Speedbump Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by dalem: Any size, any side, any terms. I need a whuppin'.<hr></blockquote> I care not to know what you do on your own time, behind closed doors. There is such a thing as too much information! When I get my @#^$%& computer back up, you will receive a setup, oh gamey one... Speedbump [Edited because unlike Andreas, I do not use MS Word to do my spellchecking...] [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: Speedbump ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Croda: Coincidently, I am giving you one right now. How d'ya like them apples?<hr></blockquote> I'd need a turn from you to really evaluate that. Speaking of turns... Did I crush Lawyer into tiny little attorney bits and sweep him under the rug? Oh yeah. Did it take 6 months and 43 turns for him to see the light and surrender to me? Oh yeah. Was the scenario a) gigantic and almost unmanageable, and heavily skewed towards the Defender (yours truly)? Oh yeah. Does any of the above make my victory any less sweet? Oh no. I win, Lawyer lost, and that's the way it should be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 It is with sadness and trepidation I announce my return..(to deafening silence no doubt.) Most of you have forgot, some never knew. Oh well. Blame Seanachai.....he's always good to blame, the bastard. Where else do vague literary allusions get recognized and returned. So like Hepatitis C or Herpes we are never really ever cured of the infection. And like a good train wreck, we keep watching...... So where to start..Hiram My best to you and your sister. Both my kids were C-section. Expect the grumpiness to continue a bit. Certainly honorary Dame and Squirette are well vouched! I see we have a newer cast of characters, well until I get to know you I shall ignore you, once I know you I shall continue to do so. So in my absence, play has continued in the silent reaches of rune's hoary visions, Shaw has fallen in combat (and apparently is awol?) Moriarty has also collasped in losers disgrace to my onslaught. crisl continues to show why Monty failed in MarketGarden in XXX Corps Breakout, and Aqua Perdido would long have been vanquished is he'd return a file at a rate of more thean one a month (and that only because of his medication was working) Then there is fair Seanachai Bard and petulent and perpetual thorn in my side. Suffice to say that I hate and depise him. For he has obviously made a pack with Beelzebub himself. A man who has NEVER managed a win against me, who 3/4 the way thru our game was embracing Mme. Defeat as only a lover can, suddenly managed to, singly and in pairs, destroy the vast bulk of my forces. Where hidden PzIV's abide silently for the unspecting M4 to venture forth, drawing their aim over open bore sights, only to miss and be consigned to Valhalla from a return shot on the move. Where flamethrowers destroy his squads, except for the crazed lone bazooka man who belly crawls until the brewing up of my legions occur. Where I plummnet from 78% victory to barely able to scrape together the forces to tie their shoes. I mena, come on this Seana-chia here, the pet we all abuse. So thus some dark and befouling presence looms over the land, and changes the path of history. Kind of looks like the legal profession has grown a bit thin here. I assume MrSpkr hasn't managed to pull him self from behind, er pass the bar? So like the old warhorse, old is the operant condition, I shall er where was I? Old friends I see are back. Young'uns wet behind the ears they were, Marlow, Croda, Iskander Ahh I knew them when. Yes, Croda you pusillanimous misbegotten runt of a toad. Running out like that and leaving me holding the bag, a spinster at the altar on our Battallion level game. Oh I remeber you. And the others, oh I remember and long have I nursed wounds of pain and rejection into white hot paths of neural angst. To return here and rive your souls from your shackeld forms..... [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: jd ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: I will accept the next 10 challenges leveled by anyone against me here in the Mutha Beautiful Thread<hr></blockquote> Spot the hidden flaw - there's nothing in there that says I can't challenge you AGAIN, just to rub salt into the raw, suppurating and gangrenous wound. Thinks... if this were a Hollywood movie, and the hero has just found a loophole in the devil's pact, that must mean we're about to get to the bit where the devil reveals it wasn't a loophole after all, and something horrible happens... Ooops. I hope it doesn't involve Bauhaus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Lars: OGSF, we all know the reasons Scots wear kilts. As a Scotsman can’t hold his liquor long enough for it to do him any good, he needs quick access to his wee little unit so he can pee against the walls of Edinburgh. Scots also enjoy a fresh breeze blowing up their bum as they have yet to install a toilet paper dispenser on said walls of Edinburgh. Yet I give them credit for the cunning dodge of making the amusing peccadillo of cross-dressing a national “tradition” and thereby acceptable in public. <hr></blockquote> I present to you, the cross-dresser of the Cesspool and his wee spaniel. Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 Fair Patch I have returned, PROVISIONALLY, to further discuss the terms of my permanent return to this thread and to the office of Justicar of the Peng Challenge Thread. I do this out of respect for our hosts on the SimHQ board who, frankly, have enough to deal with without further off-topic posts. I also do it at your request, frequently stated, that I return. We shall see, by the reaction to this post, if others concur in your desires. You have asked me to return to the MBT and to take up my duties as Justicar. In return you have promised to fashion a Squadron Patch for Air Cess. That, in and of itself, is fair enough and indeed does YOU credit. Would that I could say as much for ALL members of your family. IF I should return to the MBT, certain changes would have to enacted. I note with approval and thanks the offer of Seanachai to take a more active role in the enforcement of the rules and procedures of the CessPool. I further acknowledge and approve of the widening of the governing body to include additional Seniour Knights of the CessPool (I am, I admit, mystified as to the inclusion of Simon Fox but there you have it). The, dare I use the word ... why yes, I believe I do ... Tyranny of certain Olde Ones, must needs be reined in or anarchy will ensue. These steps are good as far as they go. HOWEVER ... (1) The unjust and evil persecution of those of us who have formed an IL-2 Squadron under the name of Air Cess MUST CEASE! TEN members of this body are ALSO members of Air Cess, yet none of them were chastised (except for Lawyer and he really doesn't count since no one can stand him anyway). In return we agree to keep mention of the Squadron to a bare minimum here on the MBT, and indeed it has always BEEN at a minimum save for a short invitation before we had a home of our own. (2) I was singled out for abuse and calumny of the vilest sort and I was threatened with the removal of my office. It was even alleged that my actions had violated the very soul of the Justicariate and one of the Olde Ones went so far as to propose that the office be given, without trial or examination of the evidence, to OGSF. My office MUST be reinstated without prejudice and my record confirmed as the primary defender of the traditions of the CessPool. (3) One of the Olde Ones has issued a blanket invitation to one and all, outerboarders, SSNs, any vile beggar from off the street, to play a game of CM. Now it has ALWAYS been the stance of the Justicariate that a Knight may play whomever they wish ... and they may NOT play whomever they wish. This opening of the floodgates, however, puts into grave peril the status of SSNs within the CessPool. The current ranking system and promotion schedule of the CessPool MUST be confirmed and acknowledged before further damage is done. If this keeps up SSNs may think they have a right to be here ... {shudder}! Do these things, by public notice of a majority of the Olde Ones, and I shall return and take up my duties. Do them not ... and none of you shall return to England aliv ... opps, sorry, got carried away. In the absence of Peng I shall accept the public acknowledgement of Goanna as the Olde Australian in his stead. There needn't be a long winded speech of acceptance, a simple Aye to each of the three points will suffice. I await your answer. Joe [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: Joe Shaw ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leeo Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 Look! Joe Just-a-plane Shaw is back!! <big>*(Wild Applause!)*</big> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 Jdmorse is here. Does this mean that D.C. Lawyer will go away? We have a real lawyer in the house. Welcome back, jd! Know that I still abhor your visage the way a heroin addict hates the poh leese. You are a festering chancre sore dipped in dog vomitus dropped in a bag of horse offal on the back of a truck of decomposing bodies from a leper colony. That is the same truck that drove through Los Angeles and was expectorated upon by each and every backward citizen of your rancid state. Am I bitter from all of those losses? You bet your pale, flabby, geriatric, overpaid, pampered ass!! Have I learned anything more about CM since you cravenly cheated like a two bit whore at a Skip Bo game for a vial of crack cocaine and 5 bucks to go down to the local 7-11 for a pack of smokes? I’m not saying. If you are feeling up to it, then you may send a setup my way. I’m currently engaged in a spankathon with Croda (may his tongue fall out from singing too many Rasta man songs) and Elvis (may Beano be his companion to show some mercy in this cold cruel world) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: One of the Olde Ones has issued a blanket invitation to one and all, outerboarders, SSNs, any vile beggar from off the street, to play a game of CM.<hr></blockquote> Trust a failed Justicar to twist the facts. The invitation was specifically limited to Squires, Serfs and SSNs; the Old Ones are not so stupid as to risk playing vile beggars off the street. They might lose, for heaven's sake. May I also register my astonishment that a certain bloated old gasbag has managed to survive for so long in "Air Cess". I would have thought that his zeppelin-like bulk would be easy pickings as he wallows in the clouds, but clearly he is able to generate hot air at a faster rate than it leaks through the multiple bullet-holes in his Squadron-Patch'ed skin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 Hiram I would consider it an honor as my first official game back in the pool to eviscerate, ruminate, pontificiate and bitch slap you up the side o' your cranky assed head in a manly and civil game. Any preferences on your method of dispatch? Ahh, hell's bell's Joseph what the Sam Hill has been going on here since my sabbatical. Get your candy ass back in here, pick up your mantle and quit your whining. You are the Once and Future Justicar always were, always will be. Take advice from a 'simple country lawyer', you will always be hated, despisd and outcast, but such are the burdens of those who would be great. Just keep the list.....you know ....the list! Besides, as 'Official Lawyer of the Mutha Beautiful Thread' I need you. What would Perry Mason have done without Hamilton Burger et al.? [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: jd ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw the Justicar of the MBT: Fair Patch I have returned...<hr></blockquote> Welcome back Joe! I see you made a successful landing. Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by jd: Hiram I would consider it an honor as my first official game back in the pool to eviscerate, ruminate, pontificiate and bitch slap you up the side o' your cranky assed head in a manly and civil game. Any preferences on your method of dispatch? Ahh, hell's bell's Joseph what the Sam Hill has been going on here since my sabbatical. Get your candy ass back in here, pick up your mantle and quit your whining. You are the Once and Future Justicar always were, always will be. Take advice from a 'simple country lawyer', you will always be hated, despisd and outcast, but such are the burdens of those who would be great. Just keep the list.....you know ....the list! Besides, as 'Official Lawyer of the Mutha Beautiful Thread' I need you. What would Perry Mason have done without Hamilton Burger et al.? [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: jd ]<hr></blockquote> Okay,My forces will be 5000 Points of Unrestricted British lads and armor thingies Your forces will be 300 points of German stuff that you can only spend points on fortifications and support. But you can't buy anything with a gun or wheels. I'll send the setup later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 jd, welcome back, my Liege. It is great to know that you didn't fall and break a hip, or need one of your breasts removed. If you're still up for it, send along that old battlion-sized massacre. Mayhaps I can stick around long enough to finish it this time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Persephone: Welcome back Joe! I see you made a successful landing. Persephone<hr></blockquote>Provisionally Patch, only provisionally. We shall have to see. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted January 16, 2002 Share Posted January 16, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by jd: It is with sadness and trepidation I announce my return..(to deafening silence no doubt.) <hr></blockquote> It is with great trepidation, loathing, gnashing of teeth and wailing that we note your return! I'm not sure whether to welcome back a comrade in arms, or to give the right royal cesspool welcome of SOD OFF? Now excuse me, I have to speak with the serf who was in charge of changing the locks to the front door. Seems he's been a bit remiss in his duties. Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Persephone: I present to you, the cross-dresser of the Cesspool and his wee spaniel. Persephone<hr></blockquote> That, my dear Patch, is a Yeknodling (before the vet's cruel designs) Yeknod Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 ...., no, no, no, I'm sure a vet wouldn't want to deal with OGSF, not without industrial rubber gloves and plentiful supply of tranquilisers... thought's just, well, silly and the mere notion of steralised instruments around.... no, no I don't want to go there... no, absolutely not... Yeknod Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moriarty Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 Lorak, scribe it thusly that my feeble forces have been topplemented by Joe Shaw in a blatantly gamey, mismatched scenario created by his partner in crime, MrSpkr. His forces were so scared of the onslaught perpetrated by my fearless gumchewers that they ran hither and thither off the map. Joe Shaw managed to eke out a tactical victory, 68-32. As far as the Justicar stuff is concerned, I am not an Olde One, nor do I care to be, but Joe get back to work ... and make more use of court reporters. We don't need more trials, as there is no need to keep Lawyer and lawyers, et. al., in work. But court reporters need our support and attention. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slapdragon Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Provisionally Patch, only provisionally. We shall have to see. Joe<hr></blockquote> I for one have missed Joe and hope he regains justicar. jd on the other hand can broil in the deepest pit of hell reserved for lawyers, although except for his profession I find him an agreeable sort. Certianly much better company than Gunny Bunny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bauhaus Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 I hate and loathe you Joe, but I suppose, just suppose it would be ok if you come back. But expect to be hated, you are after all the Justicar. That is your role. That would be like me without a thingy, Mace without his sheep, Berli without his 666, Peng without his Scotch.......you get the point. We all have a role, yours not-so-respected Justicar is that of a wind bag. Now piss off and get to work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted January 17, 2002 Author Share Posted January 17, 2002 Nice pic, Persephone. But the wee spaniel doesn’t look sad enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jd Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Okay,My forces will be 5000 Points of Unrestricted British lads and armor thingies Your forces will be 300 points of German stuff that you can only spend points on fortifications and support. But you can't buy anything with a gun or wheels.<hr></blockquote> Yep that should make for a fair match. Mace I have been pondering what to do with the paternity case that has found it's way to me. Seems actually like a class action by a bunch of sheep.....anything you'd know about? Hmmmm Slapp Really can't you come up with some other reason that that tired old saw. Hell, even I hates them, everyone does, so do try to be more than pendantically inspired. there's a good chap... Croda my boy, nice how the pain of squiredom never leaves them, or that unhealthy relationship with mum. Believe it or not I still have that last file (I think) but since I found out the only path thru the woods is mined (and in my younger days when that battle started, I seemed to have forgotten the pioneers) it may have mysteriously disappeared. However I shall rumage around. Moriarty Still the sore loser I see, however you do get bonus nice points as you probably were the only one to admidt losing to me during the interregum, but while it speak for your civility it does nothing for your smartness factor. In perusing, as much as I could stomach the swill and putrefaction of the last few threads, except for Dame Emma and Seanachai the prose and intelligence of the collective pool (nice pics Emma!) is about on level with Mouse. Well actually he has been more readable. Not lucidly or soberly mind you. Let's see some actual intelligent harangues and creativity here people. Or have you decended to Morelocks after all. Truly some Eloi exist? Is the discusive medium of exchange in reality "You suck! Yeah so do you!"? Are you not men? Well maybe not, just devo [ 01-16-2002: Message edited by: jd ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Panzer Leader Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 JD! How could I forget you?!?! The only time I ever won a TOTAL VICTORY defending against the (snicker) assault! Welcome back, me boy. Ol' Joe, I need justice! Seanachai and Berli had a whispered conversation in the hall and announced (summarily I might add) that I am to be neutered, never to give back through my progeny of squires what I so graciously achieved here in the Mutha Beautiful. Surely this goes against all reason and corrupts the purity of the MBT, non? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Col Deadmarsh Posted January 17, 2002 Share Posted January 17, 2002 Just curious...how do you bottom-dwellers support yourselves if you're talking to your pseudo-intellectual friends all day on this stupid thread? Is their some kind of a government system in place to keep you refresh monkeys from starving? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted January 17, 2002 Author Share Posted January 17, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Colonel_Deadmarsh: Just curious...how do you bottom-dwellers support yourselves if you're talking to your pseudo-intellectual friends all day on this stupid thread? Is their some kind of a government system in place to keep you refresh monkeys from starving?<hr></blockquote> Yep, and your tax dollars are paying for it. Now, don't you feel better? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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