Guest Wildman Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 So now I'm to dance for your amusement like Demi Moore sliding down a pole with thigh-high leather boots on. Hey, I like the Demi Moore picture, but I find the Boots a little chaffing. While I have no problem stuffing the Rat down the nearest hole and dumping and blowing up 500lbs of Ammonium Nitrate on his pointy head. I'm sure as hell not going to do it because some ASS with his head so far up a polar bear decides that he is the be-all, end-all of the Cess. Now the dancing and playing of newbie, I'm sure brings some sick, perverted pleasure to those whose wrinkled flesh has been soaking in the Cess for thousands of posts. I mean your here aren't you, so such illicit, disgusting, and dare I say, Naughty escapades are to be expected. <-smacks Meeks with a large cricket bat> I'll not submit to your disgusting, pathetic attempt to start a show were you can sit back and pull your pud and moan like a 12yr old who just discovered what that fleshy appendage is for. However, for the entertainment of the Pool-at-Large, (and because I'm obviously sick too), let the beating and humping of StevetheRat begin. --- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wildman Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 My disgust and hatred of Meeks was so great that the server spilled it into two posts. So carry on, nothing to see here. --- [This message has been edited by Wildman (edited 01-12-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 Ok, so that one in ring. Smellslikearat, are you game, or just gamey? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Polar Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 I see meeks, so do you go beyond buggering sheep? Or have you settle into a niche? ------------------ "I had no shoes and I cried, then I met a man who had no socks." - Fred Mertz Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Golem: Pawbroon sucks my ass Pseudointellectual Cesspool oldtimer So bite me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Dang! It's creative of you. And that BITE ME proposal his so decadent. So European... As I said to Stench's wife while I was boinking her, Being French is a public service. Now I'd rather kick you in some undignified parts but there's so many of them I'm quite stuck. ------------------ You are not Obsessive-CMpulsive, you are Allied-Retentive. Mark IV Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 12, 2001 Share Posted January 12, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Wildman: ...where you can sit back and pull your pud and moan like a 12yr old who just discovered what that fleshy appendage is for.....let the beating and humping ..... ---<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Scab! Scab! Wait until the union hears about that! That's my job, that is! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jshandorf Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 If these two nimrods are gonna duel for our pleasure then I say that they should have to submit their movies to Lorak so that we can all download them from the Pool and enjoy the fun also. ------------------ I once killed a six pack just to watch it die. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wildman Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Sick, sick man. Know I know your one of those people who make the bottom of the peep show booth stick for Marlow. Shame, SHAME!!! --- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seanachai Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by dalem: Not exactly a sonnet, but he's of low-enough character that a limerick is just his speed. Thank you. I hope that hurt you all as much as it hurt me.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I'm sorry, Dalem, but like Hiram, we will have to add you to the list of people that are not permitted to versify within the 'Pool. Refrain. Do not post any other attempts at poetry, for any reason. English can be quite a lovely and poetic language in the proper hands, but even if we dip your hands in lye for several weeks, they will not come clean enough to work in verse. If you're nice about this, we'll get your dogs ears back from Croda and help you staple them back on. ------------------ Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties, Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices! But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli, All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother! We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more, We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 ****A PUBLIC SERVICE NOTICE**** *AHEM* Lorak: enter this one if you please Mace: Allied Major Victory Stuka: Now truamatised and reduced to bed wetting Score Mace: Yanks 80 casualties/25 kia 1 mortar destroyed points 76 Stuka: Krauts 162 casualties/33 kia/4 captured 1 mortar destroyed 2 guns destroyed self esteem destroyed points 24 and now for some much deserved personal gloating ---> Stuka: I would rather the Mask of Shame or the bees than the drumming I just gave you! Mace [This message has been edited by Mace (edited 01-12-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PawBroon: Dang! It's creative of you. And that BITE ME proposal his so decadent. So European... As I said to Stench's wife while I was boinking her, Being French is a public service. Now I'd rather kick you in some undignified parts but there's so many of them I'm quite stuck. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Oh that's right, you're one of the French ones. You know, I was in France last fall, and I remember having a good time. I guess you must not have been close by. Unless you were the guy who left the Home Pregnancy Test in my hotel room bathroom. Can't thank you enough for that. Relax, by the way, it was negative. The only parts of me that are undignified are the ones I use to interact with the spotty likes of you; specifically, my ossified toejam residue, with which I hesitantly peck at the keyboard when I'm addressing Frenchmen. (For Aussies I use frozen smegcicles - I respect them a little more.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: I'm sorry, Dalem, but like Hiram, we will have to add you to the list of people that are not permitted to versify within the 'Pool. Refrain. Do not post any other attempts at poetry, for any reason<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Hey, Sunshine, the only poetry of mine you're qualified to critique is the kind I just made in my throne room - the kind of "I had too much Kentucky Fried Chicken for lunch" poetry that assaults so many of your senses that you wish the Colonel himself had never been born. But since you foolishly admit that my verse is to you what the red sun of Krypton is to Superboy, I will continue. Ahem. There once was a boy called Sunshine Guys at the bar thought he was just fine Bad poetry Made him weak in the knee But his favorite movie's Enemy Mine Thank you, thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marlow Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Seanachai: If you're nice about this, we'll get your dogs ears back from Croda and help you staple them back on. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE> I doubt Croda the Amazing Dog Eared Boy is going to part with them. He has become quite attached to them, since I have removed his own ears. WildMary, Since StevetheRatTurd has not responded in a timely manner, the battle will be winging its way to you this evening. I'll leave it to you to work out the details with your less than esteemed opponent. That said, there are certain rules of engagement for your little tete-a-tete: 1. Updates are to be posted regularly to the 'Pool by both parties. Make it funny, insulting, etc … or else we send Croda after your pets. 2. No pooftas 3. The loser of the battle will use a signature that is selected by a committee of three pool regulars (Squires or Kaniggets) until he defeats one of the same. 4. There is no rule 4. Anyone else have conditions to add? ------------------ This message brought to you by Marlow's Salvage and Wrecking Service, Proud Sponsor of The Cesspool formerly The 'Meeks currently exists as Polar Bear excrement' Memorial Thread [This message has been edited by Marlow (edited 01-12-2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Marlow wrote: > Anyone else have conditions to add? No kissing or petting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Mild(wo)man, Elisa & Co. Are you sure you want to publicly shame yourselves? Think twice, because the announcement of my victory will not confine itself to these petulant walls. If still wish to continue, I await in my lair. therat@thelair.co.uk Pansies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stevetherat Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 "or else we send Croda after your pets" My pet has just had a bout of the squirts. If you would like to get your piece browned, Croda, go ahead. Mind you, he has been eating his deposits lately. Get used to a higher octave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 oh, and my haiku, just to show I can be as cultured as the next drongo: German's charging Stoic Yanks 'With regrets' letters to Mutter Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Aitken Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 stevetherat wrote: > My pet has just had a bout of the squirts. [...] Mind you, he has been eating his deposits lately. Can someone please remind me what pets are for? Mess-cleaning training for having children? Discussion topic for people fascinated by bodily functions and embarrassing ailments? Memory aid so that you'll know if you've done your yoga because you'll be covered in shedded hair? Channel for surplus cash which pet food manufacturers and veterinarians can surely make better use of? Geez, if you wanted a small furry animal to molest you could just buy a stuffed one – far cheaper and cleaner, and the cops don't show up if you get carried away. ------------------ 1) My troops ran out of the building as it was being damaged and got slaughtered! I'm angry! 2) Hey! My troops stayed in the building as it got damaged and got slaughtered! I'm angry! – Mr. Clark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Check6 Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mace: oh, and my haiku, just to show I can be as cultured as the next drongo: German's charging Stoic Yanks 'With regrets' letters to Mutter Mace<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> That is most definitely not a haiku. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forever Babra Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 All right, you huddled masses and wretched refuse. Matches against Bastables & JD are gearing up. Topplements to follow. Herr Oberst and I will never finish ours unless he can up the file returns to more than one every two weeks. A month into our game and I'm ready to view the first movie... ------------------ \\''||''// ( .) ( .) -----ooOOo---( )---oOOoo----- Kilroy was here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hamstersss Posted January 13, 2001 Author Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by stevetherat: Talking about his pet's ****. Seriously, folks, that's what this guy considers worth posting to the pool. Mind you, he has been eating his deposits lately. Get used to a higher octave.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> Higher octave? Octave??? Sweet sister Mary, you don't have two IQ points to rub together, do you? Do you seriously think that a dog or cat or marmot or whatever creature you possess, is going to sing any better because it eats its own ****? What is wrong with you, man? What two-bit sanitarium did they loose you from? And yes, I mean loose, not lose, for no one would miss such a pathetic specimen of craposity as yourself. No doubt some twisted, mad scientist created you from all the worst parts of Marky Mark, Vanilla Ice and Pee-Wee Herman. Once again, I need to now read passages from Thucydides so as to remove the numbness caused to my brain after reading your post. You are a stupid man, not fit to be made into dog food. ------------------ The Thin Red Line doesn't deserve to lick the sweat from my balls let alone demand the cash I would lay down for the DVD version. Seesh. The movie was lame-o! With a capital Hiram. -Shandorf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 Wankers. ------------------ What do we do with a terrible liar? Well, Great liars we send into the clergy. Good liars we groom for politics. Moderate liars we supply with sherrif's badges and guns, and the bad liars, well, we make them heroin whores. So what the hell do we do with the Terrible Liars? Well, it seems we turn them into physicists called "chrisl." Peng Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GI Tom Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 There once was a Peng from Nantucket, Who had a Thread so long he could suck it, His Inner Croda roared, His Lower Senachi chored, And many Peng Thread Readers said "**** it". Now THAT is poetry. Leave it to a Business Major to put simplicity back into the whole damned thing. Haiku's?? Bah, that is for just the really dumb cesspoolers. All cool cesspooler's can make their poems rhyme, like me. Besides, limerick's are way cooler and easier. GI Tom ------------------ To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark IV Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 More adventures in literacy with GITommy. Oh, boy. Define "chored". Limericks are supposed to scan. If you can't write a proper limerick, you probably can't dance, ride a bike, or remove earwax successfully, either. "Limerick's" with an apostrophe before the "s" indicates possession, not plurality. Your poetic license is hereby revoked. Now since you're a business major, communications skills will be of no real use to you in life anyway, especially with your ears full of earwax, so feel free to ignore this. The fact that you continue to post here shows that your parents are too drunk to place the trigger safety lock on the old keyboard. Again. This is a golden opportunity for a semi-literate marketeer to launch an MLM scheme from their 'puter before they wake up, and the time you spend here is time and money wasting, lad. I should apologize now for our previous episode with relative pronouns, as it was clearly a case of casting pearls before swine, though having annoyed Geier certainly justifies the effort expended. Perhaps follow the example of Elvis, and eke out a mere pair of spiteful syllables per iteration of the Peng Thread, to keep your hat in the old ring without your rather substantial risk of embarassment. Later dewd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GI Tom Posted January 13, 2001 Share Posted January 13, 2001 <BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mark IV: More adventures in literacy with GITommy. Oh, boy. Define "chored". Limericks are supposed to scan. If you can't write a proper limerick, you probably can't dance, ride a bike, or remove earwax successfully, either. "Limerick's" with an apostrophe before the "s" indicates possession, not plurality. Your poetic license is hereby revoked. Now since you're a business major, communications skills will be of no real use to you in life anyway, especially with your ears full of earwax, so feel free to ignore this. The fact that you continue to post here shows that your parents are too drunk to place the trigger safety lock on the old keyboard. Again. This is a golden opportunity for a semi-literate marketeer to launch an MLM scheme from their 'puter before they wake up, and the time you spend here is time and money wasting, lad. I should apologize now for our previous episode with relative pronouns, as it was clearly a case of casting pearls before swine, though having annoyed Geier certainly justifies the effort expended. Perhaps follow the example of Elvis, and eke out a mere pair of spiteful syllables per iteration of the Peng Thread, to keep your hat in the old ring without your rather substantial risk of embarassment. Later dewd.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE> MarkyMark, when oh when will you come to realize I have no shame? As early as Cesspool 1 I thought I made it quite clear. I am the minority, uneducated, lowerclass poster. I bring a balance to this thread. If all of you uppity, learned folks were only here, and I wasn't, who would you correct? Each other? I think not kind sir. My post was nothing short of pure, poetic justice, and you know it. And it's K33L Dewd to you mister. GI Tom ------------------ To a New Yorker like you, a hero is some type of weird sandwich. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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