Lars

Dumb 2nd Lieutenants...

Yeh, and Ford, I paid for the truck, so why do I need a stinkin key? Just tell me what wires to cross in the owners manual.

GAME UPDATE Bambi – 1 Lars – 0 frickin overmodeled spotting, non-tiring while sneaking, uber sound contact using, pink bitmap modded gamey bastages... Ah well, that's why they call it hunting, not finding. Turns out later. SSN Hint Of The Day: Tailgate the elderly. Now sod off.

Haven't even climbed into my stand yet and blood has been spilt.... SITREP FROM THE FRONT It was a tranquil scene below the Seelow Heights, not a nazi bastige to be seen. The Rooski's best moved forward to reinforce the remnants of their troops holding the small town on the wide open plain below the Heights. Suddenly, a KING TIGER appears. He is on overwatch duty while a troop of Halftracks filled with Stormtroopers are racing for the village. The King Tiger, from its commanding position 1100 meters away, proceeds to destroy anything it sees. The few surviving T-34's, totally outclassed and with no chance of a kill at that distance, seek shelter in any little fold of ground they can. The King Tiger, like some prehistoric monster of old, senses the fear among the cowering T-34's and moves forward down the hill to finish them off. The T-34 commander sees his chance. It's this or die in place. Forward lads! Forward!!! He sends the survivors of the platoon at full speed to the village where they will have cover behind the buildings. Three make it. The rest become Heroes of the Soviet Union. The finest representatives of the proletariat then proceed to run amok amidst the uberHalftracks like dingos among emus, knocking them all out and shooting the stuffing out of the sausage-eating fascists inside them. The Nazi tank commander wails and gnashes his teeth. He realizes his mistake in moving off his commanding position with the King Tiger and down into the gully where he was not able to fire. Hoping to redeem himself, he kicks the Porsche into high gear and runs for the town to save the pitiful scrapings of his troops. He rounds the corner of a building and closes to within 10 meters of a T-34. The gunner carefully aims the massive 88mm gun at the upper turret armor of the T-34. The gunner fires. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . A piercing scream that would do a 12 year old little girl proud fills the air. Yes, the mighty German high velocity 88mm shell has shattered on the fine Communist-built front turret armor. At 10 meters. Meanwhile, one of the T-34's companions buggers the King Tiger from behind. The dispirited Kraut reinforcements see this and fling down their arms and surrender. Never mind that they are still in their truck transports and could flee. They can see the writing on the wall. Lorak, take note!!! Final score: Lars – Major Victory OGSF – Big Girl's Blouse Now I'm outta here to go move some of Nature's creatures a little closer to God. Till Wednesday then, SOD OFF!

Nidan, you just haven't been paying attention again. ***BOOT*** You need something that sheep aren't afraid of. I suggest trying to find out what Mace uses for aftershave.

Nah, you're supposed to put the back legs in your waders and then push the critter up to a cliff edge. Or so I've been told.

Bloody hell, even the sheep in Australia are drunks... SSN Hint Of The Day: Leave a wet lollipop on the new sofa. Now sod off.

Hey, I remember that one! Fun little game. I don't remember the particulars though. You can't get it to run in a DOS shell?

Ate too many jalapenos again? SSN Hint Of The Day: Peel out. Now sod off.

Refresh my memory...what's the hubbub about these red uni folks?</font>

Oooooh, kinda like that Indian in the "Don't Litter" campaign from the 70's. What a metaphor, Joe's saying SSN's are garbage! Very deep. I always giggled about that one as I tossed my empty out the window. Can I throw Nidan1 at Joe?

Call in a Stuka.

hahahaha...ha...ha...heh...whew... Curse you Joe, you made me look. And all you uberFinns shut up, I know already.

Not that kind of forum. Does this Nidan thing belong to anyone?

And yet, you still won't go away...

Peacefully quiet?

You're welcome to try it. Myself, I always hunt on the other side of the hill.

Yourself excepted, obviously. I shall put you on the short list with Mike.

Wuss.

O.K. Hortlund, I realize you are Eurotrash and, therefore, have lost your yarbles and aren't allowed to go hunting, so stick with me here and I will explain it to you. Say you were going out to hunt "The Ghost of the Woods", a critter with the sharpest sense of hearing, sight and smell there is. Would you want to go reeking like the bar floor you fell down on the night before? Do you want to stink of that smelly fish you had for lunch? Of course not! You need to smell like something else! What you need is to smell like something that lives in the woods. Something that a whitetail deer isn't afraid of. Hmm, what could we use... "Why not use deer urine?!", you ask. ***BOOT*** Because then one horny, in-the-rut buck will be looking directly at YOU, you idjit! The moment you bring up your rifle, he'll be gone! "How about a porcupine? I could rub that all over myself!", you say. ***BOOT***, ***BOOT***, ***BOOT*** "Err, how about weasel piss? They live in the woods!", you say. ***BOOT*** Because we want to go hunting THIS season! You know how many weasels it's going to take to get a bottle of urine? "O.K., o.k., we'll do it your way", you say. ***BOOT*** Oops, sorry... Exactly! Good lad, you're learning. A meat eating critter so the urine will be rather rank and cover your scent, produces lots of urine, roams the woods, and whitetail deer are not afraid of it because, unlike a wolf or coyote, it doesn't eat DEER. Red Fox Urine fits the bill rather nicely doesn't it? Plus, the leftover fox piss is good for squirting down the heat vent of your cousin's truck. SSN Hint Of The Day: Ask people how much they make. Now sod off.

$4.95 a bottle, can you believe it? Then the dork behind the counter hands me a receipt. Like, what? I'm going to know if it's bad?

Aha! I knew you were Stalin’s Organ! I will deal with you when I return from deer hunting next week. I shall spend four days sitting in a tree plotting the perfect gamey QB. With a fox urine cover scent. Until then, consider yourself Challenged!

Other than OGSF, who’s not going to be very happy when he gets his, everybody now owes me a frickin turn. In fact, if I wasn’t still giggling over OGSF’s file, I’d be most upset.

See Boo? SEE? It's not that easy to get the Rules right so they don't post, is it?

How about a screenshot?