Mace Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: If, within the next 48 hours, AussieJeff, Mace, Noba, Speedy, Stuka (wherever he's gotten to), Goanna (same thing), and any or all other Australians of the Thread, as well as Lars (for no good reason at all) agree to move to France, then further violence at the hands of the Coalition will be unnecessary.I've never been to Paris. You paying? Mace 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mace Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Who to side with... easy decision really... G'day mates! Did it with Kitty, I'll do it with you as well. I hereby nominate Berli as a honorary, dinky-di, true blue, Aussie. Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi! Oi! Oi! Mace 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Berlichtingen Posted March 21, 2003 Author Share Posted March 21, 2003 Joe "the just a Holden-together" Shaw, how the pom-bastard has taken a fall. Thrown your lot in with a moose molester have ya? I reckon ya got the hots for North of our Bonza border. I reckon you?ll be havin? a naughty with that Dorosh bloke if this continues, ya nong. Have a brown, furry dog up ya Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi! Oi! Oi! [ March 21, 2003, 02:55 AM: Message edited by: Berlichtingen ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noba Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Mace: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Berlichtingen: Who to side with... easy decision really... G'day mates! Did it with Kitty, I'll do it with you as well. I hereby nominate Berli as a honorary, dinky-di, true blue, Aussie. Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi! Oi! Oi! Mace </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 *WARNING* Residents of Utah are advised that parts of the Ballistic Ubergnome Missile recently shot into space by the Coalition Of The *BOOT* are breaking off and falling to earth as he begins to re-enter from the Troppo-sphere. We strongly advise local hicks NOT to touch these parts, as they may have been contaminated by Pongy Insane Gas Scum. Instead, we advise they contact the Local Justicar who has the necessary thickness of skin to handle these offensive parts. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!! Sir AJ This has been a Community Announcement.... [ March 21, 2003, 06:06 AM: Message edited by: AUSSIEJEFF ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Latest Bulletin from "Downunder Command" (located in an undisclosed location): Dateline: Patterson New Jersey: In a move to avert 'shock and awe" and general messiness, on the Gnome, otherwise known as Ubergnome or Seanachai. Former Squire to Boo_Radley, Sir Nidan1, and his Squire, sgtgoody, have stepped in as aribitors and general annoyances in this looming conflict between said Gnome, and the inhabitants of the far off place known as "Aussieland." In an effort to avoid mayhem and "collateral damage" I am sending my Squire on a "fact finding mission" Goody, you are poke and prod Seanachai, causing scabous wounds which can be poked and prodded anew, until he reveals his true motives in the matter. I will take up my scepter of "The Loyal Order of the Paltypus" in an effort to mollify and subdue the outraged Ozztraylians. These efforts are being taken to avoid any and all unpleasantness which could arise out of this conflict. OUT!!!! [ March 21, 2003, 07:38 AM: Message edited by: Nidan1 ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lurkur Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Can't we simply nuke them all? just askin'... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Lurkur: Can't we simply nuke them all? just askin'... Nuke 'em all, Nuke 'em all, Nuke Sydney's famed Opera hall. Drop one on Stuka, another on Mace, Turn 'em to glass 'cause we don't want their base. So we'll make the whole continent glow, 'cause AussieJeff frankly just blows, Young Noba's a doofus, and so say we all, So come on my lads, Nuke 'em all. I didn't include Berli on account of how even the Australians don't REALLY want him and if we DID nuke Berli it might get Patch too and that would be a bad thing 'cause she's REALLY his better half ... or three quarters ... seven eighths. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Seanachai: But I am not a Gnome who is inflexible. If, within the next 48 hours, AussieJeff, Mace, Noba, Speedy, Stuka (wherever he's gotten to), Goanna (same thing), and any or all other Australians of the Thread, as well as Lars (for no good reason at all) agree to move to France, then further violence at the hands of the Coalition will be unnecessary.Can't I go to Italy instead? The food and wine is better. Plus I hear some of the women shave. True, it's generally the upper lip, but still, it's a start. SSN Hint Of The Day: Toss things out the window: tissues, cigarettes, food wrappers, etc. Now sod off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 No Nukes! No Nukes! No Nukes! Perhaps if we send The Justicar to Ozztraylia he could bore them into submission. So let it be written! So let it be done! Witnessed: Downunder Command Loyal Order of the Paltypus 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: No Nukes! No Nukes! No Nukes! Perhaps if we send The Justicar to Ozztraylia he could bore them into submission. So let it be written! So let it be done! Witnessed: Downunder Command Loyal Order of the Paltypus You're just mad 'cause I didn't mention you in the song. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nidan1 Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Nidan1: No Nukes! No Nukes! No Nukes! Perhaps if we send The Justicar to Ozztraylia he could bore them into submission. So let it be written! So let it be done! Witnessed: Downunder Command Loyal Order of the Paltypus You're just mad 'cause I didn't mention you in the song. Joe </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Lars: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Seanachai: But I am not a Gnome who is inflexible. If, within the next 48 hours, AussieJeff, Mace, Noba, Speedy, Stuka (wherever he's gotten to), Goanna (same thing), and any or all other Australians of the Thread, as well as Lars (for no good reason at all) agree to move to France, then further violence at the hands of the Coalition will be unnecessary.Can't I go to Italy instead? The food and wine is better. Plus I hear some of the women shave. True, it's generally the upper lip, but still, it's a start. SSN Hint Of The Day: Toss things out the window: tissues, cigarettes, food wrappers, etc. Now sod off. </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 In an effort to get to the bottom of numerous Aussie Myths, we have on the phone from downtown Sydney, the Dr. Ruth of Australian sex advisors: "Roo" Paul . We would caution those of you under 18 years of age to look away, quickly. Thank You, and now to proceed. Reporter: Thank you for joining us. As the Guru of Australian sexual assistance, you have indicated that you wish to clear up some common misconceptions regarding Aussie men. "Roo": That's correct, the Aussie's are indeed sly and cunning and have perpetuated numerous myths which today I will expose! Reporter: Excellent. Now it is our understanding that Australia was first settled by prisoners from Britain, a Penal Colony so to speak. You say this is incorrect. "Roo": A true Australian myth, the original settlers were not convicts, but instead the "sissy boys" who suffered from Penile Disfunction. Ergo the Penal Colony myth. Reporter: Very interesting. You also claim the Australian greeting "G'day Mate" has been totally misunderstood by non-Aussies and has led to some hard feelings. "Roo": Correct again, the actual phrase, which originated during the early days of the penal colony, was in fact a cheap pick-up line used against any mammel which would allow them to get close. The original version was "G'day. Mate?" Reporter: Makes sense. You have one more? "Roo": Yes, the most devious of all. The term "Put your shrimp on the Barbie". Reporter: Sounds innocent enough. "Roo": But that is the danger of the Australian. Actually, "shrimp" is a local slang word used to describe an Australian's "manhood". The "Barbie" is Australian slang for "any type of Blow-up doll that is fairly close anatomically to a female human, sheep, dingo, whatever." I don't think I need to go further with that. Reporter: Oh My God! Well thank you for this insightful interview. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Nidan1: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by Nidan1: No Nukes! No Nukes! No Nukes! Perhaps if we send The Justicar to Ozztraylia he could bore them into submission. So let it be written! So let it be done! Witnessed: Downunder Command Loyal Order of the Paltypus You're just mad 'cause I didn't mention you in the song. Joe </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Speaking of the English language, why does the phrase "barking mad" spring to mind whenever I think of Aussie Jeff? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Boo_Radley: Speaking of the English language, why does the phrase "barking mad" spring to mind whenever I think of Aussie Jeff? Very good observation! The story, as was printed in the Melbourne Times said that during one of Aussie Jeff's legendary binges, that he approached his date...uh dingo from the wrong end. Hope this helps! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe Shaw Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Pass another XXXXXXXX Lars me good maaate! *BUURRRRP!*AussieJeff you are mistaken ... or am I just stating the obvious again? Lars is a loyal (more or less) member of the Shavian House and therefore would never dream of betraying his fomer liege in a matter of this weight. He is also a loyal American and as such is completely opposed to anything that might smack of a goober nation like Australia. Senaachai decided, for no good reason as he himself said, that Lars would be sent to France but it had nothing to do with the Australian clique. Joe 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AUSSIEJEFF Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: </font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Pass another XXXXXXXX Lars me good maaate! *BUURRRRP!*AussieJeff you are mistaken ... or am I just stating the obvious again? Lars is a loyal (more or less) member of the Shavian House and therefore would never dream of betraying his fomer liege in a matter of this weight. He is also a loyal American and as such is completely opposed to anything that might smack of a goober nation like Australia. Senaachai decided, for no good reason as he himself said, that Lars would be sent to France but it had nothing to do with the Australian clique. Joe </font> 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by AUSSIEJEFF: <SMALL>Ahem. Anyone remember the compass? Help!<BIG><BIG> Cap'n AJ Coalition Of The Unwilling To Row Here it is ,my Master.I always have one (still from my grandfather ,who spend his younghood in forest) Sir konrad Faithfulllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll and ALWAYS SQUIRE TO SIR AUSSIEJEFF ROWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW people ,ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW 1,2,3 KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL 1,2,3 KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL 1,2,3 KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL HEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY some to ride and recover what was wrongfully taken he showed them how to regain it through the might of their hands HEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYY AND WREST IT FROM FALSE MEN BY AUSSIEJEFF 's laws.HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY OOLEEEEEEEEEEE <small>[ March 21, 2003, 11:56 AM: Message edited by: lenakonrad ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by Joe Shaw: Lars is a loyal (more or less) member of the Shavian House and therefore would never dream of betraying his fomer liege in a matter of this weight. He is also a loyal American and as such is completely opposed to anything that might smack of a goober nation like Australia.I'm not really sure they grow peanuts there, Joe. Whoop, just found this, The World's Best & Freshest Peanuts! Direct to you from Kingaroy - Australia's Peanut Capital But note they are way behind our native goobers in Georgia {USA!, USA!, USA!} in production. Way to go Jimmy! (Carter that is, not you OGSF, you couldn't grow anything besides toe nail fungus). The pretenders even have a "Magic Peanut" (Australia's answer to the Magic 8-Ball). Sad really. The Legend of the Magic Peanut Every peanut crop in Australia produces at least one Magic Peanut. They can be identified by the faint green phosphorescent glow that they emit during the New Moon. To find a Magic Peanut, you first need to search through peanut fields in pitch darkness until you locate a glowing pod, then carefully dig up the pod and put it into an air-tight container. Be sure to keep an eye out for savage dogs, tall kangaroos and very angry peanut farmers as you do so. Then lift the container high above your head and yell out "Gosh! I've just found a Magic Peanut" as loudly as you possibly can (Tip! If neighbouring farmhouse lights don't come on, you're not yelling loudly enough). Finally, take the container back to a farmhouse and put it carefully in the refrigerator. Then slap your forehead with your palm and say "I must be crazy to believe everything I see on the Net!" at least a dozen times as you realise what you've just done.... When I asked it "Why is AussieJeff such a complete wanker?" this is what I received for a reply, "We must accept life for what it actually is - a challenge to our quality without which we should never know of what stuff we are made, or grow to our full stature." Pretty much spot on, AussieJeff has always been a challenge to quality. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Boggs Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Originally posted by lenakonrad: Coalition Of The Unwilling To Row C oalition of the U nwilling to R ow The Aussies and the Aussie lovers are now going by the acronym CURS . How appropriate! [ March 21, 2003, 12:08 PM: Message edited by: Jim Boggs ] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lars Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 Settin' by the roadside on a summer's day Chattin' with my mess-mates, passin' time away Settin' in the shadow underneath the trees Goodness how delicious! Eatin' goober peas Peas, peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas Peas, peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas When a farmer passes the soldiers have a rule To shout out at their loudest "Mr.---here's your mule!" But there is a pleasure enchantinger than these It's wearin' out your grinders eatin' goober peas Peas, peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas Peas, peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas Just before the battle the general hears a row He says "the Yanks are comin', I hear their rifles now" Turns around in wonder and what do ya s'pose he sees The Georgia Militia, eatin' goober peas Peas, peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas Peas, peas, peas, peas, eatin' goober peas We think this song has lasted almost long enough Though the subject is most interestin' the rhymes are mighty rough When this war is over and we're free from lice and fleas We'll kiss our wives and sweethearts And...then...we'll...Gobble goober peas. Pah, take that you Down Under Goober Pea Wanna-Be's. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest konrad Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 YANKEES GO HOME!!! Sir konrad FAITHFUL SQUIRE TO SIR AUSSIEJEFF I'll be back later to see if what is written there has been read and understood 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Radley Posted March 21, 2003 Share Posted March 21, 2003 All the Oddztralians in a boat, eh? Not to mention Lenakonrad (but there I went and mentioned him, drat!). This reminds me a bit of "The Tridget of Greva". And when I went to check on the spelling of that, I discovered something quite alarming. Ring Lardner was one of us! Looky here 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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