Noba Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Grog Simon I have noted the use of the word "lame" in the past to descibe the quality, or lack of it, in a thread title. In this case to do so would be an insult to the capabilities of the handicapped. For are not the lame endowed with at least a rudimentary capability to ambulate. No, this one is entirely moribund, bereft of originality, devoid of a single redeeming feature. The only point of possible interest is that if the author is not 'Sleepy' which one of Snow White's little friends is he.Ooh, ooh, Sir ! Sir !..I know this one.... DOPEY, Sir ! {Hey. TWO GROGS ON ONE PAGE ! One official of course} Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Let it be known, worldwide, that TELSTRA SUCKS. I have 11 messages/turns in my outbox waiting to join the real world information stream... And NO. I have not forgotten to press the send/receive button. PILLOCKS. Have I mentioned, TELSTRA SUCKS ? They can jolly well SOD OFF. Noba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 It’s Monday morning again. I sat and thought about this day on Saturday while trying to figure out a way to stop the madness that will be this day. Many beers later I realized that I am powerless to stop the abomination that is visited upon me once a week. I’ve been looking at Sunday as “almost Monday” and that is the day that I start the obligatory weeping and gnashing of the teeth. Emails and voicemails bludgeon my sense of normalcy. I know that I am being punished for having a weekend. I should have known better. People calling out sick with false maladies. I scramble to complete tasks with the small hope that Tuesday will arrive sooner or later. I do hope that his Monday won’t be 48 hours long like the last one I experienced. I still bear the emotional scars from that one. So, I greet this morning with bloodshot eyes and an overpowering need for huge amounts of coffee and cigarettes. I won’t utter the name of the personage who has visited such abject misery upon me. I do hope that every day he experiences when he quits smoking is like one of my Mondays. Reap the carnage of smoker’s withdrawal, buddy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Speedy Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Seanachai: Speedy, I had thought better of you. Do you really want to spend eternity in Texas, you pillock?It reminds me of home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: I do hope that every day he experiences when he quits smoking is like one of my Mondays. Reap the carnage of smoker's withdrawal, buddy.Each day I suffer withdrawal will be visited upon you each and every Monday of your miserable life. I will put every ounce of my suffering into your Mondays Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Hiram Sedai Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: I do hope that every day he experiences when he quits smoking is like one of my Mondays. Reap the carnage of smoker's withdrawal, buddy.Each day I suffer withdrawal will be visited upon you each and every Monday of your miserable life. I will put every ounce of my suffering into your Mondays</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: It’s Monday morning again. Not only that, but it's Monday morning in the middle of a snowstorm. I sit and look out the door at the amorphous lumps that are snow covered cars. Women trudging by in long cloth coats, heavy black boots and babushkas. It resembles Moscow during the Kruschev years. Not a pretty sight. I remember how we'd laugh when we called him "the big, grey baby". But we're not laughing now. Now we're staring at the snow, wondering when it might end. Should I venture out? Does my need for Take-out outweigh my desire for warmth and safety? My office is a womb. A womb with a view. I have decided. I will spend the afternoon with wet sneakers. I will scrape off my car and I will look the morons who have forgotten how to drive in snow over the last two weeks and say, "Stay in your own lane, butthead! Turn on your headlights, Braniac, or I'll grind your bones to make my bread!!!" My reward will be one, no, TWO eggrolls. Nos morituri mortem salutamus ave! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Croda Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 It's a little cool here, but no snow on the ground, so I thought I'd pass on a very heart-felt: Ha Ha. Now, Squire, make me a dessert out of your opponents' livers. Liege Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
illo Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Ha Ha. Now, Squire, make me a dessert out of your opponents' livers.Ho Ho Ho, Croda! I sincerely hope he does not make you dessert out of his opponents' ass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Croda: Now, Squire, make me a dessert out of your opponents' livers. LiegeYes, my liege. Immediately my liege. But...if I may oh cruel one...liver??? I mean, gag me with a back hoe. Wouldn't you rather I bop on down to the local Dairy Mart and get you the April issue of Clog Dancer Monthly and a Dove bar? (Amusing aside: Don't you just love clog dancing? It reminds me of hillbilly tap dancing on amphetamines. Wow!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
**YK2** Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Originally posted by Seanachai: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Persephone: YK2 and PawBroon on holiday at the beach. PersephoneThey are a handsome couple. The heads, not the bodies. I mean, the bodies belong to some sort of beach movie backlot. But the countenances, they belong to the Fair Emma and Marcel, The French. I'm not completely sure what the piece of heavy equipment hanging off of Emma's arm is all about.</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PawBroon Posted March 25, 2002 Share Posted March 25, 2002 Of course I wished you had those legs too! Err, and as for the lunchbox, the water was cold so I decided to pack a diet cookie... Patch those pics are really outstanding. We'll need to send you fresh material for you to work from. Now just to be EXTRA SURE, tell me we're not on the same beach as Croda & Hiram. I hate it when kids are frolicking around Emma... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by PawBroon: Now just to be EXTRA SURE, tell me we're not on the same beach as Croda & Hiram. I hate it when kids are frolicking around Emma...It might be the same beach...be careful where you step just in case Croda's buried in the sand again. That kid never learns... Persephone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchy Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 A singsong for Yeknod... Sweetly Sings the Donkey Sweetly sings the donkey at the break of day, If you do not feed him, this is what he'll say: Hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw, hee-haw. Persephone [ March 25, 2002, 09:00 PM: Message edited by: Persephone ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Elwen Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Persephone: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by PawBroon: Now just to be EXTRA SURE, tell me we're not on the same beach as Croda & Hiram. I hate it when kids are frolicking around Emma...It might be the same beach...be careful where you step just in case Croda's buried in the sand again. That kid never learns... Persephone</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Simon Elwen: Anyone care to deal the first blow? Anyone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Simon Elwen: crodaslittle wooden head is on the right of the picture! Who is this Slimy Elbow who dares to speak of my liege lord Croda The Cantankerous in such a manner. Come out and say that again you refugee from a Lilith Fair Concert. You sheep's clone, you thinly moustached poseur, you who consider Shemp to be the funniest Stooge, I double-dog dare you to come back here and have it out with me. You reprobate! Upon your birth, your parents tried to sell you to carny folk, but the carny's standards were too high. You fey dandy with the concave codpiece, SOD OFF!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Fox Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by BooR: Who is this Slimy Elbow who dares to speak of my liege lord Croda The Cantankerous in such a manner. Come out and say that again you refugee from a Lilith Fair Concert. You sheep's clone, you thinly moustached poseur, you who consider Shemp to be the funniest Stooge, I double-dog dare you to come back here and have it out with me. You reprobate! Upon your birth, your parents tried to sell you to carny folk, but the carny's standards were too high. You fey dandy with the concave codpiece, SOD OFF!!!Next! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Croda: It's a little cool here, but no snow on the ground, so I thought I'd pass on a very heart-felt: Ha Ha. Now, Squire, make me a dessert out of your opponents' livers. LiegeAren't you forgetting a little something? (tap..tap..tap....) <BIG>A FECKING TURN<SMALL> perhaps???<BIG> Oh, so sorry about the appalling language there Mr Croda, but thirdly, my PC's power supply did a very good impersonation of a smoking <BIG>"FFFZZZT..ZZATT!"<SMALL> last night, then firstly my 33 year old son phones just now and begs "Can I come and live with you and mom again" coz' his marriage is going down the gurgler!! Geezus H Chrisl -and Berli thinks he has problems!! <BIG>ARGGGHHHHH!!!<SMALL> AJ SOB..<SMALL>SOB..<SMALL>SOB...<BIG><BIG> -------------------------- <FONT COLOR = WHITE><SMALL> No sig today - I'm not feeling well....... <FONT COLOR = BLACK> AJ <small>[ March 26, 2002, 12:31 AM: Message edited by: AussieJeff ] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Hiram Sedai: Hey, I was kidding, big guy!! Come on now. You don't need to be putting any extra effort into this now. If giving up coffee and cigarettes wasn't enough... Had a doctor's appointment today. I am now on the If It Tastes Good, Spit It Out diet. Life can't get any worse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Fox Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by ClaytonsAussieJeff: FECKING momThank goodness Aussies can now disclaim this pretender. Real Aussies do not use euphemisms nor do they spell like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Simon Fox: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by ClaytonsAussieJeff: FECKING momThank goodness Aussies can now disclaim this pretender. Real Aussies do not use euphemisms nor do they spell like that.</font> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Fox Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Pandering to the seppos does not constitute multiculturalism. Originally posted by ClaytonsAussieJeff: Have a nice dayAnother antiAustralianism. Mace, help me out here, even the Top Sheila can pretend better than this drongo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Simon Fox: Mace, help me out here, even the Top Sheila can pretend better than this drongo.Yep, she's gotten it down pat, absolutely no flies on her! Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you! Amen! Crack another tube! Mace Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stuka Posted March 26, 2002 Share Posted March 26, 2002 Originally posted by Mace: Yep, she's gotten it down pat, absolutely no flies on her! I should hope not! The last thing we need around here is a fly-blown kitten. Sharndorf's socks smell bad enough already. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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