I Started A New Peng Thread And All I got Was This Lousy Hunk Of Cess.....

[Forever Babra]

Originally posted by Lawyer:

His stupid strategy yields predictable results, and now he comes here whining. Have none of it, Lads!

It is true my deployment was not the best. It is also true that my position became untenable, hence my withdrawal. The rest of your account is fiction (Puma? What Puma?). Interesting how the "computer generated set-up" gave you a host of armour and myself ONE tank.

However, your cry-baby email of "gamey" because I choose retreat rather than death is just childish. I hear lawyers argue cases on the merits; you're a lawyer like I'm an astronaut.

Now shut the hell up and send the file so I can be done with you.

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"Za Rodentia!"

[Lawyer]

Originally posted by Forever Babra:

It is true my deployment was not the best. It is also true that my position became untenable, hence my withdrawal. The rest of your account is fiction (Puma? What Puma?). Interesting how the "computer generated set-up" gave you a host of armour and myself ONE tank.

However, your cry-baby email of "gamey" because I choose retreat rather than death is just childish. I hear lawyers argue cases on the merits; you're a lawyer like I'm an astronaut.

Okay, Moonboy, you're an asstronut. And computers don't play sides. Take yer whine-fest to BTS.

But I must laugh at your "my position became untenable, so I was forced to evacuate" claptrap. You had about 10 turns to move your troops back to defend against the main attack. It was happening under that big smoke cloud, in case you missed it.

Here's a tip... You can move troops after the game begins to better positions. You sure knew how to make them run rather than fight at the end.

Hey, dying at the Hands of the Law is certainly better than dying at the mitts of a damned court reporter.

Enjoy the honor! You'll get your turn when I get home.

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You're never alone with a schizophrenic.

[Forever Babra]

Originally posted by Lawyer:

You had about 10 turns to move your troops back to defend against the main attack. It was happening under that big smoke cloud, in case you missed it.

Yes, I'm sure you would have loved that. Unlike you, I don't march troops across open ground to certain death, particularly against tanks when I have no AT assets. Gamey, gamey me...

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"Za Rodentia!"

[Mace]

Originally posted by DekeFentle:

I would be willing to wager you and Stuka drink Budwiser.

You're a very cruel and downright insulting entity implying that we top aussies drink that sh*t!

OK then, I have you pencilled in for a good thrashing. Expect an email in about a week to a fortnight as a vacant slot in my dance card comes up. We will then discuss terms of combat.

Mace

[This message has been edited by Mace (edited 03-08-2001).]

[DekeFentle]

Originally posted by Croda:

The prophecies have always told of the one who is dumber than ****, and lo! The prophecied has come to pass.

You should know that Crodaburg, had you read up on your Peng, is the ugly befreckled stepsister of a scenario I created to torment those whose souls wouldn't rate a search-party of drunken monkeys were they lost. That sure seems to apply to you. It has been dubbed the official (if wholly unrecognized and unsupported) death map of petulent CessPool newbies whose verbosity is outgunned only by their ignorance.

ad nauseam...

Less intelligent than fecal matter I may be, groping for wit, rational thought or even a shred of self respect you certainly are. Searching or reading through the Archives that are PENG is like trying to find a particular drop of Hamsters drool, that ocean is just to large. I fully expect to be the target of this pools foul incoherent sense of humor, pathetic though it may be and stick by my acceptance of the challenge. Send me the setup but have the intestinal fortitude to bring upon my demise with your own flippers. Failing to do so will only expound upon the widely known ineptitude you demonstrate on such a consistent and unwavering basis.

I am truly amazed at the fetid smell of fear which rolls from every reply to my posts. Seanachai and Germanboy have taken the tact of ignoring me which clearly demonstrates their gross inefficacy to deal with even the lowest newbie. I have graced these reviled, sallow hued halls festooned with the ramblings of myopic malcontents who’s miserable attempts at taunting deprive any guest or denizen of even a modicum of eyebrow raising with at least passable prose and have found only drivel in reply.

If it’s a joke for a battle that you must force upon me please do. The joke my petulant pundit may be on you.

When the Whuppin' boy speaks, gather round and hearken well. Pain is humanities most eloquent mentor.

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Winning is why we play!

[DekeFentle]

Originally posted by Mace:

You're a very cruel and downright insulting entity implying that we top aussies drink that sh*t!

OK then, I have you pencilled in for a good thrashing. Expect an email in about a week to a fortnight as a vacant slot in my dance card comes up. We will then discuss terms of combat.

Mace

I eagerly await your proposal sir.

When the Whuppin' boy speaks, gather round and hearken well. Pain is humanities most eloquent mentor.

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Winning is why we play!

[dalem]

Originally posted by Hamsters:

You horse's ass, how many months have you been complaining that we wouldn't give you a game? The offer is rescinded, we hope you rot.

I think you're confusing me with someone (or somefink) else. I have plenty of games. If you still want to be my CM Friend after apologizing for your gross error, I will condescend to interact with you.

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I LOST A BLOOD HAMSTER BATTLE TO PETERNZ. MY SIG FILE IS NOW HIS AND I AM HIS SLAVE. PLEASE ABUSE ME AS YOU SEE FIT AND CALL ME A DOO-DOO HEAD. IT IS MY PLACE IN LIFE, I WILLINGLY ACCEPT IT.

[Hamsters]

Originally posted by dalem:

Dure de dur dur!

Alas and alack poor Dalem is earless and brainless. So, we have returned from our whanging of Elvis. Poor, poor Elvis. He won't be here for a while, he's still trying to find the remains of his spleen out there on the battlefield.

Yes, Elvis's total topplement was achieved via simple genius on our parts. Everywhere Elvis attacked, we had men and guns waiting for him. The uberbunker of doom, supported by the uber-SdKfz of destruction cut him to pieces, allowing a company of veteran Volksgrenediers to hold of, roughly, a reinforced Army of troops.

Lorak scribe thus:

Hamsters: The master.

Elvis: But the learner.

[Agua Perdido]

Originally posted by Croda, who is a drooling halfwit:

You shall play Crodaburg versus Agua Velva.

Whatsisname has to challenge me properly, first. Even in the unlikely event he were able to come up with enough witty vituperatives for me to notice, I sure wouldn't pick a deranged abortion of a scenario like Crodaburg. (Unless you've fixed it so my side would be exclusively pillboxes, mines and jabos in true Hamsters fashion.)

Besides, if you want a proper Battle o' the Network Squires, it'll have to be on a night/fog map full of conscript volkssturm and green frenchies, starring Jaye P. Morgan. The old ways are best.

Whinging is why we play!

GONG!

Agua Perdido

[Edited to add an uncomplementary reference to Croda.]

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Feel the pain of outlaw cinema!

[This message has been edited by Agua Perdido (edited 03-08-2001).]

[Priest]

FYI

Lorak show up drunk to TCP/IP games!

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Sir are you sure you want to go to red alert...it would mean changing the bulb

-Kryton of Red Dwarf

[Iskander]

Originally posted by Priest:

FYI

Lorak show['s] up drunk to TCP/IP games!

TANJ! If there is truth in this statement, Lorak, name the drink and the time! I can hang your pointy, pointy ears next to jd's law diploma and OGSF's sporran... soon to be joined by Lawyer's (no bold/no accident) hair piece.

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"I send you a kaffis of mustard seed, that you may taste and acknowledge the bitterness of my victory."

"Legal advice is very often divorced from reality in my humble opinion" - BTS

[Seanachai]

Originally posted by Priest:

FYI

Lorak show up drunk to TCP/IP games!

I basically assume all my opponents play drunk most of the time. Sounds like Elvis, Peng, and Hiram play their games from inside a liquor store in order to save valuable time and gasoline.

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Tremble, tyrants and you perfidious opprobrium of all the parties,

Tremblez! your parricidal projects finally will receive their prices!

But these sanguinary despots, But these accomplices of Berli,

All these tigers which, without pity, Bauhaus the centre of their mother!

We will enter the career When our elder is not there any more,

We will find there their dust And the trace of their virtues

[Lorak]

BAH! I say !

The truth. After a hell day at work my boss decides we should leave and "discuss" the project over a beer or two. Soooo.. We head over to Maggie O'Riley's Irish Pub for a pint. (my choice, I have a membership there).

I meet up with some sympathizer friends over from county Monaghan. We load up the juke box full of old irish songs and proceed to order pints of Guinness like they were going to stop making it. Pints lead to singing, singing to more drinking and talking...ect.

Well... Next thing you know it is last call and time to head home. (I'll also have you know that I made it there on time).

Now to conclude and point out where Priest is wrong.

1) In his half-heated attempt to say that a bunch of Irish men, sitting around drinking Guinness is wrong. (Hell that is nature.)

2) That I showed up Drunk. (Never seen an Irishman get drunk on Guinness)

As for our game... My God what a long drawn out affair this thing is. Two and a half hours to process appox 15 turns.

Oh...tome update:

Meeks-win

Elvis-loss

Lorak the loathed

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"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Combatmissionclub

and for Kitty's sake

=^..^=

[Egbert]

Originally posted by Seanachai:

Your post, lad, is wonderfully...incoherent. But not in the way that Mensch or Meeks's(latest incarnation) posts are incoherent. Their posts are incoherent due to madness or mad intent. Your post is just...what the hell are you trying to say?

Lost in the subtly ,eh? I'll 'splain. The NSSB is advertised for loosers. I am a NewB, informed to practice on the insults to rise the ire to a challenge.

One must first stick his head above the muck to have it stomped back down. I appreciate your apparently gentle step but perchance you would press harder that I know for sure you are there and see how thick it gets and how high it rises? I shall endeavor to use language you comprehend.

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"Thou art but a crusty batch of nature." WS

[BFCElvis]

Hey Lorak..thanks for picking up on that loss to Meeks so quickly..good work.

Also,

Peng : win

Elvis : loser

Peng : loser

Elvis : win

In a late night double feature TCP/IP.

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"When they finally put you in the ground..I'll stand on your grave and tramp the dirt down" Elvis Costello

[Lorak]

Originally posted by Elvis:

Hey Lorak..thanks for picking up on that loss to Meeks so quickly..good work.

Also,

Peng : win

Elvis : loser

Peng : loser

Elvis : win

In a late night double feature TCP/IP.

Ahh, Will I try to please.

Tome update:

As above

Lorak the loathed aka "drunk tcp'er"

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"Do not wait to strike till the iron is hot; but make it hot by striking."--William Butler Yeats

Cesspool

Combatmissionclub

and for Kitty's sake

=^..^=

[David Aitken]

Old news, but hey, the General Discussion Forum (aka The Dungeon) is a rather timeless place.

"Blleeaarrgghh!!" goes the troll!

STOMP goes the Steve!

i am the HARDMAN

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where's the BAR? – ColonelSquirrel

Where's the Bar? This is the most important and critical question I've ever seen on a thread – Rex_Bellator

[CATguy]

Oh man where do I step in the thread!!!!!

[chrisl]

Originally posted by CATguy:

blather

Try volunteering to fight one of the other things that first appeared in the last few pages for our entertainment.

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"If you can taste the difference between caviar on a cracker and ketchup on a Kit-Kat while blindfolded, you have not had enough aquavit to be ready for lutefisk." (stolen from some web page about lutefisk)

[Mark IV]

Originally posted by CATguy:

Oh man where do I step in the thread!!!!!

Things you could step in, borrowing liberally from the only worthwhile notion that the revolting peasant, chrisl, has ever had:

Priest

DekeFentel

Egbert

Naja

CATguy (oops)

A minefield.

A network Survivor clone.

A TRP for 14" shells.

Australia.

Any thread started by Gunny Bunny.

There are more, but you get the idea. Or do you? Please read the last 6000 posts, finance a dime, and buy a clue.

[Herr Oberst]

News from the front:

The "Stug of Terror" has routed Crawdad's fine Frenchie troops. This lone IIIg commands the battlefield. A quote from the commander of this intrepid piece of armor follows:

"Zis vas a gut fight, ja, but now all I zee ist der azzholes unt elbows..."

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To the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee...

Damnable image code...

[This message has been edited by Herr Oberst (edited 03-09-2001).]

[Naja]

It is true DekeFentle is the "chosen one" his wit and grasp of "Peng" has surpassed the once and mighty one who no longer graces the soiled pages that were once Peng. How do the old and feeble minded cling to the past? Must be Hamsters wit that drives them onward....... or maybe just plain old MkIV the butane torch of wit

[Croda]

Originally posted by Herr Oberst:

News from the front:

The "Stug of Terror" has routed Crawdad's fine Frenchie troops. This lone IIIg commands the battlefield. A quote from the commander of this intrepid piece of armor follows:

"Zis vas a gut fight, ja, but now all I zee ist der azzholes unt elbows..."

Funny, in my game the "Stuf of Terror" is black. In that case, I must attribute your routing of every one of my beleagured green frenchies to some sort of gaminess. Next thing you know, you'll be using invisible skins so that I can't see you!

Small matter, As soon as we're done with this, I have a setup that will make you cringe like you had a snake bite your nuts.

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Woot! - Maximus2k

The New CessPool

[Geier]

I just spent some time reading the original Mother-beautiful thread, pages 17-65. I got paid too.

Toodles,

Johan

[mensch]

Originally posted by Geier:

I just spent some time reading the original Mother-beautiful thread, pages 17-65. I got paid too.

Toodles,

Johan

Do we care? ... NO! now skitter of like a good cockroach.