God Save the Peng and this Honorable Challenge

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by Mace:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Boo_Radley:

The Australians are just waiting for some form of armegeddon so they can finally cast off their thin veneer of sanity, dress up like a bunch of coke-addled glitter rock holdovers and race around pointlessly through the desert in homemade vehicles that resemble nothing less than what the offspring of the mating of a turbo-charged drag racer and a circus wagon might look like.

Actually, we're more waiting to sit atop a bus that's travelling the outback, our long senquined evening dress fluttering in the breeze.

Mace</font>

[dalem]

Second page? Second Page????

Well, it's either go plant some grass seed in the back lawn or do the Game Update Dance.

Game Updates!!

MrSpkr: As expected, he continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play. In this lovely HexenKessel scenario he is clambering orc-like over the bodies of his dead to drag my stout heroes down from the battlements. I really really hope XXX Corps is getting close.

Boo: As expected, he continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play. Okay, he did that for about a turn and a half before he CRUSHED ME INTO THE DUST LIKE THE HAMMER OF SOME VENGEFUL GOD. Wow did I rack up a Loss.

Dorosh: After much wheedling of the scenario designer, M. Dorosh (what's his standing in the Pool again? Personally I vote he be given the title of Dressmaker to the Ladies of the Pool.) has finally seen fit to place his troopiewoopies and we have begun the exchange of turns. I suspect money changed hands earlier with said scenario designer so I imagine it will be a few turns before I can claim that he continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play.

Panzer Leader: But of course, he continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play. There were some iffy moments there, but I see this one wrapping up nicely for my Rifle company plus M8 HMCs, I do.

Leeo: The Pain is almost over for him. I have crossed the river and I have only a few more rounds to administer from The Lawgiver. He, it need not be said, continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play.

OGSF: I suspect that we have an imposter amidst us. Before The Mad Spittley One's "trip to the UK", his turns poured down from the sky like a divine yet sour Urine Stream of the Gods. (See above for Hammer reference.) Post "trip" it is reduced to a mere shake-off trickle that barely justifies covering the lands below in a rubber sheet of abasement.

Noba: Ahh, here was a battle to remember. Airborne! Tanks! Rifles! Fusiliers! StuGs! Artillery! Ahhhh... Still, when all is said and done, he continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play.

Wow. I'm getting too old to enjoy eating cookie dough straight from the tube.

[ June 23, 2002, 04:41 PM: Message edited by: dalem ]

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by The_Capt:

Any monkey with an organ can be a critic..why don't you stop trying to out-think me and instead jump on the bus...unless of course you missed the "second call" and perhaps should remain "tragically average".

As to what I am or am trying to do...heh well I am glad you have it all figured out. I have a story in there somewhere but it will probably take a few more years to get it out.

Rebellion against authority? Hell I am authority. Bottom line is mate, I am not trying to impress anyone. Do you not think I would like to be "normal", hell I envy "normal" every day. Normal people are happy and content because they do not see the cracks.

Yelp, ignore or praise...I really don't give a flying ****..I've been wrestling with this whirlwind for a long time and the ride ain't over yet.

But every critic with an organ, my dear Capt, is not a monkey. Trying to 'out-think' you? Hmm, perhaps I've been guilty of 'harshness' where you are concerned. Although I doubt it. Doubtless I will remain 'tragically average', but not for any reason you might come up with.

And no one wishes to be 'normal', except normal people, and they invariably go mad, kill the wife, and feed her to the cat over a period of several months.

Coventry has been called. I think, in this case, that the_Capt and I need to wrestle our various demons into submission before I can join in on such a call. Although I would take it as a personal favour if he would make a greater effort to avoid 'restricted' language.

These rules, Capt are not fussy. Had you been here during the last meeting of the Olde Ones and the Minnesota Contingent (kudos to Dalem and Lars for going to the bathroom in the bathroom, which is more than Peng and Berli were capable of in our first get together, and that family across the ally still set's their dog on me every time I try to make it to my car...) you would have heard language after your own, anarchistic heart.

But we, despite being the Peng Challenge, are still guests here.

Within the culture that I was raised in, being a host is a sacred duty, and being a guest requires a similar committment.

You can ask of Peng and Berli, Persephone and Joe Shaw, Dalem, Lars, and Shandorf whether I've attempted to be a good host when they've come to my hovel.

And, as a guest of BTS, I don't think it's weak-willed lackeyism to expect members of the Peng Challenge Thread to observe a certain courtesy and acknowledgement of our host's rules.

We bend, perforate, mutilate, and have a good slash on the rules far more than any other group on the Board would ever be allowed. But we're not discourteous, and we are not unappreciative.

Do you think I haven't had my own sessions of 'wrestling with the whirlwind'? Perhaps you and I can achieve a certain 'wisdom' together.

So, the_Capt, what shall we talk about next, eh?

[Boo Radley]

Originally posted by dalem:

Boo: As expected, he continues to writhe in the crushing grip of my superior play. Okay, he did that for about a turn and a half before he CRUSHED ME INTO THE DUST LIKE THE HAMMER OF SOME VENGEFUL GOD. Wow did I rack up a Loss.

Tis true, tis true. I told him that destroying that defenseless orpahanage on top of the hill would really mess with his karma, but did he listen? NOOOooooooo! Just shelled the bejeeses out of it, while inside all the little French orphans were running about trying to save their little pastries.

Sad, really.

But he just got what he deserved.

[rleete]

Way to go, old man! I am refering, of course, to my leige, Seanachai . Two (long winded, what else?) posts, and the newbie thread has been locked. Slapped him about the ears right good, he did. And the little weasle didn't even get it.

A classic verbal knockdown if I've ever seen one. Sheer poetry.

[Michael Dorosh]

Originally posted by dalem:

Dorosh: After much wheedling of the scenario designer, M. Dorosh (what's his standing in the Pool again? Personally I vote he be given the title of Dressmaker to the Ladies of the Pool.)

Seanachai yelled at me for being mean to Emma, so if I offer to measure the ladies' inseams, I am sure I will be in trouble. I sent you my setup, did I not???? EDIT - yes I did, I also read the reviews at the Depot, you cheeky devil! Of course, failing to best me in all our recorded matches - and the unrecorded ones - has no doubt driven you to desperation. My outnumbered, outgunned paltry few awate your elite hordes!

Edited to note that the word "awate" is actually Gaelic. I know, cause I made it up.

[ June 23, 2002, 09:33 PM: Message edited by: Michael Dorosh ]

[dalem]

Originally posted by Michael Dorosh:

I sent you my setup, did I not???? EDIT - yes I did, I also read the reviews at the Depot, you cheeky devil! Of course, failing to best me in all our recorded matches - and the unrecorded ones - has no doubt driven you to desperation. My outnumbered, outgunned paltry few awate your elite hordes!

And I sent you the turn back I believe.

[Michael Dorosh]

Originally posted by dalem:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Michael Dorosh:

I sent you my setup, did I not???? EDIT - yes I did, I also read the reviews at the Depot, you cheeky devil! Of course, failing to best me in all our recorded matches - and the unrecorded ones - has no doubt driven you to desperation. My outnumbered, outgunned paltry few awate your elite hordes!

And I sent you the turn back I believe.</font>

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by R_Leete:

Way to go, old man! I am refering, of course, to my leige, Seanachai . Two (long winded, what else?) posts, and the newbie thread has been locked. Slapped him about the ears right good, he did. And the little weasle didn't even get it.

A classic verbal knockdown if I've ever seen one. Sheer poetry.

Sigh.

It was never my intent, when I went there, to stifle the remarks of even so dismissive and arrogant a child as 'Seph'.

I remember a day, in spring, when I sat beneath a lemon tree with Torquemada. The tree was in full flower, and the petals floated down on us like gossamer.

Our discussion that day...nay, let us call it what it was, our 'argument', was the usual: the right of every individual to speak their mind.

Tomás was, as always, witty, urbane, and utterly amoral. He had just penned the order that would force 200,000 jews into exile, expelling them from the Kingdom of Spain.

As always, he was, with myself, utterly honest.

"Seanachai, my friend. And how are you today?"

"Well, your Grace."

"Good, good. Have one of these apricots, they are exquisite."

The fruit was tart, but succulent, with an aroma that made one think of bees in an orchard.

"You are right, your Grace, the flavour is superb."

"Yes. Superb." Spain's most Holy Grand Inquisitor sat quietly for several moments.

"Seanachai?"

"Yes, your Grace?"

Torquemada waved an impatient hand at my reply.

"Please: 'Tomás'. Just as you are 'Seanachai'. Must we go through this again?"

"Alright then, 'Tomás'."

"Good."

Petals floated down from the blossoms above us. One errant petal settled on his goatee, to be brushed gently away.

"Seanachai, do you ever feel pity for fools?"

"Always, your...always, Tomás."

"But would you spare them?"

"Indeed, Tomás, I would."

"But to what purpose? Why must we suffer fools?"

"Because, Tomás, we do not know that they are fools."

"Even when they open their mouthes and expose the empty, whistling cavern behind it? Even then?! When every word they speak makes the braying of an ass seem like the discourse of the Ancients?"

"Tomás, I would be the first to say that I have judged and abused my fellows badly because of what they've said. But I have often had reason, afterwards, to question my judgement, to consider their words, and to wonder how much the prejudice of my own perceived cleverness had to do with my dismissal of what they had to say."

We sat, quietly, for a while. The lemon tree arched over us. From a low branch several feet away hung a basket, and I realized it contained many small birds. Torquemada glanced up and noticed my attention. He smiled, then pursed his lips and whistled softly. A low whistling and piping rippled forth from the basket forming a melodic thrum of song that was both compelling and relaxing.

"Is it not fine? They have all been trained to sing different notes. A gift from the south. Purchased from a Moor in Algeciras, I am told. A clever people, the Moors. Many beautiful and elegant things will pass from the world when we have burnt them all."

"Must they all burn, Tomás?"

"I fear so, yes. Those who will not serve, must perish."

"And why must they serve?"

"It is their lot. They are unsuited for anything else, or we would not be having this discussion."

"Tomás, every individual has within themselves the answer to tyranny. Every man or woman has the right to speak up, and have their voice heard."

"Have you never spurned what someone else has to say? Haven't you dismissed people out of hand?"

the soft song of the birds rose suddenly as the breeze shifted, then resumed its even cadence. I sat and stared over the wall of the garden where we sat, at the sun that was dipping towards the horizon.

"Yes, Tomás, I have. And I will, doubtless, do so again. But I live now in a time when people are afraid; when, as in your time, they want simple assurances about complex ideas. When they want more to be right, than to be fair, and to be safe before anything else. When whatever might be done to those who are different from them matters nothing. I live in a time, you see, when even in jest we must build a consensus of righteousness."

He threw back his head, and began to laugh, albeit in a friendly way.

"Big words for a little man, 'garden gnome'! And so out of place! Will you post them in the Peng Challenge Thread?"

"Yes, Tomás, I will. And I will invite even those who despise me to a dialogue."

"And what will you achieve?"

"Well, at least I can hope to rally all right-minded folk to reject the 'Vegemite' song..."

And then I awoke.

My word on the topic is this:

Joe Shaw, Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread, shall have the right of saying 'yea, or nay' to the taking of Squires, that fools not introduce into the midst of the Folk those who neither honour it, nor support it, nor even understand it.

But that should even one of the Olde Ones, nor several of the Seniour Knights question the Justicar's actions, nor, in fact, should even one member of the Peng Challenge Thread in good standing question it, should any such veto pass unremarked and automatic.

I mean, this seems to be rather a no brainer. If we give Shaw this sort of automatic veto power, how long is it going to be before we're trying to cope with a fire at the Reichstag?

[Panzer Leader]

Seanachai, you really are the greatest. Don't ever go.

[Panzer Leader]

S., Do us a favor. Please go spread your wisdom into the "Give us a date!" thread, because I fear I feel the same way as the original poster, and need to be shown the error of my ways.

And another thing, O' Wise One (May I call you Jonathon Livingston Seagull? {that was a cleverly concealed barb, because JLS is a real puffin compared to you}) can we not partake in the Combat Mission again? I want to play you in a CM QB, can I send a set-up?

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Panzer Leader:

S., Do us a favor. Please go spread your wisdom into the "Give us a date!" thread, because I fear I feel the same way as the original poster, and need to be shown the error of my ways.

And another thing, O' Wise One (May I call you Jonathon Livingston Seagull? {that was a cleverly concealed barb, because JLS is a real puffin compared to you}) can we not partake in the Combat Mission again? I want to play you in a CM QB, can I send a set-up?

Jesus wept.

I had actually, already, and without seeing this post just gone over and gotten heavy-handed in the 'give us a date' thread.

I don't want to live anymore...

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by dalem:

Second page? Second Page????

Yep. Saw it hanging there in the last slot on the first page and said to myself, "Self, let it drop off and die."... and you revived it (that will be 3 Mondays in a row)

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

...when I sat beneath a lemon tree with Torquemada...

Oh I know where this is going Joe

[Berlichtingen]

Yep, it went the way I figured...

though my conversations with Tomàs are never that argumentative... we generally see eye to eye...

Nothing wrong with a nice fire...

[dalem]

Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by dalem:

Second page? Second Page????

Yep. Saw it hanging there in the last slot on the first page and said to myself, "Self, let it drop off and die."... and you revived it (that will be 3 Mondays in a row)</font>

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Berlichtingen:

Yep, it went the way I figured...

though my conversations with Tomàs are never that argumentative... we generally see eye to eye...

Nothing wrong with a nice fire...

Sigh.

Berli is always the one you see at the auto-da-fé selling toasting forks and sausages.

His sales pitch always begins with 'Please allow me to introduce myself...'

[chrisl]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

It was never my intent, when I went there, to stifle the remarks of even so dismissive and arrogant a child as 'Seph'.

You did a nice job on Mr. "Please, no responses longer than 50 words, because I'm a stupid git who obsessively uses the main gun on a Sherman 105 to try to blast the last remnants of some broken HQ unit that I'm too pathetic to even be able to identify, despite it being writ there at the bottom of the screen" He's got a Havermeyer complex (not referring to the one on the board, rather his namesake who stole the .45 from the dead man in Yossarian's tent and used little bits of snickers bars to lure mice into his tent, at which point he would turn on the light with a string tied from his finger to the light-pull and watch the expressions on the faces of the poor mice just before they vanished into a blast of fur and mouse guts as he shot them with the .45)

Despite all that, and the fact that you decided to turn to the dark side and try to switch to MSN, you are a broken footed lazy git who owes me a turn (or at least a surrender file and a little red hat).

Edit:

Oh, and by the way: I know when CMBB will be released. I'm going to a conference for 8 days at the end of august, and CMBB will be release about 15 minutes after I board the plane on Aug 21. All you refreshing monkeys will then get your orders (three copies each no doubt, and the deluxe edition with the foot massage for Shandorf, the little weasel) in and it will completely sell out, leaving me to order when I arrive home the 29th or so, at which point I will have to wait for them to get another set of CDs stamped and manuals printed and I'll have to wait 6 weeks longer than the rest of you. I won't be able to log in via phone because I'll be in Hawaii, where the phones are notoriously bad. How do I know all this? Because CMBO went gold the last time I went on travel close to a release date. I was up in Sunnyvale (not where Buffy lives, that's Sunnydale) for a meeting for a couple days and completely missed the night of the refreshing monkeys.

[ June 24, 2002, 12:25 AM: Message edited by: chrisl ]

[Papa Khann]

Originally posted by Seanachi:

--------------------------------------------------

Jesus wept.

I had actually, already, and without seeing this post just gone over and gotten heavy-handed in the 'give us a date' thread.

I don't want to live anymore...

--------------------------------------------------

Greetings. I'm a newcomer to this thread, but not to the CM forums. In the past I've breezed through the "Pengs" once or twice, mostly while trying to pinpoint the source of an unpleasant aroma.

So why do I stop long enough to post this time? Heck if I know. I guess I just wanted to share these few words with Seanachi, whose posts I have always found entertaining. That is, when I've been able to summon enough endurance and consume enough caffeine to finish reading them....

Seanachi, don't throw your life away so quickly. Life is valuable. Indeed, life is sacred (or so I hear). And more importantly, I haven't had an opportunity to play a game of CM against you yet.

So assuming you haven't made a pilgrimmage to the Lake Street bridge and aren't currently standing perched atop it, dangling your toes precariously over the edge and contemplating flinging yourself into the swirling brown waters below (or for that matter, if you are)... please consider postponing your suicidal ramblings long enough to scoop up the gauntlet I've just thrown at your feet (just be careful not to lose your balance when you bend over up there).

I propose a small to medium sized engagement with computer generated forces, so that whoever loses can blame it on the crap the AI doled out to them to use for the battle.

Papa

P.S.

If a challenge in this black hole of a post normally requires adherence to any forms or rituals that I have omitted due to my inexperience, please forgive my ignorance and attempt to enlighten me.

[AUSSIEJEFF]

HELP!!

I'm thinking of placing this ad in the local Cessrag - "Damned good thrashing WANTED!! Must be skilled in dark, nefarious practices relating to digital manipulation of CM PBEM files. No age limit. Please phone 999-9999 for a good time or post hasty response to 666 Berlichtingenstrasse within 3 months."

......or, in the words of the inimitable Ms Spears "Ooops, I did it AGAIN!!" .... WON {ptt-oooee} that is.

My psycho therapist Dolly The Sheep (thanks for the referral, Macey old chap) says all this WINNING is bad for my complexion and I have to agree. I'm now busting out all over - thanks to Pantie Lecher's paltry poltroons deciding to vacate our battle map at the end of turn 1!! All my men had time to do was to raise their arms in a friendly "wave goodbye" gesture, as the increasingly rare PL Merkin species disappeared back to the wilds.....

....and the sorry scoreline says it all ......

Sorry Lorak olde buddy, but the challenge of getting notch #7 on my Lossbow is taking on herculean proportions. Back to the ol' drawing board for this lil' black duck......

AJ

--------------------------

"To win once is an ab-baa-ration....

But to win all the time is just ...sick!!!"

Dolly The Sheep - Eminent Psycho Analyst

[ June 24, 2002, 01:25 AM: Message edited by: AussieJeff ]

[AUSSIEJEFF]

Originally posted by Papa Khann:

Originally posted by Seanachi:

--------------------------------------------------

Jesus wept.

I had actually, already, and without seeing this post just gone over and gotten heavy-handed in the 'give us a date' thread.

I don't want to live anymore...

--------------------------------------------------

Greetings. I'm a newcomer to this thread, but not to the CM forums. In the past I've breezed through the "Pengs" once or twice, mostly while trying to pinpoint the source of an unpleasant aroma.

So why do I stop long enough to post this time? Heck if I know. I guess I just wanted to share these few words with Seanachi, whose posts I have always found entertaining. That is, when I've been able to summon enough endurance and consume enough caffeine to finish reading them....

Seanachi, don't throw your life away so quickly. Life is valuable. Indeed, life is sacred (or so I hear). And more importantly, I haven't had an opportunity to play a game of CM against you yet.

So assuming you haven't made a pilgrimmage to the Lake Street bridge and aren't currently standing perched atop it, dangling your toes precariously over the edge and contemplating flinging yourself into the swirling brown waters below (or for that matter, if you are)... please consider postponing your suicidal ramblings long enough to scoop up the gauntlet I've just thrown at your feet (just be careful not to lose your balance when you bend over up there).

I propose a small to medium sized engagement with computer generated forces, so that whoever loses can blame it on the crap the AI doled out to them to use for the battle.

Papa

P.S.

If a challenge in this black hole of a post normally requires adherence to any forms or rituals that I have omitted due to my inexperience, please forgive my ignorance and attempt to enlighten me.

Some enlightenment?? No problem .....

Try this ... <BIG><BIG>SOD OFF!!

</BIG></BIG> or how's about this ...

<BIG><BIG><BIG>*BOOT*</BIG></BIG></BIG>

Consider yerself enlightened....

AJ BScE

(Berli School of EEvil<SUP>tm</SUP>)

[Papa Khann]

Originally posted by AussieJeff:

--------------------------------------------------

Some enlightenment?? No problem .....

Try this ... SOD OFF!!

or how's about this ...

*BOOT*

Consider yerself enlightened....

AJ BScE

(Berli School of EEviltm)

-------------------------------------------------

Eh, what's this? Did someone say something (of import, that is)?

For a moment there I thought I heard something, but whatever it was seemed to be buried in surface clutter. It came through mostly as an annoying series of buzzes and clicks. White noise, more or less.

Papa

[dalem]

I hear my next squire grunting & hissing around here.....

(Edited because I love to edit)

[ June 24, 2002, 02:16 AM: Message edited by: dalem ]

[Goanna]

Might as well and say yes to this one Bard and be done with it. Put him on your list so to speak. Dropped in to te oblivion of people who you owe turns to will suffocate him for sure.

And don't think we haven't spied you scurrying in chrisl, you syphalitic lab rat. Got frozen fruit down to a "science" yet. You're going down a blind alley mate, we aussies have already sorted out that teleportation gig last week and will be selling it to you yanks for half price by the time you have a prototype ready. Best you waste more time on the whole GUT thing. I am sure you can get a government grant or somefink.

[Berlichtingen]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

His sales pitch always begins with 'Please allow me to introduce myself...'

True, true... and I make a Hell of a lot more sales than the competition