me it will be the heights of tastefulness, and your postman will admire you for your selection of friends until the end of his career in your delivery district. To all Australians who still believe their country produces wine. No, it is not. It is Ribena with medicinal alcohol (that's the high-quality stuff) or Emu-piss added. Now sodd off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dogtoes Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Hi Mom! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papa Khann Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Dogtoes: Hi Mom!CanineDigits, your Mom wanted me to pass this little message along to you.... <big>Sod Off!</big> Papa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Ahh, be nice to the little fella, his mom bought him a computer and now he wants to say thanks. How sweet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Papa Khann Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Andreas: Ahh, be nice to the little fella, his mom bought him a computer and now he wants to say thanks. How sweet.Andre's *ss, being a pillock of the lowest order, this may have escaped your dwarfish intellect, but it just so happens that nice ain't in our vocabulary. Now run along back to your hole and design up some more Eastern front scenarios for us to play. There's a good lad. Papa Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athkatla Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Ok you useless gits, just because you got your copies of CMBB, there's no need to let this thread almost fall off the first page!! What's more, you, you silly skirt wearing, haggis eating, caber tossing pillock, you STILL haven't sent me a turn, and it's freaking Saturday!!! Pull your finger out laddie before I stick one of those cabers where the sun don't shine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andreas Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Papa Khann: Andre's *ss, being a pillock of the lowest order, this may have escaped your dwarfish intellect, but it just so happens that nice ain't in our vocabulary. Now run along back to your hole and design up some more Eastern front scenarios for us to play. There's a good lad. PapaI'm sorry, but who or better even, what are you. And do I want to know? Now troll off, and talk to some of the other sodding newbies festering in this thread, or annoy Joe, he is always up for a bit of brainless blather from the likes of you. You disturb my circles... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ales Dvorak Posted September 21, 2002 Share Posted September 21, 2002 Originally posted by Elvis: Love,ElvisNow that's un improvement. Regards Alice in Wonderland ( not nextdoor) [ September 21, 2002, 05:04 PM: Message edited by: Ales Dvorak ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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