imported_Hiram Sedai Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 Berli I have received once more the gift of Monday and am sore displeased. Tis a most maleovent gift and I suffer. Oh, how I suffer. The underlings, they call out with fake maladies, but the mail piles up. You have plagued me with this day and I abhor you still. When my manager calls and berates me, I understand that it is really your voice that emanates from my phone. I sit, tempted to bludgeon and eviscerate, but can only do that to my pastry. Damn, you Berli. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 An update of nothing much.... Except that the head of the shrivelled old gnome will soon be mine. I have saved a spot in the front garden for his carapace to be displayed alongside his severed head, for any passer-by to vent frustrations..or whatever upon. This of course is his just desserts for daring to troll around the outer boards and heap (tiny though it was) scorn upon AUSTRALIANS. He has failed in his feeble minded attempt to denigrate us and keep us from obtaining the greater glory that is truly ours. So as it needs to be, a right royal SOD OFF and crawl back to your insignificant poem prattling. [Fancy trying a Half track rush] Pah. Burlie and I are matching wits as I post. Although in his case he can only ever achieve 50% marks in anything because he is a half-wit. Lars Well, we play, sometimes. He needs to get some focus in life. Hanns ...If he sends a turn it's like a holiday ! Useless pillock needs to get a real life. Stop playing with it... Send a turn. Pondscum. You useless pile of Dalem-droppings send a set up, not too large...1500 is fine. Then we can see that your so-called Knight has picked a DUD. Donkeyman. You fit the mould too! A setup is required from your garrou-louse self. Can't remember who got lumbered with you. It must have been in an out - of - body experience. Poor sod. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by chrisl: I suffered a vampire bite as an undergrad and no longer appear in photos. It only got me once before it was staked, so I can go outside in the daytime, and eat garlic and such. Just the photos and mirrors don't work.<hr></blockquote> Wussl, do you really think I'd believe a story like that? And if it is true...I thought it was insects that you eat. I am now demanding a photo taken before your unfortunate encounter with a vampire. Don't tell me that none exist, Wussl, I'm not going to believe you. Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BilgeRat Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Ah! One of my favorite subjects. See that door over there? Yes, that one. Please allow it to hit you in the ass on the way out. SOD OFF!<hr></blockquote>Well Brown, I'm unsuprised to note your fearful response at word of the prison hulk formerly HMS Sturmovik. Tis without doubt that you are a prime candidate for incarceration within it's rotting hull. There along with all the other defaulters, rejects and mutineers would you reside. Your antics at daubing yourself in red and prancing about the decks with a trident were intend'd to occur only upon the ship crossing the Equator. Carrying on like Neptune hisself will earn you a spell in HMS Sturmovik or worse still transport to the Antipodes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 Now Berli I well recall that you don't care for RULES as a ... uh ... rule, but I suspect that in the case of Bilge Water you might make an exception. Allow me to remind one and all that any communication with an SSN who doesn't show the common courtesy of listing an email and a general location in the profile is against CessPool policy. Or, in the words of Lorak, we could just take him outside and shoot him. Joe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gates-slut Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 PShaw! are you looking into this conspiracy or not?! Oh that's right, I forgot, YOU WERE PART OF THE CONSPIRACY!!! Gates-slut Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawyer Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 Nothing happening here in my absence. Why am I not surprised? Patch, we returned your Justicar unharmed, more or less. Actually, less of Joe would be more. Where is our custom-designed logo? We're reduced to using one by Mace. Don't make me have to mention the name again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leeo Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Gates-slut: PShaw! are you looking into this conspiracy or not?! Oh that's right, I forgot, YOU WERE PART OF THE CONSPIRACY!!!<hr></blockquote> If you're not part of the solution, your name must be Joe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Lawyer: Patch, we returned your Justicar unharmed, more or less. Actually, less of Joe would be more. Where is our custom-designed logo? We're reduced to using one by Mace. Don't make me have to mention the name again.<hr></blockquote> Lawyer, your custom-designed logo is in the mail. Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Seanachai: What happened to Von Schrad and the van? I haven't seen him in donkey's years. <hr></blockquote> ... eh, Donkey's, did some one mention, donkeys? <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Yes, that one. Please allow it to hit you in the ass on the way out <hr></blockquote> ...eh, eh, donkeys, more donkeys? Yeknod Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by BilgeRat: Sergeant! One of the convicts appears to have escaped from the Sturmovik prison hulk. Take the odious little fellow into custody.<hr></blockquote> Ahoy, matey! Quarrantine Articles, para.2 subsection iii) Please impound yer rancid little coracle over yonder horizon and SOD OFF Yeknod [ 01-21-2002: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 Amateur comedy Hiram Style: A Nauty Adventure She was dressed in nothing at all. The lights were dimmed and I heard the soft, romantic music. I sidled up to her and looked longingly in her direction. My breathing became rapid and my body shook with anticipation. She sat there tantilizing me. I was a bad boy and she knew it. I inhaled her scent and it touched my spirit. I finnally found my nirvana. With trembling fingers I opened her top. I tried not to tear anything. I looked inside and found the joy that had eluded me for years. She was well endowed with cheesy goodness. I decided to be fresh, and nevermind the consequences. I reached in for the morsel of magical goodness. The cheeto touched my lips with... and again: I could hear the thumping of my heart. I wanted to be decadent and daring this night. If I could only stop salivating so much, then I wouldn't be so embarrased. I made sure my hands were clean and that I wasn't wearing white. She called to me. I know that I heard her call. She was in the kitchen waiting for me. It was time for a funky good luv fest, Cheeto Style. I heard a muffled, yet sultry voice call my name. I quickly put down the kitty and the Nude Teen Dwarves magazine. I ran as quickly as I could to the kitchen. I heard my name again, still muffled but a bit louder. I opened the door to her home. I don't need to knock because we already know each other and I'm always welcome. She sat there on the second shelf below the milk. She tantalized me with her orange bag. She was wearing her Chester Cheetah t-shirt again. I carefully cradled her bag and swept her away. In a booming baritone voice, I sang. Oh, Sweet Mystery of Cheetos, at last I found you!! I scampered back to the living room and stopped kitty from mounting the lamp. I sat in my favorite easy chair and sat my love interest in my lap. We were eye to cheese and words were unncessary. With trembling fingers I opened the portal to passion. The first tentative touch was to her top. Its all amateurish and original. Opinions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PondScum Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 Noba: as instructed by mon petit general, I am busy training my ranks of garlic-chewing poodle-fondlers in the proper etiquette of Pool Warfare, viz taunting and dying-a-lot. My elite company of Parisian waiters will insult, belittle, and generally ignore your forces. They have elan. They have panache. They have funny little berets. They will blow Gauloise smoke in your face and their dogs will crap on your sidewalk. And then they will charge you $10 for a coffee that arrives three hours late. Expect a setup shortly. In other news, Old One Liner is supposedly attacking me, but I've seen more action from my Inner Croda after a good vindaloo. His troops stumble around in the rain and skulk through the woods, apparently trying to bore me to death. Little does he realise that I have already experienced far worse: I've read a Seanachi post all the way through and survived. Did I mention that I have also vanquished UBB? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Amateur comedy Hiram Style: A Nauty Adventure She was dressed in nothing at all. The lights were dimmed and I heard the soft, romantic music. I sidled up to her and looked longingly in her direction. My breathing became rapid and my body shook with anticipation. She sat there tantilizing me. I was a bad boy and she knew it. I inhaled her scent and it touched my spirit. I finnally found my nirvana. With trembling fingers I opened her top. I tried not to tear anything. I looked inside and found the joy that had eluded me for years. She was well endowed with cheesy goodness. I decided to be fresh, and nevermind the consequences. I reached in for the morsel of magical goodness. The cheeto touched my lips with... and again: I could hear the thumping of my heart. I wanted to be decadent and daring this night. If I could only stop salivating so much, then I wouldn't be so embarrased. I made sure my hands were clean and that I wasn't wearing white. She called to me. I know that I heard her call. She was in the kitchen waiting for me. It was time for a funky good luv fest, Cheeto Style. I heard a muffled, yet sultry voice call my name. I quickly put down the kitty and the Nude Teen Dwarves magazine. I ran as quickly as I could to the kitchen. I heard my name again, still muffled but a bit louder. I opened the door to her home. I don't need to knock because we already know each other and I'm always welcome. She sat there on the second shelf below the milk. She tantalized me with her orange bag. She was wearing her Chester Cheetah t-shirt again. I carefully cradled her bag and swept her away. In a booming baritone voice, I sang. Oh, Sweet Mystery of Cheetos, at last I found you!! I scampered back to the living room and stopped kitty from mounting the lamp. I sat in my favorite easy chair and sat my love interest in my lap. We were eye to cheese and words were unncessary. With trembling fingers I opened the portal to passion. The first tentative touch was to her top. Its all amateurish and original. Opinions?<hr></blockquote> Hiram It was funny and original, unlike the writing of another Cesspool member who I will not name [cough]Bauhaus[/cough]. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to the store to buy some Cheesy Poofs. Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Its all amateurish and original. Opinions?<hr></blockquote> Hiram pays a visit to his doctor. Hiram - “Doc, my unit is orange.” The doctor runs many test but comes up totally perplexed. Finally he asks Hiram a few questions. Doc - “Do you work in a chemical plant?” Hiram - “No.” Doc - “Do you work at a nuclear reactor?” Hiram - “No.” Doc - “Well, what do you do?” Hiram - “I’m unemployed. I just sit around the house all day in the nude, watching porn and eating Cheetos.” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leeo Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Amateur comedy Hiram Style: A Nauty Adventure Opinions?<hr></blockquote> Cheesy. Very cheesy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Noba: An update of nothing much.... Donkeyman. You fit the mould too! A setup is required from your garrou-louse self. Can't remember who got lumbered with you. It must have been in an out - of - body experience. Poor sod. Noba.<hr></blockquote> Nobbit (circling paddock in a ponderous, doleful way) ... is that a challenge? Pathetic, utterly pathetic... it barely deserves a cow-pat ridden thistle's chance of... and from where? Nostrilalia? Yeknod Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Yeknodathon: ...SOD OFF Yeknod <hr></blockquote> Yekwow! You actually sounded like you might just have a pair...I thought I had already taken care of that...now where did I put my sword... Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted January 21, 2002 Share Posted January 21, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Persephone: Yekwow! You actually sounded like you might just have a pair...I thought I had already taken care of that...now where did I put my sword... Persephone<hr></blockquote> You can borrow mine Patch tis made from the finest Sheffield Steel, one swipe with that and he'll be ready to join the other Eunuchs..... Ouch....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 22, 2002 Share Posted January 22, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Persephone: Yekwow! You actually sounded like you might just have a pair...I thought I had already taken care of that...now where did I put my sword... Persephone<hr></blockquote> shreak! (measured plod around the paddock erupts into frantic gallopping) ... veterinary, veterinary (snort) Yeknod [ 01-21-2002: Message edited by: Yeknodathon ]</p> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yeknodathon Posted January 22, 2002 Share Posted January 22, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by YK2: You can borrow mine Patch tis made from the finest Sheffield Steel, one swipe with that and he'll be ready to join the other Eunuchs..... Ouch....... <hr></blockquote> ahem, *sniff* I am *sniff* unique Yeknod Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted January 22, 2002 Share Posted January 22, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Berli I have received once more the gift of Monday and am sore displeased. Tis a most maleovent gift and I suffer. Oh, how I suffer. The underlings, they call out with fake maladies, but the mail piles up. You have plagued me with this day and I abhor you still. When my manager calls and berates me, I understand that it is really your voice that emanates from my phone. I sit, tempted to bludgeon and eviscerate, but can only do that to my pastry. Damn, you Berli.<hr></blockquote> You, sir, are very welcome Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorak Posted January 22, 2002 Share Posted January 22, 2002 woohoo! Ok, sorry for my brief absense once again. But was in between computers. Finally have the new one up and running and my old one set up at my moms house. So I have been thinking of a way to make all of you mad. 3.4) The US is once again offending the rest of the world by daring to show up in the world cup. 6.IV. I know how you all hate planes and american football... So why not combine them? Hunting The Pats Lorak the loathed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dalem Posted January 22, 2002 Share Posted January 22, 2002 <blockquote>quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by PondScum: Noba: as instructed by mon petit general, I am busy training my ranks of garlic-chewing poodle-fondlers in the proper etiquette of Pool Warfare, viz taunting and dying-a-lot. My elite company of Parisian waiters will insult, belittle, and generally ignore your forces. They have elan. They have panache. They have funny little berets. They will blow Gauloise smoke in your face and their dogs will crap on your sidewalk. And then they will charge you $10 for a coffee that arrives three hours late. Expect a setup shortly. <hr></blockquote> Very not bad, laddie, very not unrespectable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFCElvis Posted January 22, 2002 Share Posted January 22, 2002 Wankers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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