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AleMaster's Waffle of Cheery Threats


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Originally posted by Sgtgoody:

I think Soddball put so much fog into his scenario that it is seeping into all the others.

A bar brawl with multi ton vehicles armed with high velocity cannon. You can't ask for more than that.

GRRRRRR :mad: :mad: :mad: (because I felt it was needed)

It gets better. I promise. :D
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Originally posted by Abbott:

Hello all...

I have been working on a scenario for PB vs. MG Two. Let me know when you gentleman will be ready please. I think it is time to switch sides MG as Axis vs PB Allied. A more balanced effort as MG has become an experienced player. I thoroughly enjoyed your excellent AAR gentleman, thank you!

Abbott, our GoodMasterWaffleCheeryAle will break out into a nasty rash at the suggestion that he play any side but the Soviets. There's something about Russian TNT that is a big turn-on for him. Either that, or he has a peculiarly masochistic streak that loves seeing his troops slaughtered by Axis TNT. Or maybe it's both! :D
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HA HAAAA Limberg my kind of giy maggot!! :mad: These people are lazy slugs and don't ever let them forget it!! :mad: Wake up maggots I was just testing you fat, bubble-gum-resembling asses! :mad:

As you sit on your fat ass and read this like the skunk-banging, sheep-pumping krauts that you are, I'm chucking TNT at you that's so hot!, so god damned furious! So rotten-toothed foul that I swear to the god of TNT it just crawled out of Hitler's AAAASSS!!! :mad:

Open up scumballs it's time for supper!! :mad:

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*manaical laughter*

HAHAHAH, the trap is sprung now, Goodale, and your little city, apparently the capital city of Sinkholia, will soon be mine. Oh yes.

In other news, to the extent the point of Soddball's little glimpse into hell wasn't obvious, the reinforcements are getting the point across. Now, if'n I'm lucky enough to actually bump into mike the wino's troops (by shear luck, I'm sure) I'll make them pay.

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Oh, I've made a little scenario for two friends of mine who are new to the game.

If any of ya are interested in taking it for a spin, let me know. I'm fairly sure that it's wholly, utterly unbalanced, I just can't decide which side is the problem.

Ah, to hell with it, it has tons of TNT. :mad: :mad:

Preview pic here for the curious:

Scenario Pic

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Aaaahhh, Becket you marvelous bastard THAT IS WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!!! There are a few buildings all ready on fire and the game hasn't even begun. What I really like about it, note this Soddball , I don't see any feckin fog. Gawd knows I have gotten enough of that IRL over the last month or so. Might be able to even see an opponent. Send me a copy and I will test-drive with a friend.

Turns slowing down due to the fact that copious amounts of beer and wine over the last 2 days has taken its toll on my mortal form. Oh what I do in the name of professional duty. :D

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Originally posted by MasterGoodale:

HA HAAAA Limberg my kind of giy maggot!!

Listen merkinbreath,

It's lUmbergh, not lImbergh!! :mad: :mad:

Don't let that happen again Mistress Gaywhale or I'll shove so many JDAMs up your ass there's gonna be Goodale-encrusted bloody chunks of GPS reciever in orbit!! :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

Capiche????

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Heeheee! All of my turns are in!

Teddy Windsor and I are still slogging through Goodale's creation. I have been beaten up by rocket-delivered molten TNT and hidden AT guns are making my day sucky.

Hortlund and I are both waiting for the damn game to finish - we have gone into extra time in a big way.

Goodale is about to discover the folly of letting me defend as Germans. Muahahah! :mad:

I have just started playtesting my scenario "Inferno" against the lucky Jussi Kohler - molten face-melting flamethrower death all round! :mad: :mad:

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Originally posted by Soddball:

I have just started playtesting my scenario "Inferno" against the lucky Jussi Kohler - molten face-melting flamethrower death all round! :mad: :mad:

....which takes place at night in heavy fog...

This certainly seems to be the biggest and uglyest form of perversion I have ever stumbled across... :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

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Turns out. Got the scenario Becket hopefully I will drag my neighbor over to kill-dismemver and otherwise obliterate him, all in good fun ya know.

Now as to this originally posted by Jussi Köhler

This certainly seems to be the biggest and uglyest form of perversion I have ever stumbled across

The scenario or the designer?

[ January 31, 2003, 12:31 PM: Message edited by: mike the wino ]

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Listen up Maggots! :mad: I'm in the mood to sling some SERIOUS TNT tonight and this weekend!! I've noticed lately that the scenarios my opponents have preferred have generally lacked TNT chuckage and abundance and it disgusts me!! :mad:

From this point forward, every new PBEM scenario I play/create will have at least 3000 points with no limitations on TNT!! If I want to buy 3000 points worth of artillery than so be it! That's right!! I want to be able to chuck, sling, spew, splash, throw, toss, propel, catapult, plant, spit, shoot, and just plain old relocate as much god damned TNT as my arms can lift and greedily watch the resulting blizzard of limbs and organs explode around me!!! :mad: GGAAGRAGRARGAGRGRAAGRAGRAGR!!! :mad:

So anyome who is willing to either make a scenario that fits this description (no limits on points!!) or play me in a QB that fits these parameters - Drop that poodle and wash your noodle scumbag because your ass is grass! :mad: drop me a setup or ask me to make one or ask somebody else to make one!!

I'm gonna spit so much TNT in your general direction sir your grunts won't see sunlight for a year!! :mad:

I am ALWAYS the Ruskies so don't even ask!! And I will defend!! Make it a small map, make it a medium map, anything but large!! I want BIG GUNS skunk nuts!! You can never have too many of those!!

ARGRAGRGRAGRAGRAGRARGRAGRAGRGRGRAGRGRGAGRRGRArgrAAGRGRRGR GR GRGR gr grgra grgr gr grgr grgrGRGRAGRAGRAGRAGRGRARGGRAGRAGR!!!! :mad:

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Originally posted by MasterGoodale:

...raving something about 3,000 points of TNT... I want to be able to chuck, sling, spew, splash, throw, toss, propel, catapult, plant, spit, shoot, and just plain old relocate as much god damned TNT as my arms can lift and greedily watch the resulting blizzard of limbs and organs explode around me!!! ...and more of the same.

Goodale, quiet down and try to focus for a second. You really don't want a "blizzard of limbs and organs" exploding around you. :rolleyes: The idea of this game is to make the other player's men get caught in a hail of flaming TNT. Not your own.

Repeat this to yourself as often as necessary: "My men blown up = bad. Other men blown up = good".

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Originally posted by MasterGoodale:

Just remember maggot lips, War is a lot like pool. :mad:

Do a lot of people die shooting pool? Or do you mean a lot of people drown in a swimming pool? :confused:

Oh, I'll bet you mean war is a lot like the Cess Pool in that "other" thread. You mean self-indulgent, inhumane, devoid of a positive purpose, too awful to talk about with anyone who hasn't seen it for him/herself? tongue.gif

Now, I have heard the analogy between hand grenades and horseshoes (Close only counts in ...). I've also heard that "Love is a Battlefield". I must admit war and pool is a new one for me. Next you'll be telling me war has layers, like an Ogre, or an onion. Or a cake. Or parfait. :D

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Since Dave H mentioned hand grenades one of my favorite inspirational messages for employees standing around doing nothing is to walk up and say, "Did you know that one hand grenade would kill you all?". Or for the real slackers, "Quit jerking your gerkin and get back to working."

Ah, I love inspiring and motivating maggots. So here I go again.

Mr. Peck-it I have received your file and have to ask, what does it mean that your troops are camping? Does that mean that your namby-pamby-junior-girls-auxillery-rifle squad is roasting marshmellows as opposed to marching to the inevitable end...their deaths? All you do is extend their lives by turns. I am coming. And I got my buddy...FLAMING F*ING TRUCKLOADS OF RIGHTEOUS TNT!!!

As for Dave H this walking boil has a surprise coming to him.

*Hint: It involves TNT, lots of screaming, his dead troops, and me laughing. But I don't want to give away the ending.*

[ February 01, 2003, 04:22 AM: Message edited by: mike the wino ]

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WTF!! You maggots are going to let the GLORIOUS-TNT-CHUCKIN-HALL-OF-FLAME fall to page 2. :mad: :mad: :mad:

Pah. :rolleyes:

Send me a turn Dave H . The last one has me on the edge of my seat...with a bucket of flaming TNT to hurl in your general direction.

And I know I don't need to encourage the Becket -bot. That damn thing generates more files than Micheal Dorosh posts. It is unreal, unholy and soon to crushed.

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